This was awkward. He didn’t know what the hell his brain was thinking when he agreed to come to Yixing’s showcase again. Like what was he expecting? Them talking and joking around like friends? But why would they do that when only two weeks ago he made holes in Yixing’s umbrella just so Junmyeon would have to share his (Junmyeon was never a fan of umbrellas, which came in handy as Jongdae enjoyed walking to home with Junmyeon and what better reason he could have than Junmyeon not having an umbrella and he sharing his). If it’s any better he did leave some money behind for a new one. He was civilized like that. Yixing’s payback was quick enough; the next day Jongdae found a bouquet of flowers on his desk with words ‘to the boy with the pretties smile and firmest ’ on it. Jongdae spent the whole week trying to convince Junmyeon that it was a joke and not an actual admirer, since Jongdae had, quite frankly, minimum chances of dating Junmyeon (thanks to a certain attractive classmate) but even this minimum chances would shatter if Junmyeon thought there was someone liking Jongdae. It was a tough week filled with Junmyeon’s encouraging words of finding the writer of the note and maybe dating them and Yixing’s self-satisfied smirk. If Jongdae didn’t want to punch him before, he sure did then.

These incidents didn’t really explain how the two of them ended up in the same café, around the same table. Jongdae didn’t know what to say. He spent so much time hating the guy, and here he was now drinking tea, as the guy quietly ate his cheesecake. He really didn’t know what made him agree to this. Maybe it was the shock of Junmyeon’s very tall and very attractive boyfriend, maybe it was the fact that both of them ended up on the same boat with their hearts crashed under their feet. Whatever it was it made Yixing invite him to his next showcase and Jongdae agree to it.

The showcase went well. Now that Jongdae wasn’t too focused on Junmyeon’s reaction to Yixing, he paid close attention to the way the boy moved. He remembered the last time he was shocked, but this time he was surely, undoubtedly, 100% awestruck. The boy was incredible. Yixing danced with so much power and confidence that Jongdae had never noticed before. Sure Yixing was confident when fighting with Jongdae for Junmyeon’s heart, but this was different. He owned the stage. His every move was precise and sharp as if he was born to dance and not to mention the body rolls. Jongdae didn’t understand how, but somehow in the middle of Yixing’s solo he felt hot and he begun fanning himself. The boy oozed talent and self-confidence and sue Jongdae but he was such a er for the type.

Okay, but it only applied to the dancing part, since as soon as he saw Yixing he didn’t know what to do with himself. There was the boy who a few minutes ago was humping the stage and looking, if he had to be completely honest with himself, y, but when he looked at him all he saw was the boy who pretended that his Korean wasn’t good so Junmyeon would stay after classes to help him out (Jongdae knew for a fact that Yixing’s Korean was decent, as he often caught him in the library reading classics). The admiration and the hatred for the boy confused him and he had no idea what he felt for the boy. All he knew was that he wanted to figure it out.

Jongdae congratulated him on his performance and Yixing thanked him before suggesting to go to the café they went last time. They didn’t talk on the way as neither of them knew what to say.

“When did you start singing?”

Yixing’s sudden question caught Jongdae off guard.

 “I guess since middle school? I sang a lot when I thought I was the only one in the classroom. Once Baekhyun heard me sing and basically threatened to steal my dinosaur-shaped pen, if I didn’t sing up for the chore and I took a liking to it.”

Yixing’s eyebrows rose in amusement.

“Dinosaur-shaped pen?”

Jongdae blushed. Maybe he should have made up something like always having a passion for singing or something cliché like that.

“It was cool at that time,” said Jongdae lamely.

Yixing, on the other hand, only became more amused.

“A dinosaur-shaped pen. Cool. In middle school,” deadpanned Yixing.

 Any other time seeing Yixing’s eyes sparkle with amusement which very often was accompanied by his lethal smirk meant trouble for Jongdae; this time though he quite enjoyed seeing it.

“Ah, let me live, will you?” whined Jongdae. “I really liked that pen. Also my nickname at middle school was Dino as I was very loud during basketball matches. My brother was on the team and damn me if I didn’t cheer the loudest for him. If it makes any difference, the pen had googly eyes and purple ink.”

Yixing outright chuckled at that.

“You know, the brother thing might have saved your dignity, but the googly eyes ruined everything.”

“Excuse you. The googly eyes don’t deserve this kind of disrespect.”

Somehow, the tense awkwardness which was over their table like a cloud, disappeared and they talked like two friends who met up to have a cup of tea together. It was nice. Maybe he wouldn’t mind doing this again.

Yixing’s chuckles quieted down and he looked at Jongdae with a look Jongdae couldn’t read properly. They stared at each other for a few moments before Yixing cleared his throat and looked out of the window. Okay maybe Jongdae was too quick in judging their awkward level.

