Once Upon A Rainy Day
Once Upon A Rainy Day.....Pit pat
Pit pat
Pit pat…
The tiny blissful droplets fell on my window, announcing the arrival of yet another rainy day…and your sweet memories. I snuggled in my pillow and comforter more, trying hard to run away from those memories. But like every time, I failed. I closed my eyes as a knock is heard on my bedroom door. Then I heard it open a creak.
''Baek?'', a soft voice called me. I tried to find your sweetness in this voice but disappointment is my destiny. I heard footsteps coming closer and after few moments, I felt the bed weigh down as someone sat behind me.
''You should get up now', Kai said softly, caressing my back soothingly. I leaned in his touch, trying to find your warmth, which reminded me of how you woke me up in the morning.
''Hey Baekkie wake up now~', you whined, but I leaned in your chest smiling, eyes still close. 'If you won't wake up now, I'll do something which you'll regret', your threat made me open my eyes as you sat up on bed.
'Oh really?', I raised an eye brow. 'I want to see what you are going to do', I demanded, sitting up too. I didn't misunderstand that smirk and glint in your eyes, but I did misunderstand your innocence, as you pounced on me and pushed me back on bed, straddling my waist between your knees and your arms on either side of my chest.
'You don't know what you've gotten yourself into', you whispered huskily in my ear, sending shivers down my spine as well as . Too shocked, I just stared at your eyes, which, even in a cocky mood, held their warmth.
'I think I will enjoy the situation' I said, after recovering from shock. 'As long as I'm with you, I don't mind getting stuck anywhere'. My statement made you smile warmly.
'I love you Chanyeol', I whispered.
'I love you too Baekhyun', you whispered before leaning in for a sweet and innocent kiss which wasn't that innocent after a few seconds when everything got heated and passionate. I couldn't do anything else as the situation slipped right out of my fingers but in your influence, pain was the pure pleasure.
I smiled at the memory of our morning love makings. I heard a sigh and turned around to see the disappointed look on Kai's face.
'Chanyeol would've wanted you to get up and eat something. Have you noticed how skinny you've gotten?', worry was clear in his voice, so I slowly got up on bed because I didn't want anyone to worry about me.
'Soo will make you breakfast, come down', he said, then kissed my forehead and went out of the room. I closed my eyes, and tried to resemble his affection with yours. But unlike anyone's kisses, your kisses were the sweetest thing I've ever encountered. Brushing off your thoughts, for just few minutes, I got off from bed and headed to bathroom. After cleaning, brushing and changing, I went downstairs and smelled something delicious.
Hmmm french toast and cheese omelet, your favorite… I smiled as another blissful memory of our morning crossed my mind.
'Yah~! Jagi, eat now!', your order made me chuckle and you looked at me with wide eyes.
'Make me', I ordered you back.
'Come on, eat now. I even made your favorite breakfast', you said.
'But Yeollie, french toast and cheese omelet is your favorite', I said, and a mesmerizing blush crept upon your cheeks. 'But anyway, your favorite, my favorite', I said, picking up the fork and took one bite. Your oh-so-yummy toast and omlete made me hungrier than before and I started shoving bigger bites in my mouth which made you laugh.
'It wasn't funny', I complained.
'You are cute', you pinched my cheek, which made me blush.
Smiling to myself at the beautiful memory, I made my way to the table and sat down. Seeing my lightened up mood, Kyungsoo smiled at me and placed my breakfast in front of me. I picked up the fork and started eating.
'Baek', Kyungsoo called me lovingly. I looked up at him. 'Luhan said he and Sehun would like to take you to shopping, you mind them?'.
'Why would I mind?', I asked him softly which made him smile. After a while Kai joined us and we ate the rest of the breakfast in silence with them stealing quick and loving glances at each other occasionally, like we used to do. After breakfast,Kai picked up the dishes and as he wass busy with putting the dishes in the dishwasher, Kyungsoo stood up and made his way to where Kai was standing. Wrapping his hands around his waist, he leaned his head on Kai's back. I looked at them for a moment.
'Guys, do you think I'm over Chanyeol?', I asked sadly. Kai turned around in hug and pulled Kyungso closer to his chest.
