And my soul

Stay still my heart
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What's the festival about?," Kyungsoo asks, curious eyes wandering around watching the colorful thin strips of papers flattering in air as the wind sways the branches of small bamboo tree branches. Every house has a stick of bamboo shot poking from either the top, or in front of the house, and the branches decorated with paper cranes and such.

 

The whole town has transformed into something else as if it was dipped in rainbow river. The streets filled with new yatai as the amount of pedestrians has noticeably increased and the business buzzing more than normal days. Kids cheerfully running around holding colorful papers and eating sweets.

 

Every corner of the town is decorated with enormous colorful paper streamers in beautiful complimentary colors tied to ropes connecting two ends of poles as they hang above a foot over their heads, swaying in the wind, some are decorated with small ornaments and glitters.

 

"Tanabata festival," Jongin supplies as if that's self explanatory, as if Kyungsoo knows anything about Japan beyond that it's land of anime and cherry blossoms and some weird stuff he had came across articles about the country being weird with what-nots? You name it, you will find it.

 

Azumi declares something as she drags Jongin by pulling his shirt towards one of the yatai that's selling something as the sweet scent of it waffles through the air mixed with some of the neighboring stall's meat juices sizzling on the hot surface over fire.

 

Jongin grins and get them both something on stick, and she happily stuffs the first two pieces into and laughs as they make their way back where Kyungsoo stood studying a poster plastered on the nearby wall.

 

"Want some?" Jongin offers it without waiting for his answer. Kyungsoo shakes his head but his mouth gets stuffed with a sweet rice cake sort of thing. He glares but chews on the sweet delight. There was a big poster of some shrine with decorations all around and something written in Japanese in nice of lines and dots. Jongin tells him that's it’s about the shrine nearby, which he hasn't bothered to visited either, since it was a festival there would be some sort of prayers and all that religious jazz. Jongin doesn't believe in God, well he does but in a way that's not worldly.

 

"Do you want to go to pray?" Jongin asks still entertaining a very hyper Azumi. Kyungsoo waves it off side stepping from another streamer that's going wild with the wind. Some were hung low, and falling on people's faces even for someone who falls on shorter side like Kyungsoo.

 

Azumi coaxes them into playing few shooting games which both at, horribly missing every balloon and losing. Instead they buy a doll for the kid. Jongin buys a small penguin doll for Kyungsoo which earns him a weak punch on arm with a barely concealed smile. They fill their stomachs with a festival special noodle dish, chilled white noodles served with colorful topping of veggies and dip. Kyungsoo ends up cleaning the dip poured over the kid’s gown. She worries her lips thinking Kyungsoo is angry but he assures her and tells to be careful next time, which earns him a smile. She is cute, he thinks.

 

Azumi puts a flower behind her ear, acting cute and Jongin encourages her clapping his hands and smiling wide and she latches on Kyungsoo’s hand twirling around him. It looks sickeningly sweet and domestic that Kyungsoo almost gags but secretly loves the idea of having a family with Jongin, it leaves him with a tiny ache in heart but is quickly forgotten in favor of the caramel Apple's taste on his tongue.

 

"What's Tanabata festival about?," Kyungsoo asks on their way to home. They had dropped Azumi off at her grandmother's house, the old lady had thanked them again and again, for taking the child out since her old body wasn't able to keep the hyper child close and in one piece, to which the little girl had pouted hard, playing with Kyungsoo's fingers while he lets her.

 

"The star crossed lovers will meet today, once a year exclusive date," Jongin tell him, and when Kyungsoo gives a confused look he elaborates, "Once upon a time two people fell in love, and got together. They were neglecting their work so they were separated to do their work," Jongin adds with a smirk.

 

Kyungsoo glares pinching Jongin's arm "You sure you're talking about festival?" He levels a blank face, crossing his hands over chest in defense.  

 

"What else it's about?" Jongin gives him an amused smile, but the lift of his eyebrow is saying something else.

 

Rolling his eyes, Kyungsoo pulls out the phone to do a quick Google search and finds similar story with names and all the origins history etc etc and that the festival falls on  Seventh day of seventh month of every year according to traditional calendar and this year it falls on August 7 th  .

 

The smug look he receives when he closes the tab and looks up has Kyungsoo blushing, as the ears turn red.

 

"Your mom is gonna punish us for ditching work too," comes like a reminder.