Suddenly, a question popped into Jongdae’s head which had been there for a week now.

“How did you know that I want to study music? When Yifan asked you replied instead of me. How did you know?”

Yixing sat back and had a faint smile on his lips.

“I studied you.”

“Um… you do know how alarming that sounds right?”

Yes, he definitely liked hearing Yixing’s chuckle.

“A bit? I did tell you that night that I knew stuff about you. You know the whole know-your-rival thing.”

“And I remember telling you how scary that sounded,” he got quiet before coming up with the next question, “So what else do you know about me?"

“Well…” Yixing seemed deep in thought before continuing, “You sing well, your grades are pretty okay, better than mine actually. You seem carefree, but you are very attentive to your friends and you like taking care of them.You like clean people and you are very organized, judging that your best friend is Minseok and your crush is Junmyeon. You are also a romantic. You ruined my umbrella just so you could walk with Junmyeon under the rain. And you were singing Exo’s “For life” in the classroom, when you thought everyone had left and you were looking at the roses you gave to Junmyeon as a present for getting 100 from his chem exam. I still can’t believe he actually believed that excuse.”

Yixing was smiling. Jongdae, on the other hand, once again was confused. How the boy who he knew for a few months knew him better than most people from his class? Everyone knew him as the Dino Jongdae – the loud, whiny, talkative boy with a very obvious crush on Junmyeon. No one notice the details since no one cared enough, Junmyeon included. No one knew that side of him besides Minseok. Minseok and Yixing.

“What about me then?” asked Yixing sounding more unsure than he ever did. Jongdae wondered what was going on in his head at the moment.

“You are competitive and ambitious. You don’t care how many obstacles you have to overcome to get what you want. You are also very cunning and reckless,” said Jongdae without thinking much of it.

Yixing’s smile faltered and got replaced with a pained smirk (if that was a thing).

“So that’s what you think of me?”

He sounded disappointed and Jongdae felt like the worst human alive. He had to get that pretty smile back on his lips, but his brain didn’t corporate.

“Mostly. I also think you are a sore loser,” Jongdae tried to joke, but it only worsened the situation. Yixing averted his eyes and looked outside. Jongdae wanted to just bite his tang and die right there.

Yixing abruptly stood and without looking at Jongdae said;

“I better get going now.”

“Wait!” said Jongdae unintentionally grabbing Yixing’s wrist.

Yixing just looked at him with curious expression. Jongdae himself was curious as of what he wanted to say at the moment. Think, brain, think.

“I-I’m going home too.”

Yixing’s curious expression turned into a disappointed one just like a few moments ago and he pulled out his wrist from Jongdae’s grasp. For some weird reason, Jongdae felt even worse than before.

xxx

They were walking quietly again, except this time it was filled with tension instead of awkwardness. Jongdae wanted to fix everything but his brain was dead; there was only one thing on his mind – why Yixing was disappointed? He didn’t say anything offending and the last time when they had a similar conversation Yixing looked flattered with it, but not now. Now he looked as if Jongdae said something terrible and only his manners were holding him back from leaving Jongdae alone on the street.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that,” Jongdae didn’t exactly know what offended Yixing, but he felt the urge to fix things as soon as he could.

“No, it’s alright. You said what you think. You shouldn’t apologize.”

Again that sad smirk. Jongdae was a dickhead. He didn’t know why but he was.

They got quiet again and Jongdae started to think back of the conversation they had trying to figure out where he did wrong. And not long after it clicked. Jongdae was the dumbest person alive. How he didn’t notice it before? All Yixing said to him were compliments – telling him that he sings well, that he is a romantic and the teasing about the pen. It all made sense now. Yixing was flirting with him and he just unintentionally said that all he saw in Yixing was his ambition and cunningness. As if he still saw him as an annoying rival. Except Jongdae didn’t. Since the moment he learned who Yifan was he stopped thinking of Yixing as a rival and thought of him as a person who shared the same feelings as him. Someone who exactly new what he was going through. And now when the said boy spent the evening trying to make Jongdae know him better, Jongdae still acted and talked just like he’d do in the past.

On the other hand would Jongdae like to date Yixing? He stared at Yixing and decided that yes, he would. Now all he had to do was to tell the boy about it.

“It isn’t all I see in you.”

“What,” Yixing cocked his head to one side.

“I don’t see you as my annoying rival anymore and I’m sorry I sounded like that. It was meant to be a joke but I guess my jokes . Do you really want to know what I think of you?”

Yixing just nodded, but Jongdae could see his eyes looked hopeful. Just don’t screw this up.

