"Jiwon hyung, I'm sorry."

Those were the first words that came out of Chanwoo's lips when they met.

In the distance, Jiwon could hear the mindless chatter filling the wedding hall. Everyone seemed to be encased in their own agendas, waiting for the wedding rehearsal about to take place minutes from now. At the corner of his eye, he could see Lee Chanhyuk, Jinhwan's brother-in-law and at the same time the wedding planner, discussing something to the employees, his hands gesturing wildly in description.

"Jiwon hyung," Chanwoo called again, diverting his attention back to him.

The youngest among their friends fiddled with his thumbs absentmindedly, not quite meeting his eyes.

"Hmm?"

"I... I know what happened. I'm sorry, hyung. I should've listened."

Jiwon wouldn't lie; when silence consumed his thoughts, there would be times when Chanwoo was on the receiving end of his anger. However, Jiwon was aware that none of it was the youngest's fault. It happened with his own conviction.

Patting Chanwoo's shoulder, he sent him a reassuring smile. "Don't beat yourself up over it."

"Hyung, I can talk with her if you want—"

"Chanwoo."

"I mean, it's just a kiss, right? I'm sure she'll understand. And it's not like you dragged it longer—"

"Chanwoo," Jiwon repeated, his tone going deeper. It finally made his friend stop.

"It's not just a kiss. It's about the fact that I let something like that happen." He wistfully smiled. "Someday, you'll understand."

The young one opened his mouth, attempting to say something, when a loud clap interrupted his speech.

"Can the entourage get ready?" Chanhyuk barked at the mic hung on his cheek. He strode over the walkway, trying to out-tall everyone standing around him. With his straight posture, it seemed like so.

"To those included in the processional, please standby at the ballroom doors. We're starting the rehearsal."

Chanwoo gave him a look and walked ahead. Jiwon followed after, dodging several bodies slowly gathering outside the doors. When he stood in line, he opened and closed his hands in an attempt to calm himself.

It would be the day where his wife would be forced to be with him. Based from his friends, she was already in the hall, somewhere, just out of his sight, as if trying to avoid a certain someone in the venue.

His mind whirled with conflicted thoughts. He didn't want to see her but at the same time, he missed her so bad that a glimpse would be enough.

Before he could settle with a decision, he heard it, the slow clanking of heels against the floor. The footsteps were light, almost hesitant, the pace simultaneously matching the beat of his heart. The noise seemed to fade in the background. The silence between them hung thickly in the air. Even when he haven't seen who it was, he was sure it was her.

Jiwon did a double take as he saw the only person haunting his thoughts. Her pale skin glowed and complimented the pastel Sunday dress she wore. Her long black hair looked beautiful cascading down her back and some on her shoulders. Her lips, as luscious as it was, looked alive, with it tainted cherry-like red. However, the one thing that stood out the most was her eyes.

Looking through the windows of her soul, it always reminded him of a stormy winter. Unfeeling but defiant, it didn't fail to nip his skin cold. It was obvious to see that there was a blizzard storming in her orbs, maybe spinning in her head too.

As he was reminded of it all, he couldn't help but notice that the storm grew bigger. Maybe it was the cause why her eyes looked blank, when he knew it was far from that.

Something pushed her to shut herself away.

The thought frightened him. It was happening all over again, this time, with his doing. It hurt seeing her like this. All he ever wanted was to see her smiling, yet he became the reason for her tears.

Jiwon slowly raised a hand, trying to reach out to her. Just anything, to catch her attention.

She didn't budge from her position. With her silence, he retracted his hand. It already said a lot of things.

At the same day, during the night when he would find himself looking at the ceiling, Jiwon didn't expect to see the caller ID flashing on his phone. It was his wife.

As he slid his thumb over the green button, his heart raced. Numerous fears attacked his mind. He put the phone against his ear and hoped that it wasn't anything bad.

"...Hello?"

"Do you remember that day I said I'd cook you hangover soup when you came home drunk? Did you... Did you eat it?"

Jiwon creased his brows, finding the question weird. Nonetheless, he remembered that day very well.

"I saw it on the table but I was so guilty that I couldn't bear to eat it. That's why I left it there. Why are you asking me this?" He shook his head. "How are you, Jisoo?"

Before he could get an answer, the line went dead. He tore the phone off his ear and looked at the screen.

Call ended. Duration 00:10.

Did she hate him so much that she couldn't bear to say a proper goodbye?

He just sighed and threw his phone somewhere at the bed, finding his irritation towards her useless.

As Jisoo stared at her own reflection in the mirror, she noticed how much it became a mirror of her inner thoughts.

The dark circles around her eyes seemed to go darker. Her chapped lips looked dead, almost matching the color of her pale, unhealthy complexion. The scratches on one side of her cheek were beginning to heal, but it still left a scar.

