Tuesday night found Junhoe perched on a plastic chair, eyes on a group of little kids who were dressed up in various costumes and learning some song in English about witches. Hanbyul was one of the kids. Junhoe was here because Hanbin had ered him into coming along, bribing him with the promise of barbeque after. Hanbin’s parents had enrolled Hanbyul in classes at a private English school and they were throwing a special Halloween party for the kids; since most of the teachers were North American, they were introducing the students to trick-or-treating, getting them dressed up and taking them around to different classrooms to collect candy.

Junhoe thought it was cute, but he’d never tell Hanbin that. Instead he’d complained almost the whole time, playing the “best friend victim” card. Besides, he and Hanbin hadn’t had a chance to talk about the weekend yet, and Junhoe was dying to tell him about his exploits with Jinhwan. After the shower they’d had some late dinner and then watched a movie before falling asleep together in Junhoe’s bed. It had been nice waking up with Jinhwan plastered to his back. Nice, but ultimately frustrating. 

But then Jinhwan had woken up and they’d ed again, and that had made up for any confusion Junhoe was feeling. 

His eyes wandered back to the kids, watching as Hanbin made the final adjustments to Hanbyul’s outfit. She was dressed in all yellow with a purple wig, a sun princess,apparently (Junhoe wasn’t about to argue the purple hair not fitting the theme) and once Hanbin finished with her he came back to sit down next to Junhoe. The kids were starting their parade from room to room, which would end in the large main hall area where they were going to sing their Halloween songs together. 

Hanbin had told him they could just hang out in the empty classroom and wait, and Junhoe was patiently counting down the seconds until the kids were gone. 

“So, you said you had some news,” Hanbin began, “it better be worth my time.” 

Junhoe frowned at him and would have hit him, had it not been for the kids. “My news is always worth your time, loser. You should be grateful, because I actually haven’t told anyone else about this yet.” 

“If by grateful you mean, so excited I’m going to go run into traffic, then you’re correct.” Hanbin replied, smiling excitedly at Hanbyul and her classmates who were waving goodbye. “Ah, they’re so cute.” 

“Let’s hope she stays cute, though I don’t have my hopes too high since she looks like you.” Junhoe replied, getting the jab in while Hanbin couldn’t hit him. 

“Speak for yourself, okay? Bobby tells me I’m cute every day.” 

“Yeah well love is blind, right?” Junhoe grinned at Hanbin’s look of aggravation. 

“In your case love must be deaf, too, since your mom still loves you.” 

Junhoe frowned at the retort. “My mom says I have the voice of an angel, okay?” 

“I think she’s talking about the devil,” Hanbin teased back, “wasn’t he a fallen angel?” 

“Speaking of the devil, I had with Jinhwan hyung on the weekend.” Junhoe hadn’t meant to just blurt it out so quickly, but he couldn’t resist the jab, even though Jinhwan wasn’t even here. The shocked look on Hanbin’s face was worth it, though. 

“You did? How was it?” 

Junhoe shrugged, not about to give Hanbin too much information. “Eh, it was cool.” He knew it would drive him crazy. 

“Just cool? Couldn’t have been that good, then. Which I’m sure was entirely your fault.” Hanbin teased back, but in reality he was shocked. Amused, too, that they’d both had at the same time without knowing about it. 

“It was excellent, I’ll have you know,” Junhoe replied, a touch of defensiveness in his tone. God, he just couldn’t help himself when Hanbin played him like that, could he? 

Hanbin smiled and nodded. “I’m sure it was, for you.” He pulled his phone out and started typing a message. 

Junhow narrowed his eyes and tried to see who he was messaging. “What are you doing? We’re having a conversation, Hanbin, put your phone away it’s rude.” 

Hanbin grinned and finished writing the message before looking up at Junhoe. “I’m sending hyung my deepest condolences.” 

“You didn’t send anything did you? Hanbin you can’t!” Junhoe made a grab for his phone. 

“What? Why not? It wasn’t really terrible, was it?” Hanbin hadn’t sent the message yet, and he held his phone out of Junhoe’s reach. 

“He doesn’t know that you know!” Junhoe replied, serious eyes meeting Hanbin’s amused ones. “We weren’t going to tell anyone, and I haven’t told him that I told you.” Junhoe had meant to mention it on the weekend, on Sunday, but that second round had wiped his mind of his plans. 

“Oh come on, I’m sure he realizes that I know,” Hanbin replied, “does he think you’d really keep your news to yourself?” Hanbin thought it was cute, the way that Junhoe was worried about Jinhwan finding out that he knew. Hanbin was sure he wouldn’t care. Junhoe was just being overly dramatic. 

