the boy i love the most pt 1
taeten moments iithis will be a pretty long ride i'm not sure how long it'll be or how many parts it'll have but here's part one for the first fic of #RiseTaeTen2k17
2934 words
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Taeyong groaned into his pillow when he hears the doorbell. It’s his only day off and he doesn’t want anyone to bother him. He was planning to sleep all day then, maybe, eat cereals and watch TV when he wakes up.
He stood angrily and stomped his way to the front door. His eyes were barely open and he doesn’t even have a shirt on. When he opens the door, he sees Mr. Oh--the butler who took care of him when he was a child--and, suddenly, he was wide awake.
“Good morning, young master,” the old man greets him.
“Hi,” he says. “What are you doing here?” he asks, fidgeting behind the door.
“I came here to give these to you,” he replies as he handed Taeyong a bag. He looked at the contents and frowns.
“Letters?”
Mr. Oh nodded. “Addressed to you. I didn’t look at them, I assure you. I thought you might wanted to have them.” His tone held a hint of amusement.
Taeyong hummed. “Thank you, I guess.”
“I’ll be going then, young master.” The old man bowed at him then left.
Taeyong closed the door while scanning the letters then went to his living room where his mail for the past week is sitting on his coffee table. He held a letter from the bag in his left hand and another letter from his table in his right. He looked at the handwriting and noticed that they were identical. He opened the one that looked the oldest and read it silently.
Dear Taeyong,
I wrote this letter to tell you that I love you. Yes, I love you, hyung. When did I realize that I love you? I guess it was when we were still kids. You introduced yourself while I was seating alone on the bench in the playground of our daycare, you protected me when everyone thought I was different, you took care of me when I was sick even though my mom insists that you should go home because you might catch my cold, you taught me how to use chopsticks and taught me Korean words that I couldn’t understand, you played with me when no one else wanted to, you stayed with me when storms come because you know that I’m scared of thunder, lightning and the dark, you treated me like family and you became my friend--my best friend.
It’s super crazy. I didn’t think I would fall so hard for you. I thought it was just a brotherly kind of love. Like the way I love my sister and my family. But, it was so, so different. It wasn’t like a ‘love at first sight’ kind of thing. It was more like a ‘the sun shined brightly down on you and everything was just white noise. You were all I could see.’
My heart hurts when you smile at girls. You should only look at me like that. You should only smile at me like that. That’s why I “accidentally” pushed Jian too hard on the swing when we were in 2nd grade. I swear I didn’t mean to! There was a voice in the back of my head saying that I should because she’s taking you away from me. And I can’t bear that. You’re my best friend. I had you first. She just came into your life when I have been there for so long. You believed me as I cried and said that I didn’t mean to. You hugged me and told me that everything is going to be okay.
You make me smile when I cry. Whenever other kids would tease me about my accent and my chubby cheeks, you would squeeze my cheeks between your hands and tell me that you love my baby fat. You would kiss my forehead and tell me that I shouldn’t listen to what they say because my cheeks are what make me so cute.
You listen to my hopes and my dreams. When I told you that I wanted to be an architect, you said that you would support me and cheer me on. You were the one who told my parents that I wanted to dance so, they enrolled me to the dance academy that you attended. You would stay up all night with me as we lied on our backs and watched the twinkling stars while we talk about your dream of becoming a chef. You held my hand and said, “Let’s fulfill our dreams together.”
You bought me a new set of colored pencils when my sister broke them. I couldn’t yell or scream at her for breaking them so, I went to you and cried because that was my favorite brand and I couldn’t ask my parents to buy them for me when they just bought those. The next day, when I came out of the shower, I saw the new set of colored pencils with a note attached to the box. ‘I know how important these are to you. Stop crying, now, okay?’ the neat handwriting, that I recognized as yours, on the note said. Those were expensive but, you still bought them for me.
You watched me closely when I sprained my ankle from dancing. It wasn’t even that bad. I trained to be a gymnast for years. I could take a lot more than that but, you still watched over me and helped me to get to class. You even carried me home even though I could walk by myself. I protested and hit your back as I struggled to get off. You smiled over your shoulder and said, “Stop being stubborn. I would carry you on my back even when we get old.” I stopped fussing and blushed. I hid my flushed face where your neck and shoulder meet while you laughed at my blushing state.