Her sight drifted to the numerous beauty products laid messily on the table. Slowly, she picked up the concealer and took off its cap. She dabbed it under her eyes, making sure the eyebags were covered well. After the concealer, she didn't stop, as if possessed. By the time she became aware of what she was doing, her face looked radiant already, no traces of everything that made her look imperfect. However, no matter how much she covered up, nothing could conceal the things shown in her eyes.

Pretending wasn't her strong suit, but maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be too late to try.

She lifted the corners of in front of the mirror a lot of times, just to be used on how it made her cheeks burn.

When she arrived at the wedding rehearsal of her two friends, she tried applying what she practiced in front of the mirror to greet people she knew at the place. It was futile, she realized. Her air supply seemed to shorten with every move, every crinkle of the bags under her eyes, suffocating her by the second.

She rushed to a nearby restroom and locked herself on a cubicle, leaning her forehead on the wooden door, panting heavily. This way, she wouldn't have to pretend anymore.

A ring broke her out her thoughts. She opened her clutch to bring out her phone. Lee Hayi, the screen read.

Her thumb hovered above the green button. She wasn't ready to answer anyone yet. But then, she remembered she was here for a reason.

"H - Hello?"

"Unnie, where are you? The rehearsal's about to start. Chae's looking for you too."

"Uhm..." Jisoo looked at the ceiling and absentmindedly tapped her fingers against the door. "I was just in the restroom. Don't worry, I'll come out."

"Okay. Just come outside the hall. We're already there. See you." Click.

Jisoo breathed deeply. She had to do this to prove to herself that she was strong, that she didn't need to pretend because she didn't have to.

With a slight tug of the lock, she proceeded to find her way towards the exit where people gathered. The line of the processional consisted a lot of familiar people, making her look at the ground to avoid interacting with them.

She found her spot when she saw the recognizable build of her husband's body. He was looking at somewhere else, darting his sight from one location to another. Wordlessly, she went beside him, his pleasing scent of sandalwood and vanilla entering her nostrils. She didn't know why, but the thoughts screaming in her mind seemed to halt the moment she recognized that scent. Any indication that he affected her this way was hidden with her treating him like a ghost.

'You should be mad at him...' she tried convincing herself.

However, why did she yearn to do the opposite?

Every passing moment was like a blur. Jisoo moved like a zombie, her mind on auto-pilot mode. She did things she had to do, functioned like a normal human being, but there was a certain void existing in her heart.

A tap was felt on her shoulder. When she turned around to see who it was, she was met with one of her friends' curious look. She placed the empty water cup she subconsciously gripped on the buffet table.

"Are you okay, unnie?" Chaeyoung, the soon-to-be-bride, asked.

That sent her mind reeling, remembering that today was the day of Chaeyoung's bachelorette party. A happy occasion like this shouldn't be ruined.

Jisoo tried to lift the corner of . "Of course..."

Her friend intertwined her arms around one of hers.

"Unnie..." she called, in almost a whine. "I told you, right? If you want to let your frustrations out, I'm always up for lending an ear."

"I'm okay, Chaeyoung. Really, I am."

"That's just what you want yourself to hear."

That made Jisoo silent.

Sighing, her friend removed her hold on her and settled on grasping both of her hands. Her sight went past Jisoo's shoulder, probably looking at the rest of the entourage having the time of their lives at the rented private pool. She smiled and went on to meet her eyes.

"Don't try to pretend because that's just not you. I know you're not okay. But I'm here. I always am."

Her eyes were full of loveliness that would always make Jisoo's heart turn into a puddle. She was a lot of things, and one of them was having the ability to exude warmth without burning the people she cared about.

Already tired of playing charades, Jisoo engulfed Chaeyoung on a hug. Her lips trembled as she let the tears fall on her cheeks, not caring if some would fall on her friend's dress, and at that point, not caring about anything at all.

Everything made her an unfixed mess. Coupled with Jiwon's betrayal was the unexplained notions that recurred the past few days. She was afraid someone would call her crazy if she would attempt to share it with other people. She had been the 'unstable' one long enough for being depressed over someone who haven't experienced her first breath in the world yet.

Now growing aware of the situation, Jisoo distanced herself from Chaeyoung, making the latter stop patting her back.

She sniffed and hastily wiped her tears away. With a groggy voice, she said, "I'm sorry, Chae, for ruining your party."

"What are you talking about? This is like a wedding present. I get worried too much when you don't answer my calls, you know that right?"

Without wasting a second, she smiled, a genuine one this time.

"Thank you," she breathlessly replied. "Somehow, I always know that."

"Well," Chaeyoung smiled as she wrapped her arms around one of hers again, taking her inside the party. "Let's hope you don't forget that part."

-to be continued-