[1/1]

Baekhyun could have been gulping down one drink after another now, swinging his hips to loud, overwhelming music and rubbing his body against the one's of a stranger, but instead he stood in front of the immense mansion of the Kim's, a cigarette in between the pink of his lips as he digested the nicotine. It slowly ran down his lungs, painting it with its bitter taste.

He dragged it in for the last time before flickering the cigarette ash onto the rigid ground. The brown of his orbs was chained to the darkness, his gaze fixated on the gloom of the night, only the streetlamp's neon light hitting him and dazzling his features. A sigh escaped his lips as he turned his body towards the entrance door. It's time for work.

Baekhyun led his hand to the doorbell, pressing his thump against it as he his lips. The bitter taste was still glued on them, but all he could focus on was the door. He could have been at a damn party right now, but no, he had to do this babysitting job to earn money for college.

It wasn't like he hated the Kim's, he actually even liked their adorable little children and Mr and Mrs. Kim, but all his friends were having a good time at Jongin's party while he had to babysit the entire night. And this meant, the children would already be sleeping in their beds tightly while Baekhyun's eyes would be fixated on the screen of the TV, waiting for the Kim's to come back and drive him home safely.

The door creaked open, Mrs Kim's kind face greeting him with a wide smile before welcoming him into the warmth of their immense mansion. It wasn't his first time seeing their house, but his eyes widened every freaking time when they would get a glimpse of its beauty, roaming over the white, clean walls and all the expensive decor .Wow."It could take longer today, but there's some food in the kitchen, so feel free to eat whenever you are hungry, okay?"

He smiled. "Of course, Mrs Kim. Thank you." She sent him another smile, running her hand over the raven of her hair while Baekhyun glanced at the tight, red dress she was wearing. Baekhyun wasn't swinging that way, but the woman in front of him was beautiful, maybe even breathtaking. Way more beautiful than women her age. "You look stunning today, Mrs Kim."

"Aw,really? I wasn't sure about that dress. You don't think it's too much?"

"No, it's perfect, don't worry. Mr Kim won't stop drooling."

She giggled, swinging a jacket over her shoulders. "I hope so. I didn't get ready for nothing, right?"

"Right." A chuckle left his lips, amusement lingering in his voice. "Oh,the kids are sick so they'll probably be sleeping the entire night.But if they wake up just read them something and they'll immediately fall asleep again."

"Oh, okay." She smiled for the last time before walking to the door."And don't forget to put the password for the security system."

"I won't, Mrs Kim. Have a good night."

"Thank you, Baekhyun." With that the door closed, Baekhyun still standing in the hall, staring at it with a light smile plastered on his face. The security system, right. His feet found their way to the keyboard of the security system, his fingers dancing on them. 6554. A light sound echoed in his ears, telling him that it was now activated successfully.

And what now?

He looked around the in white covered hall as he walked through it,right into the living room. The walls were also painted in white but the furniture was all crimson and golden, giving it an elegant but unique touch. They had style, for sure. On the right side of the living room stairs were located , which would lead up to children's room and on the right side, directly next to the stairs an immense kitchen. Everything in this house was just perfection, but still, there was one thing which bothered Baekhyun. The windows, way too many windows were surrounding the house.

Baekhyun didn't know why, but it showered him with a strange discomfort. Maybe it was the fact that someone could actually look through those windows. No, they live in the middle of nowhere,no human soul comes to this area. He shook his head, sitting down on the immense couch with a sigh.

He leaned his head on the edge of the couch, looking up to the ceiling. Baekhyun wondered what his friend were doing at this very moment. Probably drinking themselves to an alcohol poising. A snort escaped his lips as he moved his head up again, grabbing the iPhone6 out of the pockets of his jeans.

6 New messages

He bit his lips, discomfort suddenly overcoming him. I bet it's him again. Baekhyun sighed, leading his head to the messages symbol but stopped directly above it. No, you don't want to see them. Ignore him, Baekhyun. Just ignore him. He closed his eyes for a moment of silence before opening them again and drifting his fingers to the adressebook, right to Luhan's number.

"Come on, pick up," he mumbled, as the phone's sound kept echoing in his ears.

"Heeey,Baek~"Baekhyun chuckled, listening to his friend's voice which wasn't really clear due to the overwhelming music-float. "Are you drunk already?"

"Nooo,o..of course I'm not."

"Ya, sure. You sound very sober to me." A sound suddenly echoed in his ears, his eyes meeting the stairs for a moment of silence, but after awhile he decided that it probably came from the other line."You know who's here?"

