“Sehun?” 

Kyungsoo his head towards his right and shuffles closer to where he thinks the other is standing. 

“I know you’re there. I can hear your noisy breathing.” 

The younger does have the tendency to sound like Darth Vader, especially because of his dental braces. 

Kyungsoo frowns and takes a step forward with concern when the breathing sound ceases all of a sudden. He thinks Sehun must have slapped a palm over his own mouth when he got called out.

“Are you really ignoring me?” His voice turns soft and a sad pout soon appears on his face; he’s playing his pity card. 

Kyungsoo hears a pathetic whimper –– he knows how effective his puppy face can be –– but halts in his advance when Sehun all but yells out, “Stop! Please don’t come closer, Kyungsoo hyung.” 

He clenches his hands hanging by his side a little tighter, not out of rage, but of tad anxiety; worry brought on by his inner demons. 

“Did I-I do something w-wrong?” Kyungsoo hangs his head in sadness at his friend’s rejection of his company. “Whatever it is, I’m sorry.”

There was a period of brief silence before he feels warmth embracing him, but only for a split second though because he hears heavy footsteps coming from the start of the hallway, picking up in both speed and volume. 

Sehun grabs the back of his clothes in his hug and releases Kyungsoo at once. 

“You did nothing wrong, hyung. Don’t cry!” He hears and feels the younger pacifying him before shoving a piece of paper at his hands in a rush. “This was stuck on your back. Please convince Jongin not to kill me!” Sehun sounds almost as if he is begging. 

“Why would Jongin kill you?” Kyungsoo frowns and his head in confusion because that statement just came out of nowhere. 

At least, his heart now feels lighter knowing that Sehun isn’t mad at him. 

“Oh my god, he saw the hug. Oh my god, he’s glaring. Don’t look him in the eye, Oh Sehun.” The younger mutters to himself under his breath. 

“I swear I love you, but not in that way, hyung.” Kyungsoo flusters when Sehun gives him another abrupt hug before running off after whispering, “hold him back, I’m begging you” in his ear. 

“W-What?” Kyungsoo spins around on the spot with his arms devoid of anybody to hold onto, utterly confused. 

“What’s going on?” He rubs at his eyes out of habit, and it’s moments like this that he really hates his disability. 

Kyungsoo holds out his arms in front of him and takes two measured steps to the right. A small smile grows on his face when he finds himself in front of his own locker, with the familiar charm hanging off the handle.  

The sound of approaching footsteps stop right in front of him and oh –– I know this scent! Vanilla, cedarwood and lemon zest. 

“Jongin!” Kyungsoo’s smile widens at the appearance of his best friend. 

“Hold on, hyung.” The other places a palm on his shoulder and gives it a gentle squeeze. “Give me a minute. I need to go kill Sehun. Be right back.” 

Kill Sehun?

“W-Wait, wait…” Kyungsoo makes a grab for Jongin’s arm as soon as the other’s words register in his mind, barely managing to hold the younger back. “Why would you ––”

“He hugged you when I told them not to touch–– never mind. I’ll be right back.” 

“No! Don’t force me to get my walking stick out to hit you!” Kyungsoo’s body actually gets dragged a couple of steps for Jongin has already brushed off his hands slightly in an attempt to run off. 

“Whoa, careful hyung.” Jongin holds him close for a few seconds when Kyungsoo crashes into his body, because he had pulled on the brakes abruptly. 

“There is no need to whip out any sticks!”

He grumbles half-heartedly when Jongin focuses on coddling him instead. 

“You okay, Soo?”

Kyungsoo feels like a small kid being checked over.

At least the other has dropped the idea of hunting Sehun down. 

You owe me, Oh Sehun. 

He has lost his bearings, what with Jongin’s stride knocking him off balance, and Kyungsoo hates when he can’t visualise his surroundings. Yet, with the younger by his side, the darkness isn’t so forbidding and scary after all. 

“Yeah…” Kyungsoo takes advantage of their temporary position to bask in Jongin’s affection.

It’s unspoken –– what he feels for his best friend. Some of his closer pals have long sensed Kyungsoo’s fondness for Jongin, and they have encouraged him to ask the other out, telling him how Jongin probably feels the same way because he takes care of him so well, but Kyungsoo has yet to harness enough bravery to confess his feelings for the other.

To this day, he still thinks himself not worthy to be with the younger. Also, he doesn’t want to risk losing Jongin as a best friend if it turns out that the other does not reciprocate his feelings. 

The all-important factor is that he might be gay, but he believes that Jongin isn’t from how he enthusiastically receives chocolates from his countless fangirls every Valentine’s day. So, there’s that massive wall blocking his path.

“What’s that you’re holding, Soo?” 

“Oh right, this ––” Kyungsoo remembers the piece of paper clutched in his hand suddenly, “Sehun said something about it being stuck on my back. I don’t even know what it is.” He feels around the note and brings it up to his nose for a whiff. There’s even a faint floral scent to it. 

Kyungsoo doesn’t see the small pout on Jongin’s face when he leans out of the latter’s personal space. 

“What does it say?” Kyungsoo also misses the slight hitch in Jongin’s breath when he smoothes out the slightly crumpled piece of paper and hands it over to the latter. 

He waits patiently for Jongin to read out what’s written to him since the words weren’t in braille, but the smile slips off his face at the prolonged silence.

“What does the note say, Jongin?” Kyungsoo repeats his question. This time, his tone was much colder and more defensive. 

Because he is no stranger to anonymous writings and silent mockery; it’s only natural that he thinks the worse of what’s written. 

Back in the day, when Kyungsoo was still but a budding child in middle school; when his life wasn’t yet graced with the presence of Jongin and other good friends who constantly shield him from possible bullying like how he is protected in high school now, being blind from birth had made him the subject of countless taunts. 

One would think the young would have more empathy, but Kyungsoo can be testament to the fact that even children can cave into evils bred by society. 

Small hands clutching desperately onto his walking stick, he remembers walking the hallways with tears streaming down his cheeks, not because he was lost, no, but because he felt lost and so alone in the endless chasm of sniggers, how his schoolmates bump into him on purpose, and their relentless name-calling. 

Kyungsoo remembers struggling to tear off the papers pasted on areas of his back that he couldn’t reach with his short arms; crushing them into small balls eventually and throwing them toward where he thinks the paper basket is; crying himself to sleep under his blanket because he doesn’t want his mother to find out and be sad, and because even though he couldn’t read what was written on all those notes, it’s not hard to guess what can induce the jibes of “where are your other two blind mice friends?” and “shouldn’t you just stay at home or at least, put a hazard sign on your forehead since you keep tripping us with your stick?” 

Those horrible words still serve a reminder of his shortcomings to this day. 

It is with the appearance of Jongin and the rest of the gang, befriending him on the first day of high school that put a stop to his nightmares that never seemed to end past him waking up with tired eyes at daybreak.

Over time, Kyungsoo has built sort of a resilience within him by hanging out with the populars, as the rest of the school calls them, learning to embrace his disability. 

But there still remains certain fragility in his mindset that come the day Jongin and his friends shun him, he will fall back into the grey that is his past and all the bullying that comes with being the odd, blind kid in school. 

“N-Nothing.” 

Kyungsoo is pulled out of his bad memories at Jongin’s flustered reply. 

“What do you mean by nothing?” He sighs, resigned. Must be something real bad for him to decide not to tell me –– a premature assumption.

“Tell me. Is it someone playing a prank on me?” 

I can take it. Kyungsoo braces himself for all the negativity. Curse words or whatnot that’s written on the note stuck on my back.

“Of course not!” Jongin denies vehemently, waving both his hands in front of the other’s face. At moments like this, the younger is glad that his best friend remains oblivious to the very obvious blush on his cheeks. 

 

Jongin grips the piece of paper in his hand tightly.

He’d only written it and sneaked it onto Kyungsoo’s back because Chanyeol and Baekhyun have gotten more handsy of late. 

Right now would be good timing for him to make known his feelings to Kyungsoo –– since the latter had asked, all Jongin has to do is open his mouth and declare he likes him, but when confronted this suddenly, Jongin falters and shies away. He persuades himself with the excuse that there will be a better opportunity down the road.

“It’s really nothing.” Jongin laughs awkwardly and wraps an arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulder, steering both of them towards the exit since school is out for the day. “Don’t worry your pretty head, hyung.” He knocks his forehead against the other’s affectionately. “Shall we go get ice cream?” 

The younger carefully folds his ‘confession note’ and pockets it, though his blush refuses to die down.

It was only after a pregnant pause that Kyungsoo finally says “your treat” in a monotonous voice, effectively ending that conversation thread.

“Okay.” Jongin laughs (a little relieved too) and squeezes the other to his side. “I’ll even buy you your favourite double chocolate macadamia crunch. Let’s go.” 