“Hanbin, I wanted to tell him myself, so don’t ruin this for me.” 

Hanbin just grinned at him. “Nothing is going to get ruined, calm down.” He hit the send button on his app, and his message sent. -beloved hyung, my deepest condolences for having with junhoe. if you need someone to talk to, know that i’m here for you in your time of need!- 

Junhoe’s face went blank. Hanbin had actually sent it. What would Jinhwan think? Would he be pissed? He was tempted to take out his own phone and type a hurried apology, sure that Jinhwan would be annoyed with him for letting their secret slip. 

But seconds later a beaming Hanbin was shoving his phone in Junhoe’s face. “See, calm yourself, he doesn’t care.” 

-so thoughtful!! your a good kid kim hanbin! but im good it was actually awesome, i know shocking right?? tell him that hyung says he was really impressive kk ;)- 

Junhoe read the message over, feeling a little better about it. Even a little proud at Jinhwan’s words. Really impressive. Then again Jinhwan wouldn’t act upset in response to Hanbin, would he? Maybe he should still apologize to him. His thoughts were interrupted by another message from Jinhwan. 

-fyi bobs bein grossss about u right now, i never heard him all lovey dovey before what did u do to him, was the that good for u too??? ;)- 

“Hold on, what the did you and Bobby do this weekend?” Junhoe turned his shocked expression on Hanbin, who grinned and glanced at the phone, writing a hasty reply to Jinhwan before turning his attention back to Junhoe. 

“Uh yeah, we also had this weekend. I was going to tell you, when I stopped teasing you about Jinhwan.” 

Junhoe wasn’t sure what to think. On one hand, it was kind of cool, they both had their first times at the same time. Not that he cared about that, it was a little too sentimental. But it was weird, how their times had lined up. 

“Was it magical?” Junhoe mockingly asked, and one look at Hanbin’s dreamy expression told him everything he needed to know. 

“Totally,” Hanbin replied, leaning against him, “he is amazing in bed, I don’t even know how many times I came.” 

“Ugh, gross, Hanbin!” Junhoe shoved him away. 

“Stop being a baby, let’s talk about this. We’re both no longer s, we should celebrate.” Now he was just doing it intentionally to annoy Junhoe. 

“Yeah let’s celebrate by never talking about it again, cool?” 

“I didn’t think falling asleep with someone could be that nice either,” Hanbin replied, moving right back next to Junhoe and clinging to his arm. 

Junhoe rolled his eyes, even though he agreed fully with Hanbin. “Yeah, I guess that was cool too.” 

“Wait he slept over too?” Hanbin asked, grinning at the way Junhoe’s cheeks flushed red already. “Wow, we really did have the exact same weekend, didn’t we? Did he make you breakfast in the morning?” 

Jinhwan frowned. “No. Why did Bobby make you breakfast?” 

Hanbin smirked. “Sure did! We ate in bed too, it was super romantic.” 

“Ugh, disgusting.” Junhoe frowned. “Jinhwan and I just ed again when we woke up.” 

Hanbin bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. “Yeah, well we did that too after eating, so I still win.” 

Junhoe narrowed his eyes, not wanting to admit defeat. “Did you actually him, though, or did he just you?” 

Hanbin sat back and looked at Junhoe. “He ed me both times.” 

Junhoe grinned in victory. “Jinan ed me once, but I actually ed him. Twice.” Sunday morning had just been Junhoe ing Jinhwan (because Junhoe had said he was a little sore) but Jinhwan had been on top of him, so he’d kind of still commanded the whole thing. Hanbin didn’t have to know that, though. 

“Liar,” Hanbin whispered, shocked at the admission. 

“Ask him.” Junhoe smugly replied. “So I win.” 

Hanbin shook his head. “Ah well it makes sense. Our relationships are different. Yours is just for experience, so really Jinan hyung wouldn’t be doing a good job if he didn’t let you him. Whereas I have the rest of my life to Bobby, so we can take things a little bit slower.” 

Junhoe felt an uncomfortable lurch in his stomach at Hanbin’s quip. Of course Hanbin didn’t mean anything hurtful by it, because he couldn’t possibly know how Junhoe felt about Jinhwan. But it was true, wasn’t it? 

Had it meant more for Hanbin and Bobby? Not that he wanted to think about Hanbin having , but Bobby had probably kissed him during it, hadn’t he? Probably hadn’t stopped kissing him, because they were kind of gross. Hanbin had gotten the full experience, while Junhoe had just gotten half the experience. 

