hold me in this wild, wild world

Description

Seulrene breakup AU: it’s the small details that come in an unending deluge. All of her senses constantly remind her that she’s missing someone, a part of herself. 

Foreword

"But it’s the small details that come in an unending deluge. All of her senses constantly remind her that she’s missing someone, a part of herself. If she closes her eyes, she visualises the way Seulgi dashes up to her, always excited to see Joohyun. If she plugs in her earphones, she remembers how they would sing their favourite songs, or how Seulgi always hummed under her breath whenever they studied in the library together until the librarian gave her a stern glare. Joohyun’s not managed to find a fabric softener that did not smell like the clothes that they wore. And certainly, finding Seulgi’s old plaid shirt in her closet seventeen days after their breakup sent her into a work overdrive, her consciousness striving to eradicate all traces of a slowly but increasingly unfamiliar familiar."

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Was listening to some Bastille (Happier, Things We Lost in The Fire) and shamelessly stole the title from the lyrics of Warmth. I think Warmth implies a happy ending? This fic would probably be 4/5 chapters long! (Also yes, noting the tags: I'm not ending this on a sad note!!)

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Thanks Shea from Camouflage Studio for the poster!! 

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[warnings for: mentions of mental health struggles, implied societal homophobia]

Author's Thoughts
Goldfinchex
post first regret later is my whole mood... ugh
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wpxl09 #1
Chapter 3: But... was Seulgi cheating on her? I’d be so disappointed :(
She was even ready to pack up for a ‘break’.
No matter how problematic a relationship is, you just do not run into someone else’s arms. Even if your partner has been pushing you away or was not planning to be public with you...
But ughhhh what is really the deal?
Joohyun’s mom’s knows? Or they are really her dreams about her homophobic parents?
So many qs!
wpxl09 #2
Chapter 1: THIS IS JUST RHE FIRST CHAPTER AND IT HURTS.
WHY DID THEY BREAK UP!!
PilotIsMyJob #3
Chapter 4: Now I'm curious on how this story going to end..so good!
JojoB88 #4
Chapter 4: Ahhh this was a stressful chapter. So much angst. So much sadness and hurt huhu. I am still really rooting for the both of them though!
tiggerbounced #5
Chapter 4: lol I knew I recognized the title

ANYWAY, I am very pleased you updated even if it's a post first regret later kinda thing, just yeet them at us tyvm hahaha

both of them are idiots in this one, they are talking but also not quite talking?? in the sense that they are each spewing their own thoughts and feelings but also directly trying to counter each other's points and in some instances Seulgi is outright invalidating Joohyun's feelings lol -- a couples' therapist would have a field day with these two.

perhaps now that the initial spew of angst and FeelingsTM is over (I note Joohyun seems more relieved?? in the last para), they can take the time to do...more reflection and sort out their Issues, both individually...and then maybe together.

I appreciate that we got to hear more of what Seulgi thinks in this chapter and I do sympathise but these two really need to stop pretending to be Stoic AF. Instead of conking their skulls together like coconuts may I suggest divine interference, readers can break the 4th Wall and toss coconuts at them until they relent, break and fix their hahahaha
tiggerbounced #6
Chapter 3: <span class='smalltext text--lighter'>Comment on <a href='/story/view/1385633/3'>all that we've amassed | ...</a></span>

I know you gave us Seulgi's POV in this but I really really love the way you write Joohyun's. The way you get inside her head and make us feel like we're right there with her experiencing the things she's thinking, feeling, hearing, saying and doing. From her internal struggles to how that plays out irl (and of course some of Seulgi's actual POV to show both sides) and it just makes me go "Oh Joohyun, you need a hug", like I wanna be mad that she broke up with Seulgi but I can't because look at the girl, she's so deep in her head she can't get out and it's affecting their relationship.

I do need to say that the para on Joohyun's dreams and how it's like a cinematic reel really wrecked me, is Truly Beautiful Writing.

And of course, of course you referenced Lemon :')
tiggerbounced #7
Chapter 2: <span class='smalltext text--lighter'>Comment on <a href='/story/view/1385633/2'>if you close your eyes</a></span>
<span class='smalltext text--lighter'>Comment on <a href='/story/view/1385633/2'>if you close your eyes</a></span>

...finally getting around to commenting on this...it was like one of my new year resolutions...which I supposed has been sped up by you updating it so bless

I procrastinated commenting on this chapter for so long because I didn't have the wherewithal at the time to give it the due amount of time and effort it deserves but what I want to say is that reading it the 3rd? 4th?? time around still hits me the same way. The flashbacks (especially the ones where Joohyun is dramatically scared of everything and Seulgi is like *must protecc*), the whole damn para on "what is family" (i sat with those words for a long while I must confess), and that description of Bogum LOL -- all of it gives me so many feels that idk how to even really describe ugh
claykai #8
Chapter 4: I like this part so much “Maybe she should stop living in a thousand and one maybes...” but thinking about it, I guess there’s always a part of maybes in life, no matter how minuscule it may be, most especially if things don’t go as we expected.

I can’t even blame either Seulgi or Irene for feeling the way they’re feeling. Nonetheless, while it may be understandable, it does not automatically equate to an amicable reception by the other involved party. I do think talking, a lot of it, would’ve prevented the issue from worsening but we humans can’t be expected to always be rational in a relationship. Ah, I just want to pat the both of them in their heads though, I feel sad for them.

Lastly, thank you for writing so realistically and impeccably, for the lack of better term. You and your friend’s little banter at the end is cute, hehe. I’ll be patiently waiting for the next update.
gomikigai #9
Chapter 4: I just want to hug both of them
eunxiaoxlove #10
Chapter 3: :(
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