I was the first person that tasted your food. You looked at me expectantly to see my reaction. And I wasn’t lying when I told you that you’re the best cook in the world. There was a tint of pink in your cheeks when I told you that.
You smiled at me as we knelt outside our classroom with both our folded hands up high because we were late for our first subject. It was my fault that we arrived ten minutes late. I took too long in the shower and we had to run really fast when we arrived at our school. We were still late so our teacher punished us. Mr. Im called our parents and told them what happened. It was my fault but, you said that you overslept and swore that you won’t ever do it again. It was my fault but, you took the blame and winked at me when our parents looked at you weirdly because it wasn’t like you to oversleep. It was my fault yet you still looked at me like I was the best person in the universe.
My feelings for you overwhelm me sometimes. I can’t keep them inside me any longer. I had to write them down before my heart explodes. My mind is occupied by thoughts of you when I should be studying because we have a quiz on Science tomorrow. For now, I’ll write my feelings down. So, I will remember the things that made me fall for you when we grow old. So, I will never forget the boy that I love the most.
Love,
Ten.
PS. I hope you will never find this. TT
He traces the name. Ten.
Ten is the most beautiful and delicate person he has ever met. Ten is his best friend, his confidant. They could talk for hours and never get tired. They met when Ten moved to Seoul from Thailand. They were in the same daycare when they met. Despite being younger, Ten became Taeyong’s friend. His bubbly friend would laugh and giggle at the simplest things. Like every child, he loves sweets. There were times when he and Ten would eat chocolates on his bed and their maid would get so mad because they got chocolate on the covers. The young Ten would cry because he misses his home and his friends. Taeyong would comfort him and say that he is Ten’s home, now. That would easily calm the boy down. When Taeyong would cry because his father hit him and told him that he was useless, Ten was by side with a blink of an eye. They played hide and seek, tag, basketball and all sorts of games even though they were the only players. They went to the same school, wore the same clothes, borrowed each other’s toys, slept in each other’s beds, held each other’s hands, ate together, and even bathed together. They were inseparable. It’d be weird if Taeyong wasn’t with Ten and vice versa. And as they grew up, Taeyong started to like him more than he should.
He remembers that day. When they had a quiz on Science and Ten did great even though he claims that he forgot to study. He remembers particularly what happened when they got home; Ten’s home.
“Hyung, stop,” Ten says, giggling.
He was on his back, lying on his bed, as Taeyong tickled his sides. They just got back from school and they still had their uniforms on. Ten wouldn’t stop teasing him about Joohyun, their classmate. So, he tickled him, knowing that it’s his weakness.
Ten’s hair fanned out on the white sheets below him. His lips are formed into a grin, his twinkling eyes are shaped like crescents, one hand is clutching his stomach while the other is on his side and his tie is undone; just lying on his open dress shirt. He looks beautiful under Taeyong. He shifts his head then looks at the older male above him. Ten bit his lip and Taeyong is left breathless.
“You still like me more than her, right?” the younger male asks innocently and Taeyong nods. Because yes, he likes Ten more than her. He will always like Ten more than anyone else.
His dog, Ruby, barks at him and bring him back to the present. She jumps to the couch beside him and his hand.
“Good morning to you to, my angel,” he praises. The dog settles on his lap as he took another letter from the pile.
Dear Taeyong,
Do you remember that girl that keeps telling everyone that you’re her boyfriend? I saw her today, standing by her locker, and I approached her. I asked her why she was doing that even though you two weren’t dating and she said it was none of my business. The nerve! I’m your best friend. Of course, it’s my business. How dare she?!?!?!
So, I asked her again, politely, then she pushed me and she shouted at me, saying that it was none of my ing business. She cursed at me, hyung! I didn’t even know that she had until I asked you what that word was. She’s delusional!
I don’t know why she’s doing this. You told me to ignore her because she wasn’t worth it, but she’s getting on my nerves. And I can’t just stand and watch as she claims that you’re hers. You’re mine, hyung!!!! You’re not hers but, mine. I seriously hate her. I hope karma gets to her before I do.