Whatever. It was fine. It didn’t diminish it, it had still been mind blowing and amazing. So what if it hadn’t been as intimate as Hanbin’s experience? So what if Jinhwan hadn’t kissed him once all weekend? He didn’t need that side of it. What they had was casual, and there was nothing wrong with that. 

Still, though. At least one kiss would have been nice. 
 

- beloved hyung, my deepest condolences for having with junhoe. if you need someone to talk to, know that i’m here for you in your time of need!- 

Jinhwan practically spat his drink out when he read Hanbin’s message. “Okay, hold up a second, oh my god, Bobby why is your boyfriend the cutest brat in the entire world?” 

“Huh?” Bobby’s head shot up, looking at Jinhwan’s phone. He laughed as soon as he read the message. “Ah, that’s my boy.” 

Jinhwan typed a response back, not even giving it a second thought that Junhoe had told Hanbin. He’d expected him to. 

“So I guess they must be talking right now too, huh?” Bobby said, and it made him happy to know that. He’d told Jinhwan about his plans as soon as he’d made them, of course, but they hadn’t had time to really sit down and discuss how the weekend had gone until now. Jinhwan had been surprised with a visit from his mother and sister on Sunday night to celebrate his test for the SNU music department. Last night Jiun and Jeeyoung had been over for the entire night, so they hadn’t had a chance to be alone. 

But tonight they had the apartment to themselves, and they were telling each other about their exploits in explicit detail. 

“I still can’t believe you and I are ing best friends,” Jinhwan said with a laugh, “it’s kind of weird when you think about it.” 

“Yeah, so don’t screw it up, okay? Be good to Junhoe.” Bobby . 

“I was good to him! I let him me twice, you know. He said he was too sore for round two on Sunday morning, but I think he was lying to see if I’d let him have another go.” 

Bobby grinned. “How was he, anyway? Satisfying after your long drought?” 

Jinhwan grinned back. “Surprisingly good. I mean the first time was a typical first time, barely lasted, but Sunday morning was a better indicator. Granted I did make him lie back so I could ride him, so I made sure it was really good for me, at least.” 

Bobby shook his head, feeling weird at hearing Jinhwan describe it. It’s not that it was uncomfortable to think about Jinhwan having , because they’d told each other details about their lives before. It was just weird because this was the first time that Bobby knew the person Jinhwan was talking about, had regular interactions with him, even. 

“Gotta look out for yourself, very important when dealing with the s.” Bobby teasingly replied. 

“Mm, I remember a time when that was all you cared about. Bragging about taking care of yourself and making your partners finish themselves off afterwards. You used to be so selfish.” Jinhwan teasingly said, amused eyes on Bobby. 

Bobby frowned but tried not to let it show how much it actually affected him. “Ah, don’t talk about that, okay? I was an .” 

“Were you, though? I’d say your partners were the s, and you were the .” Jinhwan laughed at the joke, especially because Bobby looked almost offended by it. 

“Come on, Jinan, that’s not funny, okay? I actually feel bad about it.” Bobby frowned and punched Jinhwan in the arm. 

Jinhwan wasn’t deterred, though. “Oh stop crying, okay. You were a selfish teenager, no surprise there. We’ve all been ty people before, don’t hold onto it.” 

“I’m not holding onto it,” Bobby replied, “it’s just that, I don’t know, being with Hanbin is making me realize just how much of an I was. So I’m happy that I’m getting the chance to do it over, right? I’m doing everything the way it’s supposed to be done with him. And everything just feels better because of it. Like I’ve had some good before, but it was nothing compared to Hanbin. I love him so much, Jinan, I’m glad we waited so long.” 

Jinhwan knew Bobby was being honest, and he’d probably be touched later that Bobby was saying it all out loud to him. But right now he couldn’t help but for it. 

“Good lord, Jiwon, that might be the most disgusting thing you’ve ever said to me, please stop.” 

“Oh off, Jinan!” Bobby smacked him, sitting up on his bed and moving away. He watched as Jinhwan laughed and took his phone back out, and Bobby could see from here that he was texting Hanbin. 

-fyi bob’s bein grossss about u right now, i never heard him all lovey dovey before what did u do to him, was the that good for u too??? ;)- 

He kicked Jinhwan’s shoulder. “Would you quit it? I’m trying to open up to you, and you keep teasing me!” 

Jinhwan tossed his phone down and got up, lunging at Bobby. “I’m not used to you being all emotional, okay? I don’t know how to deal with you like this.” 

“Can’t you just be happy?” Bobby replied, sounding annoyed but not really. Jinhwan had a point, after all. Bobby had never hidden things from him, but he’d never been so open about his feelings before either. 