Baekhyun stiffened, taking a sharp breath. Don't say his name please."I don't want to know, Lu-"

"No, I was talking about Kris.. but ya, he's here too."

Oh. He bit his lips, not exactly sure whom he should think about. His current crush or his abusive ex. "He asked why you didn't come you know, I mean Kris, of course."

His eyes widened, but the discomfort was still covering his body. He liked Kris, but everything was just physical, he liked his appearance, the smirk glued on his lips whenever he looked at him and how he ran his large hand through the raven of his hair only to seduce the smaller. Kris maybe thought he didn't know, but Baekhyun knew, every little detail.

"Maybe I should tell him your address then you guys could-"

"No. Please, Lu. Just don't.. I'm not ready." An explosion of music drained his ears as he laid down on the couch, twirling the brown of his hair around his finger. "You'll never be ready if you keep thinking about him, Baek. He hurt you, let go finally."

He hurt you. Baekhyun closed his eyes again, his arm dropping to the side next to him as he fell into the deepest of his thoughts.

Baekhyun had never believed in love at first sight but Chanyeol's appearance somehow convinced him from the opposite. The first time they had met was the day Luhan had forced me to watch the play of their school's basketball-team and Chanyeol coincidentally happened to be the leader of the group.

He normally hated such sport plays, but on that day he was strangely enjoying it. Enjoying how the taller threw those seductive stares at him whenever their eyes met, an oh so attractive half-smile playing on the corner of his lips. He fell in love that day, hard and deep, not knowing in what he had gotten himself into.

–He couldn't know how dangerous the said boy actually was.

Everything happened so damn fast and one week later they already shared their very first kiss, which felt so so right. Chanyeol's taste was still glued on his lips whenever he thought about the taller, or when his name left someone's lips. Oh god, how much he wanted to feel it again. A few days later Chanyeol made him his and it was probably the best night of Baekhyun's life. He had never felt so loved, so adored, so perfect. He whispered sweet nothings into his ears, kissing him just right and filling his entire stomach with butterflies. He was the one. He really thought Chanyeol was the one, the one with whom he would get old and wrinkled. His first and last love.

It didn't take long until they became boyfriends, the very first I love yous ghosting in the air. And Baekhyun felt like he was on cloud 9, being the happiest he had ever been. But he was wrong, oh so wrong.

He couldn't know what was hidden within the deepest of the taller's soul. Something dark and abusive, which showed up for the first time after a month in their relationship. Chanyeol got possessive, really possessive and in one day Chanyeol appeared at Baekhyun's, drunk and turbulent. Baekhyun immediately knew something was wrong, so he insisted Chanyeol to come in, trying to call Sehun to pick him up,but Chanyeol was too strong. – He had always been. And one moment later he was showed against the coldness of the wall, a pain rushing through his body as Chanyeol's hard breath was hitting his cheeks.For the very first time he didn't feel safe around Chanyeol, for the very first time he was scared, scared of the love of his life.

And then he hit him. Right into his stomach as Baekhyun collapsed onto the floor, tears escaping his eyes. He could still recall his hard words, a bunch of and s leaving his lips. The reason for his outburst was apparently the skinship he had shared with Jongin the day before. It was a hug, a small hug,nothing intimate or special, but Chanyeol seemed to saw something more in it.

After hitting him, he stumbled onto the floor next to him, whispering I'm sorry for a hundred times before pulling him into his arm and covering him with kisses, and Baekhyun was dumb enough to let him. Even after that he decided to stay with him, thinking maybe this was a one time thing.. But it wasn't.

The problem was just Baekhyun was so in love, even after all the abuse he couldn't let go of Chanyeol. He couldn't imagine a life without the taller, so he stayed by his side.

If it wasn't Luhan who had forced him to stay away from Chanyeol then he would probably be abused at this very moment, being caught in Chanyeol's strong hold.

In the end he had to let go, somehow, but he didn't know how. And here he was, trying to move on with Kris, the boy he had convinced himself to have a crush on, but in reality he probably didn't because every time he looked at Kris he saw no one but Chanyeol.

He opened his eyes again, a deep breath leaving his lips. The music had stopped on the other line, signalizing him that Luhan had already hung up. How long was I caught in my thoughts? Baekhyun sat up on the couch, glancing to the stairs for a moment of silence. Seems like they're still sleeping. He sighed in relief, staring at the display of his phone, directly at the message button.

9 New messages

No. Don't open. You can't open them. Stay strong, Baekhyun.

