"Okay, but tell me why everyone here is so good-looking."

Jimin laughs at Taehyung's dilemma, shaking his head as he leads the both of them to Jimin's dance class. Taehyung wasn't meant to officially start his classes until tomorrow, so Jimin figured he'd let him tail him like a puppy, rather than have the latter lazing around their apartment, being unproductive and eating all their food.

"Oh, please. You're overreacting."

"Am I?"

"You haven't seen my literature professor yet, and I can probably name a few more faces that'll have you running in the opposite direction. So, yes, you are being too extra."

Now this has Taehyung snorting.

"You're such a ."

"But that's why you love me."

A few minutes of the usual bickering and catching up later, the two find themselves standing in front of the dance studio entrance. Jimin claimed to want to brace himself for the inevitable scolding he'd get from his dance instructor for being late, while Taehyung was off to the side, happily chatting with his mother, who had called sometime in between to check up on him and no doubt greet Jimin as well. 

"Okay. I will. Yes, mom. I know, I know. No unprotected . Bye. I love you, too."

"And me! I love you, too!"

Taehyung laughs at his mother's, "Of course. How could I forget. I love Jiminie, too," and hangs up after another series of questions she'd already asked.

"You ready?"

Taehyung raises an eyebrow at the question, seeing as Jimin was the one that was sweating bullets. 

"Are you?"

"Am I ready to get another lecture on my tardiness? Nope."

And with that, Jimin mutters a " it" and throws the door open. 

"6 minutes; that's a new record, Mr. Park."

Jimin puts on a sheepish smile, and instead of making up another excuse (which almost never works anyway), drags Taehyung along to go ask if he could stay for the class period.

Somewhere across the room among all the other dancers, who are busy stretching and chatting with each other, is a certain Jeon Jungkook, who has promptly forgotten how to function as a living, breathing human being. 

"Hello? Earth to Jungkook?"

"Hobi hyung, it's him," he says dazedly, completely ignoring the hand that's waving itself in his face.

Hoseok scans the room, unsure of who the younger was talking about. 

"Who?"

"Oh my god. Oh my god. He's coming this way. Act natural!"

By natural, Jungkook must've meant acting as awkward as possible, judging by how ing fast he went to lean stiffly against the studio mirror, looking like he had to take the biggest dump of his life. 

"What's up, Chim?" Hoseok greets first.

"Oh you know, the usual."

"You have to help clean the studio again, don't you?"

"Yup."

Hoseok just laughs and goes back to stretching out his body. He doesn't shift his attention away from the newcomer though, and he shoots Taehyung a blinding smile.

"Hi, I'm Jung Hoseok, a junior and dance major."

"Kim Taehyung, sophomore and math major."

Taehyung looks around then and sees a very familiar face.

"Hey, you're the cutie pie I saw earlier," Taehyung says when he spots Jungkook in all his awkward glory.

"Did the pictures turn out okay?"

His doe eyes are staring straight at him, and Jungkook actually chokes then and is desperately trying to find his voice again.

"They were amazing. High quality, too," Jimin answers for him before he could say something stupid.

"I'm glad. I was going to ask if you wanted me to pose or something, but you ran off before I could talk to you."

"I'm sorry. I should've asked before taking your picture."

Jungkook has long since abandoned his position against the wall and is now standing up straight, his eyes looking everywhere but at Taehyung.

"No, it's okay! I'm actually very flattered."

Taehyung's eyes suddenly meet Jungkook's, who has chosen that exact moment to get all choked up again, because oh my god, he's more ethereal up close.

By how prettily Taehyung's cheeks begin to take on that dusted pink color and how Jimin and Hoseok are (not) trying to hide their snorts and snickers, Jungkook can only plead for death to take him right then and there, cause he knows he said that out loud.

"Thank you," Taehyung says, smiling softly at the ground, clearly flustered and just looking like the softest baby boy Jungkook's ever seen.

 

Wow, I'm in love.

Taehyung's eyes are wide and his cheeks have gotten impossibly redder, and Jimin and Hoseok have completely lost it.

"I said that out loud, didn't I?"

~ ~ ~

Jimoan has changed the group name to "we're normal I swear"

Jimoan has changed their name to 'Jimmy'

Jimmy has changed 'Succjin''s name to 'Jinnie'

Jimmy has changed 'Moanie''s name to 'Joonie'

Jimmy has changed 'Jeoncock''s name to 'Kookie'

Jimmy has changed 'Tongue Technology''s name to 'Yoongz'

 

Kookie: What's with all the name changes?

Jimmy: I want to leave a good first impression of you guys on Taehyung 'n I can't do that if your users show you guys as some hormonal s

Hoebi: Why is mine still the same?

Jimmy: Cause you're actually a hoe

Hoebi: Fair enough

Jimmy: Everyone, please behave when Tae gets here

 

Jimmy has added 'Kim Taehyung' to the group

Jimmy has changed 'Kim Taehyung''s name to 'Taetae'


 

Taetae: So, which one is your daddy?

