I sat there. In a bar. Quite empty, there’s only a couple people here. The leather bar stool was luxurious. The alcohol served are expensive. People who pass by are dressed in a tux, coming after their  work shift is over. Meanwhile I’m the only one in jeans and a jacket. 

He serves me a cocktail on the house with a chiseled piece of ice inside the cup; served with a cherry on top and flashes his charming smile. I flash a smile back and thanked him. I come too this bar too often. Spending my money on alcohol and to see him. It’s really to the point that he gives me free drinks. I suppose I don’t mind. I could waste my money else where. 

He knows what drink I order. Everyday at the same time, he already has the drink ready for me. After midnight, my drinks become free. No, I wouldn’t take advantage of it. I stay to talk to him. By the time it’s empty, I’m sorrowfully drunk. But at this time, we’re able to talk. He stays cleaning the glass cups and listens to me. His smile charms me and he looks at me when talking. His voice is smooth like honey. Sometimes he’ll put on music and just sing to pass by the time. 

He’s a great singer. His eyes give a little sparkle when he smiles and when he laughs it’s like a beautiful melody. He’ll stay until I get tired. He closes the bar for the night and always drives me to my apartment.

Although I’m tired, I’m thankful. I’ll place a kiss on his forehead and bid farewell before closing the door and stumbling to my bed. The curtains are always open. I’ll lay in bed and look out the window, a perfect view to see the sky and city. And I’ll look to the moon. 

And as I lay, I’ll recite the lyrics quietly to myself:

‘I know, you’re somewhere far away. The night when the blue star lights me up in the room, lean on the window. Wait for the clouds to wobble in the wind. When the full moon gets an eclipse in my submerge pupil...talking to the moon, stay up all night with my eyes open. Talking to the moon, maybe you’ll see the moon and talk to me. I expect like a fool, try to call you but cannot reach. Please.. someday when you listen to my voice in your dreams, open your lips, don’t hesitate to answer. I miss you too.’

After this my eyes will be consumed by darkness and drift into an abyss of nothingness. Until the next day, I’ll be awaken around ten am. It’s a rainy day today. I don’t have work. I don’t work often. The money in my account automatically transfer because of my social status. work. 

I’m still in the clothes I was in last night, so after washing up I’ll go to my fridge. I don’t eat a lot. My fridge is practically empty. All I do is grab a fruit and drink some water before leaving the apartment.

On days like this, I’ll go to the coffee shoppe. He works part time. Part time here and part time in the bar. I only show up in the coffee shoppe on rainy days. The bells on the door will ring as I walk in I know he’d smile as soon as he sees me walk in. 

Greeted with a smile, he has my warm drink prepared already. He knows my whole schedule. He’s the only one who knows me. 

I’ll sit in the corner of the shoppe, by the window and look out. Every drop that falls is a tear on a larger scale. Some people love it, some people hate it. When the rain falls, it reminds me of him. They’re the days I’ll spend more time around him. 

After half the day is over, we’ll walk together to the bar a block away. Somedays we talk..somedays we listen to the rain that falls on the umbrella. Today we didn’t speak at all. When we arrived I sat in my usual spot. 

He went on with his day, serving other customers who came by the day. Around eleven, the bar began to clear up. Today I didn’t drink as much. I won’t be drunk tonight. He asked if I was alright. He asked if I wanted some water. He asked if I’ve eaten. I said yes to all of them. He smiled and it made me full. He smiled and I think I was alright. He smiled I wasn’t too thirsty.

 he smiled.

Tonight we didn’t talk much. He sang for most of the night. I wasn’t tired at all but around two am, he looked at me and asked, ‘am I special to you?’

And all I could give was a shrug. He only nodded. He was done cleaning all the cups and began to practice chiseling ice to keep him busy. And he asked another question. ‘Do you think you’re special to me?’ And again.. only another shrug. He smiles and shakes his head and I could only smile back in response with a light chuckle. 

He was a couple years older than me. He lived a simple life quite like me. We’ve been doing this for four years now. 

Today he leaned on the counter and looked at me. He smiled. His eyes sparkled and his smile was warm. He asked me another question. ‘You know I won’t ever be him, right?’ 

My lips parted slightly, with half a smile and nodded as a tear fell from my eyes. If only he knew. 

Today he took me home as always. Today when he took me to my apartment door, instead of giving a kiss on his forehead and thanking him, he kissed me. He bid farewell. That night I walked to the bed and stared out the window as tears streamed my face. 

That night he told me. ‘I remember everything. I can’t stay anymore. I love you. Thank you for staying with me until my last day.’

The next day I woke up at ten am. And it rained. Off to the coffee shoppe and I missed his smile. Later I walked to the bar and missed the night with him. Today I went home alone. I remember the day we met he told me he didn’t like to grow attached to anyone. That day he told me he’d lost a memory of someone. The day he told me he had a certain amount of time before he’d leave. 

The day he remembers is his day to leave. I loved him. For ten years. He made a promise to himself to not fall because he had to leave and I was forgotten. His smile remains in our photo-book.

Days on end I lived quietly until I laid in a bed of flower petals. And I remember he told me to stay for him. So I did. 

Fin.

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A/n:  i hope ya enjoyed this angsty au. If you got this far, thank you— oh yes and plz gimme feedback on this