Classes restart the next morning, and Jisoo has never known regret quite as intense as the one she currently feels. Her head throbs, her eyes are puffy, and she’s pretty sure she smells like a damn brewery.

But her professors wait for no one, and her grades can’t go any lower or she’s doomed to hell and back, and she has to try to function like at least a semi-decent human being.

Her class is at 10:00 a.m., and when her alarm clock blares annoyingly, she spends a good fifteen minutes staring at the ceiling and seriously considers not going. The class is Gender Studies, which is just about the only class she has with Jennie. And she only ever ended up registering for it because Jennie asked her to.

And Jisoo cannot refuse Jennie anything. Not even her own sanity.

Ugh. She’s so damn whipped, it’s not even funny.

She hauls herself out of bed like some sort of swamp monster. Eats cold pizza and drinks a cup of coffee, which should do for breakfast because she can’t be bothered to actually put in any effort. She can barely start the drip, as it were.

She spends a ridiculous amount of time just sitting on the kitchen counter afterwards, staring at the blank wall. It’s an interesting shade of white. Not too white. Not grey. Just, a fair amount of white. 10/10 would recommend.

She should have invested in some paintings or picture frames or posters for her walls, like Seulgi suggested.

Maybe she’ll ask the girl for some of her doodles later. Or something.

Or maybe Jisoo should just print out a notice, some kind of Public Service Announcement:

GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR

That’ll work too. You know, to remind herself to get her head out of her . And to move on.

Gosh, this has to stop. Jisoo can’t carry on like this. If she does, her friends are going to come for her head.

Wait, no. That sounds wrong. Ugh.

But they’re going to, like, talk to her and they’re going to discuss what’s going on with her lately. More specifically, they’re going to discuss Jisoo’s feelings.

Ha. Jisoo’s feelings. What a joke.

Feelings are cancelled, a voice within her says. They’re annoying and also bothersome.

Yeah, Jisoo readily agrees.

Jesus. She’s talking to herself now. That’s not good, is it?

She showers to try and refresh her mind, but it only serves to make her a cold mess. Still she dresses, though, and grabs her bag before giving herself a chance to spiral into a second emotional crisis in as many hours.  

She meets up with Irene by the pretty arch in the humanities compound, another coffee in hand and her phone in the other.

“You look amazing,” Irene greets, smirking. She’s holding a file case close to her chest. She’s also wearing her glasses, making her look like the smart student that she actually is.

Jisoo rolls her eyes. “You look evil,” she returns, though she’s honestly thankful that Irene enrolled in the class too. At least there’s going to be a buffer, you know, for when Jisoo inevitably s up or something.

Not that she’s telling Irene that.

Irene laughs, falling in step with her. “Ouch, Jisoo, straight through my heart, huh.”

“Nothing straight could ever be associated with you.”

“Agreed.”

They continue bickering until they reach the classroom, though Jisoo hesitates right at the doorway.

Irene peers inside, sees Jennie already there. Jisoo gulps.

“You sure you got this?” Irene asks her, in a kind tone, which she only ever uses with Seulgi. Jisoo would laugh were she not, you know, dying on the damn spot.

“No.”

“You could skip.”

Jisoo raises an eyebrow at that. “Are you, the honour student, telling me to skip class?”

“I’m not saying you should, but you could.” Irene shrugs. “Though, be honest: do you really think skipping will do you any good? You’re going to run into her sooner or later, you know. You’re just delaying the inevitable.”

Jisoo stares at Irene, who looks at her innocently enough, though there’s that hint of a challenge in her eyes, as if she’s waiting to see what choice Jisoo would pick and is somehow already disappointed in it, despite it not being made yet.

She glances inside the room. Jennie is fidgeting with her pen, perhaps wondering where her friends are already.

She returns her gaze to Irene. “I hate you so ing much,” she grumbles.

Irene laughs again, the witch. “I know,” she says, before heading inside.

Jisoo groans, grips her bag strap tighter.

She follows.

Jennie looks up as Irene and Jisoo arrive, Irene taking the seat next to Jennnie’s and Jisoo taking the one next to Irene. She quirks her eyebrow, a silent question—Jisoo always takes the place next to her. It’s an unspoken rule, and not one of their friends dare to break it.

Until now.

Jisoo waves. “Yo.”

Jennie merely stares.

“Good morning, Jennie,” Irene says.

“Did you rip out your tongue? Did you turn mute?” Jisoo prompts, when Jennie remains silent. Jennie’s stare is unnerving, it’s sorta scary.

Irene huffs, probably to prevent herself from laughing outright. Sweet intention, though Jisoo still decides to kill her later.

“You look amazing,” Jennie says at last.

At that Irene actually laughs. The nerve. She ignores Jisoo’s glare too. Maybe Jisoo should kill her sometime sooner.

“Thank you,” Jisoo tells Jennie, deadpan. “Your appreciation is . . . appreciated.”

“Your vocabulary never fails to astound me, Jisoo.”

“I live to please,” Jisoo says. Words to live by, you know. “Also, shut up, Jendeuk.” She stops. Thinks Jendeuk and wishes for the ground to swallow her whole, please, because being with Jennie and stopping whatever the hell should be stopped (i.e., Jisoo’s feelings) wouldn’t be as easy as she hoped. Of course not, because the universe delights in her suffering.

Jennie doesn’t shut up. “I haven’t seen you in days,” she says instead, as if Jisoo is not aware of that fact.

As if Jisoo isn’t the one who made sure they didn’t see each other. Because Jisoo is not a coward, you know, except when it comes to the one thing that matters to her the most.

It is a bit ed up, really.

“I was busy.”

“Busy, sure.” Jennie’s drawl has an edge to it that Jisoo cannot parse but nevertheless makes her bristle.

“What, can I not be busy?”

“The classes start today. Nothing to do yet to warrant being busy.”

“Well, I could be busy with other stuff.” Jisoo crosses her arms. Defensive, offensive—it’s all the same. She’s mad—at herself, at Jennie, at the ing universe. “I’m sure you are too, Jennie, with your pretty girlfriend.”

“Ah.” Jennie sighs, leans over Irene’s seat. Irene draws back, staying quiet, watching the two with keen eyes. “This is about Lee Hi, then, is it.” It’s not a question.

“I don’t—” Jisoo sighs too, pinches the bridge of her nose. “It’s not.”

“You should know better than to lie to me, Jisoo.”

“I don’t want to fight.”

“Huh.” Jennie’s stare is inscrutable, her eyes cold. “We’re fighting, are we.”

Jisoo winces. “No, I—”

But Jennie has straightened back to her seat, her posture rigid.

Irene catches Jisoo’s stare, as if to say, What the entire ?

And honestly?

Jisoo is wondering the same.

jisoo kim @kimchikin

have u ever ed up something beyond repair

seulgi kang @seulripper

@kimchikin once i destroyed my science project because i wanted a more realistic mountain replica but the materials aren’t compatible with what i wanted to happen so the whole thing collapsed and i failed the project then i cried

jisoo kim @kimchikin

@seulripper i don’t know what i expected from u but honestly #relate

seulgi kang @seulripper

@kimchikin did u just admit u relate to me omg is the rapture coming i haven’t confessed my sins yet

jisoo kim @kimchikin

@seulripper and there the it goes