Jimmy: i'm going to kill you

Hoebi: loool we haven't even ed yet and I love you already

Jinnie: Hi! I'm Seokjin, but you can call me Jin. I'm a senior and a business major

Jinnie: also, please ignore Hoseok, he's just your everyday hoe

Hoebi: where's the lie?

Taetae: hello jin hyung! ^-^

Taetae: and ily 2 hoseok hyung <3

Jimmy: *le gasp*

Jimmy: what about me?? :(

Taetae: *gasp intensifies*

Taetae: i'm sorry, minnie! you know i love you way more than anyone else! even more than puppies and japchae!!

Taetae: forever

Taetae: ～(^з^)-♡

Jimmy: ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)

Jimmy: and always

Hoebi: you know what, i'm not even mad that i got one-upped by jimin so long as I CAN BE A WITNESS TO THIS DISPLAY OF PURE LOVE AND AFFECTION

Hoebi: SOMEONE PUNCH ME IN THE FACE

Jimmy: gladly

Taetae: but you might hurt yourself :(

Jimmy: sorry bby. I promise I won't beat up hobi hyung

Taetae: :D

Jinnie: ugh they're so ing adorable

Jimmy: the adorablest

Joonie: Hello. I'm Kim Namjoon, junior, and I major in music.

Taetae: hi!

Joonie: Also, I'm pretty sure "adorablest" isn't a word.

Yoongz: it is, if Jimin says it is

Taetae: ooh I found him

Taetae: hiya, daddy

Jimmy: Tae :))

Jinnie: *sipping tea*

Joonie: ...what?

Hoebi: umm

Yoongz: what the

Taetae: aren't you daddy yoongles?

Taetae: Pale skin? Majoring in music? Looks tough on the outside but is an actual teddy bear? Cutest gummy smile in the whole world?

Yoongz: uh, yes? Idk

Taetae: well, I just hope you know that I won't hesitate to castrate you if you ever make my Jimin cry :)

Hoebi: did anyone else get chills? pls tell me i'm not the only one that got chills

Joonie: I felt it in my nether regions.

Jinnie: Yoongi better watch out cause my newly adopted son is out for blood

Joonie: Since when did we get a new son?

Jinnie: since the moment tae came barreling into this chat with a bang and called out jimin's

Jimmy: i DO NOT have a

Yoongz: doesn't have to be yours, sweetheart

Hoebi: SOMEBODY HOLD MY CROISSANT BEFORE I DROP IT

Hoebi: DADDY YOONGLES IS BEING EXTRA BOLD TODAY

Jinnie: ILL HOLD YOUR DAMN CROISSANT IF YOU HOLD ME

Joonie: Excuse me, but that's my job.

Hoebi: OH EVEN NAMJOONS GOT HIS BIG BOY PANTS ON

Jinnie: I KNOW AND I LOVE IT

Joonie: I love you, too, darling <3

Jinnie: I never thought I'd see the day my Joonie would break out of his shell and be comfortable enough to express his love for me :')

Joonie: I'd do anything to show the world how much I love you.

Joonie: I'm just grateful that I managed to end up with someone as perfect as you, who loves me for who I am, even if sometimes I'm too shy to express that love back.

Jinnie: Namjoon, you're gonna make me cry

Joonie: Hopefully, that's a good sign?

Jinnie: it's my famous baked turkey on thanksgiving good

Joonie: Good. :)

Jimmy: you can't spell goals without namjin

Joonie: actually

Jinnie: don't ruin the moment, honey. just let the fun sized man compliment our relationship

Jimmy: i take back everything i said -3-

Jinnie: no take backs

Jinnie: sorry, i don't make the rules

 

~ ~ ~

Busan Boys Do It Better
 

tiny hyung: hey sweaty do you plan on avoiding the gc for the rest of your life?

bratty dongsaeng: shut up

tiny hyung: ohoho perhaps you're scared

bratty dongsaeng: scared of what?

tiny hyung: looking like an idiot in front of taehyung

bratty dongsaeng: i'm pretty sure i already achieved that earlier

tiny hyung: no way

tiny hyung: are you seriously beating yourself up because of that?

bratty dongsaeng: i could barely talk to him! and when I did, I outright confessed to him!

bratty dongsaeng: and now he probably thinks i'm a creepy loser

tiny hyung: i mean, sure you choked up a bit and you did take pics of him without his knowledge and you did confess your undying love to him, but tae thinks you're cute and , so it's fine

bratty dongsaeng: as if he'd find me cute

tiny hyung: he was literally sulking and whining about not getting to talk to you when you took his picture cause you're "so god damn fine"

tiny hyung: he also had actual heart eyes when you were stumbling for words to say to him

tiny hyung: and don't even get me started on how he reacted to that confession. two words: falling already

tiny hyung: so yeah he didn't explicitly say you're cute, but i know for a fact that he's very attracted to you

bratty dongsaeng: really?

tiny hyung: yes

bratty dongsaeng: really really?

tiny hyung: yesss ◔_◔

bratty dongsaeng: really really really?