 

As if Kyungsoo gives any s about it, he ends up shrugging and pocketing the device after swiping away the new notifications.  "Will see when it happens." He kicks one of the stray stone to the side and adds "And for record she can't do anything if an employee decides quit right?"

 

.

.

.

 

"Do you have any idea how many steps were there?" Jongin pants, bending forward with hands on knees and breathing heavily.

 

"Jongin!!!" Kyungsoo's surprised to see him there but quickly reaches forward, places a hand on the other's face, forcing himself not to just reachout to check the pulse, cause Jongin hates  . It's hot and wet from the sweat running down from the hairline,some of the long strands sticking to sides of face.

 

"Why did you come!" Kyungsoo whines once Jongin had evened out his laboured breathing and is standing at the water faucet to wash up the sweat with cold water.

 

"why ? am I not allowed into the shrine?," He asks exaggeratedly placing a hand on heart with mock hurt.

 

"That's not what I mean-," he sighs, standing there lips pressed together into a thin line watching Jongin splashes some water over his face.

 

"What are you hiding?" Jongin narrows his eyes, tilting his head to side. Encircling both arms around Kyungsoo's waist he reaches for what's the shorter was hiding behind his back. A few droplets of water fall on Kyungsoo's neck as the hot breath ghosts over the skin, he shivers as eyes fall shut. Jongin is too close, almost hugging him. His hold looses unconsciously, letting Jongin take it with ease.

 

"Tanzaku," Jongin mutters holding it from one end, as all the colorful papers fall into a arc like a rainbow, and the thin ribbon threads swaying with the wind. A thick stack of wish papers Kyungsoo had bought from the seller on the way to shrine.

 

Kyungsoo's shoulders tenses, "Are you mad at me?" He asks in his low voice, not knowing what to expect. One, he had came to the shrine without telling the other and two, making wishes like this.. like a pathetic loser. But he wants to try.. do whatever he can.. beg to whoever god's.

 

Jongin laughs a little, eyes crinkling. Shaking his head as a no, he hands it back. "Are these all?"

 

Kyungsoo sniffs, and shakes his head, "No, I tied a few."

 

"Few papers?"

 

"..."

 

"Stacks," Kyungsoo admits, looking away shyly.

 

Oh..

 

Jongin's smile falters, just a little. But he clears his throat, making Kyungsoo finally look up. "Do you need help with the rest?"

 

Kyungsoo shakes his head again, with a sad smile on his lips, thankful for the offer, "I have to do this," he says, taking the papers back from Jongin, who lets go of them all.

 

Jongin sits there watching Kyungsoo furiously scribbling down on each paper and waddling around tying them to the bamboo tree branches. Most of them are already filled with wishes.

 

Kyungsoo stands on his toes, fingers pulling the two strings together to form a knot. Suddenly the branch lowers by itself. Turning around, he comes to face to face with Jongin whose long arms tugging the branch lower and is wearing a mischievous smirk. "Shortie" he mouths.

 

Kyungsoo lets himself fall back on his feet finding footing from standing on tip toes. "Thank you," he says pleased when Jongin winches over dramatically just because of a small jab in his ribs.

 

"So many wishes you have there," Jongin teases him once Kyungsoo is done tying the last paper and rubs his hands together and then cracking the stiff fingers, satisfied when they make small cracking noises.

 

"Just one." comes the curt answer.

 

"Huh?!" Jongin blinks and after several minutes of no response, looks back at Kyungsoo, who just shrugs and averting eyes at the first chance of whatever distraction he could find.

 

They end up praying together, Kyungsoo taking longer, so Jongin busies himself watching the way Kyungsoo's big hands attached to slim wrists clasped together and eyes shut together, eyebrows furrowed. The shorter almost looks like he is having a fight with whatever deities he is relaying those prayers to. It won't be a surprise if Kyungsoo is really having a battle with whatever god's up there, he is like that, stubborn lil , won't ever give up.  His stubborn lil . Jongin feels his heart growing an inch more, if the same goes on, his chest won't be able to hold his overgrown - filled with love for Kyungsoo - heart anymore, might someday just leap out and roll to Kyungsoo's feet and lay there begging for mercy.

 

"What did you ask for?," Jongin nudges him as they walk out together.

 

"Can't tell," he answers, brings their both hands together and linking them by sliding his fingers between the gaps of Jongin's.