"I'm such a mess," he mumbled, leading a hand through the mess which was his hair before placing his phone on the white, wooden table in front of him. Leave my head finally. A sigh escaped his lips, his body moving up and heading to the kitchen in a slow pace. Maybe I should eat something to make the time pass faster. His hand found its way to the handle of the fridge,opening it with a yawn coming out of his lips.

The fridge opened, a bunch of food appearing right in front of his very eyes. The strange thing was just, the hunger inside of him had suddenly vanished. Vanished into the thin air. He closed the fridge after grabbing a coke dose, walking back to the couch as he led the dose to his lips, sipping it down gulp for gulp.It ran down his throat slowly, providing him with a cold feeling allover his body. He grabbed the remote control turning on the TV before switching it right to a comedy movie he had never seen before.

But yet again, the interest on the movie faded in minutes, his eyes eyeing the phone on the wooden table. I really want to open the texts.

And then without thinking twice he grabbed his phone with a tremble,staring right into the display for a moment of silence as a thousand of thoughts were running through his mind. Do you really want to open them? Yes.

His hand drifted to the message button, clicking on it in a slow pace, oh so slow. He breathed out sharply, his whole body shaking by now. He was so nervous, so damn nervous. Every vein in his body seemed to be frozen, an overwhelming coldness covering him and then his eyes hit them. His texts.

From:Don't answer
Baekhyun, let's talk. I miss you.

From:Don't answer
I can't stand how Kris keeps looking at you,Baekhyun.. Look I know I've made mistakes, a lot actually, but I still love you and I can change. Please. Give me a second change.

From:Don't answer
Baekhyun..I know you're reading my messages.Reply please.

From:Don't answer
How can you already move on with someone else while my heart is broken in a thousand pieces?

From:Don't answer
I hate myself. I hate myself so damn much, but I still love you. I'll never stop loving you..

A tear hit the screen suddenly, soaking the rest of the messages. Enough. Baekhyun's face was covered in tears now, his heart was ripped into the half as he felt like he was suffocating, no oxygen entering his lungs. You're such an . He closed his eyes to stop his tears but they just didn't want to stop rolling. And I still happen to love this .

A sound suddenly penetrated his ears, pulling him back into reality in just milliseconds. He looked up to the source of the sound, right to the house-phone of the Kim's. Baekhyun immediately wiped the tears from his face, running as fast as possible to pick it up.

"Hello,Mr and Mrs Kim children's babysitter here."

"Did you cry?" He stiffened, the deep, oh so familiar voice filling his mind. No, it can't be h- "You cried, right?"The breath was stuck in his lungs as his heart was beating against his ribcage in a fast pace, way too fast. "H-How the hell do you know this number?"

"I know everything about you, Baek." He forced a deep breath to penetrate his lungs, his whole body shaking like crazy as a chill began to cover his skin, providing him with goosebumps. He sounds drunk.

"I need to see you. Now."

"No.Just leave me alone finally." He hung up as fast as he picked up the call, falling down on the ground in exhaustion. A storm of tears floated his face, his body jerking insanely. "A-."Baekhyun led his hand to his heart, feeling its fast beat. "Why.."

"Why are you doing this to me?" Talking seemed so difficult, words leaving his lips but way too little oxygen entering his system.I want to hate you. Why can't I-

A knock suddenly hit his ears, his body stiffening once again. He held his breath, sitting there in total silence for a moment. Mr and Mrs. Kim wouldn't knock. His blood ran cold as another knock echoed in the deepest of his eardrums, providing him with horrific shivers all over his skin.

He slowly, carefully, stood up, walking to the hall as he glanced to the glass entrance door. No one to be seen. He breathed out in relief, but it faded as soon as the home phone rang another time, making the blood in his veins freeze. What,what is going on? Baekhyun ran, ran to open the phone with a fast beating heart. "Hello, Mr and Mrs.Kim-"

"Let me in, Baekhyun." A horrendous fear made its way to Baekhyun's body, covering him like a second skin. He was shaking, more than usual, more than he ever did before. Oh my god, how did he know where I-

"I know everything about you, Baekhyun." He walked forward, right to a spot where he could see the entrance door, the breath still stuck in his lungs. "Why are you doing this to me.. Stop Chanyeol, you have to stop please."

"No.Not until we have talked."

"You scare me." A moment of silence followed as Baekhyun kept staring at the door, a thousand of thoughts running through his already crowded mind.

"Good."Baekhyun froze on his spot, a coldness showering his body in a millisecond.W-what?"Let me in or I'll come in forcefully."

"Please,don't do this to me Chanyeol.. Please, let me move o-"

"No.We're destined for each other, Baekhyun. We have to be together..Forever." He took a deep breath, still eyeing the door with wide eyes.