- Ten
Taeyong chuckled while reading the angry handwriting. He definitely remembers her. She was freaking crazy. She was one of Taeyong’s ,any fangirls in high school. She had confessed to him but, he rejected her because he finally admitted to himself that he’s irrevocably in love with Ten. He was gentle when he told her that he can’t reciprocate her feelings. She said it was alright but, a few days later, she started spreading the rumor that they were dating secretly. The news had reached the teachers who called his parents and the girl’s parents regarding their relationship. They were still freshmen in high school and the teachers were concerned. The girl confessed that it wasn’t true and apologized to Taeyong. Soon, the news died and he was relieved.
His stomach growls loudly and startles Ruby that’s lying on his lap. He chuckles when she jumped in surprise. He carries the puppy with him as he walked towards the kitchen to cook something.
Unlike what he told Ten when they were younger, he didn’t become a chef. Instead, he works as the CEO in his father’s company while his older sister works as the CFO. He’s glad to have his sister there to help him and guide him.
As he waits for the stew to boil and the rice to cook, he opened another letter
Dear Taeyong,
You came to my house and you were crying. I didn’t know how to calm you down or what else to do. I held your hands as you sobbed loudly. You were mumbling something. I couldn’t understand what you were saying. It felt like my heart was being crushed into tiny pieces when I saw you crying. I just hugged you and whispered “I’m here” in your ear repeatedly. It was always you who consoled me when I cried and when you came to me with tears streaming down your cheeks, I didn’t know what to do.
When you have calmed down, you told me that your father still blames you for your mother’s death. I didn’t know that your real mother died and the pretty woman who takes care of you is your step mother. I felt bad because I never asked you but, whenever I ask you about your family or your mom, you always changed the subject. I know that you didn’t like talking about them so, I never probed. I still feel bad, though, because I didn’t know the basic stuff about you. I’m sorry, hyung.
When I asked you about your real mom, you finally told me everything that you remembered about her. You said that she died in a car crash when you were three--two years before I met you. You described her as a gentle, loving and ethereal woman. You said that you could tell why your dad fell in love with her. She took care of you and your sister, baked cookies for you, read stories until you fell asleep and filled your childhood with beautiful memories. Your family was perfect when she was still alive. Your mom seemed like a great person. I wish I could have met her. Your eyes sparkled as you told tales about her. I could tell that you loved her so much.
But, she was taken from you in such a young age. You were strapped in your baby seat and happily singing in the back of her car as she drove to your sister’s school to pick her up. She looked at you through the mirror and smiled fondly. Then it happened. Her car collided with another car. You didn’t get any injury but, your mom was hit badly. You could still see her face covered with blood smiling at you and telling you that everything is going to be fine. Help came and the medics immediately got you out. You screamed and sobbed for your mom, struggling in your dad’s arms who came as soon as he could. It took quite a long time to get her out of the car because her legs were trapped. When they did get her out, they rolled her into the ambulance. She looked pale and her beautiful face was covered in her dying blood but, she still smiled at you and mouthed Mom loves you, Taeyong-ah.
You sobbed again as you told the tragic story. You clutched my shirt in your hands and cried. I hugged you and pulled you closer. I don’t like seeing you so sad and vulnerable, hyung.
You said that you could still remember your dad’s ashen face when the doctor said that it was too late. Your mom was gone. You couldn’t understand what the adults were saying but, you started crying when your dad started crying, too. Your sister hugged you tightly in her arms.
Your dad wasn’t a bad dad, you said. He was a good father when he wasn’t drunk. When he drinks too much, he starts cursing and blaming you for your mother’s death. You don’t know the reason why but, you accepted long ago that he will always blame you.
A year after your mom died, your step mom entered your family. She was nice and treated you like her own son. Sometimes, she would do the things that your mom used to do. She’s really kind and gentle and caring. She would smile at you when you stare too long. She would cook something for you when you get hungry in the middle of the night. She started to become a part of your life and it scared you. You didn’t want to get too attached because you didn’t want to lose her, too.
When you met me, it scared you even more. You didn’t want to get too close but, you were already attached since the first day when you introduced yourself to me. And you pray every night that you’ll still see me in the morning and that you’ll still have me for a long time.
It hurt me seeing you like that. I never want to see you like that again, hyung. I promise you I won’t leave you and I will make sure that you’re always happy.
Love,
Ten.
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