Kyungsoo doesn’t comment further that the only reason he likes that particular flavour is because it is Jongin’s favourite, and he knows the younger will always want to sneak a bite of his cone once he’s done with his own. 

“How was your day, Soo? Careful, stairs ––” Jongin leads him down the steps with utmost care and continues to recount his rather uneventful afternoon. 

Phew… seems like hyung doesn’t suspect anything. 

The younger gives Kyungsoo the side-glance and breathes a silent sigh of relief at the other’s unsuspecting facial expression. He’d concocted the ice cream distraction to steer their previous conversation away from potential embarrassment on his part –– him being forced to confess that he’d staked his claim on the elder because he was jealous of their other friends’ attachment to Kyungsoo, and he wants him for himself because, maybe, he likes his best friend more than a best friend should. 

I swear I will tell Soo my true feelings one day. Jongin vows, patting at his heart.

It’s just that today isn’t the day he grew enough balls to do so. Besides, he already has a date in mind. 

Too bad Jongin doesn’t realise he’s not the only one putting on a front –– Kyungsoo wills his face to appear calm, though on the inside he is fighting against his demons; every bullying incident compounding and crashing on him like angry waves in a sea storm. 

His mind keeps wandering back to that unknown note and spinning all the possibilities under a negative light. His past was catching up to him. 

Kyungsoo loses the battle eventually.

 

“You might as well go over, tell her off and pry her off hyung, instead of just sit here, glaring and chanting curse words under your breath.” 

“Who the hell does she think she is?” Jongin barks out and ignores Sehun’s teasing suggestion, finally letting out a soft, pathetic whine as he watches stranger danger (he coined the name only just) lean her head on Kyungsoo’s shoulder in boredom as their professor droned on and on about basic algebra at the front of the class. 

“Transfer student. Prof Jae introduced her seconds before you strolled in through the back door.” Sehun replies him in all seriousness; the thought that Jongin had asked a rhetorical question doesn’t seem to register in his mind. “Can’t say I remember her name though.” 

“And how is it that she has taken an instantaneous liking to Soo?” He narrows his eyes at the sight of stranger danger poking her index finger at Kyungsoo’s marshmallow cheeks. 

The strange thing was the elder not even fending her off. It brings to Jongin’s mind suspicions that they are somehow acquainted. 

It that their classes had fixed seating arrangements, if not, he would have pounced on the opportunity to sit beside his best friend slash crush. 

“Why not?” Sehun quirks an eyebrow. “I mean, Kyungsoo hyung is good-looking and has a heart of gold. What’s not to like? I’ll totally go for him if ––” 

“Don’t you dare.” Jongin cuts him off with a slap up the back of his head. “I’m still plotting your death for that hug. Don’t think for a second that I have forgotten your betrayal.” 

“Oh, come on! That was a week ago.” Sehun rolls his eyes dramatically. “Why don’t you just ‘fess up to each other already? I swear, you two are so stubborn, it drives all us third-parties up the wall.”

“It’s not so simple, okay? I’m biding my time.” 

The younger scoffs and ignores how Jongin’s forehead falls to kiss the desk with a loud thunk because they’ve just seen Kyungsoo bless stranger danger with his rare heart-shaped smile.

“Even Baekhyun hyung and Chanyeol hyung have had enough.” One of Jongin’s eyes flits to meet Sehun’s, to which the latter stares back pointedly.

“Why do you think they’ve been hanging around Kyungsoo hyung more often than usual these days, indulging in excessive skinship, etc.?

“Those bastards.” Jongin hisses out the words as it dawns on him that the pair had been intentionally making him jealous all these while. He can only imagine how foolish they’d made him look; how they’d probably teased and laughed at his expense when he had gotten all worked up because they had touched Kyungsoo too intimately for his liking. 

“Don’t blame your friends. They only wanted to give you the final push.” 

“Yeah, but what about stranger danger? Soo doesn’t need her to whisper what prof has written on the board, he does brilliantly well on his own.” Jongin growls.

Sehun falls silent for he doesn’t have an answer to that, or rather, he doesn’t have an answer he thinks the other would quite appreciate to hear.  

Jongin resumes his pouting at Kyungsoo’s back. 

“Sehun?” He prods at the younger’s arm a short moment later and receives a low hum in response. 

“I think it’s time I paste another note on Soo’s back. What say you?” 

 

Sehun was the only one paying attention in their group, hence his eyes widen considerably at the sight of Jongin’s grip tightening around his metal spoon. 

“Jongin…” He whispers the other’s name in warning. “Be nice!” 

That catches the attention of Baekhyun and Chanyeol sitting across from them at the cafeteria table, and the pair exchange sly, knowing smiles before turning in the direction of where the younger boys had been staring, specifically at the pair approaching where they sit. 

“This should be it.” Kyungsoo smiles when he stops in front of their table and tilts his face to the right, at the girl who he has led to his friends. “Jongin?” He calls out excitedly, knowing that the younger would now usher him to sit beside him, in the seat he would most definitely have reserved for Kyungsoo.

“I brought a friend. She just transferred to our school from Busan.” 

Stranger danger. Jongin glares.

At the prolonged silence, Kyungsoo frowns and leans closer to his right. Am I at the wrong table?

“Please tell me I haven’t been talking to an empty table.”

The girl giggles and flicks her thick hair behind a shoulder. “You’re fine, Soo.” It should be a normal gesture for females, but Jongin takes so much offence at the hair whipping. Also because she called him Soo, which rights should only be reserved for him. (In his own opinion.)

Jongin stabs a piece of his chicken with so much passion that the newcomer jumps a little before narrowing her eyes to study him curiously. 

“Hi guys! My name is Joohyun. This guy’s best friend.” The girl –– Joohyun –– jabs a finger in Kyungsoo’s direction. Collectively, Sehun, Baekhyun and Chanyeol’s head swivel to stare at Jongin whose left eyelid has started to twitch. 

It’s like the trio lets out a silent chorus of oohhh in their heads. 

Hellooooo, excuse me… I’m the real best friend! Jongin stands abruptly, metal legs of his chair scraping against the floor unforgivingly. He rushes to Kyungsoo’s side at once. 

“Soo, my honey boo.” 

A piece of half-chewed broccoli pops out of Sehun’s hanging mouth and rolls onto the table.  

Jongin coos in a sickeningly sweet voice and wraps a comforting arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulder when the latter jumps in shock at the sudden new voice; he even manages to shirk off Joohyun’s hands clinging onto his best friend’s arm. 

“Name’s Jongin. Soo’s best best friend.” He emphasises while talking down at the girl, delighting in the way a look crosses Joohyun’s face before she huffs out in annoyance. 

Baekhyun slaps a palm on his forehead and drags it down his face slowly because just how childish can he get?

They might as well be watching a suspense-thriller at the movies with the way obvious tension hangs between Jongin and Joohyun, the two exchanging intense looks over Kyungsoo who remains none the wiser to the silent battle happening over his head. 

Growing fidgety himself while witnessing the scene, Sehun pokes at his fallen broccoli and shoves it back into his mouth. Across him, Chanyeol shoots him a disgusted look. 

“Uhm… what’s going on?” Kyungsoo frowns and jabs at Jongin’s sides weakly. The younger yelps, more so because it tickled, and releases him at once, guiding the elder to sit down and helping him steady the tray balanced precariously in his hands as Kyungsoo shuffles forward. “I’m starving. Can we get to the eating, thank you.” 

He then spoons a mouthful of soup past his lips the second he sits. Jongin gulps hard when Kyungsoo next moans at the delicious taste.

“So you’re that Kim Jongin?” Joohyun settles down to the other side of Kyungsoo as well, forcing Chanyeol to shift away a little to make space at the round table. Her voice still icy cold, as with her stare. Kyungsoo doesn’t pay attention to her and instead hums around his spoonful of rice, the action itself and overall cuteness draws a fond smile out of Jongin finally.

He glares when Joohyun picks off a stray bead of rice from the corner of Kyungsoo’s lips though.

“Thanks.” Kyungsoo beams at the girl. 

Right. The younger breaks himself out of fawning over his best friend. I need to deal with stranger danger first. 

Jongin scoffs and opens his mouth to send a retort Joohyun’s way in a sarcastic fashion, but he feels the air withdrawn from his lungs before he could make the move because the other has retrieved a note from her jacket. The girl unfolds the paper and flashes it for all to see, with a quirky smile hidden at the corners of . 

Baekhyun chokes when sipping at his drink, having not seen this latest copy for himself yet.

 

Joohyun smirks and her head in Kyungsoo’s direction, (god bless the boy who is still enjoying his lunch, not at all bothered by the silence around him), as if she’s asking should I tell him? Jongin opens and closes his mouth, and opens and closes his mouth again because he finds himself tongue-tied. 

