Chaerin stared at the name on her phone. ‘Kwon Jiyong’. After countless times of changing it, weird how it ended up being his full name. How formal.

If it had been any other friend, it wouldn’t take her even a second to dial and call to ask if they were okay but it wasn’t just any other friend. It was Jiyong. Her first love, her first kiss, first real relationship, her first everything. But also her first ex lover.

She smiled bitterly. How did they come to this?

A lot ran through her mind. What would she say? What was the right thing to say? How was he? Was he doing fine? ‘Stupid Chaerin’ of course he’s not. His private life was just exposed for the world to see. Who would be fine with that?

She sighed and looked at the time. It would already be midnight in Korea. He would probably be sleeping right? Or he would have turned off his phone right? So this is probably the safest time to call because he probably wouldn’t answer anyway…

She shook her head. Why the hell is this so hard? It had only been a day since his incident. He probably doesn’t want to talk to anybody right now plus he probably already received support from all our friends and family in the company. He doesn’t really need me anymore, right?

She has been thinking of reasons not to call him but still can’t help but wanting to. She knows she wouldn’t be able to do anything if she doesn’t get this over with. So with one last exhale, she pressed that green colored telephone and waited for a second to put the phone on her ear.

Her heart was picking up its pace, first ring.

She closed her eyes not really sure what she wants to happen, second ring.

Does she want him to answer or not? She wasn’t sure. Third ring.

She was about to breathe in relief knowing it would go to voicemail when…

“Hello?” that raspy, bed voice she would never forget answered.

She sat there, wide eyed, staring at nothing in particular and just listening to his even breathing on the line.

“Chae?” he said again and that brought her back.

“Hi.” She managed to croak.

“Is something wrong? Why are you calling?” he asked and she heard him moving and what sounded like blankets shuffling. He probably sat up on his bed.

“Did I wake you? I’m sorry.” Chaerin felt bad. She knew the little amount of rest he had and now she’s disturbing him.

“No. You didn’t. I couldn’t sleep well anyway.”

“Bad dreams?”

“I wish they were only dreams.” He said, sounding too genuine.

Chaerin smiled sadly. She knew he had a hard time coping up with things like these. Especially with issues involving his fans. He loves them. Very much. Even though they were sometimes the reason for his heartbreaks, he loves them. She knows that very well.

“Why are you calling? Did something happen?” he asked again.

That somehow managed to break her heart a little. They came to a point where he already had to ask that. Why? She thought back to it. The last call she made to him was probably a month or even months ago. It wasn’t even a personal call. It had to do with the business and it probably only lasted a minute.

“Nothing. I just… I just wanted to know if you’re okay.”

She heard his loud exhale. “You heard about it huh?”

“Yeah… Harin told me.”

“How is Harin anyway? It’s been long since I last saw her.”

She smiled. “She’s fine. She’s doing great, actually. I think she’s really liking being an editor.”

Harin and Jiyong became very close when she and Jiyong were dating. They were still close now, but not like before, maybe to show respect to her but she never wanted their friendship to be over. She knows Harin wants to have an older brother because it was just them two sisters growing up.

“That’s great. As long as she loves what she’s doing, everything will be fine.” Jiyong genuinely said.

“How about you, how you holding up?”

Jiyong didn’t answer as quick. There was only even breathing on the other line and Chaerin waited patiently for him.

“I… I… I’m coping.” He answered shortly but even with only that, Chaerin knew he wasn’t fine. He was far from fine. She heard him say that before during his scandal. He said he was coping and she went to his apartment only to find him passed out drunk on his couch with bottles of alcohol and p