The few minutes that Kyuhyun spend on the ambulance beside his lover were like hours. And the few hours that he spend waiting for Jongwoon to get out from the surgery room felt like years he waited and waited for some news that may put his heart in ease. The brown haired guy was setting on the long empty hospital hallway. His tainted hand was running on his already messy hair. Tears stopped falling from his swollen red eyes, there was some tiny blood drops on the corner of lips as he kept biting them.

 After one hour of looking at the Surgery room door, waiting for the green light to turn on, Kyuhyun moved his sight to the chair next to him just to notice the blue bag that the nurse placed beside him on the branch few minutes after the smaller entered the surgery room.

With lazy moves he moved his hands and opened the bag and that when he started sobbing again.

It was his birthday gift that Jongwoon was excited to give him just hours ago…

 Despite all the pain that he was feeling and all the regrets that were eating him a microscopic smile managed to cross his face when looked at his dongsaeng gift. It was a black cap with a slogan "I love Starcaft" on it, there was also a T-shirt that contains all his three favorite colors blue, black and red with a drawing on the middle that  Jongwoon painted personally, it was about him playing Starcaft wearing the same T-shirt and the cap.

 Kyuhyun puts the T-shirt close to him, smelling Jongwoon scent that was still on it. He squeezed the T-shirt to his chest as he was hugging Jongwoon. "I love you more, I love you more than anything. Thank you" said Kyuhyun loudly, hoping that his lover that was lying behind the closed doors in front of him would somehow hear him.

"So finally you admit it. It took you so much time Kyuhyun.” Said Siwon who set beside his friend .

"Seems that you liked the gift but that foolish guy was worried that it will not fit your taste”.

“He is a fool to care about such things, anything from him would make me happy" replied Kyuhyun still hugging the T-shirt more.

"He loves you... So much, and when we are in love we get stressed about this small  things".

"How did you... " said the shocked Kyuhyun finally putting the T-Shirt on his lap and looking straight on his friend’s eyes.

."He told me, just before i was going to confess my feelings to him. He told me everything. What were you thinking when you suggested to me ti voice my feelings to him when you two are clearly in love? "

"I rejected him… many times" declared Kyuhyun as he bitted his lower lip putting the shirt and the cap back to the bag.

 "You don't love him? But he said... "

"I do, i'm crazy in love with him, but i'm… I was scared. Back then I thought that I won't survive if people treat me differently or if my dad does not accept me anymore when he knows that I love Jongwoon. But I was wrong I think I could survive with all of that if he is beside me. Back then I didn't release that but actually he is my world. I... I just want him back. I will do well this time so please tell him to comeback Siwon, I'm sorry of all what I did so please make him comeback... " Sobbed  Kyuhyun brokenly as he lifted his legs on the brunch hugging his knees.

He was finally and unconsciously voicing all his regrets and fears to his childhood friend just like he used to do when they were kids.

Siwon was so shocked, he is Kyuhyun's friend since they were on the diapers but he has never seen Kyuhyun so broken like that. He approached his friend and hugged him from the side putting his head on his right shoulder.

"Hey, it's ok. That fool really loves to live; he still wants to drink a lot of coffee so he will not give up easily. He will wake up soon so calm down" said Siwon as he run his fingers on his friend’s hair.

"But what if he will not forgive me? What if he will stay away from me? I can't live without him now Siwon... But I will not blame him if he does so. I hurt him continuously.  I’m the reason why he is here, if only I answered the phone call he would be safe now. I hurt him Siwon... I don't think I deserve him anymore"

"It's an accident! you shouldn't blame yourself for everything. Jongwoon loves you so he will forgive I'm sure of it. You just need to apologize to him. Don't let this thoughts cloud your mind, all what you two need is just a makeup talk.. Everything has a reason and this happened for a reason, Everything will be alright, trust me  "

Siwon knows that Kyuhyun was in fault too, he really wanted to punch him for ignoring Jongwoon for so long, but when he saw his friend statue he hold it all back. Kyuhyun at that moment needed a safe shoulder to lean on and someone to tell him that everything will be alright, and that what he was trying to do.

 "But... Don't you…"

 "I do, I love him too... So much but the thing is, he doesn't. I'm only a friend to him. He is yours from the start so from now on treasure him or else I will... "

"No need for that... I love him more than anything, and like you said everything will be alright” assured Kyuhyun warping his arms around his the taller waist.