"We used to, but our forever vanished as you started to abuse me."

"It was a mistake-"

"A mistake you did over and over again?" He didn't notice, but the tears were escaping his already swollen eyes once more. "I can't do this anymore Chanyeol. You.." he sniffled, trying to stop himself from crying but it didn't want to work. "You have to let me move on.Please, i-if you.. love me." He lowered his voice when the word' love' touched his lips. This wasn't love anymore, this was obsession. "No one moves on. Let me in,Baekhyun. I'll say this for the last time."

"But we're already talking-"

"I need to see you." No. You won't come in. He wiped the tears from his face but they kept running. "I'll hang up now. You're obviously drunk, so go home. You need to get some rest."

"All I need is you." Baekhyun couldn't help but feel butterflies covering his stomach. He didn't want to, but he couldn't stop himself from loving the taller. He couldn't let go.. not as long as Chanyeol wouldn't let him.

"I'm hanging up." And without waiting for the other to utter another word, he hung up, taking a deep breath as he was still clenching the homephone in his hand. His eyes were still glued on the door, the tension in his body increasing with every passing second. And somehow every second felt like a minute.

He drifted his eyes to his phone as he bit his lips harshly, a thought popping up in his head. No, I can't call the police.. I can't do this to Chanyeol, but I could call dad. Baekhyun eyed the door again before sprinting to the place where his phone was placed,grabbing it in a killing pace and running back to the spot where he could see the door the best. Everything is the same.

The brunet's fingers danced on the screen of his phone, right to his dad's number. The phone was pressed against his ears as his eyes were fixated on the door, eyeing it carefully. Did he just want to scare me?

"Baekhyun?"

"Dad, you have to-"

And then, suddenly the alarm went off, a loud sound penetrating his ears. The . His phone was still pressed against his ears as he ran towards the security system turning it off in order to escape the sound. . But, he glanced back at the door, noticing that nothing had changed. It was still closed. Maybe it went off by mistake.

"Baekhyun? What's going on?!" The kids .

"Uhm..I.. I'll call you in a minute dad."

"Baekhyun,Wait-" He hung up, putting his phone on a table near to the security system as he walked up the stairs in a killing pace, opening the door to the twin's room, oh so carefully, but luckily both were still tightly asleep, laying in their beds peacefully. They haven't woken up. What a relief. A sigh escaped the brunet'slips as he closed the door again, moving down to the living room while a thought reached his mind. He didn't recall turning on the security system again. Oh .

An uncomfortable silence was hovering above him as he moved his feet downstairs, heading to the security system with a hard breath and nervousness creeping through his body. 6554. His hand was shaking as they danced over the keyboard of the security system. Something felt different. — Something felt wrong all of a sudden.

And then he noticed the change. His phone, his phone was gone.

He held his breath, glancing at the door with wide eyes. He is here. He is inside. His entire body was shaking as he had just seen a ghost, discomfort showering his entire being. The housephone. He was scared, scared to move but he squeezed his fists into balls, biting his lips harshly before sprinting into the living room as fast as he could. Angry and drunk Chanyeol wasn't a good combination at all. He had to be dangerous in this state, very dangerous,and somehow he feared the taller more than he had ever before.

His hand touched the house phone but all the hope left his body as fast as it entered his body. No signal.

What the .

The housephone then kissed the floor, his jerking body crunched down onto the floor in shook. He laid his hands to his head as he wanted nothing more but leave, leave fast and don't look back, but he couldn't. He didn't know if the kids would be safe around Chanyeol..not anymore.

At this point, he should have probably dialed the police's number,but the didn't. He couldn't, he couldn't do this to Chanyeol. He just couldn't put the other behind bars, maybe it was the explosion of love floating inside of him, but the thought of Chanyeol in handcuffs provided him with teary eyes. He was such a mess.

A mess for someone who had hurt him so many times..

The thing was just he couldn't just shut it off, the love inside of him had already possessed him like an evil demon. Chanyeol had already gotten under his skin, marking Baekhyun's soul and forbidding him to ever forget the taller.

Who had thought that his very first love would end that way. Baekhyun clearly didn't conclude with all of this.

Just then, when he was still caught in his thoughts, a light sounded hit his ears, pulling him back into reality with an inhale. His body froze, his eyes widening in horror as he realized what this sound was. Footsteps. Closer and closer, in a slow pace, oh so slow, as he fell mute, still glued on the spot he had been. Move Baekhyun. But somehow he couldn't. Somehow, no muscle in his body wanted to react or escape the panic-stricken situation he was caught in. The footsteps got louder and Baekhyun stopped breathing. Now or never.