 

Jongin squeezes his fingers closing them around Kyungsoo's. They are smaller than his, but they fit well, and warm just like Kyungsoo's soul. Which country did he saved in his previous life that he got someone like Kyungsoo? Jongin wonders smiling down at him, lips stretching into a small pink heart outline formed by the lips, and pearly white teeth almost filling them. And Jongin doesn't think twice as he dips down to press a tender kiss to them lips, and whispers, “I hope it comes true."

 

The wind blew a little stronger, messing up Jongin's overgrown hair and covering his eyes a little, but the heart shaped smile he was gifted as Kyungsoo turns to him doesn’t go unnoticed. And it takes him two heartbeats to pull Kyungsoo closer to his chest and cover him boldly. Today he can be a little greedy. In the name of star crossed lovers reunion, he can display a little of his love, as he loves his lover a little more... A lot more and more. as the day goes on and even more the next day.

 

Kyungsoo wiggles and squirms in his hold whispering things that flew with the wind for the first few times but after a jab to his ribs brings him out of his head and loosening the grip. "People are watching," he says shyly, as his cheeks flushed.

 

"Then let's go somewhere else... just you and I," Jongin replies taking the small hand in his and walking absent mindedly to somewhere, anywhere, where he can love without anyone's curious eyes praying or judging.

 

He settled himself on a rock and Kyungsoo beside him, his arm resting over the petite shoulder, as Kyungsoo nuzzles closer. The shrine up the hills with so many steps, and then on one side, spreads into forest with long trees. From there they could still see the people going in and out of the shrine and making wishes, and praying. The loud chatters from the far distance are just dulled whispers carried by the wind.

 

The world around blurs in distance as the sun hides behind the horizon long ago to shine over other continents. The orange hue kisses the horizon as the dark blues drapes rest of the sky as a beautiful gradient created in photoshop. Jongin thinks it would make a nice cover for the manga, with the lead lazily leaning in the curve of crescent moon with a foot dangling down, like how Kyungsoo is dangling his legs, as he crooned a tune too familiar even without words.

 

"You don't draw anymore," Kyungsoo whispers out of nowhere as if he was reading Jongin's trail of thoughts just by sitting beside him, fiddling their joined fingers.

 

"Maybe I should?" He says.. questions.. maybe himself. "Will you be my canvas?" He chuckles when Kyungsoo's face morphs into a confused expression with caterpillar like brows furrowed together and meeting in the centre as he turns his puzzled face to look at Jongin. The shrine Bell rings as wooden block hits the suspended hollow metal mould, sending vibrations through the air. It bursts the bubble around them as well as startling the birds resting on the trees nearby.

 

Later that night, the sky gets covered in paper lanterns lit brightly, fighting with the stars for once, carrying the wishes of people with them. Jongin prays whatever gods up there to fulfill Kyungsoo's one wish.


 

***

 

"Tasty," Jongin muses throwing the stem in the bowl sitting between them.

 

Kyungsoo nods his agreement lips tight shut, as his cheeks bulged as he leans on the wooden pole. There are still some left on the stem.

 

Few droplets of sweat pooling in the curve of his neck, his fair skin flushed red due to the humidity.

 

Jongin casts his neck to a side watching him, Kyungsoo blushes under the gaze and quickly chews and brings a hands to wipe away the juice escaping the corners of his lips. They went for a morning walk as the sun just peeking over the clouds making it a perfect day to stroll around. They bought some really pretty looking Kyoho-Japanese grapes. They grew so big and fleshy because of the intense hot summer heat.

 

Jongin catches his hand, fingers ghosting the hot skin and leans in as a tongue peeks out to run over the smooth skin covered in juice of the grapes. "Delicious," he smiles pecking the lips before he readjusts to his original place with a smile on his lips.

 

It takes Kyungsoo a few moments to shake off his .jpg mode with a murmur of " you" and then he runs off inside the house leaving a laughing Jongin behind at the flustered mess of his boyfriend. Boyfriends!!!!!! It's really happening. Kyungsoo, Jongin's boyfriend after so many years of holding back.

 

They have to make up for the lost time, time Jongin had been holding on like a stupid he was.


 

***


 


"I am not coming back!" Kyungsoo stated sternly.

 

Jongin flinches at the harsh tone but quickly composes himself before setting the tray on the low table. Sliding a cup of tea to the older woman, who in turn glares at him, and another to Kyungsoo, before he excuses himself silently.

 

"DO KYUNGSOO!!"

 

"You can take the DO with you when you leave, have the tea before it turns cold .."  like your heart , his mind supplies but he bites in his tongue to stop it from escaping his lips.