When did she take it off him? Goddammit. He’d only just affixed it on Kyungsoo’s back after the end of the last period.

“That’s why I told you to confess earlier!” Sehun whispers harshly into his ear. 

All Jongin knows is that the cafeteria (like the hallway) isn’t the time and place for him to spill the beans to Kyungsoo. 

“S-So uhm–– how do y-you two know e-each other again?” Jongin wants to slap himself for stuttering through his lines. He places a hand by Kyungsoo’s lower back and rubs in small circles, thumping on the other’s back when Kyungsoo suddenly chokes. 

Please put that away, God. Jongin puts on his best pleading look and dart his eyes between Joohyun and the paper she holds. 

“Questions later, please.” He mouths.

The girl’s knowing eyes light up at his very deliberate shift in subject matter, though she ultimately decides to humour him and hide the note, for now.

Jongin breathes easy again.

“You want more of that steamed egg?” He glances to his side, the look on his face softening when he sees Kyungsoo pouting, spoon still digging at the (empty) corner of his tray; he must have concluded there wasn’t any egg left.

“Here.” Jongin scoops the remaining portion off of his own tray and places it on the other’s spoon. Kyungsoo squeals gleefully and lifts the fluffy goodness to his lips quickly. 

“Thanks, Jongin! Love you.” The other blurts out and turns to blind him with a brilliant smile, stuffed cheeks and all. Jongin feels his heart skip a beat or two in his chest. 

It’s painfully obvious that he is enamoured with Kyungsoo. 

“You didn’t answer the question, Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun decides to take one for the team and poke at the lovey-dovey bubble Jongin and Kyungsoo had created around themselves; Sehun looked as if he was having a hard time stomaching his food. 

“How do you know Joohyun?” 

The said girl glances over at Baekhyun briefly as if considering to answer, but ultimately lets Kyungsoo take the older boy’s question. 

“We’ve been friends for the longest time. Since we were toddlers?” He turns in Joohyun’s direction for confirmation who nods at the rest. “Our families were neighbours and our parents were close.”

“Little Soo cried so much when my family relocated because Dad got a new job at the other side of the country.” She interjects, poking at Kyungsoo’s cheek teasingly. “Right?” 

The latter doesn’t even bother to deny her claim. 

“I guess I was quite reliant on you in elementary school and through middle.” Kyungsoo admits while nodding his head lightly, a sad smile grows on his face. 

Jongin deflates a little at that piece of information because maybe I’m not Soo’s bestest friend after all. He pouts and peeks over Kyungsoo’s shoulder at Joohyun, wondering if the girl was the one who had been in his current position, protecting Kyungsoo in his younger years.

“But now I’m back for good!” Joohyun lunges forward and squishes Kyungsoo to her side, the latter emitting a squeak at the suddenness of her overboard affection. “I’m never leaving you again, Soo. Never!” She declares in a loud voice and smushes her cheeks against the flustered boy.

So does that mean Kyungsoo no longer needs me? Jongin’s pout deepens.

“Stop rubbing against me, Joohyun.” Kyungsoo grimaces and tries to lean away from the girl, but it’s all but a half-effort on his part. He doesn’t seem to mind her skinship nor the attention that they were drawing from the rest of the cafeteria; perhaps Joohyun has always been like that since they were kids and he was used to all the physical contact. 

Jongin drops his spoon and curls more into himself. He feels like he’d just been thieved on (having his best friend stolen away) and then socked in the chest (having his heart poked at). 

Noticing their friend’s dampened mood and pitying him, Chanyeol nudges Joohyun’s arm and points at the sulking monster who has his bottom lip jutted out into a natural pout, and who was staring down intensely at his lap. 

She releases Kyungsoo since she’d already achieved what she set out to do, smirks victoriously and resumes her eating, . 

“Jongin?” Kyungsoo slides a warm hand onto the said boy’s thigh when he feels that the other has been silent for too long. “You okay?” He worries his bottom lip. “Are you upset that I ate all your steamed egg?” The elder then says in his softest voice. 

And just like that, Jongin surfaces from whatever hole he had buried himself in and clings onto Kyungsoo a little more closely this time. 

“Not at all!” He smiles now that his best friend was paying attention to him once again. Spying a smudge of mushroom gravy at the edge of Kyungsoo’s lips, Jongin giggles and dabs the area clean with a napkin. “You’re such a clumsy eater, Soo. If it weren’t for me, you’d be walking around school the whole day looking like you’re terrorising gotham city.” 

Kyungsoo scowls and takes a swipe at Jongin playfully. “Well, I’m sorry I can’t possibly see to aim my spoon right every time.” His words, though sharp, had no bite in them. 

Jongin knows that as well for he giggles and says, “Maybe I should just feed you from now on.” The elder hums and decides to play along for now, patting Jongin’s head when the other leans it on his shoulder. 

The other four occupants of the table snort and roll their eyes collectively. To be honest, Jongin is such a simple guy to please. 

“Have they always been so–– I don’t know, fluffy and domestic that it makes people squirm?” Joohyun coughs and leans to whisper to the other three guys. 

“You mean vomit-inducing?” Sehun corrects her, “All the time.” 

“And they’re not yet a couple because…?” 

He shrugs. 

“To be honest, we’re all sick of them skirting around each other.” 

Baekhyun and Chanyeol nod their heads in agreement. 

 

“You should stop with the pasting of notes on Kyungsoo’s back.” 

Jongin actually screams banshee-style and jumps back with his hand pressed against his chest, right by his heart. He takes a second to collect himself, glancing left and right at the nearly empty hallway; the only persons around were the students leaving his class, and then there was Joohyun looking all pretty, leaning against the row of lockers opposite his class door, apparently waiting for him.

One side of her eyebrows were arched, as if she was judging him for the scream

“Where’s Soo?” He clears his throat, trying to act all normal. 

The elder would usually wait for him to end class on Fridays before they’d head off to hang out, kick-starting their precious weekends together. 

“Sehun brought him to Baskin Robbins.” 

“Without me?!” Jongin’s voice almost breaks with the high decibel he reaches again. He grumbles under his breath for a few seconds after, undoubtedly cursing Sehun, before glancing up at Joohyun once more. “Then why are you here?” 

“I needed to speak to you alone.” She frowns and takes a step forward, facial expression unreadable, but Jongin braces himself for she looks kind of menacing. 

“W-What about?” He cowers and backs up, both hands raised a little in front of him. “You can talk from over there.” 

Joohyun actually rolls her eyes this time, but does stop as she’s told. 

“The love notes.” She takes out the piece of paper she’s kept all these while and throws it half-heartedly at Jongin. The other yelps and catches it before it can fall to the ground. He doesn’t know why there’s this part of him that so desperately wants to keep it up, as if he wants to safeguard his feelings and possible happy ending.

“Heard from Sehun that there were more before this?” Joohyun frowns and folds her arms across her chest. “I want you to stop pasting them behind Kyungsoo’s back.” She says it with so much force that Jongin misinterprets her intentions.

Because it sounds to him like she’s asking him to put a curb on his feelings of liking Kyungsoo.

“Why should I?” He scowls, and this time, he steps forward. “Do you like Soo too?” –– in that way, he wants to add. The green-eyed monster within him surfaces. Jongin has his suspicions from the way Joohyun tends to act all clingy when with Kyungsoo. “I-I won’t allow for it!” He hesitates a little because all of a sudden, he doesn’t feel confident of triumphing over her if it does end up as a battle for Kyungsoo’s heart. 

He doesn’t know the bond the childhood friends share veer more towards those of the closest siblings.

“I care about him, yes. A lot.” Joohyun acknowledges that part. “That’s why you need to stop… Your small excuses of confessions are cute, but the way you commit them, you don’t see that it’s hurting Soo.” 

“Hurting him?” This leaves Jongin puzzled. “What do you me–– why would I be hurting him when I like him? You obviously don’t know what you’re talking about.” He scoffs, downplaying the other’s words, as if he considers her to be spouting rubbish.

“I know because I was the one who sat through his many episodes in the past! I know because I was the one trying to comfort a broken child over skype all the way through middle school!” Joohyun raises her voice, so loud that the volume scares Jongin.

But what frightens him even more is that he hears the genuinity, he finally feels the weight behind her words. 

What happened in Soo’s past? Don’t tell me–– His head snaps up. 

“W-Was Soo bullied because he couldn’t see?” Jongin whispers in soft understanding. “Did they use ––” Did they paste notes behind his back too were what he couldn’t say because he finally understands what fault he has. 

Kyungsoo probably thinks the note he’d pasted on his back was a prop to make fun of him being blind. 

“He was tormented by it, Jongin. Every day.” Joohyun cuts him off mid-speech, her words in a way, confirming his suspicions. 