But instead of moving he suddenly felt like falling. He fell,fell deep into an endurable darkness. A darkness he had never felt before,right into unconsciousness.

Maybe it had been the fear which led him into the darkness, but all he knew was that he preferred the darkness over the horror creeping through every vein in his body.

"Wake up Baekkie~" His eyes were heavy, his eyelids stone-hard. What..What happened? He struggled to open his eyes as pain found its way to his body. This voice. This deep voice- And then it hit him. Chanyeol,Chanyeol "Welcome back Baekkie." His eyes adjusted on the dim light, Chanyeol's face appearing in front of his very eyes. "I missed your face,"he whispered, Baekhyun's entire body freezing with a single breath.

It was difficult to explain the explosion of emotions increasing in his body at very moment, but one thing he knew for sure, he had missed him too. Chanyeol suddenly chuckled, sitting down on the floor in front of Baekhyun as the other flinched, fear overcoming him.

He just stared in silence, watching how the other looked at him with this seductive look he used to have, and it immediately he was pulled back into all those old memories. The only thing was, this time it was different. There was a darkness hidden within his raven orbs, a dangerous darkness he had never seen before. Not even when he had abused him.

The taller suddenly ran a hand through the other's chocolate-brown hair as he stiffened under his touch, closing his eyes in fear. He couldn't help but feel love and fear at the same time. "I didn't mean it when I said 'good', I don't want you to be scared of me. I- I just want us to go back. To be Baekhyun and Chanyeol again."

At this point Baekhyun couldn't utter a word nor move a single finger.The fear in his system had reached its , painting his skin with goosebumps. He was scared, scared of Chanyeol.

"Let's go back to how things have been, Baekhyun." The surface of Chanyeol's hand touched his cheeks, his body increasing the temperature in his body. He has to play along. He's drunk, if he doesn't play along he'll hurt him.. and even worse he may hurt the kids.

"I-I missed you too." And this wasn't even a lie. Baekhyun missed him more than anything, his warm embrace, all the kisses they used to share and the sweet nothings hitting his ears. He missed Chanyeol.

"Don't worry, we're together now." Chanyeol grabbed his arm, pulling him into the warmth of his embrace as Baekhyun stiffened. One the one hand he was scared, but on the other hand he felt like crying. He missed this so damn much.

"Let me in Baekhyun. Let me into your heart again." And then it happened, he couldn't hold back anymore. Tears filled his eyes and covered his face with wetness. His entire world froze at the very place, pulling him back into all those beautiful moments they had shared. You never left anyway.

Chanyeol ran a hand through the softness of Baekhyun's hair as the other continued sobbing into the taller's shirt. "I love you. I love you so much."

I love you too, more than I should, but this, this can't happen. A sound suddenly pulled him back into reality, his whole body jerking out of Chanyeol's embrace. The kids, they've waken up. "Oh god, the . Why do they have to wake up n-"

"I'll just put them back to sleep, okay? I'll be back." Chanyeol looked annoyed and that was a bad sign, a sign he couldn't allow to ignore. The one Baekhyun had fallen in love with wasn't a violent person, but there was someone else hidden within the taller, and this someone made him into something he was not. And in this state, he would do anything. Even hurt little children.

"Be fast." He nodded, moving his feet up the stairs to the voices penetrating his ears. The kids, I have to hide them somewhere. Slowly, very carefully, he opened the door to the children's room, sending a smile towards the twins who looked up to him through the darkness. "Hyuuug? Where's emmoa~"

"She'll be here so Junho. But let's play a game until she comes, okay?"

Jinho glanced at him, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "A game?"

"Ya, you'll hide and I find you, okay? But you have to be quiet, very quiet." The kids looked at each for a moment of silence before nodding at the same time. "Okay. We'll hide hyung. You'll never find us!"

I hope so. He chuckled as he stood up, walking back to the door. "I'll going downstairs and count to ten, okay?"

"Okay!"And with that he closed their door, letting out a sharp breath. Please, be quiet please.

"Baekhyun?"He stiffened, the deepness of Chanyeol's voice providing him with shivers. "I-I'm coming."

As soon as he had reached Chanyeol he was pulled back into the other's embrace, his strong cologne filling Baekhyun's nostrils and leading him into arousal. Suddenly, he fell into the ground, his back leaned against the hard wall as he felt the taller's tongue against his throat. He held his breath in shock, closing his eyes tightly. Let me move on Chanyeol.. Please.. Or I'll fall back into your arms. And again tears were touching his cheeks, painting them with its wetness.

