“Hyung?”

                “Ye—yes,” Jiyong awkwardly choked out a fit of laughter, attempting to cool down the sudden thick tension engulfing them.

                He miserably failed as everyone inevitably gawked at him. Even Seungri; who had grown used to Jiyong’s rejection had his mouth opened.

                Seungri face palmed himself. How come the other members also gave the same effect to  Jiyong?! Boiling rage instantly filled him after his own disappointment of expecting too much. He stormed to Jiyong’s room and slammed the door right on Youngbae’s worried face, leaving the atmosphere to plummet even further.

                Daesung only looked at Seunghyun in complete loss, “Did I do… something wrong?”

                “Nope,” Seunghyun shortly answered as he pointed at Jiyong who had his eyes glued to the floor, “that butthead over there should have the answer.”

                Youngbae didn’t waste time to approach Jiyong, “Yah, what is wrong with you two?”

                The latter only shook his head, eyes unable to meet Youngbae’s.

 Watching this, the big brother Seunghyun stepped in and nudged the countered dragon.  “Yah, what is so fancy about your floor? You seem like a primordial man today. Just answer him.”

                 “I—I…” Jiyong stuttered. He bit his lips, “I—“

                *BAM*

                “I’ll make us all coffee!” Seungri suddenly burst out of the room. “Sorry, Hyungs. I shouldn’t have thrown tantrum on y’all.” He bowed and excused himself to the kitchen. All eight eyes only watched his shadow left.

                “Yah,yah, what’s wrong with your house’s atmosphere today?” Youngbae lightly asked as he flopped onto the couch, followed by the rest of the members. “I thought there’s something wrong when Seungri called me over, coming out there’s truly something wrong.” He took a magazine and started to flip it.

                “Should I help Maknae?” Daesung asked, half standing before he was pulled back by Seunghyun.

                “Just let the host do it. We better prepare some games~” Seunghyun whined as he placed his head on the crook of Daesung’s neck. “We’re the guest, remember?” he shook and Daesung laughed after the ticklish sensation the elder’s attitude gave him.

                Youngbae only rolled his eyes behind his magazine

                Jiyong immediately excused himself and left for the kitchen. As he went, he tried to compose himself; periodically chanted the same word over and over again.

                He entered the kitchen.

                Youngbae eyed him from the living room.

                Jiyong cautiously took a step at a time, stopping beside Seungri who was stirring cup by cup. Seungri said nothing, his face stoic as ever and Jiyong could see how hard Seungri was clenching his jaw.

                He suddenly felt small before his maknae.

                “If you come to help, stir the other cups. I’ll search for snacks.” Seungri handed Jiyong the spoon.

                Jiyong promptly lifted his head as he heard Seungri called for him. But as soon as he met Seungri’s cold eyes, he couldn’t help but shrank.

                He had always known how hard he was to be dealt with these past months, but now that Seungri had finally threw his tantrum, he knew he’d been a little bit too much. Yet, as much as he wanted to stop, he couldn’t either. His demon was in the end still greater. All he could do was nothing but threw his hands down in frustration.

                 He was a failure.

                And the man who had put Jiyong into all this mess was woefully still oblivious of Jiyong’s turmoil. Seungri’s face remained stoic as he ducked; having no more space to worry about the distracted dragon.

                There was only Youngbae who watched as Jiyong stared longingly at Seungri’s back.

                “Done?” Seungri turned at Jiyong, hand holding a pack of crackers.

                “Eh? Ye—yes!” Jiyong’s face immediately flushed as he thought he was caught staring at the younger who seemed to have lost his interest on him. He groggily took the coffees and brought them out with his maknae. Seungri’s face magically changed.

                Seungri was distributing the coffee with smile. He then proceeded to sit down with the other; all smiley as if he hadn’t clenched his jaw the entire time. Jiyong could only have his brows knitted at the way Seungri behaved.

                It somehow worried Jiyong the way Seungri changed so fast, he couldn’t help that his naughty hand secretly sneaked behind his back; reaching for Seungri. But, as soon as his brain took control, his hand obediently curled back.

                That action; Youngbae’s keen eyes caught and his nose smelled something odd.

                The game soon started and Seungri involved himself, everyone was taking and throwing cards; Jiyong, and Youngbae were no exception. They shouted, swore, and laughed together. Seungri even came to the extent of running across the room when he won the first round, annoying the eldest as the little brat he was.