Jongin thinks back to when Kyungsoo had first discovered his note after Sehun had plucked it off the elder’s back and handed it to him. He thinks back to the way Kyungsoo had fell silent before his words became more defensive, before he insinuated “is that someone playing a prank on me?” 

“In fact, the sad thing is … I think he still is.” Joohyun continues on to say. 

Jongin wonders why he didn’t read between the lines. For someone who claims he is close to Kyungsoo, that he knows his best friend best –– the younger deems himself a fraud. He supposes why he didn’t notice the last time was because he was concentrating too hard on protecting himself from exposing his fondness for the other. 

“You get what I mean about the notes, right? That’s why you need to stop, Jongin. I’m not sure if he’s aware of the notes you’d stuck on him before this, but be sure it would upset him if he were to find out.” 

It’s too late then–– I have already hurt Soo. The younger hangs his head in regret and guilt. 

Joohyun steps in front of him just then and lays a palm over his shaking hands. She knows she has gotten her message across from the other’s reaction. Finally, a small smile graces her features as she stares Jongin in the eye.

“From one who cares so much about Soo, to another who loves him just as much ––” Joohyun says softly, “–– or even more.” She adds a subtle teasing smile at the end, to which a blush spreads across Jongin’s face. 

Jongin nods firmly. I will fix him, I swear. 

He is now more determined than ever to show Kyungsoo just how beautiful he is. 

 

“Oh, Jongin-ah… Why are you back only now? You missed dinner.” 

He looks up briefly before bending down again to untie his shoelaces. The dark cloud above him hasn’t seem to fade from his earlier conversation with Joohyun. 

“Sorry. I had an extra practice in the afternoon.” Jongin lies and makes his way over to his mother, kissing her on the cheek when she slides an arm around his waist. 

“Come.” She ushers him to the kitchen where a delicious smell lingers. “I’ll heat up some dishes for you. There’s a pie in the oven too, you two can have it for dessert ––” 

“Oh no, it’s okay!” He shakes his head and jerks it in the direction of the stairs. “I’m not hungry. Think I shall just head to bed.” Jongin cracks a small smile (he hopes it’s a reassuring one) when he sees a look of worry cross his mom’s face. 

“Had a bad day? You seem a little down.” She frowns. “Whatever it is ––” She knows she’s not going to get an answer out of her son when Jongin nibbles on his bottom lip, “Cheer up, alright? Kyungsoo’s waiting in your room, so go play some games or whatever it is that you guys always do.”

He was already halfway up the stairs when the mention of his best friend’s name brings him to a halt. 

“Soo’s here?!” Jongin whirls around to face his mom. 

“Didn’t you guys make plans for a sleepover? It’s Friday isn’t it...” She both hands on her hips then narrows her eyes at him. He feels so small all of a sudden. “Did you forget? The poor boy has been here for hours.”

“Owww! Okay, stop. I get it!” Jongin yelps and clutches at his after his mom rushes forward to smack him. “I’m heading up now, Jesus.” 

“Treat your friends better, you punk.” She calls out after him. “Especially Kyungsoo!” 

“You only say that because you like him the best out of all my friends!” Jongin turns back to stick his tongue out at her. You treat him even better than your own son. He grumbles inwardly. 

“Yes, but not as much as you like him though!” His mom yells back with a teasing lilt in her voice. 

Jongin’s jaw unhinges. 

“Can you say that any louder?!” He hisses at her before anxiously darting his eyes up to his closed door and back. 

“What a-are you even saying anyways–– wah, that woman really… wahhh.” Jongin is left flustered when his mom merely sticks her tongue out at him before slipping back into the kitchen. 

How did she know––. He frowns. Is it really that obvious that I like Kyungsoo?

~

“I can’t believe you ditched me for Oh Sehun and ice cream.” Jongin cracks a light-hearted statement when he enters the bedroom. Oh. A smile then grows steadily on his face at the sight of Kyungsoo curled up in his bed under the many thick layers because he is just too god damn precious. 

“J-Jongin?” The elder jerks a little at the sudden noise and spins around under his blankets before hooking his arms over their edge. 

“Were you sleeping?” Jongin gets the fluttering feeling in his chest again when Kyungsoo nods and sits up, with mussed hair, light imprint of his patterned sheets on his cheek and all. “Sorry, my bad.” He shoots out a half-hearted apology, one which Kyungsoo easily waves off. 

“No worries.” The other smiles and pats at the space on the bed beside him. “Had too much of your Mom’s lasagna just now –– the food coma must have knocked me out. What time is it now?” 

“Almost 8.” Jongin takes off his jacket and drops it on the edge of the bed before going over to the other side, where Kyungsoo had made space for him. There was a dent in his pillow where the other must have laid his head; it brings out a smile on his face. 

“Where did you go after class? Thought we had plans to try out that new waffles place?” The elder pouts and shuffles closer when he feels the weight of Jongin’s body settle down beside him. “I ended up babysitting Sehun at Baskin Robbins. He had so much sugar, it was a nightmare.” 

Jongin chuckles and pulls Kyungsoo down again so that they both are lying on the narrow bed, their arms encroaching into each other’s space. 

Neither seem to mind though.

“I had an extra dance practice after class for next month’s recital.” He doesn’t let on that he had spent hours holed up in the studio thinking about what Joohyun had told him, and wallowing in his own guilt. 

Even now, when Jongin peers down at Kyungsoo’s face, he hates himself for hurting the other. 

“I didn’t know you were coming over.” He fidgets when the other looks up at his voice; Kyungsoo probably doesn’t realise how close their lips are now with the turn of his head. “Sorry for making you wait.” Jongin whispers. 

The elder must have felt the warmth of his breath on his lips, and a pretty blush grows on Kyungsoo’s cheeks as he finally realises their position. 

“I don’t see why you have to apologise, but–– ” Jongin finds himself mirroring Kyungsoo’s smile as the latter dismisses his apology easily, “–– okay.” The elder shifts away slightly to put some space between them. 

“Are you tired from practice? Or do you want to play on the Xbox?” Kyungsoo offers, even though he wouldn’t be able to participate much –– their past gaming sessions typically consist of Jongin creating a ruckus when racing mario kart or picking apart opponents on super street fighter iv, and the former would always be egging him on by the side, “Kill him, Jongin! Uppercut, uppercut!” Kyungsoo would smile whenever he hears their successful attacks through the system’s sound effects. 

Jongin’s heart swells; he knows Kyungsoo only chooses the Xbox because the other knows he likes gaming. 

“Why don’t we do something you like this time, Soo?” 

“It’s okay.” Kyungsoo shakes his head lightly and smiles. “I like whatever you like, so you choose.” 

Jongin fights back the urge to hold the other in his embrace because just how can one be so nice and selfless. He stares at Kyungsoo who was staring not at him, but a tad to the right of his face, still smiling. 

Beautiful, inside and out. 

“You’re an angel, Soo.” Jongin holds the other’s chin and turns it slightly to face him straight on. “Know that.” He plants a quick kiss on Kyungsoo’s forehead before he runs out of courage to do so, standing abruptly afterwards as the elder stills. Jongin then walks to retrieve the Xbox from where he keeps it on his shelf. 

He was sincere when he called the other an angel, and Jongin hopes that Kyungsoo believes in those words too. 

“I’ll just set it up over here.” He clears his throat to break whatever weird atmosphere that had grown in the room since his impromptu kiss, and crouches down in front of his flat screen. If only Jongin looked up, he would get to see the hint of a smile playing on Kyungsoo’s lips. 

“Should we go with mario first?” He hands the other the console after loading the game, walking into his closet after for a quick change of clothes. “I swear to god, I will kill you if you choose princess peach for me again, Soo!” Jongin warns as his ears pick up Kyungsoo scrolling down the characters list, and pausing at a girlish squeal. 

He rushes out after tugging on a plain tee to find his best friend laughing to himself. 

“Pie’s ready, kids!” A loud yell from the kitchen below distracts him from tackling Kyungsoo onto the bed because he’d gone and chosen the female character for Jongin again. “I know what you’re thinking, son… I’m not bringing it up for you. Don’t be lazy, come get it.” His mom adds a heartbeat later. 

Jongin groans because it’s true; he was just about to open his mouth to ask his mom to bring up some slices. 

“Oh yay, pie!” Kyungsoo claps his hands excitedly. “I want a big slice, Jongin. Go, go, faster!” The other shoos him away enthusiastically. 

He lets out another long groan and pads over to the door. “Okay, I’m going already. Damn it.” Jongin pops his head back in the room after he crosses the threshold. “Do you want to clean up my desk in the meantime… We probably shouldn’t eat in bed.” He gives a quick glance over to said desk and grimaces. “Sorry, it’s a bit cluttered currently.” 