"Don't cry. Your eyes are already red." Chanyeol whipped the tears from Baekhyun's smile, but this just made him cry even more. Stop,please. Let me hate you. "Everything will change if you give me a second chance." Lies.

Don't believe him, Baekhyun. Don't let him pull you into a delusion.

He has to escape. Now. "C-Chanyeol,the Kim's are about to come. You have to go p-" Suddenly he held him with his huge and pale, very pale, hands, pulling him even closer. When the movement stopped he was seated in the other's lap."You'll run away from me, if I let go of you." I will."I won't."Chanyeol glanced at him with those wide, puppy-like eyes which made his heart almost go weak, but just almost. He had to let go, not fall deeper.

Just as Chanyeol's intense, arousal cologne filled his nose, the door's bell echoed in his ears. His blood immediately ran cold, his heart stopping to beat in his chest. Who- "Who the is that know?!" Chanyeol hissed, the lowness of his voice got two octaves lower as Baekhyun started to get shivers on his entire skin.Oh no. "I-I'll look who it is and you stay here, okay?"

Chanyeol stayed mute for a second, staring at the smaller with a frown. Chanyeol looked like he was caught in his thoughts deeply, a furious expression plastered on his face. It almost was like a smog of anger was boiling out of him.

His body was shaking like crazy as he arrived at the door, the breath stuck in his lungs when he saw the person standing behind the glass entrance door. Kris. The taller smiled widely as Baekhyun closed the door a little bit, so that Chanyeol wouldn't be able to see the boy's features. "Hey, Baek."

"Why are you here?" He broke into sweat, his heart pounding against his chest in a killing pace. He was nervous, so damn nervous. Baekhyun couldn't allow Chanyeol to get a glimpse of the taller.

"Luhan told me this address and I thought I could help you a litt-"

"No.You have to go Kris.. Now." Kris eyes grew wider as Baekhyun bit his lips, stomping his feet against the floor. Chanyeol is going to notice. "Baekhyun? What's wrong? Is someone in there-"

"No.Just go," Baekhyun said, louder than intended before forcing a smile on his nervous face. "Baekhyun, please. You don't look well-"

"I said no. Good bye, Kris." And with that he closed the door at the other's face, his whole body trembling in pure horror. His eyes were still threatening to burst forth from his ribcage when here turned into the living room, only to be greeted by Chanyeol, who was sitting on the couch, looking up to him with those dark, blank eyes.

"Who was on the door?"

He gulped, the sweat increasing with every passing second. "J-Just a friend." Chanyeol drifted his sight from the smaller, looking at the ground as he ran a hand through the raven of his hair. He's boiling in anger, Baekhyun could literally see the flames coming out of his body.

"I asked who."

Baekhyun took a deep breath before fixating his sight on the floor. I can't say it's Kris. "Luhan. It was Luhan."

The taller his lips, a smirk appearing in the corner of his upperlip. He stood up sluggishly, Baekhyun's whole heart suddenly thumping way faster than a normal heart was supposed to, and in a rush all the abuse he had to experience flickered in front of his very eyes.

He had to endure so much violence, but still, he couldn't hate him. What is wrong with him? "Don't make me angry, babe."Chanyeol touched the firm of his navy-blue shirt. A cold breeze kissed his body, but showered him with a shuddering coldness. Every vein in his body froze and somehow breath didn't want to enter his lungs anymore.

"I don't like lies, you know that."

And suddenly Baekhyun stumbled onto the rocky ground, a strange metallic-like liquid suddenly entering his cavern. His lips kissed the, with dirt covered, ground, dusk sticking onto them. A stabbing pain overcoming his every vein, pounding inside of him as tears started to shed its way down his face.

It wasn't pain which turned him to a crying mess, but love.No matter how many times Chanyeol would hurt him, he just couldn't seem to grow hate. Every hit would fade in his mind, eaten by the love flaming in his body. I don't want to love you.

But I can't stop.

"Baekhyun-"The smaller began to sob harder, his body pressed against the hardness of the floor as no breath seemed to be entering his lungs. I have to escape from him. — Before it's too late

And with that he stood up in a killing pace. The pain was still rushing through his body, fast, faster than it had ever before, but at the moment he didn't care. He needed to run in order to save his heart.So he did, his feet moving up on their own, up the stairs before slipping into the children's room. He took a deep, long breath as he locked the door behind himself while tears continued to storm down his face.

One tear after another and soon he was soaked in tears once again.

"Baekhyun! Baby, please. Open that door." He slid down the wooden door,sobs echoing through the entire room, and suddenly a thought made its way to his mind. The kids.

