Kyuhyun walked towards me and held my hand. “Wonnie, jagiya, what’s wrong?” His beautiful, innocent eyes were staring back at me. Aaah! I will soon turn this happy being to a miserable one!

I enclosed his hand into both of mine. “Kyu, anhja.” I led him to sit beside me on the couch. And so I began torturing myself... And Kyuhyun.

I looked at him. I wanted to say it is the end. I wanted to tell him that inspite of all of this, I love him. But words left me as I stare at the most beautiful face I have ever seen. There was silence for a few good minutes. And I couldn’t help it. I touched Kyuhyun’s face and a lone tear trickled down my face.

“Wonnie.. What is it? Are you sick? Are you hurting? Come on, Choi Siwon. You’re scaring me!”

“Kyu.. mianhe…”

“Sorry for what, Won?”

“I’m sorry, Kyuhyun.. But I guess, this is as far as I can go.” I lowered my head down as I felt the tears rushing to fall again.

Kyuhyun shook his head. “No… Andwae… You’re not doing this, Choi Siwon.” He whispered.

I cupped Kyuhyun’s face in my hands. “Kyu... baby… things has…”

“Changed?” Kyuhyun finished my sentence for me. He blinked and a pearl shaped tear rolled down that beautiful face.

“Baby... there are a lot of things in my head... A lot of things I wanted to do aside from being in Super Junior and acting. And I wouldn’t have time for you…”

Okay, I admit, that was lame. A lame excuse for an unexplainable decision.

“Bull! We had tons to do all these years, as a group and individually, and yet we made time, Siwon! So don’t give me that crap!” Kyuhyun was starting to break down.

“Kyu, baby, listen to me. Please…” I begged, at the same time prayed to the heavens that I do this as gently as possible.

“I’m listening.”

I knelt in front of him and held his hands. “I… Kyu… I…” I was trembling. I was shaking.

Kyuhyun looked at our hands laced together. “Is this the end, hyung?”

The words Kyuhyun said hit me like lightning. It burned me. I slowly nodded in response.

“Why? Wae, hyung? We were doing fine until now, weren’t we? Please help me understand why you’re doing this? Jebal…”

I was expecting Kyuhyun to yell at me, to throw things at me, to break down in front of me. But he killed me with his softness.

I touched Kyuhyun’s chin and lifted his face. I haven’t even started yet he looked so broken now, with those eyes speaking so much. I cupped that face in between my hands and caressed his cheeks with my thumbs.

Eotteokhae? What am I doing to you?

Just a little bit more and I would take back everything I said and we would stay together. But there’s another thing that my MS taught me to have. A strong will. Desp