“Hi boys” a whisper greeted them through the shadows as they arrived behind their door. Suga’s heart immediately clenched for that familiar voice, she was back, and she was gonna hurt herself again.

“How have you been?” she asked not stepping out onto the light afraid that someone is lurking around them. It’s been 2 years but NamJoon’s could still hear the fear in her voice though more mellow than the tremors it had before.

JungKook tried to find her through the darkness not trying to step any closer to her. Even V who was usually reckless had an air of caution to his movements

Someone wave under the big tree directly in front of Jimin. The boys eyes seems to adjust to the poorly lighted parking lot, her silhouette can only be seen if you look hard enough

“I think it’s a bad time to talk now” Jin softly said trying to save her from the pain she kept coming back to. Her chuckle seemed to shock the 6 boys while Jimin stayed rooted on his place, indifferent.

J-Hope almost took a step closer if it weren’t for Suga’s hand stopping him from doing so. She slowly stepped out into the light mesmerizing the boys, she looked healthy, happy even compared to the last time they saw her. Her hair had grown out and was up to her shoulder, rocking a rose pink color. It was the best Aera V have seen for the past 2 years and it left him with his mouth a jar

“I’m not staying for too long oppa, I just stopped by to say goodbye” she mumbles, looking at each of their faces except for Jimin. She grinned at them, trying hard to glow and not be consumed by the dark memories she had been suppressing since they’ve arrived. 

Of course it still hurts, she has lost the love of her life, and he knew but could not fathom how important he was, is, to her. 

“Goodbye? Your leaving?” Suga asked shocked. He couldn’t stop himself from glancing at Jimin’s reaction, which had a blank stare at her, almost like he had fallen asleep with his eyes open

“Yes, I’m going to London for Medicine School, I’ve put it off for 2 years already. I think it’s the right time to go for it again” she had been praying for a reaction from him but tried to not put her hopes up. She had knew a long time ago that he wasn’t coming back to her and yet she still tried to defeat the odds but she had put her life on hold for too long, it’s time to move on

The boys seemed to process everything she had told them, their faces full of shock

“London? But you planned on studying at SUNGKYUNGKWAN? You even passed your papers” J-Hope was trying to grasp her reasoning, of course the better choice would be to leave, of course she deserve to live the life she had planned before they came crashing everything she had.

She gave Hobi a sad smile, letting a little bit of what she really felt slip

“I think its better for all of us if I leave for a while Hobi Oppa, I’ll try to keep in touch though” she whispered to the cold midnight air. She inhaled deeply, sighing before grinning once more at all of them

“that’s all, I have to go. I haven’t finished packing my things at the condo” she let herself turn her back on them for the first time for the past 2 years. It felt good, she could make it on her own, she would leave her home and leave her heart and memories as well. She would be someone new, she would be better. Her steps were light and she almost felt like floating, trying to sort out the mess in her condo on her mind

“y/n” in an instant she froze. He just barely called out her name but it rang so clearly it made her stop her tracks. 

“can we talk?” Jimin asked feeling the members stare on him. 

She stood frozen for a few second before twirling gracefully to face him, forcing a smile on her lips

“I’m sorry… Jimin… I really need to go” her heart clenched as his name slipped out of her lips, flashbacks were trying to take over her and it took her everything to control her emotions and to keep the smile on her face intact

“it’s just for a little while” Jimin almost pleaded, shocking s. NamJoon tried to gauge her hold on herself, this is the most stable y/n he has seen from the last 2 years and it made him both sad and happy for her.

“We’ll go inside, I’ll text you tomorrow okay? We’ll talk about this going to London thing again, oh?” Suga wanted her to stay of course, she didn’t deserve her self exile, with everything that happened.

JungKook sadly wave goodbye at her along with V as they leave for their dorm entrance. 

She was still avoiding Jimin’s face, and was staring at the van beside him. An awkward silence enclosed them as the door finally shut closed.

“You know you don’t have to go right?” Jimin whispered softly

A fake laugh escaped as she finally let herself look at his face

“And pine for you here? No, Jimin, I’ve had enough with living with our memories alone” she poisonously spat. She had vowed to let go before coming here, it was unplanned and it surprised her but she went along with it. It’s been 2 years already and she was done

“No, I’m sorr-“ 

“Save it Jimin. I know, and I am too, I’m so sorry that you had to forget all the beautiful memories we had. I’m so sorry for trying to force you to remember. I’m so sorry you still can’t remember” she cut him softly. Of course it still hurts, how can it not hurt seeing his usual guilty face. His puppy eyes trying to take penance for his amnesia

He took a step forward towards her making her step back, away from him. She raised her hand in panic

“please don’t come near me” her façade was slowly slipping, her voice was once again full of tremors making her more frighten

“I just… I…” he stuttered reaching for her outstretched hand and letting his finger glide on hers. His breath hitched as his heart raced, he had always hated the feeling whenever she was near. It made him uncomfortable as his body reacts without his control, it made him feel weak and he had tried to avoid it at all cost until now. She stood frozen in her spot, her eyes locked on his

“I’m letting go Jimin… I’m letting you go” she whispered trying to get her together. Her demons trying to take over her once more

Jimin just looked into her eyes, letting himself be swallowed by her brown orbs that always seemed to be clouded with anguish

“I’m letting you go” she mumbled once more, slowly letting her hand drop but without thought Jimin grasp it more tightly in his. He could hear her breath hitched and a soft cry tried to break out of her but she held it. Her face white as a paper 

“I’m… I… I hope you’ll be fine in London, I really do” He didn’t knew where those words came from as his chest pained from the contraction his heart was making. It hurt him, every single time he say goodbye to her. It hurt him he couldn’t remember but he knows this much, there are things the heart knows that the mind cannot remember and yet it still hurts.

She let a sad sigh, almost like a sob. She took her hand away from him and let her gaze fall on to the cement pavement

“And I know you’ll be great” it had always been her spiel whenever he had to go to a recording or a schedule. It would be the last time she would say it to him so she let herself do it before turning her back on him and walked briskly away as she let go of the last strings of control she has over herself and cried never knowing that the moment her tears fell it reflected that of Jimin’s, who felt his heart break into a thousand of pieces, surprising himself.