“I am happy, honestly,” Jinhwan wrestled him around, ending up mostly on top of Bobby, arms tight around him, “you know how much I like Hanbin. Hell I adore him, I’m not just happy for you but I’m happy for myself too, to have him as a friend. Hanbin’s actually perfect for you, in a way that people rarely find that one person they’re meant to be with. You and Hanbin are definitely meant to be, no question. I mean, you really opened yourself up to him, I’m still proud of you for that.” 

Bobby was happy to hear it all, and he cuddled Jinhwan back as tightly. “Thanks, Jinan.” 

“And your perfect boyfriend has a super hot piece of that I get to now, so it’s a win-win for everyone, right?” No need to mention his confusing, developing feelings. Bobby didn’t need to know. 

Bobby groaned into Jinhwan’s hair. “You ever plan on doing anything more than just ing him?” 

“What else is there to do?” Jinhwan teased back. 

“I don’t know, call me crazy, but I think you like him more than you’re letting on. I’m not going to pull a Hanbin and harass you about it, but I’m just curious about why you’re not actually dating him.” 

“Have you met him?” Jinhwan teased back. “He’s got some maturing to do, emotionally.” It was easier to deflect with teasing than it was to be honest. 

“Don’t we all?” Bobby replied. “Date him and make him mature.” 

“I thought you said you weren’t going to harass me?” Jinhwan replied, snuggling his head into Bobby’s chest. 

“Fine, suit yourself. I’ve said my piece.” 

Jinhwan thought he wanted to say more, so instead he decided to distract Bobby with the one topic that would be sure to take centre stage. “I decided to go home for Christmas this year, I cleared it with mom on Sunday.” 

“Oh yeah?” Bobby perked up at that. On one hand he was sad about not having Jinhwan here for the holiday, but on the other hand, if Jinhwan himself had made the decision, Bobby knew that could only mean one thing. 

“Yeah, I’m going to talk to her about jiu jitsu. I feel like I finally know how to approach her about it and not just have her shut me out.” Of course he was just going to omit the part about California, because Bobby didn’t need to know about that until Jinhwan had the green light. 

“Are you really?” Bobby pulled back a bit, grabbing Jinhwan’s face so he could look him in the eyes. “You’re really going to try again?” 

Jinhwan nodded, and he could feel tears prickling at his eyes already. He cried too easily during conversations, sometimes. “Yeah, I think it’ll help having Seiyeon there too, especially now that she’s seen me fighting. I just need to be an adult about it, and not a bratty kid. I’m confident she’ll actually talk to me about it this time, and not just brush it aside.” 

“Jinan,” Bobby couldn’t keep the smile off his face, “I’m so happy for you that you feel confident enough to try again. Seriously, I feel good about this, I feel like this time your mom is going to be on your side, you know? Just this gut feeling. Everything you say to her is going to go over well, and you’ll have her support.” Bobby pulled him into his chest for a hug, burying his face in Jinhwan’s hair. 

Family was so important to Bobby, and he’d always felt the strain between Jinhwan and his mother. Just the idea of them patching things up was enough to make Bobby emotional, and just as Jinhwan had anticipated, all other thoughts swept out of Bobby’s head at the news. 

Jinhwan clung to Bobby, biting his lip to keep the tears in. He wanted to lie and say they were coming out because of his mom, but at the moment he knew these tears were for Bobby, for the idea of having to leave him to be an entire ocean away. Was he really going to be able to do it? To leave everyone? His mom, his sister, Bobby, his entire adopted family, Hanbin, his other friends at school… Junhoe. Even Eric. 

He was going to be alone, and his heart broke thinking about it. 

Bobby heard the first sob break from Jinhwan’s throat and he just hugged him tighter, misinterpreting the tears for the convenient excuse Jinhwan wanted to use. 

“Hey, it’s okay, Jinan. I know you’ve wanted this for so long, I’m proud of you for trying again. Your mom will see your side this time, you and Seiyeon are going to win her over on the jiu jitsu thing. And then the next time you fight your mom’s gonna be there, and she’s gonna watch you kick some guys’ asses, and she’s gonna be so proud of you, right? She’ll probably cry and be a mess, you know how moms are.” Jinhwan didn’t reply, just kept his head buried in Bobby’s chest, and Bobby kept his arms tightly held around him, kissed his forehead a few times and played with his hair, told him everything was going to be okay, that next year would the best year ever. 

Jinhwan took it, took it all in, even as the guilt ate at him for keeping his biggest secret from Bobby. It just wasn’t worth it, the potential of telling him before his mom said yes. He couldn’t put that on Bobby, not at the end of their last year in high school. They both had enough going on as it was.