chapter six
“Have you ever seen the dawn? Not a dawn groggy with lack of sleep or hectic with mindless obligations and you about to rush off on an early adventure or business, but full of deep silence and absolute clarity of perception? A dawning which you truly observe, degree by degree. It is the most amazing moment of birth. And more than anything it can spur you to action.” - Vera Nazarian

“There are many reasons why businesses fail. Failure can be rooted in bad management, misguided leadership, strategic failings, market changes or just plain bad luck.”

Seungwoo watched as the reporter on the small T.V. screen offered viewers a sympathetic look. She straightens the pages on her desk, subtly whisking her blond bangs away from her blue eyes. However, despite what her eyes were trying to convey her posture and the way she looked away from the camera stated she was just reciting what she’d been practicing all morning. None of it hit home for her and Seungwoo found it annoying that she was trying to portray this type of compassionate character when all she was probably worried about at the moment was whether her make-up was creasing.

The thirty something-year-old american news anchor continued, “Launched in 2015, Ahn Models is a full-service modeling and talent agency headquartered in New York City, United States. It was founded by Susan Ahn and currently provides full-service representation and management to models, and musicians. In 2016 the company gained attention with the rising fame of a young supermodel, Sam Ong, who was later revealed to be the son of Miss Ahn. The company has had a good run for the last few years but things are starting to look grim for the small business thanks to the disappearance of Mr. Ong.”

Seungwoo hated the news. The news was never just  "the news." It was an outlet of exaggeration and limitedself control, carefully designed to be addictive and misleading. The public loved it. And why not? It was a place to find out all the secrets about their favorite celebrities whether the facts were true or not. Maybe he would have felt indifferent towards it if his family wasn’t the mornings "entertainment." But that isn't the case.

He puts the clean bowl back into the counter unused. Suddenly the thought of eating cereal made him nauseous. He glanced back at the T.V. screen as the woman continued and Seungwoo wondered if he'd always found her unattractive or if the sudden contempt towards her stemmed from the moment she’d decided to cover his families story. Was her nose always that big? And what was wrong with her voice? It no longer sounded like the soft riff of a strange melody but more like the Kermit timbre of upper-class arrogance. She looked sweet but her words were venomous, like cupcakes sprinkled with poison, spreading false truth and hate.

“It was reported that the young man left the company without a word. To date, all of his scheduled appointments, including photoshoots, commercials, guest appearances and so on, have been canceled though some are reportedly still pending the arrival of Mr. Ong. The company, known to represent not only Sam but rising stars Francisco Lachowski, Barbie Ferreira, Robyn Lawley, Sora Choi, was dependant on Sam’s work as the lead model and company representative. Susan Anh is currently facing distress thanks to the Anna Wintour backlash as more and more companies continue closing their doors, refusing to work with anyone attached to the Anh Models brand.”

The news rolls over him like an old Russian tank, slow and painful, carrying on as if it wasn't crushing the life out of him. He was thousands of miles away from the chaos and yet he still felt as if he was smack dab in the middle of it. He’d never intended to cause his mother such anguish. All he’d wanted was to break away from the tide and yet he was still being consumed by it.

Seungwoo knew that all he needed to do was return home and all of it would stop and his mother's company would be in the right again but it didn't seem fair to him. Sure he could fix everyone else's problems but who was going to help him with his? Did he really need to give up his happiness again? Was he being selfish in choosing to be happy instead?

Seungwoo wished the news wasn't so depressing. He wished everyone could move on and be happy but for some reason, happiness always seemed to avert his family. The soft fuse of the sound of the television catches his attention and he glances back to see his aunt in the doorway, remote control poised in the direction of the small screen.

“You shouldn't keep doing this to yourself. Keeping tabs on what's happening over there isn't going to do anything but make you worry.” She said softly, walking into the kitchen and placing the control on the counter.

“I know, it's just… What's happening over there is my fault. It doesn't seem right to leave it all on my mom's shoulders.”

Hye-jung crossed her eyes and pursed her lips, “So what are you going to do? Are you going to go back?”

Seungwoo didn't answer right away. If any one knew how he felt about staying in Korea it was his aunt. For years she had been his source of encouragement, always on his side, always listening to his worries, his pains, and his goals. She knew more than anyone that all he'd wanted from the moment he'd left was to return and now that he was here he didn't want to leave, for anything. But she also knew he had a great sense of responsibility for someone his age and a conscious as big and prominent as the Lotte World Tower.