Mama Do's unannounced visit had him on toes the whole day. She had the nerve to come and try to drag Kyungsoo back to the hell hole of the company, after all these years of forcing and threatening him to do what she wanted. Not anymore.

 

"You have to come with me or else," her hand curls in her lap. As seconds tick by, her anger is growing and practically looming over her head like monsoon clouds, dark and ready to burst at any given minute.

 

"Or else?!!!! Or else what mother?!" Kyungsoo stands up, he takes a deep breath, then tugging his hair. "Or else what else would you take away from me?? I have nothing!! Nothing more you can threaten me with!!" With tears in his eyes, Kyungsoo storms out of the room.

 

And the tea cup breaks along with the woman, "I only wanted best for you," she whispers to the empty room. Maybe she didn’t realize what’s best doesn’t always make one happy, or may have forgotten that small piece of knowledge fighting for the power.

 

Jongin comes and gathers the broken pieces one by one before the woman can hurt herself by touching it. "He doesn't want the company," he tells her. Maybe she knew it already, he was just merely reminding and continued, "He never liked it in the first place."

Placing a new cup on the table, he pours fresh hot tea before sliding it towards her. She had her head down, not able to look at him. He vaguely remembers her dirty look over him, the first time Kyungsoo took him home. She never liked Jongin, but he never let that bother him, and it did not bother him now. By the time she spares him a glance, it was as if she threw a silent accusing, ‘You changed my son,’ which stung a little.

 

The expensive tires screech over the cement road. "She left," Jongin announces, then arranges himself on the wooden floor and hisses at the hardness.

 

Kyungsoo nods absentmindedly, throwing a handful of pellets into the koi pond. The fish swims to the surface for the food, opening their mouths wide. Kyungsoo had bought the unused large brass tub from the old couple who runs a family store few streets across and turned it into a small koi pond.

 


"We need to move the pond to shade, the koi loosing their colors," he says playing with the with the red and black dotted fish that came to the surface. The white and red aren't as vibrant as they used to be maybe because of the sun blasting like it's no one's business.

 

Jongin sighs at the lukewarm response and turns himself towards the shorter to pull him close. Kyungsoo groans but Jongin holds his face between both palms making the eye contact before he can pass his message across, "You can't take refuge in a burning house, Soo."

 

Kyungsoo pauses for a second, the darting side ways eyes finally giving up on escape staying still ... And then he burst into guffaws of laughter, as his tired eyes finally breaks into tears. "I would rather burn down with the house than die on the streets... Jongin, please,"  please.. "This is what I want,"  you... I want you...us .

 

Kyungsoo takes a deep breath and gulping down the lump in his throat. Before he knows it, Jongin had leaned forward pressing their lips together in a silent protest to stop whatever words that's threatening to spill out of his lips. They get drunk on their tears that day, as the packet of pel

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Dreamying
Am @jagibros on twt if you wanna come say hello,talk, or gush about Kyungsoo, Jongin,kaisoo, exo or just anything under the sun or beyond.

Comments

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shipthatneverdies
#1
Chapter 3: What a rollercoaster ride of emotions ?? thank you author-nim
dianaderful
#2
Chapter 3: this fic is so beautiful and heartbreaking in the same time. i love it!!!!!!!!
Pyunkk #3
Chapter 3: ugh, why so saddd?
arisa12
#4
Chapter 3: So sad (╥﹏╥)(╥﹏╥) i thought jongin is sick but at the end kyungsoo is the one who left him. (╥╯﹏╰╥)ง(╥╯﹏╰╥)ง
flytothesKAI
#5
Chapter 3: I never screamed this loud before omg...thanks for writing and reading my heart apart tho... :'))
Do_me_Kyungsoo
#6
Chapter 1: I just finished first chapter, I want quote some of the line. They are so beautiful. But I can't wait to click next and finish reading. The water moon reference reminds me of moonlight song.

"Is that why you love me?" How cruel Jongin, how cruel.

Jongin wearing Kyungsoo's scarf, messily- is this non au? Lol

Kyungsoo is spring al year along. How apt.

I tried to leave a long comment since that's new fashion, but Amy sorry I am Impatient, so that's it for this chapter. Stupid Jongin ran away, I can't wait how you are going to bring them together again.
Nicole121314 #7
Chapter 3: Uh oh... why why why
Nicole121314 #8
Chapter 2: They're so cute
Nicole121314 #9
Chapter 1: Oh my Jongin...