“I think you are smart and interesting. I like your voice and I like hearing you play piano. You are very talented and hard-working. Also you look very cute when you get immersed in a book and how you sometimes try to muffle your laugh when you read something funny and how your face often changes expressions depending on what you read. And when you dance you are just incredible. You are born for the stage and even the previous time, when I came here with Junmyeon I was sure you’d win him because who’d date a mess like me when you were there with your dimple and perfect body and beautiful voice…” Jongdae trailed of not knowing how to continue.

Yixing snorted.

“And I thought Junmyeon would chose you, because no matter how much I didn’t want to, I had to admit that you’d make a good boyfriend; you are handsome and funny and you blush a lot which is very cute. Anyone would be happy to have you.”

Before Jongdae could decide whether or not he should ask ‘would you?’ a hand lightly touched his waist. He quickly turned around and saw Junmyeon and Yifan standing right in front of him. Yixing turned around too.

“Hey guys,” said Yifan waving awkwardly.

“Hi,” said Jongdae and Yixing at the same time.

“It’s so nice seeing you here. Were you leaving the café? We are just going in. I should have brought you two here sooner. This is a perfect place for a date,” said Junmyeon quickly.

“A date?” asked Jongdae.

“Oh come on. I’m not that stupid, alright. You think I didn’t notice the notes you kept passing to each other, and the smirks and the winks that accompanied them. Honestly, you weren’t even trying to hide it.”

Was it what it looked like from aside?

“And how can I forget all the times Yixing asked me what I knew about you or why you weren’t with me? And the same with you Jongdae; you always asked about Yixing and you were always the first to notice him in the crowd. Also there was a certain bouquet and a note involved which I clearly saw being put on your desk by Yixing. I’m pretty sure I got invited to the showcase only because I was next to Jongdae and it would have been rude not to invite me too. You guys have been around each other since day one. I may be a bit oblivious but not to that extent. ”

Now that he thought of it, Junmyeon made sense. If his two friends kept asking about each other and passed notes (not to mention the winks and smirks, and even the one time he sent a flying kiss to Yixing) he would definitely think they were dating.

“I don’t understand why you wouldn’t tell me, though. I was so happy for you guys. Jongdae has been single as long as I know him and it’s so nice that he finally found a boyfriend, especially as kind and attentive as Yixing. And Yixing has a hard time being away from home. Now that you guys have each other, I’ll be less worried for you,” Junmyeon sounded even more mum-like than he usually did.

Yixing and Jongdae both looked at each other. They didn’t know how long they stared before they heard Yifan's voice.

“We better leave them alone. It’s their honeymoon phase. Also our table is waiting for us,” said Yifan before escorting Junmyeon to the direction of the café.

They still stared at each other, both immersed in their thoughts.

“I still like Junmyeon,” said Jongdae.

“Oh,” said Yixing looking down.

“No, I don’t mean that I’ll continue to have a crush on him, I just mean that I need some more time. I’ve had a crush on him since middle school and it can’t just go away in a week or two. I know he has a boyfriend and I never stood a chance, but my feelings are a different thing. I can’t control them. I don’t have an on and off switch on my heart. And I’m sure you feel like it too.”

He paused trying to catch Yixing’s emotions. Yixing looked him in the eye before nodding slowly.

“But I’d like to try.”

“Try what?”

“Dating you. If you don’t mind it, that is.”

Yixing opened his mouth and closed it again.

“Before you say anything, I know that you were flirting with me back then. Or you just seemed to. Anyways, I know you long enough that you didn’t invite me here or to your showcase just to simply find someone to replace Junmyeon. Am I right?” Jongdae hoped he sounded sure, but he was awfully terrified of having read this wrong.

“You are right. I didn’t invite you to my showcase because I had no one else to. It’s just after spending so much time trying to understand you better and being concentrated on you, I kinda started to like you a bit?,” Yixing lightly blushed at this. “Like everything I found out about you, made me think you are a great person and even if I tried to deny it I really thought Junmyeon would be happy with a guy like you.”

“Well the good news is I kinda like you too. No matter how much your smirks annoyed me I always thought you looked exceptionally handsome when you were smirking at me across the classroom. And I notice how much you put yourself in everything you do. I always admired that. And what I’m trying to say is that I would like to date you and not because I want to forget about Junmyeon, but because I like you as a person,” said Jongdae.

“Alright,” said Yixing beaming.

“That’s it? I pour my souls into this and it’s all you can say?” lightly scolded Jongdae.

“I already told you all I wanted to. I like you and I’d like to date you.”

“Now this is what a call a proper answer,” Jongdae was beaming too. He wondered if his cheeks would tear apart if he continued to.

Yixing took his hand in his and escorted him home. When Jongdae reached home, he went inside not forgetting to kiss Yixing’s cheek. When he looked through the window and saw the awestruck Yixing with his hand on the cheek Jongdae just kissed, Jongdae felt that falling in love with the Chinese boy would be much easier than he thought.