“Okay!” Kyungsoo nods and feels around him for the edge of the bed. Jongin only leaves once he is convinced that the other has found his bearings and could make his way across the room safely. 

“Mom! Kyungsoo wants a big slice.” He calls out while making his way down the stairs. “That’s nowhere near big enough.” Jongin says over his mother’s shoulder before sliding in to stand beside her at the island. 

“That’s your piece.” She hums, nonchalant while acknowledging that it is indeed too small a slice to fill a growing boy’s stomach. “This–– this is Kyungsoo’s. Be a dear and bring it up for him.” She then proceeds to hand him a portion that looks almost half the size of the entire pie.

Jongin whines at the injustice. 

“I hate you so much.” He complains. His words don’t even sound sincere, and his mother knows it too for she sends him off with a light smack to his . 

“Soo... My mom’s playing favorites again.” Jongin jokes while nudging open his bedroom door with his foot, hands busy balancing the two plates of pie. He stops short when he sees Kyungsoo standing in front of his desk with a blank expression on his face though, his hands holding up several loose sheets of blank, familiar, note paper to his nose. 

They were those he would use to write on and stick on Kyungsoo’s back; he’d gotten the note pad at a nearby stationery store and he was judged so bad for it by the cashier because it was the floral scented kind that girls often use to confess to their crush. 

One look and it’s obvious that Kyungsoo draws the connection. 

“It’s not what you think, Soo.” Jongin rushes out at once. 

“Why do you have these? I found them on your desk.” The other dismisses his comment and says with an unreadable edge to his voice, “They’re exactly the same pieces of paper as the one that Sehun found on my back –– the roughness of the edges and texture, right down to its thickness.” 

Kyungsoo has always had the habit of leaping to conclusions prematurely; always assuming the worse for himself. 

Jongin sees the accusation behind his best friend’s words, and he knows what the other is thinking and where he is leading this conversation to; it’s of course easy for him to misunderstand the situation

“Soo, please. It’s not what you–– ”

“That prank note was your doing?!” Kyungsoo turns on him with calm anger. “How could you, Jongin? I trusted you… You were my friend.” A tear slips from the corner of the other’s eye, and Jongin’s heart shatters because this is just wrong; all of it is just wrong. 

“I knew there was something not quite right when you refused to answer when I asked what was written on that piece of paper.” 

Jongin shakes his head frantically, but he can’t get a word in. “No, listen to–– ”

“I knew it was too good to believe that you guys wanted to be my friend. Why would you settle for less when you could have the company of anyone and everyone around campus?” Kyungsoo dumps the pieces of paper onto the floor and wraps his arms around himself, backing away from Jongin slowly. 

He was pulling up his walls again, and it is the first time Jongin has ever witnessed the other looking so small, so afraid. 

“He was tormented by it, Jongin. Every day–– In fact, the sad thing is … I think he still is.” Joohyun’s words ring loudly in his mind, and looking at Kyungsoo now, Jongin wonders if this is what she meant. 

He quickly puts down the two plates he was holding and goes to Kyungsoo, reaching out for the other with both hands. 

“Stop, Soo. That’s not true at all–– Whatever you’re thinking, just stop and let me explain!” 

It wasn’t a prank, it was just me staking a claim. Jesus! Jongin runs his fingers through his hair and pulls exasperatedly. 

“Was it funny for you? Seeing me walk around the whole day with a note pasted on my back.” Kyungsoo trips while stepping backwards, and Jongin’s heart lurches in his chest when he sees the other bump against his drawer. “I’m sure the entire cohort must have had such a good laugh, keeping it a secret as I walk down the hallway. If it weren’t for Sehun, I would have had it on me the entire trip to the ice cream parlor and back home.” 

The other was crying so hard, Jongin’s heart cries with him –– he wishes he could take away all of Kyungsoo’s pain and sadness. But then, he remembers that he’s the very cause of the other’s suffering, and Jongin beats himself up on the inside. 

“It’s like middle school all over again.” Kyungsoo whimpers and curls in on himself even more, hands reaching up to cradle his head. “I can’t breathe.” The other staggers back, almost putting himself at risk of falling out the open window.

It’s then that Jongin decides he has had enough and he needed to stop Kyungsoo from hurting himself further, both physically and mentally. 

He grabs the other by the arms and crushes him to his chest, and despite how hard Kyungsoo struggles, Jongin refuses to let go of him. He takes all the hits Kyungsoo’s fists pummel his upper body with and he ignores the tears and snot making a stain on his shirt. He begs for the other to hear him out, but to no avail. For a short period of time, Jongin gets his due punishment. 

“I hate you.” A wild swing from Kyungsoo strikes him up the side of his chin. It rattles him somewhat for he had to take a step back. “I h-hate you so much.” Another jab comes for his chest, but this time, like the tone of his voice, it was considerably softer than the hits he’d taken the few minutes before. Kyungsoo was nibbling on his bottom lip too, and he looked somewhat worried that he’d hurt Jongin badly.

That has Jongin smiling through his pain before he steps forward and takes Kyungsoo into his embrace once again. The other has stopped crying now and he looks tired from how he doesn’t protest and slumps against the younger; his earlier breakdown must have drained all of his energy.

“Now, you listen to me, Do Kyungsoo.” Jongin says in a firm voice. He peers down at the other who has his eyes closed and face pressed against the start of Jongin’s neck. He could tell Kyungsoo was listening though, from the way the corner of his lips quivers. 

“Don’t let your past haunt your now and future.” Jongin a finger over the other’s cheek. “I know about middle school... Joohyun told me all about the bullying.” He feels Kyungsoo fidget uncomfortably so he squeezes him even tighter. 

“But you don’t have to worry about being called names and being pushed around anymore. You have me, you have our friends. I’ll always be with you so you don’t have to be afraid anymore.” 

“But the note on my back…” Kyungsoo whispers, to which Jongin lets out a groan. 

“Yes! I did write that note and stick it on your back.” He admits. “But I swear it’s nothing bad, Soo. You’ve got to believe me.” Jongin says earnestly. “If anything, I blame Baekhyun hyung and Chanyeol hyung.” He blurts out. 

He slaps a palm over his mouth a second later, after he reckons he’d probably said too much and dug a hole for himself. 

“What do they have to do with it?” Kyungsoo frowns. “You tell me what’s written on that note now, Kim Jongin!” The other demands. 

“They were sticking to you and touching you all over the past couple of days… I was upset because my best friend didn’t had as much time to spend with me as I’d quite like.” Jongin admits finally, blush rapidly growing on his face. 

“What does the note say, Kim–– ” 

“Hands off. He’s mine.” Jongin shifts his weight on his feet and adds in a whisper, “And then I added my name at the bottom right in a smaller font size.” His voice trails off. He said it so softly, but due to their close proximity, Kyungsoo hears him loud and clear. 

“Oh.” The latter stills; he doesn’t even question the authenticity of Jongin’s reply, taking his word for it because why would he make up excuses like that? 

Jongin sneaks a peek down to stare at Kyungsoo’s reaction, and his heart beats faster when he sees the other trying to stop the corner of his lips from curling upwards. 

“See! I told you it wasn’t anything bad!” He quickly changes the topic. “So stop assuming the worse every time, okay? You are not weak because you can’t see; respect yourself and embrace your disability… Set your demons free, Soo. Know that each and every one of us cherishes you.” 

“You look tired.” He adds a second later. “Let’s rest.” 

“You cherish me?” Kyungsoo blurts out. 

Jongin guides them both over to his bed and helps the other settle in under the duvet, crawling in after Kyungsoo as well.

“Of course.” 

He likes the warmth of Kyungsoo’s body curled against his entire right side. 

“More than that–– I adore you.” 

Turning shy, Jongin presses his nose against the top of Kyungsoo’s head and slips his eyes shut with the intention to go to sleep. 

“It’s not that easy, you know.” The other says to the silence of the room. “Forgetting all the bad stuff that happened in the past… thinking it won’t happen again in the future. I admit, I’m still insecure. Sorry for my breakdown earlier, by the way.”

“I know.” Jongin swings an arm over Kyungsoo’s body to tuck him in closer. “But you have me. I’ll teach you how to love yourself, Soo. For now, let’s just go to sleep.” He lets out a loud yawn.

“Jongin?” 

“Hmm?” 

Kyungsoo hesitates. 

That has Jongin slipping an eye open in curiosity, and he sees that the other’s cheeks were pink. What is he trying to say? Why is he blushing? Don’t tell me he caught onto what I was trying to do when I told him I adored him earlier? Oh my god, is he going to say that he loves me back? 

The skin around Jongin’s neck was growing hotter by the second and he’s pretty sure his face is already an angry shade of pink. 

“I–– ” Kyungsoo clears his throat to begin with. 

... love you too? Oh my god! Jongin holds his breath in anticipation. 

“I’m–– We forgot about the apple pie.” 