The tears froze on his face, his eyes roaming around the dark room he was caught in. Where could they be? His eyes met their half open closet, a smile appearing on his tear-stained face. He moved up in a slow pace, walking towards the closet, only to see the twins sleeping inside of it, Jinho's shoulder touching the one's of Junho.

They're already asleep. He smiled lightly, thuds continuing to hit his ears in a constant mantra. Baekhyun closed his eyes for a moment of silence, taking a deep breath before tugging both into the bed again. They'll wake up if Chanyeol keeps hitting his fist against the door.

"Baby..Please, let me in." The brunet stayed mute, leading his hand towards his mouth to soften the sobs leaving his lips. Just go. Go finally. He walked back to the door in a slow pace, putting his hand directly against the wood of the door as he fell down onto the floor. "Yeol.." The brunet was so exhausted at this point, so that his voice was unclear and dizzy.

"Baek,"the other now said as the thuds stopped. He sighed, leading his head against the door as he closed his eyes. Chanyeol voice immediately pulled him back into a colorful trance. It was like they were in their very own world.

"You..You said you hate me that day, were you serious?" Hate you? He chuckled. How can I hate you? Sadly, that'snot possible.

"No. I needed to get away from you.."

"Understandable...Look Baby-"

"No.Let's not please." Baekhyun breathed out sharply, squeezing his eyes to a thin line as sadness started to float him. The atmosphere was suddenly eaten by an immense silence, his heart beating against his chest while his thoughts were chained to all the things that had happened lately.

Their relationship wasn't healthy at all, no, it was probably the unhealthiest relationship he had ever been, but still, Baekhyun didn't seem to care. Their love was so overwhelming, like they're each other's oxygen, the stars on their pitch-black night sky.

– Baekhyun needed him to breathe.

" Do you remember our very first date?" Baekhyun blinked, the behind of his head touching the wooden door. "We went to this amusement park and you ended up throwing up," a chuckle left the taller'slip as Baekhyun was caught deep in his thoughts. I remember every single second of it. "And you insisted on walking, so I had to carry you the whole way home."

A tear ran down Baekhyun's face as his expression was suddenly washed with sadness. "You felt so amazing in my arms, like they're made to carry you..It probably sounds strange, but that day I decided to never let go of you again.. Protect you with all my strength but suddenly I'm the one from whom you had to be protected." More tears ran down his face, hiccups mixed in between his sobs.

"Isn't it ironic? From all the people it's me."

"And now here we are.. You hiding from me." From you? It felt like a sharp knife made its way through his heart, a crushing pain floating his chest. No.

"I'm not hiding from you. I want to escape the stabbing pain of my heart."

A moment of silence followed, their breaths sticking in the oxygen filled air as a thousand thoughts penetrated his mind.

His heart was thumping in a fast pace, and no matter what Chanyeol would do, the speed of his heart's beating wouldn't change. It would be him forever. But he had to let go.

"Actually..I only said it to make you carry me," Baekhyun whispered, a light smile glued on his teary face. "It was only our first day but I had this strange urge to be close to you.. I had never felt like this before.."

"Baekhyun-"

"Let me finish please." He took a sharp breath, trying to wipe the tears from his face, but they just kept storming down his face. "That day I sat on my bed with a fast beating heart and a wide smile on my face. I couldn't fall asleep due to all the butterflies floating my stomach. I realized how much I had already fallen for you and even though I knew this was way too fast I couldn't hold myself from falling deeper."

"But, I also knew that what we have can be dangerous.. that it can turn toxic," he breathed out heavily, whipping the tears from his face once more. "Our relationship is toxic Chanyeol. None of us can be happy if this goes on. Never."

"Baekhyun don't say such things-"

"It's the truth."

Not only was Baekhyun's heart broken, but also his entire soul. They weren't destined for each other, no, they were two pole sides which should have never met in the first place. Day and night.

They should have never exchanged those glances that day.

— But it was too late. They were already way too deep into this river of tears and heartbreaks. For them there was no going back anymore. No going back.

Baekhyun cried into his hands, thinking about everything they had experienced.All those beautiful memories, all this happiness. Will it be gone?

Maybe now was the time to move on. Maybe it was ti-

As he was caught in his thoughts a deep sound penetrating his ears, overtoning his loud sobs. His heart shoot up within his second, his whole body jerking up. "C-Chanyeol?"

But instead of voices, hisses filled his eardrums. What is going on there? His hand found its way to the handle of the door,pushing it open in a killing pace.

He expected everything but he thought his eyes tricked him when he had to witness how Kris had pushed Chanyeol against the wall, a fist meeting the taller's face as Baekhyun stood there in total shock. W-What is he do-

"No! Stop!"