"Yeah. Just believed in that. But… hey! why are you squeezing me. Set me free! "

"No, I just released thank I miss my best friend so much. Thank you Siwon"

"You are the most welcome Kyunnie" replied Siwon with smile as he tied his hug to Kyuhyun.

The both broke the hug when the surgery room door was opened and the doctor came out. They only could breathe when the doctor assured that their dongsaeng is out of danger zone. He explained that the smaller got stapled 3 times on his stomach and loses so much blood; his temperature also was so low. And even though that his state was stable he will not be able to wake up immediately. It may take him some days. The doctor advised the two to leave since the is absolutely nothing they can do. But the both stayed there all the night mentioning random things about the sleeping boy weirdness and curtness.

🌻🌻🌻🌻

 After 3 days....

Kyuhyun was laying his head on the side of the bed while holding his lover warm hand, he was smiling to the comforting feeling, Even though Jongwoon was sleeping for couples of days he was so warm and Kyuhyun loved it.

He closed his eyes wanting to get some sleep and rest after having a hard day. That day he talked to his parents about his feeling to the man beside him.

His dad called him asking why he was being absent from home and classes for many days and the taller thought that it's the time to face things. Somehow he wanted to set things and get ride of all  his fears so when Jongwoon wakes up he can assure to the other that they can be together, that he is not afraid anymore, that now he is ready to do everything for the black haired guy.

 He was still not sure if Jongwoon still wanted him but he hoped for the best. He closed his eyes and adjusted his head in more comfortable position, but after few seconds only his eyes we're wide open, it was due the slight movements that he felt coming from the small hand that was on his much larger ones.

The older snapped his sigh to younger's face and noticed that the other was moving his eyebrows slightly. Kyuhyun rushed out of the room to call the doctor. His lover is finally waking up, that was all what he wished for, that was all what he need for that that time.

 The taller waited for the doctor to finish his examination outside the room. His heart was beating fast. He wanted to see his lover badly he missed him so much but he hold it, he have to patient, from that time on, he needed to be patient.

 Finally the door was opened, Kyuhyun didn't say anything he was looking at the doctor with eyes full of curiosity.

"He is awake now, his state is very stable but he needs to spend more days at the hospital. You can go back to the room but don't tire him. He still need to sleep” .

Kyuhyun just nodded his head and bowed to the doctor "Thank you for taking care of him". Said Kyuhyun with a thankful heart.

"It's my duty" answered the doc as he took his leave.

The brown haired man took a deep breath as he put his hand on the door lock entering the room where his lover was lying .

The sigh took his breath away. With confused, curious and yet cute face Jongwoon was looking around the room just like a little kid who found himself in new place for the first time.

“He is so cute, I wanna hug him” thought Kyuhyun.

 "Hey... " said Kyuhyun smiling as he approached the other's bed.

 "Hey... " answered Jongwoon with a weak voice, smiling back at the other.

That smile brought tears to Kyuhyun’s eyes. Jongwoon is there even that he is pale and weak but he is there smiling at him. Kyuhyun thought that he couldn't be happier. As he set on the only chair in the room that was near the bed, he took his lover’s hand on his and pulling it up close to his lips. He closed his eyes and plant soft kisses on the soft small hand.

"Hyung...? " said Jongwoon surprised by his hung’s sudden ultimate touch.

"Yes... Love" answered Kyuhyun, words skipping his lips unconsciously .and Kyuhyun thought it's so right. Finally he is doing and saying things in the right way.

Jongwoon’s eyes went wide open by hearing how the other just called him.

The smaller thought that Kyuhyun was acting weird. He was not Kyuhyun that he used to know at least for the last 6 months.

"A-Are you.. O-oK? "

 Kyuhyun couldn't hold himself and laugh lightly at his dongsaeng words. "I'm supposed to be the one who ask that question. Are you Ok... Love? "

"I'm fine I guess... But "

"But?! What?! Are hurt ? you are in pain ? Should I call the doctor again? Hold on I will... "

Kyuhyun stand up ready to leave the room but he stopped when he felt a little force pulling him back he turned around and found that the younger was holding his sweater and looking at him with that pair of black eyes. For a moment Kyuhyun lost himself in that black oceans, Jongwoon’s eyes were a real temptation, he could stare at them forever.