Oh. His face falls, but he can’t even get upset because Kyungsoo looked too cute after passing that comment.

 

“Out of my way!” Jongin gives Sehun a body check and slides into the empty seat, grinning up at the other victoriously afterwards. 

Sehun merely flicks his eyes up to the heavens at Jongin’s childish display before he moves further back of the bus to find another seat. 

“Hi Soo!” He grabs Kyungsoo’s hand and gives it a light squeeze. The boy who was sitting by the window turns his way and greets him with a smile. “Off to climb another mountain huh? Can’t say I look forward to carrying you up again.” 

Jongin sniggers when Kyungsoo huffs out in annoyance before the latter crushes his fingers interlocked between their hands. 

“Owww…” He whimpers and shakes Kyungsoo’s hand off at once. 

“That was one time, and it’s only because I sprained my ankle.” The elder snorts. “By the way, was that band-aids I felt on your fingers earlier? How did you hurt yourself?” Kyungsoo s around for Jongin’s hand, and the latter yelps when he actually gets too close to his inner thigh. 

“I’m fine! It’s just small cuts, you’ve got nothing to worry about.” Jongin quickly dismisses Kyungsoo’s concern and settles back to find a comfortable position in his narrow seat. 

“My, my… what do we have here?” His head snaps up at the intrusion, only to lock eyes with a smirking Joohyun. “I’m a little upset that you didn’t save me a seat, Soo.” She pouts, while a smaller version of Jongin runs laps in his mind singing along to We are the Champions enthusiastically.

Kyungsoo tilts his head up and nibbles on his bottom lip apologetically. 

“Sorry, Joohyun. Maybe we can be seat-mates on the trip back to Seoul?” He suggests. 

Jongin shifts closer to Kyungsoo at once and glares up at the girl. No chance. Not in a million years. He mouths. Joohyun narrows her eyes at him and makes to open to rebut.

“You should hurry find a seat. We’re driving off soon.” He quickly cuts in. 

“Fine.” Joohyun huffs in annoyance and then prances to the back after saying goodbye to Kyungsoo. Jongin watches as she reaches the row Sehun was seated in before the pair starts to bicker, probably claiming ownership of the window seat (which Sehun was currently occupying).

“What’s so funny?” Kyungsoo smiles up at him in amusement when Jongin snorts. He’d just seen Sehun grow impossibly red in the face and turn flustered when Joohyun all but plants herself on the boy’s lap boldly.  

“Nothing.” He turns back to Kyungsoo and smiles. “Just Sehun embarrassing himself.” The elder laughs softly. “It’s a near two hours drive, Soo.” Jongin retrieves his earpiece from his backpack as the bus leaves the campus. “Want to listen to some music with me?” 

Before Kyungsoo even has time to respond, Jongin has already propped one side of his earpiece into his ear and leaned his head on Kyungsoo’s shoulder. 

“Sleep if you’re sleepy, Jongin.” The latter smiles and pats his best friend’s head. Jongin’s only response is to hum and snuggle closer. 

It was Monday and the start of the week also signals their school’s annual three day two night camping trip up Mt Jiri. Compulsory attendance meant even the likes of Kyungsoo (albeit under strict supervision), and the whiny cheerleader girls, have to participate. There are those who dread aching limbs on the climb up to the base, and those who loathe insects and sleeping in the wilderness –– those being practically the entire school minus the trekking club, but then there is also Jongin. 

For the first time ever, the younger anticipates this trip for he has something special planned.  

 

Jongin wakes to Kyungsoo’s soft voice and the gentle nudges at his cheek. 

“Hmm… That feels good.” He sighs and leans into the other’s touch, whining when Kyungsoo pushes him away.

“We need to go, Jongin-ah.” Kyungsoo coos, still the younger’s head. “Everyone’s gone.” 

Jongin quickly springs up from his seat when he realises that they were the only two persons left on the bus. 

“Let’s go, Soo.” Embarrassed, he grabs the other’s hand in his and helps him off the bus, all the while pretending that he hadn’t drooled all over Kyungsoo’s shoulder. Jongin knows the other won’t be able to see the stain, but he prays hard Kyungsoo won’t be able to feel it under his jacket. 

His group of friends greet them with raised eyebrows and muted wolf whistles when they approach with their hands still linked. 

“What were you guys doing? Taking such a long time to get off…” Baekhyun takes on the role of instigator-in-chief and starts the round of teasing, even wagging an eyebrow as Chanyeol sniggers in the background. 

Jongin snatches his hand from Kyungsoo’s immediately and stares down at the ground with flushed cheeks. 

“We didn’t do anything.” He shifts his weight between his feet and murmurs shyly, sparing fleeting glances up at Kyungsoo who looks very lost with the loss of physical contact. 

“Soo-yah…” Jongin flinches at Joohyun’s voice and frowns when the girl prances over to drape herself all over Kyungsoo. “The teachers wanted the seniors to gather over there.” She points in a totally random direction –– an obvious bluff; but it has Jongin’s jaw dropping, though Kyungsoo remains oblivious. “Bye Jongin, bye Sehun.” 

“O-Oh, okay.” Kyungsoo easily believes her and spins around slowly, grabbing onto the offered arm from Joohyun. “Bye Jongin.” The elder smiles sweetly before allowing the girl to lead him away. 

“Wait, w-wait–– ” Jongin’s raised arm hangs in the air after the pair’s disappearing backs. 

“Wah, wah… Just look at that–– argh! Joohyun even had the audacity to smirk and wave back at him. Jongin grabs at his hair in frustration, stomping his feet childishly when Baekhyun and Chanyeol laughs at his misery before running after Kyungsoo; he’d just had his best friend taken from him again. 

If she stays by Kyungsoo’s side the whole trip, how am I going to carry out my plan?!

“Why is that girl hanging all over my Kyungsoo again?” He whines and turns to Sehun, stopping short when he sees the other looking ticked off too. “And what’s wrong with you?”

Jongin claps his hands together. “Even you’re angry on my behalf right! Wah, I can’t believe that–– ”  

“Why is he holding onto her elbow that tightly?” Sehun blurts. 

Jongin blinks twice slowly. 

“What?” 

“Kyungsoo hyung.” Sehun turns to him and jabs a finger in the seniors’ direction. “Why is he hanging off Joohyun noona?” He pouts. 

Jongin’s jaw drops. 

“Noona?!” Since when did Sehun––

 

He had started a long way off the senior bunch, but less than half an hour in, Jongin finds himself holding onto Kyungsoo’s elbow and carefully guiding him up the gentle slopes. Joohyun and Baekhyun, who were originally assigned to be the boy’s caretaker, had fallen back once the younger had gotten to them. 

The cohorts had taken the beginner’s path, but there were still some loose rocks lying around; and Jongin isn’t planning to take anything for granted when caring for his best friend. 

He kicks away a rock standing in Kyungsoo’s path and pats the latter on the hand.

“You’re good for another fifty meters or so.” Jongin reassures him. “You okay?” He adds after spying the sheen of sweat littering the other’s forehead. “Want to rest for a short while?”

“I’m fine.” Kyungsoo exhales deeply and drags his feet forward. “Did I mention that I hate physical activities?” 

“For the sixth time, yes.” Jongin laughs before pulling Kyungsoo to the side of the path, allowing some of their school-mates to pass. “Hold on.” He digs through his bag and retrieves his bottle of water. 

“Here. Drink up.” He hands it over after removing the bottle cap. 

“Thanks.” Kyungsoo smiles and tries to catch his breath. Gulping down the water like a thirsty man in the desert, the elder remains unaware of the fond look Jongin graces him.

“Aigoo.” He pulls down the sleeve of his tracksuit halfway down his hand and dabs at the sweat around the other’s forehead. Kyungsoo doesn’t even pull away, instead he shuts his eyes and allows the touches on his face. 

The other looked so breathtaking, even with a flushed face and disheveled hair, that Jongin ends up staring a little too long. 

So plump and beautiful… if only I could just–– 

“–– Jongin? Jongin!” 

“What! W-What? Jesus ––” Kyungsoo’s voice breaks him out of his reverie, and Jongin jumps back once he sees how close he is from the other’s lips. He didn’t even realise he had been leaning in. 

“Sorry, Soo.” He quickly apologises for his lapse in concentration. 

“Is the view really that beautiful?” Kyungsoo chuckles, assuming that Jongin’s silence was attributed to him being distracted by the scenery. “We should be quite high up now, right?” 

“Beautiful!” He sort of ended up screaming it out because he had been thinking it when he was staring at the other, and when Kyungsoo popped the B-word, Jongin panicked. “Yes.” The younger coughs out after, scratching at his nape and beating himself up on the inside for sounding like an absolute fool. 

“Really?” Kyungsoo’s voice hitches before sadness takes over. “Wish I could see it.” The elder pouts. 