He sighed, playing with the buttons on his uniform, “I really don't want to go back…”

“Then stop worrying about it.”

She stepped forward and placed both hands on his shoulders causing him to look straight at her. He was four inches taller than her but she managed to even them out with her tall heels.

“Seungwoo I'm only going to tell you this once. You are seventeen years old, you are not Hye Soo’s father, and you are not Hye Soo’s guardian.”

“But-”

“But nothing. Look, I love my sister but like the rest of us she isn't perfect. And she has done a few things that I wish she would have done differently. Like how she raised you after your father died. Nothing that is happening with her company is your fault. She should have never put so much pressure on you and she certainly shouldn't have worked you so hard. I know you youngsters don't like hearing this but your just a kid.”

Seungwoo nodded at her words. He understood what she was saying and maybe she was right.

Hye-jung continued, “You shouldn't feel a responsibility to fix this all by yourself and you need to understand that your mother is an adult. If she was capable of getting this far on her own then she should be capable of taking care of her business.”

Seungwoo felt horrible either way. Even if it wasn't his fault that the company was sinking-- which he didn't believe for a second that it wasn't --he'd still left his mother to face the backlash all alone. She was never around most of the time but he was the only person she had.

“Are you still thinking about it?” Hye-jung asked him as she analyzed the far away look in his eyes. He nodded and she tsked, “Aigoo,” she pinched his cheeks, shaking his head as if to rattle his brain and scatter his thoughts in many million directions so they weren't bothering him. She stepped away to grab her keys from the wall.

“Well, you're just like your mother I'll give you that, stubborn and unswayable. Come on mini-Soo, I’ll drop you off at school.”

Seungwoo smiles and follows her out the side door. Despite the rolling stones in his stomach making each of his footsteps heavier than the last, he knew his aunt is right. He can't help his mother this time. First, he needs to help himself and staying here in this small town, in this small country, was the only way he could mend his hurting heart.

He needs to say goodbye to his father. He needs to reconnect with his family. But most importantly, he needs to bide his time here. One day he knows his mother will return to get him and only then would she be able to confront the past. She is hurting just as much as he is and right now he was her only hope in moving on. One day his mother would return and then he could really get his plan into motion.

The blue Kia Sorento SUV pulled up to the front gates of the crowded high school, catching the attention of a few students as they noticed who had arrived. They whispered excitedly amongst themselves as Seungwoo stepped out, shutting the car door and turning to glance through the passenger seats open window, “Thanks for dropping me off.”

Hye-jung smiles, the corner of her eyes transforming into a litter of crows feet, “Have fun today and try not to worry too much about the things that can't be helped.”

“I’ll try,” he grins.

“Okay, I’ll be here to pick you up after school, see you later.”

After saying his goodbye Seungwoo stepped back and watched as his aunt drove away. Have fun, don’t worry.

Have fun, don't worry.

Have fun, don't worry.

Walking in through the front gates Seungwoo continued to repeat this new mantra. None of his classmates considered school fun but Seungwoo found it a blast. Besides History, which he seemed to be struggling in, every other class was a breeze. He thoroughly enjoyed school so ‘having fun’ wasn't going to be an issue. It was keeping his mind away from all the chaos back home that he would struggle with.

Still, he would do his best to keep it out of his mind.

Seungwoo walked slowly enjoying the warmth of the sun on his back and soft purr of wind that flowed around him.

‘I can't believe how good looking he is! Do you think he got plastic surgery?’

‘Is he an angel?’

‘I heard he's internationally famous. I need his autograph!’

‘Our school is so lucky!’

Whispers and gazes followed Seungwoo as he made his way up the yard to the school. His cheeks grew red at their comments and he lowered his head slightly and continued to walk without meeting anyone's eyes. He was used to the stares and the comments by now but they still embarrassed him.

As he neared the front doors to the building someone called out to him and he stopped, turning around to be greeted with the sight of Jeongyeon and Daniel as they walked towards him.