                Jiyong unconsciously smiled after Seungri’s boastful declaration. He was chuckling when a sudden realization crashed onto him.

               How did he laugh? Was he giggling like a teenager in love?

                  No, he didn’t want to send false signals to the other.

                He was straight!

                He promptly pulled a straight face.

                The game continued and so later that night, Jiyong couldn’t decide where to focus his eyes. No matter where he tried to settle his gaze, his gaze would always end up laid on Seungri. Seungri seemed to always have something to distract him; the way his adam’s apple bounced when he drank his coffee, the way he childishly mocked Seunghyun, or even the way he rolled his sleeves. He was even currently drooling on the way Seungri ily his lips before launching his cards!

               The moment Seunghyun and Daesung shouted in desperation after their loss, Jiyong was snapped back into reality. He flicked his eyes.

                Why did his eyes be only attracted to Seungri? Even when there’s the other, he couldn’t take his eyes off the maknae.

                He couldn’t possibly love Seungri in a romantic way, could he?

                He hadn’t planned to break BIGBANG.

               He couldn’t be gay; he’s straight.

                Jiyong threw his gaze to the other direction. To his dismay, it landed on Youngbae who seemed to be able to bore holes on him with his glare.  Jiyong instantly backed away. 

               Did Youngbae just see what he did? Did he suspect him now?

               Oh no.

                Jiyong bit his nails and threw his gaze to another direction again.

                To his surprise, he met Seungri’s. Both quickly broke the eye contact as Jiyong made an abrupt decision to entertain himself with his apartment’s tile while Seungri to collect the cards. Jiyong only cursed under his breath as he knew Youngbae was judging hard.

                “Ah~ Seungri-ah, this game is no fun! You always win~” Daesung suddenly whined as he rolled on the floor. “Why don’t we play chess instead?”

                Seungri only chuckled at Daesung who soon received a headlock from Seunghyun after complaining.

                Jiyong right away got his stomach flipped once the adorable chuckle reached his ears. The chuckle he hadn’t heard for a long time; the chuckle that used to happen because of him.

                He felt his chest tightening at the sight. He confusedly clenched his chest.

                “Well, then you Hyungs arrange the board while I clean all this finished cups, How’s that sound?” Seungri offered which Daesung and Seunghyun more than happy to approve.

                “Our Seungri is the best!” Daesung exclaimed as he made two signs of heart with his fingers, happily lying on Seunghyun’s legs. His smile spread from ear to ear, leaving Seungri to only shake his head as he smirked and started to collect the cups.

                  Seungri left with all the cups and Jiyong didn’t waste any time to follow suit.

                “Ri.”

                “Hyung.”

                Seungri’s voice stern, “If you just want to push me away then you better back off. My mood is not in the best state. I’m physically tired.” He busied himself.

                Jiyong felt like being struck by thunder.

                Right, he didn’t have the right to be jealous, nor did he have to ask for explanation. He shouldn’t even feel that flip or knot forming in his stomach whenever Seungri laughed because of the members.

                Why did he become all work up just because of a mere chuckle?

                He didn’t know himself anymore. He was in the verge of spinning around when a tea spoon fell beside him. He instinctively crouched down and took the spoon. The moment Seungri’s fingers brushed his, Jiyong felt the electricity sparked and flowed through his vein.

                 It was an eye opener as Jiyong suddenly jerked awake. His gaze met Seungri’s.

                He suddenly noticed; Seungri’s eyes were dull, his brightness seemed to fade and his eye bags were more prominent. His dark circles had worsened to the point the younger seemed inhuman.

                 Jiyong felt like a wicked person.

                He brought his thumb over Seungri’s dark circles, gazing into his eyes. His skin was dry and Jiyong could trace his fingers over Seungri’s cheek bones. Seungri might not have lost as significant weight as he did, but Jiyong could easily tell bending his body to fit the small couch had finally brought its impact to Seungri’s health.

                He wanted to cry.

                Seungri had suffered as much as he did. He was the only one who fully understood what he had gone through. He was the one going through it with him; together crossing that thin line they were hanging on.

                Jiyong unconsciously tilted his head, and as warmth started to form underneath his eyes; he closed his eyes.

                .

                His hands cupped Seungri cheeks and he the hunger to devour him arouse, he needed redemption.

                .

                He brought his face closer to Seungri’s. Seungri didn’t move as his face hovered before his. Jiyong could feel Seungri’s breath and all the urges he’d been holding all rushed back to him.