“Of course you can!” Jongin grabs onto Kyungsoo’s shoulder excitedly and steers him slightly to the left. “Right over there–– ” He picks up the other’s index finger and points, “–– is a really tall mountain peak.” The elder smiles as Jongin draws the outline of the mountain with his finger. “Is it because it’s almost winter? Most of the leaves on the trees are almost gone.” He frowns. 

“While over here–– ” He swings Kyungsoo to the opposite side all of a sudden, eliciting a soft squeal from the boy, “–– is a really sharp cliff. Give and take ten meters… I think you’ll be plunging to your death a step further than that, so be real careful.” Jongin whispers into Kyungsoo’s ear. “The sun’s over there–– ” He raises the elder’s finger and draws messy circles at a particular point in the sky before lowering his arm. “–– but we can’t really see much apart from the fog.” 

Kyungsoo whines when Jongin next tries to stretch his hand further than it can go. 

“Touch it! There’s some mist creeping in onto the path… It’s cooling right?” The latter was acting super enthusiastic as he urges Kyungsoo to try and reach for the low-lying cloud. Jongin totally ignores the sniggers and judging looks he gets from the students passing by en-route to their destination. 

“You know, you totally at describing things.” Kyungsoo finally puts an end to Jongin’s antics with a weak jab to his side.  

“Hey! I do not.” The younger pouts and reluctantly separates himself from the other. 

“B-But–– ” Kyungsoo must have registered the noise of Jongin’s soft mutters, “thank y-you.” The other smiles sincerely. “Thank you for doing that for me.” It’s obvious that he is grateful to Jongin for cheering him up and trying to play down his disability. 

The younger reaches for Kyungsoo’s hand and gives it a tight squeeze. 

“It means a lot.” Kyungsoo whispers.

You mean a lot, was what the elder wanted to say. Instead, he keeps quiet and allows Jongin to guide him back to the path.

 

“Soo.” Jongin tugs nervously on the edges of his hoodie as he approaches his group of friends sitting by the roaring campfire. “Can I talk to you alone?”

He sees his best friend picking up on his presence; the elder slowly turning to face him. But it isn’t Kyungsoo that first greets him. 

“Oh, Jongin!” Baekhyun pipes up from where he sits beside Kyungsoo, voice laced with obvious tease. “Is this what I think it is?” The senior tries to hype up the rest gathered by winking and jerking his head in Kyungsoo’s direction, and ever the enthusiastic bunch, his friends hop onto the bandwagon easily. “You’ve finally grown big boy’s balls and now you’re going to con––” 

“Hi Baek, bye Baek!” Jongin jumps in to yell. He glares daggers at the other before he folds his fingers to form a thumbs-up gesture, drawing it across his neck slowly and pointing towards Baekhyun thereafter. 

It was a meaningless threat though; the latter merely rolls his eyes, while across him, Chanyeol feints death on Baekhyun’s behalf by clutching at his neck. Joohyun observes the pair, unimpressed, but she picks up on the stare to the side of her face and turns, catching Sehun in the act of blatantly checking her out. The younger averts his eyes at once, cheeks flushed, obvious enough even under the cover of night..

“What’s going on guys?” Kyungsoo’s confused voice breaks the silence. “What were you saying, Jongin?” 

“R-Right. Hyung uhm––” He curses himself for sounding so squeaky. Jongin takes a pause to remind himself that he didn’t spend days preparing for this, months preparing his heart for this, to not have this occasion turn out as perfectly as he would have wanted it to be. Jongin clears his throat and tries again. 

“I wanted to talk to you, Soo.” He says firmly. 

“Oh.” Kyungsoo nods, but doesn’t make a move to stand. “Okay, what about?” 

Jongin looks up at the four pairs of eyes carefully following their conversation and scowls. 

“Would you like to take a walk with me, Soo?” The younger reaches out for his best friend’s arm and slowly helps him up, off the log. Essentially, Jongin wasn’t giving Kyungsoo much of a choice. 

“Now?” The other blinks and his head to the side. “But we’re supposed to gather soon. I think the talent show component is coming right up.” 

“It won’t take long. Please.” Jongin starts leading Kyungsoo away anyways. The elder must hear and sense the desperation in his voice for he does not resist. Jongin cringes when he turns back and sees his friends gesturing good luck at him. He hadn’t told anyone of his plan yet, so how did they come to know about it? 

“Where are we going, Jongin?” 

It has only been a couple of minutes, but it seems like they have already put much distance between themselves and the campfire. 

“You’re walking too fast. Woah––” Kyungsoo trips over a loose rock, one which Jongin neglects to warn him about. The younger was there to catch him before he falls though. 

“I’m sorry!” Jongin rushes out a quick apology. He was just too anxious of what’s to come to be paying attention to the other by his side. A quick look at the path ahead, and he knows it would prove a difficult task for Kyungsoo to travel comfortably. Jongin sighs (beating himself up for not being considerate when choosing this prime location) and crouches down in front of the elder. 

“I’ll carry you, Soo. It would be easier this way.” 

Because he was facing the other direction, he doesn’t see the shy look that makes its way onto Kyungsoo’s face at his suggestion. 

“I don’t want you to fall. There’s too many protruding roots and rocks.” He explains.

Kyungsoo extends his arms and lets Jongin guide him to hang over his shoulders and back. 

“Just how deep in the forest are we going?”  

“We’re almost there. I promise. We won’t stray from the path if that’s your worry.” The younger hauls Kyungsoo up even higher and secures his arms wrapped under the other’s thighs. “Remember the small opening we found last year? Right beside that hidden waterfall?” 

None of their schoolmates had been willing to walk so far into the forest, so no one else had uncovered the gem they did.

With Jongin piggybacking Kyungsoo now, they were able to make for their destination at a faster pace. 

Kyungsoo hums and tightens his hold around Jongin’s neck. 

“We can talk there.” 

“Why the fascination for that place, Jongin? If you wanted to catch me alone, we could have gone to the cabins. There’s no need to bring us so far out.” 

Kyungsoo exhales, tickling his best friend with the warmth of his breath against his nape. Jongin almost trips over his own feet this time. 

“No, it has to be right by that waterfall.” The younger states adamantly. 

“You know, you’re acting really weird, Jongin. What’s going on? I knew something was off when you said you needed to go to the washroom, but you were gone for almost two hours.”

“Do you remember what you said last year, hyung? When we were lying on our backs on the forest floor, with only the stars and moon our audience.” 

Kyungsoo falls silent. 

Jongin side-steps a fallen trunk and slows to a halt finally. To their left, the gentle trickles of water from the small waterfall could be heard. The younger tilts his head to the side and observes the way Kyungsoo still looks lost in thought.

“The trees look even taller this year, and beyond their peaks the stars still shine as bright in the night sky.” Jongin sets the other down. “You told me this would be the most beautiful place to f-fall in love.” He watches Kyungsoo closely. “Remember that, hyung?” 

It takes the longest time to get a reaction out of the elder. 

“What about it, Jongin?” 

Kyungsoo’s voice was a whisper that he almost misses. It also looks like the other has finally sensed what he is trying to do.

“I have something for you, Soo. Here.” Jongin pulls something out of his pockets carefully and places it between Kyungsoo’s palms. “I thought it best to hand it to you, rather than paste it on your back again.” He then steps back and waits with bated breath. 

The elder’s fingers were trembling as he unfolds the piece of paper. 

“This is a note, Jongin. You gave me another note… You know how I feel about this.” 

He can hear the panic between Kyungsoo’s lines as the boy recognises the material in his hands. 

“It’s nothing bad, I promise!” Jongin quickly holds onto both sides of Kyungsoo’s shoulder when he senses the other descending into his insecurities. “It carries the same messaging as all the other notes I’ve ever pasted onto your backs. You will know it when you read it. Go ahead.” He gives Kyungsoo an encouraging squeeze. 

“How do you expect me to read it?!” The elder yells exasperatedly. “I’m blind, Jongin. I can’t see. Why are you reminding me how pathetic I am?” Kyungsoo quickly breaks down.  

“You’re not pathetic, Soo. You’re beautiful.” Jongin clenches his hands and brings them together, holding it against his chest nervously. “Please read my letter. I made sure that you would be able to read it. Feel it.” He watches the other’s fingers traveling down the middle of the paper, and he bites his lips when Kyungsoo stills. 

“Please, Soo.” Jongin bites down on his bottom lip and waits. 

“You wrote this?” Kyungsoo asks. From the way his finger skims the surface, Jongin knows the other hasn’t really read it proper yet. 

“Yes.”

“But this is in braille.” 

“Yes.” Jongin says again. “I had to look around the internet for the stencil and watch YouTube videos for guides. My mom scolded me so bad when she found out how much I spent on it, but then when she knew it was for you, she smiled so hard and became practically another person. It was scary.” He shuddered at the memory. 