tiny hyung: i'm going home

bratty dongsaeng: this is why you're fun to tease

tiny hyung: ya! you ungrateful brat

tiny hyung: here i am spoon feeding you my bff's honest feelings about you, and what do i get in return?

tiny hyung: DISRESPECT

tiny hyung: the least you could do is say a simple "thank you"

bratty dongsaeng: thank you, jimin hyung

tiny hyung: wow i didn't think i'd ever get this far in life

bratty dongsaeng: what? i can show some respect when i want to

tiny hyung: yeah but i'm kinda lost on what to do now

tiny hyung: i was planning on arguing for at least another few texts

bratty dongsaeng: gee, thanks for having so much faith in me

tiny hyung: you're welcome

tiny hyung: so you ready to finally say something in the gc?

bratty dongsaeng: i was hoping you could help me with that

tiny hyung: what? were you not saying anything cause you couldn't decide between a simple "hi" or "hey" lol

bratty dongsaeng: what? of course not! that's stupid!

tiny hyung: ...

bratty dongsaeng: ...

tiny hyung: you're a ing loser
 

~ ~ ~

we're normal i swear
 

Hoebi: speaking of no take backs, can we swerve away from the #1 OTP for a moment and go back to when yoongles just outright admitted to having to a and called jimin "sweetheart" cause I'm still not over it

Taetae: does yoongi hyung not call jimin pet names on the daily? or vice versa?

Jinnie: only if they're feeling extra risque

Hoebi: which happens to be lately

Taetae: i guess it's normal considering they're a new couple

Joonie: ...

Jinnie: w h a t

Taetae: well yeah it can be a little awkward at first when you're trying out pet names, but I'm sure they'll ease into it soon enough

Hoebi: guys, i think i'm hallucinating

Hoebi: i thought i just read taehyung type that yoongi and jimin

Hoebi: yoonmin

Hoebi: the two we've been shipping since the beginning of time

Hoebi: the two who were hopelessly pining for a thousand years

Hoebi: are dating???

Jimmy: oh my god

Yoongz: no comment

Taetae: did they... did they not know?

Jinnie: the we did

Joonie: This is the first we've ever heard of it.

Taetae: Jimin, I'm so so so so so sorry! I didn't know they didn't know!

Jimmy: Tae

Taetae: now I know why Yoongi hyung was so confused and I'm just really sorry

Jimmy: Taehyung

Taetae: I'm a terrible friend :(

Jimmy: Tae, baby, sunshine, my soulmate, the love of my life other than Yoongi hyung

Jimmy: it's okay

Taetae: no it's not. I just exposed you two when you were clearly keeping it a secret

Yoongz: Taehyung, we're not mad at you. I don't personally know you yet, but I know you meant no harm 

Jimmy: see, Tae, we're not mad

Taetae: promise? 

Jimmy: pinky promise 

Yoongz: promise, kid 

Taetae: yay!

Jinnie: even yoongi is affected by taehyung's cuteness. He truly is a blessing

Hoebi: yes bc now we've been blessed with yoonmin coming true

Jimmy: tbh we've been together since summer, so technically, taehyung blessed you guys with the truth

Joonie: Since summer? That long?

Yoongz:  yeah

Hoebi: and you guys planned on feigning innocence to our failed attempts of getting you two together for how long?

Jimmy: we were going to tell you guys at first, but i wanted to have a little fun >:)

Hoebi: You. Are. Evil.

Yoongz: that's my baby 

Jimmy: <3

Jinnie: oh jesus, help us all

Jinnie: yoonmin are going to be that couple

Jimmy: deal with it, hyung :p

Hoebi: damn, does that mean we can't tease them anymore?

Jinnie: , you're right

Yoongz: thanks for being supportive of our relationship

Hoebi: oh hush yoongles

Hoebi: we're literally sobbing in each other's arms for the smooth cruising of the yoonmin ship

Jinnie: but now i feel empty

Joonie: Why?

Jinnie: bc now our lives don't have any purpose anymore

Yoongz: what the actual

Hoebi: we vowed to spend the rest of our lives getting you two together cause tbh it looked like it'd take a lifetime

Jimmy: hey

Jinnie: and now that you two are actually together, we're just lost

Joonie: You could focus on school.

Jinnie: you're adorable

Hoebi: no but like, who are we supposed ship, tease, and plan to get together?

Jinnie: yeah that's what kept this gc from being the Sahara desert

Jimmy: there are some people i'd highly recommend

Hoebi: who??

Kookie: hi, taehyung hyung! :)

Taetae: jungkookie? the cute photographer??

Kookie: lol maybe?

Taetae: definitely you haha

Taetae:  and hello!! :D

Hoebi: oh

Jinnie: oh, indeed

 

~ ~ ~

Jung Hoseok has created a new group chat

Jung Hoseok has named the group "TAEKOOK FAN CLUB"

Jung Hoseok has added 'Kim Namjoon', 'Kim Seokjin', 'Min Yoongi', and 'Park Jimin' to the group

Jung Hoseok has changed their name to 'president'

 

president: ya'll already know wtf is going on