                .

                Maybe, he should have just given all himself to this very man since the very start.

                Maybe--

                .

                .

                .

                “Don’t play me. I’m not sure I can handle well today.”

                Seungri peeled Jiyong’s hand and left.

                Jiyong was harshly smashed onto the cold embrace of reality as he was let falling onto the cold tiled floor.

                He felt utterly dejected. He breathed erratically and his fists clenched as he pieced the commotions earlier. His hands shook.

                Jiyong was doomed.

                He just—he just tried to kiss Seungri, didn’t he? A—and, he was thinking to give his all to Seungri, wasn’t him?

                No, no, he’s straight; as straight as a ruler! BIGBANG couldn’t be toppled by his own hands. HE COULDN’T BE GAY.

                Jiyong hurriedly steadied his breath and left for the living room. The members were all busy wearing their coats; Seungri was in the middle of the circle. Seungri was laughing and chitchatting with the members as if nothing had happened in the kitchen. Jiyong’s toes only fidgeted as he heard Daesung whines and Seunghyun playfully reasoned out with him in flat tones. Seungri on the other hand kept his composure well as he listed different restaurant names.

                “Hey, Ji, what are you doing there? Wear your coat. I’m hungry!” Seunghyun suddenly declared from the other side of the room, startling Jiyong. Every eye was instantly whipped onto Jiyong.

                “I’ll just pass.”

                “WHAT?! Of course you can’t, Hyung~!” Daesung carelessly flew out of Seunghyun’s territory and hugged Jiyong’s arm. “Come on, no buts!” Daesung dragged Jiyong, unaware of Jiyong’s discomfort.

                Seunghyun roughly put a hat onto Jiyong’s head and gave him a scarf as Jiyong wriggled out of Daesung’s arm. In the end, the leader didn’t have any other choice but joined the dinner.

                Youngbae’s eyes were sharper than ever.

                They finally decided on a nearby pork skin restaurant and to no avail, their dinner became the most torturous hours for Jiyong. The food he forced in felt like threatening to be thrown back up and Jiyong felt bad as all he wanted to do was rolling on the floor and threw his fit like a careless little child.

                He had his personal cloud storm was raging inside his brain; Seungri’s rejection bothered him as much as Youngbae’s judging eyes that seemed to never planned on sparing him. Summing up to his list, the way Seungri’s rejection bothered him bothered him even more.

                He was torn between wanting to reach for Seungri and made things work between them or sat down and be safe from the judging eyes.

                The customers didn’t help either as their gaze hovered on Jiyong as if he was some animal being displayed in the zoo.

                 He felt like hiding under the table and freaking out when they started to whisper. Did the customers think they were having double or even triple dates?

                 Oh God, no way, HE’S STRAIGHT!

                Jiyong was so tired that he’d never been reliever than he was when the member’s finally stood up from their seat. He was internally pulling his hair as he sensed eyes everywhere; aiming for him to satisfy their hunger for more scandalous news.

                 Even when the members bit their farewell, Jiyong was still off in his own little world.

                 He didn’t even see when Youngbae leant onto Seungri and whispered something right in front of his face.

                When Seungri let out an exaggerated sigh, Jiyong didn’t shift out of his daze. Seungri couldn’t help but sighed again in exasperation as he messed his hair. He his heel and stomped toward Jiyong’s room.  “I’m sleeping at my own apartment.”

                He grabbed his bag and prepared to leave when someone came crashing onto him.

                 A pair of arms pulled him and a bony chest hit his back.

                Seungri instantly froze.

                As hair tickled his neck and breath fanned his back, Seungri’s mind burst. Layers per layers unfolded and rushed in god speed, Seungri’s mind blanked and so the instinct took control.

                He melted as Jiyong’s burning hand squeezed him.

               He topped Jiyong’s hands and hoped the time freeze for eternity and as he leant onto the elder, he made his wish.

.

. 

.

                “Please stay with me. Stay by me, Seunghyun-ah.”

Hey, Guys, I'm so sorry for the late update>.< I was having a writer's block and kind of confuse on how to write this chapter. I hope you guys can enjoy this chapter and if you don't I totally understand. Thank you for all your subs and comments, they mean alot to me. Please keep on commenting as they are what pushing me to keep on writing. Feel free to point out my mistakes as that was why I started my account. Anyhow, thank you so much for supporting me.

I love y'all<33