“Rowoon!” A few boys call out his name and wave. “How was your break?” one boy shouts out. A couple of girls squeal and the others chatter excitedly like squirrels. I see the girl in front of me whip out a mirror to check the state of her face and hair. They all make me sick.

But what makes me the most sick is how Rowoon’s pointedly staring at me. Some of my classmates have noticed it and are looking back and forth from him to me. I want to groan and put my head on my desk. Just when I thought that my day couldn’t get worse…

The girl in front of me turns around and sneers at me. I almost give a start – it’s Haeun, one of the girls I used to eat lunch with. She turns to face Jaehyun. “I feel sorry for you,” she whispers loudly. “You’re desk partners with her.”

As much as I hate to admit it, it infuriates me. It’s not like I have some kind of contagious disease. But then I feel a slight pain in my heart, as if a thorn had poked it. Haeun would tell me jokes and try to cheer me up whenever I would rant about physics last year. What has happened now? She avoided me after the incident, but I never expected her to treat me like scum. Although she isn’t the only one who turned her back to me, more or less talk crap about me.

“Why?” I hear my new desk partner saying. “Why should you feel sorry for me?”

“She is a b****,” the girl says. “You see how nice the junior class president is? When he asked her out in front of the whole school she rejected him in such a rude manner.” I am tempted to throw my pencil at her – I mean, really? I was just being blunt. And how is he nice if he made everyone in the school turn against me? If that isn’t bullying, what is?

I struggle to coolly ignore her and keep my gaze locked with Rowoon’s, as if the person who looks away is the loser.

He finally looks away first and greets my new classmates with a superficial smile. “Hey, it’s been a while, guys.” I roll my eyes – there he goes acting chummy with everyone again. “How have you been?” Several people answer his question at once and the classroom is in a buzz. I glance at the clock. He can’t possibly stay for more than five minutes, can he?

I don’t know who to blame. Is Rowoon, the mastermind of this, the one at fault or is everyone, for blindly following him? I grit my teeth. I just have to bear two more years. Two years that seem like an eternity.

I glance at Jaehyun. His eyes are focused on Rowoon, who is speaking about who-knows-what. I bet Jaehyun’s going to be the same and ignore me for the rest of the school year. I’ll be fortunate if he doesn’t start being childish and steal my precious pencils or write crap on my notebooks like some of Rowoon’s basketball teammates from last year. Money doesn’t grow on trees, you know. Though I sure wish it does.

Rowoon finishes his little speech and waves as if he wasn’t the president of the junior class but the country itself. I roll my eyes – I’m surprised it hasn’t rolled backwards into my head ever since I met that guy. He saunters out of the room and I breathe out loudly in relief.

“Is he okay?” the peanut gallery whisper, loudly for my benefit. “After the incident with her?”

I sigh. It’s been at least four months. I’m pretty sure by looking at the state of him he hasn’t had a heart attack yet. Maybe his pride is still wounded, but really? Why do I end up as the antagonist?

I’ve heard that some outsiders eat outside at a quiet place under a tree. Some eat inside an empty classroom. Some even end up eating in the bathroom – whatever happens to me, you’ll never find me in the bathroom with food; that’s just gross. I eat on the roof of the school. It’s kind of ironic because heights make me somewhat clammy, but I like the peaceful atmosphere with the wind blowing around me. It also makes me feel as though I was on top of things. Literally and figuratively.

But today, I have an intruder. I narrow my eyes as I hear the squeak of the rusty metal door open.

My heartbeat quickens. I feel like I stepped into one of those horror movies where the main character anticipates a ghost or something to jump out at her. I hold my breath as a tall figure enters my vision and… What the heck?

“Hwayoung?” Jaehyun says my name before I say his. He looks bewildered.

Before I know it, a laugh bubbles up and out of my mouth. Jaehyun seems even more taken aback, which makes me laugh even harder. I don’t know why – maybe the anticipation that turned into relief decided to take the form of laughter. Jaehyun probably thinks I’m an absolute psycho now.

As my weird laughter subdues, I try to explain myself. “I’m just relieved it wasn’t… oh, never mind.”

I turn my attention back to my sandwich and patiently wait for him to start running away from the crazy person: me. However, he just stands there and stares at me.

“You’re weird,” he comments.

I feel a laugh tickling my throat, but I swallow it down. “What is the definition of weird?”

“Not normal.” To my disappointment, he sits down in front of me.

“What is normal? Everyone’s different. No one is normal.” I begin to wonder how simpleminded this guy is. The corners of his lips twitch and I look away.

It turns silent for a few minutes, save my best friend: the breeze. He’s just staring at me eat. I feel super uncomfortable.

“Do you have food? Here, you can have some of mine.” I offer him my bag of chips. He shakes his head.

“Take it,” I press. Take it and stop staring at me like that. Even better, go away. He takes the bag, opens it, and starts eating. All the while staring at me.

“Uh, I think you’re new here, but just to let you know, people here avoid me like Ebola,” I hint.

“Just because you rejected the school’s top star?” he says without missing a beat. I look up at him in surprise. Maybe he isn’t as simpleminded as I thought him to be. But then, after the incident with Rowoon coming into our class to give his welcome-back speech, he would have to be an idiot to not know my situation.

“If the other students know that you’re with me, you’ll be shunned too.” That was the reason why most of my friends left me.

“Who cares? They’re in the wrong for shunning you just because of a stupid little thing,” he says.

I stop in mid-chew. What? I lower my sandwich and stare back at him properly for the first time. His serious eyes stare back at me. Impossible. It was impossible to find someone like him in this school – everyone just went with the flow. Conformity is a big thing at this school.

Maybe it’s because he’s new and has a different mindset. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t understand the dangers of actually being shunned. Maybe it’s because he is naïve.

I close my eyes because I am afraid he will see the flicker of hope in them. It’s impossible – what feels too good to be true can be deluding. A tiny part of me wants him to stay and keep me company, but my brain chides my foolishness.

I don’t want to put my trust in him like how I did with all my close friends who snipped me off from their tree of friendship as soon as Rowoon’s influence grasped the student body. The countless nights when tears streamed down my cheeks with nothing but the darkness to comfort me… My heart aches. I thought the pain had dulled by now.

The faint ringing of the bell in the distance thankfully breaks the line of my thoughts. “See you in class,” I say. Hurriedly, I gather my trash and head to the door.

The day had gone pretty smoothly after lunch. No Rowoon, no taunts, and even better, no homework. I even manage to exit out of the building with all of my school supplies intact. No one even glances my way as I head home. I dare to hope that the drama is finally dying out.

Jae-in. I see her walking within three yards of me and I almost shout out her name and wave. Her long black hair disappears as she gets in the backseat of a car. She was my best friend. Before that incident, that is. The raw pain resurfaces. Why is it that something always reminds me of it when I finally think that the effects of it is disappearing?

“Watch out!” At the sudden shout, I become aware of my surroundings. I am three steps onto the crosswalk and the light is blinking at the number three. I look to my right and see a truck coming full speed at me.

It is true that at the last few seconds before death a person feels like the whole world is turned to a slow setting. The last thing I do before closing my eyes is berating my wandering consciousness.

Hello readers! I bet you guys have seen NCT127's comeback from a few weeks ago. I thought that Jaehyun looked the best in the music video and photoshoots. What did you guys think?

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