“You learned braille for me, Jongin?” He doesn’t know for sure what brought on the wave of tears from Kyungsoo, but Jongin hopes that it’s because the other feels touched. “Those band-aids on your fingers––” 

“I pricked them when I had to press down hard enough for the dots to make their mark.” He admits, cheeks flushed in embarrassment because it sounds a dumb way to get hurt. “Now, will you read my letter? I hope I got most of the words right.” The younger adds. 

Kyungsoo nods and wipes his tears away with a hand before investing his whole focus into reading. As the silence dragged on, Jongin grows more and more worried because had he wrote gibberish, or was the elder taking in his confession with a heart to reject him at the end? He can’t stand the anxiety, watching Kyungsoo’s fingers dance down the piece of paper, so he plops himself down on the ground.  

To Jongin, it was like time slowed down when the other’s hand holding onto the note falls to his sides. He see Kyungsoo’s mouth opening, formulating the words for his reply.

Please say yes. Please say yes. Please.

“You called me Kingsoo.” Kyungsoo complains in the direction of the waterfall for he doesn’t know Jongin had been sitting beside him. 

The younger blinks. Taken aback at his words.

What? Of all the things he could say––

From the way the edges of Kyungsoo’s lips twitch, it was obvious that he was trying to hold back a smile. 

Does that mean–– 

Jongin leaps to his feet and pulls Kyungsoo into a hug. The latter startles at the sudden contact, but soon leans into the younger’s embrace. 

“Am I dreaming? You read the letter right? You know how I feel about you?” Jongin smiles widely and glances down at Kyungsoo’s face. “From how you’re not pushing me away, I suppose you feel the same?” 

“I don’t know why you would want me, Jongin. You have so many better suitors––” 

“But none are you, Soo.” The younger cuts him off right away. He dips his face down so that his nose gets pressed against Kyungsoo’s shoulder. “Besides, what’s wrong with having you?” 

“Everyth––” 

“Nothing!” Jongin says firmly; Kyungsoo can’t even get a word out. “You’re my kind of perfect even if you have a sardonic knack of hitting me with your walking stick.” He jokes, worries and concerns lifting when he hears the other let out a snort. It was a signal that meant Kyungsoo finally letting down his self-depreciating thoughts and accepting his worth to be with Jongin. 

The pair settles down on the ground when it got too tiring to stand, much like how they had a year ago, when they had discovered this little slice of heaven. Jongin was his side, staring fondly at Kyungsoo, while the other faces the sky. 

“Am I still looking at tall pine trees and bright stars?” The elder asks.

“Uh huh.” Jongin hums. 

“Is the view still pretty?”

“More beautiful this year.” Jongin smiles. 

He wasn’t looking at the night sky or the waterfall when he said those words. 

“Wish I could see it.” Kyungsoo sighs. A familiar thought that renders the same response from Jongin. 

“Of course you can!” He reaches for the other’s hand and drags it till it’s perpendicular to the ground. “The moon’s right above us–– no, don’t point! Your ears will get cut.” The younger quickly folds Kyungsoo’s fingers down to form a fist. “It’s a full moon tonight.” He used the latter’s fist to draw rough circles in the sky.

“Are there many stars?” 

“Of course!” 

Kyungsoo bursts out into laughter when Jongin then tries to point out every single visible star to him. A commendable effort, but also a childish display.

“And that’s where the waterfall is.” Jongin swings Kyungsoo’s arm down and to the right. “That’s the top and that’s where––”

“I said this before, and I say this again.” The elder silences him. “You do at describing things.” Kyungsoo laughs, and he just knows that there must be a deep pout settling on Jongin’s features. 

“No, I do not–– okay, maybe I’m poor at it.” Jongin finally concedes. An idea pops up in his mind suddenly, and he decides to suavely adopt it. “But that’s only because you were asking me to describe landscapes!” He emits a little whine. “I’m better at describing people.”  

“Oh really?” Kyungsoo laughs. 

“Yeah! Hold on, turn to me.” He shifts closer and holds the elder’s face in his hands. “I’ll describe your face if you don’t believe me.” 

“Okay…” Kyungsoo giggles and decides to play along with Jongin, only because he finds it funny.

Jongin hides his smile. 

“You have really big eyes, and they’re deep brown in colour.” He starts off by tracing around the elder’s eyelids. The latter doesn’t even react. Jongin thinks Kyungsoo must have already known that. 

“You have really round cheeks as well, and they flush a pretty pink when you get shy or nervous.” On cue, Kyungsoo blushes at how fondly Jongin rubs at his cheeks. “See!” The younger exclaims. “I’m right!” He coos, only stopping when the other smacks him on the arm playfully. 

When the light moment dies down and seriousness settles in at the prolonged silence, Jongin still with his hands holding Kyungsoo’s face intimately, the younger finally touches on the topic he had meant to get to. 

“Do you know how I would describe your looks, Soo?” 

“Well, let’s see… big eyes, round cheeks, plush lips. I don’t know–– handsome?” Kyungsoo decides to humor Jongin by wriggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

“I was going to say boyfriend.” Jongin whispers. “You look like my boyfriend.” He cringes inwardly at how corny that sounds.

Kyungsoo’s smile freezes on his face. 

“You know, you never did give me a proper answer after reading my confession.” The younger nibbles on his bottom lip. 

“So, what say you, Soo?” Jongin traces the outline of Kyungsoo’s lips with his thumb. “Be mine?” 

He knows his heart will absolutely shatter if the other rejects him after all that had happened. The silence while he waits was scary. 

“Yes.” The elder breathes out finally before his lips curl up into a shy smile. “Yes, Jongin.” 

Jongin punches the air victoriously and doesn’t resist the pull he feels for Kyungsoo’s plush lips. 

The kiss was gentle and quick, but all the more memorable because it was their first. 

And it won’t be their last. 

(Not for a very, very long time.) 

 

⠊ ⠗⠑⠁⠇⠇⠽ ⠇⠊⠅⠑ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠎⠕⠕⠂ ⠊ ⠗⠑⠁⠇⠇⠽ ⠙⠕
I really like you Soo, I really do. 
⠍⠽ ⠺⠕⠗⠇⠙ ⠃⠗⠊⠛⠓⠞⠑⠝⠎ ⠺⠓⠑⠝ ⠊⠄⠍ ⠺⠊⠞⠓ ⠽⠕⠥
My world brightens when I’m with you
⠁⠝⠙ ⠊ ⠁⠎⠅ ⠍⠽⠎⠑⠇⠋ ⠺⠓⠽ ⠊ ⠓⠁⠧⠑⠝⠄⠞ ⠍⠁⠙⠑ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠍⠊⠝⠑ ⠑⠧⠑⠗⠽⠙⠁⠽
And I ask myself why I haven’t made you mine everyday
⠊ ⠅⠝⠕⠺ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠋⠑⠑⠇ ⠎⠍⠁⠇⠇⠂ ⠁⠝⠙ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠙⠕⠝⠄⠞ ⠓⠁⠧⠑ ⠞⠕ ⠁⠝⠽⠍⠕⠗⠑
I know you feel small, and you don’t have to anymore
⠗⠑⠍⠑⠍⠃⠑⠗ ⠊ ⠏⠗⠕⠍⠊⠎⠑⠙ ⠞⠕ ⠞⠑⠁⠉⠓ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠓⠕⠺ ⠞⠕ ⠇⠕⠧⠑ ⠽⠕⠥⠗⠎⠑⠇⠋⠦
Remember I promised to teach you how to love yourself?
⠠⠊ ⠙⠕⠝⠞ ⠺⠁⠝⠞ ⠞⠕ ⠃⠑ ⠚⠥⠎⠞ ⠞⠓⠑ ⠃⠑⠎⠞ ⠋⠗⠊⠑⠝⠙ ⠁⠝⠽⠍⠕⠗⠑
I don’t want to be just the best friend anymore
⠊ ⠺⠁⠝⠞ ⠞⠕ ⠃⠑⠇⠕⠝⠛ ⠞⠕ ⠽⠕⠥
I want to belong to you
⠠⠎⠕ ⠺⠕⠥⠇⠙ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠙⠕ ⠍⠑ ⠞⠓⠑ ⠛⠗⠑⠁⠞ ⠏⠇⠑⠁⠎⠥⠗⠑ ⠕⠋ ⠃⠑⠊⠝⠛ ⠍⠊⠝⠑ ⠞⠕⠕⠦
So would you do me the great pleasure of being mine too?
⠠⠺⠓⠁⠞ ⠎⠁⠽ ⠽⠕⠥⠂ ⠠⠙⠕ ⠠⠅⠊⠝⠛⠎⠕⠕⠦
What say you, Do Kingsoo? 




The End.

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