"It's not that kyuyu hyung.. " said Jongwoon pouting and pleasing his eyes.

And that’s it, Kyuhyun couldn’t hold it anymore, he uncontrollably leaned and pecked on Jongwoon's lips.

 Even that the black haired boy lips were dry and not rosy as usual he thought that nothing tasted better than them even the most expensive red wine on the earth.

Actually Kyuhyun wanted more than a peck but he thought that he should do things properly first. Taking his lover hand on his he sets back on the chair and smiled at the cute confused boy beside him.

“I have so many things to tell you, and I can see that you have a lot of questions to ask me. I will answer them all but not now, you need to rest more so what about you sleep now and we can talk tomorrow when you feel match better?”

Jongwoon looked at his hand that was wrapped on his Hyung ones, Kyuhyun was right, there was a lot of question running on his mind back then but to be honest he was so tired,  he felt that his eyes are becoming so heavy. He wonders why he was so sleepy while the doctor told him that he slept for a full 3 days. He wanted to talk to Kyuhyun but he choose to follow his hyung words, he nodded slightly and closed his eyes falling asleep.

“Right, sleep for now… thank you for waking up, thank you coming back to me… thank you”

Said Kyuhyun as he brushed his sleeping lover’s black locks.

🌻🌻🌻🌻

In the following days Kyuhyun couldn’t stay much with Jongwoon, because after that Jongwoon’s family heard that their son was on the hospital , Jongwoon mom decided to stay with her son to take care of him. And Although  that Kyuhyun and Siwon told her that they will take care of their dongsaeng and she doesn’t have to stay all the time with him since she have to take care of Jongwoon’s dad and Jongjin too, she said that Jongwoon needed her more and he is her priority.

Kyuhyun was a little upset cause all his plans to stay with the other boy was crushed but he couldn’t do anything, it was him mom after all.

🌻🌻🌻🌻

It was till the day when Jongwoon could walk almost normally and succeed to convince his mom that he could take care of himself that finally his mom decided to go back home.

And for the first time since he woke up Jongwoon stayed alone, Kyuhyun and Siwon were still at school and the both of them thought that he was still with him mom. It was then when he has a chance to think about all short of things that were clouding his mind for days.

It was Kyuhyun’s behavior that changed towards him.

It felt like the things are going on the opposite side , it’s not him anymore who’s giving a warm touches to the other or loving smiles but the one who received them all.

Since he woke up, Kyuhyun didn’t miss a chance to hold his hand or kiss his check even in front of his mom.

Jongwoon was thinking back about that night when he woke up, that three words, that peck , it felt like dream to him but he was aware that it was true. He was still waiting for Kyuhyun’s explication.  The both of them couldn’t stay together since his mom has never left his side so he still didn’t have any clue of why Kyuhyun was treating him like that.

At first, Jongwoon thought that Kyuhyun was in love with him, after that night when he and his hyung made what he thought was love he was pretty sure that the brown haired guy has some feelings for him and that Kyuhyun was just confused about them so he was trying to convince the other to accept him for a full 6 months. But he changed his mind when he saw Kyuhyun going out with that girl from the music department Sohyeon, she was every man’s dream. He witnessed when the both were sharing a passionate kiss in the school’s garden just one day before his incident.

That’s when he thought about things once again, Kyuhyun avoided him, he said that that night wasn’t love to him but just lust. He never said that he felt something for him. Kyuhyun always said that he loved him as friend and little brother only. Was Jongwoon  so blind to not see it, maybe Kyuhyun didn’t want to hurt him and push him back roughly so he just let his dongdaeng get close to him just to not hurt him.

Jongwoon thought that day, that he was stupid because he thought that Kyuhyun loved him back. He felt sorry that he was forcing himself on his favorite hyung, he felt sorry for making Kyuhyun uncomfortable for all that time .

That day, Jongwoon thought that maybe he should take Siwon’s mom offer and leave, leave to get ride of his feelings and give Kyuhyun the space that he needed.

He planned to give Kyuhyun his birthday gift, apologize for being so foolish and leave. If it wasn’t that incident, if Kyuhyun was on the time maybe he would be in Paris now with Siwon probably. 

Jongwoon’s train of thoughts stopped when he felt someone hugging from behi