But Kris didn't, another fist hit Chanyeol's face, tears rolling down his face with every passing second. No. He glanced into Chanyeol's bloody face, his heart breaking into a thousand pieces. Please.

"I told you to stop!" He collected all his power and stopped Kris from hitting him another time as he shoved the taller from Chanyeol's, his kissing the hard floor.

The thing was just Baekhyun didn't care. All he could see at very moment was Chanyeol's bloody face. Oh my god. This is my fault.

"The Baekhyun? He ing slapped you in the face and you let him?!"

He ignored Kris, staring at Chanyeol's face which was painted in blood."Baekhyun? Come on, he deserved it. Let's just-"

"Don't touch me." Baekhyun shoved Kris hand away with all his strength as a fire started to burn inside of him. This, this wasn't Kris business. None of this. Even if Chanyeol hurt him, even if.. He didn't deserve this. None of this.

"Baekhyun..please."

"Go the out of here."

The anger was suddenly gone, faded in the thinness of the air as the pain in his heart in increased with every breath entering the tip of his lips. An immense red mark was printed onto Chanyeol's cheek as his face was painted in crimson. Suddenly, the door fell shut,signalizing him that Kris had left.

"Does it hurt a lot?"

"N-No,"Chanyeol said, but Baekhyun knew that he lied. He had always been a bad liar. "Nothing could hurt me more than the thought of you leaving me."

He held his breath, staring right into the captivating darkness which was Chanyeol's orbs. Baekhyun was lost. Lost in his eyes.His forehead touched Chanyeol chest, printing his shirt with tears.

I don't want to. But.. we don't have another choice.

"I love you, and I'm sorry for hurting you. So many times.. I-"

"Let's not talk for now. Just a few minutes." Chanyeol stopped talking,an addicting silence suddenly surrounding them and a heat hugging their bodies.

He could hear the other's loud heartbeat through his thin shirt and it managed to calm his down like it used to. I love you too.

So so much. But this isn't healthy.

He inhaled Chanyeol's smell deeply, enjoying the hug like it was their very last one. — And maybe it really was. His hand clung on the taller's shirt, sobs escaping his lips once again. Our last hug.

After this I have to let go.

And suddenly their every single memory rushed in front of his eyes,providing him with an explosion of love. Thank you for showing me what love is. Thank you for making me feel so many beautiful things. Thank you for everything.

I love you so much.

But everything has an ending, right?

He opened his eyes again, and then, at this very moment, let go of Chanyeol, removing his own petite body from the raven-haired's hold.

This is our ending.

"You should go now."

"Baek-"

"Don't make it harder than it already is. Please Chanyeol. Go."

"Then,"Chanyeol grabbed the other's arm, pulling him closer again. "Let me at least kiss you.. for the last time." I can't handle a kiss, please.

But Chanyeol's lips were already on his before he could utter a single word. The kiss wasn't intimate nor passionate, but it was filled with love and especially despair.Despair for more, more than life could give them. More, so much more.

"If we cant be together in this life, we'll be in death I promise you.I'll wait for you no matter how long." Baekhyun didn't understand a single word leaving the taller's lips. But he could feel the taller's cologne fading into the thinness of the air, how his comforting heat was being replaced with coldness. A coldness the smaller had never felt before.

This was it? Baekhyun knew it would hurt but he didn't know it would be that painful. In this particular moment he had thought that he was experiencing the most painful thing he ever had to experience, but he was wrong, oh so wrong.

He didn't expect the leading events, he didn't expect to see Chanyeol's body stumbled onto the rigid ground, a river of blood soaking his clothes and a knife penetrating his stomach.

No,what he had felt then was the most painful thing he had ever experienced.

Chanyeol was brought into a hospital, Baekhyun's in exhaustion floated body found by Mr and Mrs Kim that night. His eyes were puffy from all the crying and his heart was ripped into a thousand pieces.

But finally Baekhyun understood Chanyeol's last words. He had planned to kill himself to wait for him in death, their relationship almost killed the love of his life. And again Baekhyun's words were proven.

Toxic.

From the very first moment their eyes had met to that day it was toxic.

Beautiful but toxic.

Chanyeol didn't die but that day was the last time they had ever exchanged a word. Baekhyun drove away, far away from Chanyeol in order to let him life.

— To let him breathe.

"Let me in Baekhyun. Let me into your heart again."

I don't have to let you in, because you'll always be in my heart.You'll always be a part of my life. — You already marked my soul with your love.

Soooo I don't know if you guys like it or not but writing this was an emotion rollercoaster for me