I stood at the railing on the veranda outside your house. "Our house, " I mentally hear you correcting me. You've said that to me so many times, despite the fact that I still have my own apartment & I only stay here part-time. But you've always said you want me to feel at home here, "Just don't touch my art," you said the first time I spent the night. I chuckled softly at the memory, but the laughter died all too soon in my throat. There was a reason why I was here tonight. We both know it, but we've been avoiding the topic all evening. 

     I hear your footsteps & the clinking of our wine glasses as you set them on the table behind me. I know the conversation that is coming, but I am not ready for it. I gaze up at the moonlit sky, wishing that things were different. That this wasn't it. That we had more time. 

"Daesung..." you mutter softly, not quite knowing how to to broach the subject. 

"Please... Let's not talk about that now," I say. I've always willingly listened to anything you wanted to say before, but this time I can't bear to hear it. I can't stand to hear you speak those words or even think of saying goodbye. Not now. Not ever. I smile a tight little smile in your direction & try to hide the tears stinging my eyes. "This is ridiculous. I refuse to cry," I think to myself. 

     You wrap your arms around me & I lean my head back against your shoulder. I thought I would be the one comforting you on this night just as I have so many times in the months since you decided to enlist. So many times I've told you that you'll never be alone. That you never could be. "We are one now," I said. And I really meant it. So how can it be that on our last night together you're the one comforting me? 

     All the emotions I've been holding back over the past months rush in & tears spill over my cheeks. The length of time we will be apart looms over me & I suddenly feel very alone. Even though I am still in your arms. You've always been there. Always. Even on my darkest days. A shudder runs through my body as the painful memories arise. Your arms around me tighten & you enfold my shaking hands in your strong ones, your fingers caressing my own & making me lose my train of thought for a moment.

     In an almost surprising show of gentleness, you turn me around to face you. I hastily wipe my tears away even though I know you've already seen them. I need to be strong for you. It just seems that I've forgotten how. You lower your head a bit to look me in the eye & begin to sing in a goofy imitation of me

"Baby don't cry, baby don't cry, baby don't cry

Eonjenga deo abitnalgeoya, give me your smile."

A somewhat hesitant grin spreads across my face at the silly performance of my song & the twinkle in your eyes. Your efforts to make me smile genuinely touch my heart.

     "Hyung..." I say, as I look back into those eyes that are gazing upon me with such overwhelming fondness. I search for something to say, something to express how I'm feeling in this moment, but words fail me. I place my hand over my heart as if by gesturing I could show you how I feel & my fingers tangle in the silver chain about my neck. I glance down at the silver feather that I had almost forgotten was there. It seems to have almost become a part of me since the day you placed it around my neck. And there is no possession that I value more. I draw comfort just by feeling it against my skin, as if your gift were actually a part of you that I carry with me. I run my fingers over the warm, smooth metal. "Hyung..." I tried again, looking back up at your expectant gaze & the words just come tumbling out, "Hyung, you always make me smile. No matter what. They call me 'smiling angel,' but you are my angel." I know it sounds silly; cheesy, even. But I hope you'll understand. You smile at me softly. That tender smile that I love so much. And I can see tears gathering in the corners of your eyes. 

     Seconds pass, but no more words are spoken. We just stand there gazing at each other; memorizing each other's faces. You break the eye contact first & begin fumbling with your phone. I hold back a sigh of disappointment as my eyes drop to the ground. This is not the time for Instagram. Then I hear soft music begin to play & Jiyong's voice begin to sing a song of sadness, longing, & promise. My eyes shoot up to meet yours again. I know this song. You turn to place your phone on the table beside our forgotten wine glasses. You smile softly as your eyes meet mine once again. As the music swirls around us, you extent your hand in silent invitation & I join you for this; one last dance.

     For now, anyway. 

Italicized lyrics are from Daesung's song Baby Don't Cry 

Author's note: Well, I thought this story would be a one-shot, but the characters decided to visit again & who am I to tell them "No?" I'm merely the one who writes the story down. This chapter is set on the night before T.O.P's enlistment & is told from Daesung's point of view. I know it's fluffy, mushy, & a bit cheesy, but truthfully, our beloved angel is cheesy too. Quite adorably so.  I do hope that I reflected that side of his character well & that you enjoyed this little Drabble/short story. Until next time? Much love to you, my readers, no matter how few. And thank you. <3