'From my view, I see that you haven't moved over him. He is still in your heart. And you haven't done anything wrong yet but it really wouldn't matter, because knowing Chanyeol since childhood, even he would've wanted you to share your pain with someone and being his best friend, I took this responsibility and promised him to take care of you'. His soft spoken words made my eyes tear up. Why did you leave someone for me, when I don't even know if you are fine there or not? I complained inwardly, hoping you will surely hear my heart.
'I promise you Chanyeol, I will take care of your Baekhyun more than my own self', Kai repeated his same words which he had said that day.
That dreadful day…
When everything was open to me…
And reality had hit me, knowing I'll be loosing you…
Sooner or later, but for sure…
I ran.
I ran without hesitation, Sehun trailing behind me, calling me.
But my mind was too fogged, and eyes blurred by tears.
Rain drenched me to my skin.
But I didnt stop.
I had to reach you.
Endless sobs escaped my mouth as my breathless chest heaved, but my legs never stopped.
My actions came to halt when I reached the place I never thought to meet you.
Central Hospital…
I rushed in the hospital, and made way to the front desk, demanding your room number from lady sitting behind it.
Room number 306… I will never forget that number…
I rushed to the destined room.
I opened the door with much more force than intended, which startled you.
But your face soon turned warm.
'Look, the honey pot is here', your weak voice spoke softly. I took wobbly steps towards the bed, on which you were lying. Reaching the foot, I lost my balance and fell to ground, Kai and Kyungsoo quickly came to my help. On your order, Kai picked me up and placed on your lap. Being wet and cold, I snuggled in your warmth and cried endlessly, as your soothing words seeped in my senses. When I got control on my sobs, you hugged me even closer.
'Kai, will you take care of him?', you asked him. I looked up. He took your hand in his.
'I promise you Chanyeol, I will take care of your Baekhyun more than my own self', he spoke softly.
'Why are you leaving me?', I asked in shaky and broken voice, looking at the wires and tubes connected on your arm.
'Baekkie, I love you too much. But my time is here', you spoke too softly which made the stream ofmy tears to fall even harder. You took my face in your hands and made me look at you.
And I saw it…
Saw what you meant…
Saw the tiredness in your eyes, the weakness in your movements, saw the lost shine of your skin…
But warmth was there…
Home was there, in your arms, but not for long…
'I have brain tumor. And I am in my worst condition now. But I won't be gone away from here completely. I live in your heart Baekkie. I may not be with you physically, but as long as you give me home in your heart, I am staying with you forever. You have my heart, and in the end we will be together. If not here, then definitely there', then you kissed me for the last time…
I tied your soft words to the string of my life, never letting go…
Then I heard it…
Heard your heart rate going down…
Saw your eyes drooping close, but never loosing their affection…
Then your body limped…
Kai quickly pulled me away from you…
I saw it…
Saw with my own eyes…
The love of my life, the reason of my existence slipping away from my fingers…
I just stood and watched as your final breathes said goodbye to me…
But that angelic smile told me everything…
Told me where you are…
Up there, you are happy, but definitely waiting for me and our love to be reunited.
Kai pulled me closer to himself as he and Kyungsoo gave me a warm hug. They knew where my memories were taking me as they could feel my silent tears falling. I looked up at them and smiled brokenly through tears, knowing it will make both of them, and me as well, feel better, as it was your way to make situation better.
I sat down in front of your bed, where you were sleeping, but sadly six feet under the ground. But that didn't matter because I could feel your presence around myself. I ran my fingers on the name engraved on the tomb stone.
Park Chanyeol…
I smiled and put the bouquet of red and white roses on your bed.
A single drop of rain fell on my cheek. I looked up at the clouds, so warm, so clear, so affectionate, just like your eyes.
Your lovely eyes…
Soon, it started drizzling. I let those sheer blissful drops to caress my skin, drenching in them, assuming them as your unshed tears which I knew you had in store for our love.
I promise you to live my life here fully before coming to you and sharing the love with you in store for you…
Park Chanyeol I Love You…
Always…
Forever yours, Byun Baekhyun
Comments