My Queen, forgive me.

But it was a lie…

I wouldn’t feel guilty of.

5:10 p.m.

The day was rather peculiar.

Rare in occurrence, so to say, as Jennie set her look just to caught glimpse on Lisa’s vacated seat. It was strange for Lisa to be absent, pining her on what happened. She’s curious, yes, but it somewhat worries her, unnecessarily so. That even though the lack of information was killing her, she doesn’t know who to ask, wary of the blonde’s lack of circle of friends. Fronting to her all the more that she…

Doesn’t know anything about Lisa.

Is she sick?

She was doing it again, getting distracted during their class discussion.

Her mind wandering anywhere except the lesson she should take note of. It was a change she didn’t expect that could happen to her. She’d become reckless, risking the only thing that was important to her back in the past.

It wasn’t all that.

It was one of those days she’d felt jittery for no particular reason.

The day was soon to end but she felt like…there’s more to happen.

She was a nonbeliever, a skeptic to even add, of superstition. That it was all made up as to scare little kids. But surely, she should mind it when three of those sayings occurred to her all in the same day.

Walking under a ladder. Check. Wrecking a mirror. Check. Spotting a black cat. Marked that as an accomplishment.

She shrugged it all off, that inquisitive feeling she felt, deciding it was just her own paranoia. Overthrowing the thought that something is about to happen or bound to go wrong any moment.

It portended a revelation.

Like the plot twist of a story.

The school bell then rang, loudly ringing with its undulating concord, breaking their teacher’s pace of discussion as it was effective on cheering her classmates, eager for their dismissal. 

“Settle down! Settle down!” Dara’s voice was only muffled by her classmates’ own clamor. She watched as her teacher abrasively crosses her arms and articulates with a stony tone.

“I have an announcement to make.”

The class finally fell into silence, intrigued and at the same time frightened of their teacher’s sudden change of tone. Dara tips her black rimmed glasses up and diverts her look at the back row.

“Seungwan?” Dara smiled at first, somewhat chastened in glum understanding, and beckons her to come forward.

Seungwan stood from her seat, meriting all looks from the class.

Jennie roved her a look, emblematic of her own bafflement on what she’s about to say and its importance that it concerns Seungwan too.

Seungwan stood at the front, smiles, and deeply bows at them. She held it for a few seconds then stood straight back up. She still bears that smile but somehow…

It felt broken.

“I want to thank you for being my classmates for the past three years.” Seungwan glances over them and purses her lips, thoughtful.

“When we were still freshmen, I’d never thought you guys will accept me because I came from a rival school, SM middle high. I didn’t expect it, for you to welcome me that warmly, it was then when I’ve thought. ‘Hayi’s right. YG isn’t like what the rumors would always say.’ That it wasn’t full of arrogant students, rather, it’s full of enthusiastic and talented students.”

Seungwan turns to them, bashfully resting her look.

“I’m…I’m glad I’ve made this choice and I want to thank you…for all these memories. For the sleepovers whenever we have group projects, for the laughs in our class discussion, and for simply reminding me that I’m not alone whenever we have difficulties in…”

Seungwan trails off when Dara imputed her with a valiant stare, challenging her to finish her sentence. The class’ laughter filled the room as Seungwan continues with a small chortle.

“You…you know what I mean.” She nodded slowly and looks up to the class once more. “I know we’ve been together for a short period this school year but I’ll always treasure it. Our last year together. Our Senior High.”

Seungwan set her eyes upon Jennie and ruefully nods.

“This is my goodbye.”

It was their rendezvous point.

The place where lovers would meet up after sneaking from their own place. A safe haven where they could relish each other’s company, lovingly baring their hearts to the other. A secret they only knew, shrouding it from the world to even see.

It was just like how Jennie first saw it.

She sets her arms against the railings of the balcony, hurtling her the sight of the multitude rows of flowers while the sun drips its flaxen light upon every petal, striking it with a dimming flicker.

She thought it was uncanny.

Its beauty didn’t distract her nor made her exultant like the first time, as she, could only feel…

The slow writhing of ache from within.

It deeply stung.

The betrayal of her prince.

She closes her eyes, deeming, wishing that it was only an illusion. It was happening again. How her trust would always be broken whenever she gave it out to the person, whom she’d thought, wouldn’t ever break it.

“Jennie…”

She steely rooted her eyes at the view, her hands gripping into the balustrades as she perceives Seungwan at her side. Jennie felt her shift, following her own line of sight, and utters her explanation.

Her excuse.

“Father wanted me to take over the company. He wants me to be hands-on on our company. He…wants me to oversee the operations of the head office. I’ll continue my studies there. In Canada.”

Seungwan sighed, adumbrating her defeat.

“I tried to convince him. That I…only want to stay here but he…wouldn’t listen to me.”

Jennie nodded, but Seungwan knows it was forced, so she tries to explain it in a dire and urgent whisper, her voice cracking in disheartenment.

“He’s my only family, Jennie. I…couldn’t lose him too.”   

Jennie finally rounded to her. She tilted her head and smiles, callous and unsentimental to her explanation. She closed in, and whispers shrilly against Seungwan’s ear, breathing each word in plain resentment.

“You’re just a damn liar.”

Jennie reels back and faces her, bearing her anger as her eyes glazed in a fury.

“I wish I hadn’t met you.”

She pushes past against her, storming off from her, but Seungwan held her still.

 “I wanted to tell you but – ”

“Then why didn’t you?!” Jennie shouted back. She retracts her hand with a forceful yank and clutches her uniform above her chest, her breathing becoming more labored as she forced the words to come out. “You…got so many chances…”

Seungwan immediately went to her side but she held a hand, restricting her in place.

“I…don’t want to add more to your problems. I hate it. Seeing you that way.”

Jennie shakes her head in mistrust.

“You promised me. That you’ll never leave me. That you’ll stay. And I…held onto that.” She lamented, pacified in a mumble, and bears her a slivered glaze. “But you’re…you’re j-just like them.”

Jennie reverted back to her old self.

A coward.

She’s about to run away again.

She swivels, desperate to get away.

From Seungwan.

From everything.

But for the second time, Seungwan clutches her hand. This time, pivoting her back with force, mustering a frustration she hadn’t known Seungwan could exhibit.

“Stop it.” Seungwan uttered lowly, uncaring of her next words.

Riled up.

Consumed from containing