I watched in silence as this familiar girl who danced inside the empty studio. Her body moved along the rhythm of the music with ease and there was a slight smile on her lips. She wore a gray oversized blouse with black legging and black converse. I found it hard to divert my attention from this girl.

She was Jung Soojung. A senior named Junmyeon introduced her to me earlier and I foolishly shook her hand with a stupid look on my face. As embarrassing it was, I just could not help it, this girl was so mesmerizing. She was gorgeous, hardworking, good in dancing and singing, kind and quite popular among the trainees here. Everyone knew Soojung here, the little sister of Jessica Jung whom newly debuted together with her group Girls’ Generation.

“Oh, Jongin, is that you?”

Her sweet voice woke me up from my daydream and I could feel my cheeks getting hotter as she approached me. She patted her sweaty neck with the towel that hung around her neck and opened the door.

“Do you want to practice? I’m sorry, I’ll go after this. God, I don’t even realize the time right now.”

She entered back to the room without even waiting for my answer and packed her belonging to her sling bag. Actually I was just going back to take my book that I accidentally left on the studio for my singing practice. Then I heard a familiar music and came here to find her practiced alone on her own. But I supposed to leave quietly without getting caught staring at her like this.

“Here’s the key, Jongin. I’m sorry, you should’ve stopped me earlier, you know?” Her fingers brushed mine as she gave me the key and she patted my shoulder. “I’ll leave first, Jongin. Don’t tire yourself too much.”

I watched in awe as her figures walked past me and that was when reality struck.

“I should’ve offered to take her home.” I grumbled and ruffled my hair in frustration.

***

“Soojung, do you want to go to the canteen together?”

Jonghyun’s voice made me halted my track and turned to her direction. She just came out from the dance practice room and I could hear Girls’ Generation song blasted from inside.

“Oh, is Jessica here today?” Junmyeon asked excitedly. “Is their practice going to end soon? If that so, then let’s all grab some lunch together.”

An apologetic look planted on her face and she shook her head. “Their practice just started a while ago.”

Jonghyun sighed, obviously disappointed. “That’s too bad. What about you then, are you free right now?”

She nodded in hesitant manner. “Well, I’m free, but…” She looked over Jonghyun’s back where Taemin and I stood in silence. Taemin’s lips then curled upward and he gave me a look. I nudged him on the rib as a warning to keep him quiet.

“Oh, Soojung, why don’t you join us? I’m sure someone’s going to be really happy if you do.” He urged her and grinned as if he did not just about to spill my secret in front of my crush. “Someone’s going to feel really, really happy, I swear.”

I groaned inwardly at Taemin and his infamous big mouth. I should not tell him about my deepest secret because basically, Taemin had the tendency to slip out every important secret here and there.

“Someone? Happy?” She looked confused. “Who?”

God, please had mercy on me. She was so cute when she did that.

“Well, actually it isn’t someone but everyone.” Taemin gave me a quick glance as if he was saying ‘don’t be such a , dude’ and winked. “Because everyone like you, especially Jong‒” I stepped on his foot and he jumped slightly on his spot. “‒uh, Jonghyun.”

Jonghyun looked puzzled. “Me? Why me?”

I was well aware that if thing kept on going Taemin would surely leak my secret now. I walked closer to him, hand grabbed his shoulder so hard that he whimpered and glared at me but I did not give a care. I mustered an innocent smile despite how furious I was with him.

“Can we go now? I’m really hungry right now.” I lied and now everyone had their gaze on me. I continued to muster a smile. It was not a pure lie, okay? Half of it was true, anyway.

“Right, I want to eat curry today.” Junmyeon exclaimed loudly, his face was in pure bliss as he boosted about his love for curry. “I’ve been craving for some curry since last month.”

“But you ate that yesterday, though?” Jonghyun raised a brow skeptically at him.

He shrugged it off coolly. “Once isn’t enough. The curry here is so delicious, that’s all. Now what do you want to eat, Soojung?”

All of our eyes locked on the girl across us and she fidgeted on her place. Her brows knitted together, a sign of her really thought about what to eat today and I found that really adorable. She was adorable.

“Maybe tteokbokki?” She tilted her head and if I thought she could not be any cuter, she putted her pointy finger to her chin while doing that but I was sure she did not realize that. “I’m on a mood for some spicy food.”