The blonde boy walked with his left hand in his pant pocket and his right carrying his backpack by the hook strap. Daniel had the kind of face that stopped a person dead in their tracks. The girls were head over heels for him and it didn't help that he was so modest about it. Daniel didn't go around flaunting his looks or even expecting others to treat him differently because of it and this only made the girls fall for him all the more. However, despite all the attention he garnered he was a one-woman-man. The rumor was that he and Jeongyeon had been together since freshman year and no one could come between them. But Seungwoo didn't know why anyone would want to break the couple up. In Seungwoo’s eyes, he was exceptionally cool and he wondered if Daniel even had to try to look this mysterious and unfazed or if it just came naturally to him.

Beside him, Jeongyeon wore her hair parted on the side with a pink clip keeping the short locks away from her face. Her bangs hung low but didn't seem to disturb her eyes and her lips were glossy. With the sun at her back, she seemed to come from another dimension, painted in fluorescent colors and highlighted in gold. As she smiles, rays of colors from every end of the spectrum radiat off of her, flying in all directions, looking for an untouched canvas on which to leave a mark. Instead of being someone's muse, she seemed to be the art itself. Her backpack hung loosely on her shoulders.

Alone they were statuesque. Together they were imposing, awakening the worlds aesthetic senses and forcing them to come alive; Seungwoo, like the rest of the student body, was struck by their beauty. Together, they were an extraordinary sight.

Seungwoo smiles at them as they catch up, “Hey, morning.”

“Hey,” Jeongyeon said cheerfully, “”We were just talking about you.”

“Me?” He asked, pointing a finger at his chest. Seungwoo couldn't picture Daniel saying much and he figures she means she's been the one talking about him. His curiosity peaks.

“Yeah, we saw the news this morning. We know what everyone is saying about your mom and her company…”

Seungwoo’s stomach churned. Looks like it was going to be harder to keep it out of his mind. Especially when the entire school must already know about it and would surely be talking.

“Are you okay?” Jeongyeon asks, placing a hand on his shoulder.

There is a small fire burning on his shoulder from where her fingers lay and Seungwoo looks into her eyes, wondering what this feeling is that is taking over his speech.

“I’m fine,” He finally manages, “You shouldn't believe everything the news says. Most of it is either exaggerated or untrue so…”

“Still, I can't help but worry, you're my friend.” Jeongyeon smiled and her words settled comfortably around him.

“Everything is fine back home. I know my mother, she can handle anything that goes her way.”

She nods and her hands falls to her side. The loss of her warmth depressed Seungwoo though he couldn't understand why. It probably had to do with the fact that from the moment he'd arrived she had always been there to guide and comfort him. Daniel was a lucky guy to have found someone like Jeongyeon.

Just then a great force plowed into Seungwoo from behind. It temporarily knocks the air from his chest and his eyes bulge. He doesn't need to turn around to know who it was.

“Good morning!” Nayeon sings happily as she squeezes the rest of the air out of him. She breaks apart from him to greet her friends, leaving Seungwoo gasping for breath.

Great, Nayeon's here, Seungwoo thinks sarcastically. As soon as he thinks it he reprimands himself. He didn't want to think rudely towards her, besides Jeongyeon, Nayeon had also been there from the start for him. Unlike Jeongyeon, Nayeon didn't know when to stop meddling and most of the time it was just too much for him.

After greeting everyone Nayeon went off on another talking fit. She tended to do that as well. Most of the time it was only her talking while the rest of them stayed quiet and listened, or as in Seungwoo’s case, pretended to listen. It isn't that Seungwoo didn't like her, she was nice and cute but her personality was too strong. At least for him, it was.

The four continue up the yard towards the school entrance with Nayeon talking non-stop about some dress she'd ordered online that was taken longer to arrive than she’d thought.

“Sorry Nabongs, I can’t, I have work today after school.”

Seungwoo had unconsciously stopped listening a few minutes ago but he tunes in at the sound of someone else's voice that isn't Nayeon's. He was almost to the cement steps when Nayeon suddenly stopped in front of him, her arms like vulture claws, gripping his shoulders.

He looked into her eyes and noticed they looked kind of crazed, “Why don't you accompany me Seungwoo?”

Seungwoo’s words froze in his throat but before he could think of what to say, movement in peripheral vision caught his attention. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a blur falling to the ground. He brushes Nayeon off and leaps forward, wrapping his arms around the girl's waist as she plummeted closer to the floor. Her momentum catches him off guard and he falls with her, turning at the last minute so that i