“Weird, I also want to eat tteokbokki now since you said so.” Jonghyun grinned at her and I bulged out my eyes at how casually he linked his arm to hers. “To the canteen, go, go, go.”

She laughed at his affection as he dragged her softly along with Junmyeon who walked behind them. I then heard a snicker came from my side and rolled my eyes, knowing well who it was.

“You should just play along with me earlier, buddy. Now Jonghyun is going to steal your girl and your pathetic little self can’t even do anything about that.”

He left me with a mocking smirk and only God knew how much I wanted to strangle the hell out of Lee Taemin right now.

***

“Jongin?”

I looked up at the voice that I knew very well belong to whom. It was so melodious and soft and it was my most favorite. But right now was not the right time to droll over her presence near me because of the shocking news I just received some hours ago.

“Hey,” I greeted her weakly then looked down again as if my shoes were the most interesting thing. “What are you doing here, Soojung?”

I was currently sitting on a staircase in the quietest area of SM Entertainment building, hiding myself from the world and had no intention of going back home even if the clock showed it was 1 a.m. right now. I felt her getting closer to me and sat on the empty spot beside me, warm radiated from her body.

“Are you okay, Jongin?” She eyed me carefully and I could practically imagine the look on her face as my devastated self. “I’m fine.”

I heard she sighed before scooted closer and placed her arm around my shoulders while her other hand grabbed my hand in a comforting manner. “Your best friend is going to debut soon. I expected you to be more happy than this. What’s wrong, Jongin?”

I felt weird for a moment. She did not say anything wrong, she was damn right. I knew I should be happy for Taemin. It was his dream to finally debuting and I, as his best friend, should congratulate him with all my might.

“Are you feeling sad?” She pushed on the topic, her voice calm but I sure she was trying her hard not to say any wrong word to me. “You seemed upset about the news, Jongin.”

There was only a sound of our breath as a dead silence felt upon the two of us. Her hands still stayed on me as I tried my hard not to make a stupid move.

“I just… I don’t know,” My voice low, barely above the whisper, and it was shaking. I felt her squeezed my hand that she held, a silent sign for me to continue. “I knew I should be happy for him, but the other part of me just could not help it and without I realized, I was here, isolating myself from anyone.”

“There was something bugging me, like, why is it only Taemin, what’s wrong with me. I was feeling upset at myself that I didn’t make it to the group. I’m the worst, right?”

I was expecting her to shout at my stupidity, at how selfish was I and that I disappointed her because how narrow minded was I. But Soojung had always managed to surprise me with her every action.

She circled her hands around my neck and our bodies pressed together. She rested her chin on my shoulder and I could hear her steady breath on my ear. For a moment, she just stayed like that without saying anything and neither did I. I was, in all honesty, dumfounded at the fact that Jung Soojung just hugged me so casually like this. I only hoped that my heartbeat was not that obvious to her because I did not need any embarrassing moment with her.

“There’s nothing wrong with your thoughts, okay?” She rubbed my back with her hands, creating a weird feeling inside my stomach as she telling, “It just showed how much passion you had to debut and I personally think it’s admirable, Jongin.”

“But I‒”

“Hey, I’m not finished yet.” She interjected me, there was a playful tone on her voice that I did not miss. “Let’s just say that Taemin has something that his group need so he debuted first before you. Taemin is your friend, so you should know better than anyone at how amazing he is. I know the President has also puts you up in the right group, you just don’t know it yet.”

“You think so?”

“Mm. Don’t you think so?”

“Maybe?”

My unsure answer made her laughed as she pulled back from the hug. I felt a sudden emptiness but I could not really do anything about it. After all, she was being nice enough to give me a hug and I could not let my greediness took control of me.

There was a wide grin on her lips when she stared at me. “Felling better?”

God was not being fair, how could I say no when she looked like an angel sent from heaven?

I nodded slowly, the corner of my lips turned upward. “Thanks, Soojung.”

She gave me a sweet smile. “Anytime, Jongin.”

***

I watched Taemin’s first stage proudly. He was doing great and looked so cool on stage. The others also did their best, Minho with his good rap to Jonghyun’s high note. I could not help but felt slightly envy of them, especially when Soojung’s eyes twinkled as SHINee performed.

“Taemin is so cool, right, Jongin?” She gushed about him to me while her eyes glued on the television screen in front of us. “I can’t wait until you finally debuting.”

Was it my ears playing trick on me? Why would she say something like that?

“Uh, Soojung, what did you just sa