Regrets and feelings.

The day after they met and the day where the Japanese disappear all of a sudden, Hansol quickly messaged him through the chat box asking about what happened and why he suddenly disappeared. But three days after Hansol didn't get any reply from Yuta. It made him feel bad. It was only hinting him how boring and awkward person he was.

Sometimes he would just forget about it because the more he was thinking of it the more he gets irritated and annoyed to himself. It was also affecting his mood on his work. How he regretted meeting up with him. How he wish he could turn back time.

"So how was it?" Ten suddenly asked popping his head on Hansol's working cubicle. Hansol looked at him with his tired looking big eyes. Ten's smiling face was only adding to his self-frustration. He just rolled his eyes on the younger. "Aw seems like you don't wanna talk about it again."

He turned to look at him again suddenly feeling confused on what Ten had just said.

"I've been asking you since the day after your meet up with him. Remember you told me about it", he uttered. "I guess, you had a hard time dealing with him. Don't worry, dude. There's still a lot of guys out there."

"He was pretty", Hansol said out of nowhere making Ten to stop from leaving. The younger just seemed to get interested on what Hansol said. "He was a Japanese and I find him pretty for a guy. I-I don't know maybe I was just too confident on meeting him. Maybe he realized how boring and awkward person I am." There was a sad smile curved on Hansol's lips as he remembered Yuta's beautiful smile and sparkling eyes.

Ten who was only listening to him just cross his arms before talking to Hansol. "What happened by the way?"

"Maybe he got offended when I rejected him."

"Rejected?" Ten's brows were furrowed in confusion. Hansol just scrunched his nose while playing his pen with his finger.

"He thought I was going to with him. He thought that was all I'm after for that's why I'm meeting up with him", he uttered while his attention where on his pen. "I didn't mean to reject him but I just want to make friends with him." He beamed at Ten who was startled to meet his eyes. "When you and Taeyong first met, did you also ...", Hansol trailed off and he saw Ten smiling.

"I was the one who asked for it", he confidently said. "Taeyong didn't refuse at all. I still couldn't forget how he told me that he wants some that night." Ten smiled proudly. "I forgot to warn you that it was a gay dating site so you'll probably meet different kinds of people. You just happen to meet someone who seeks pleasure and not friendship. Like I said, there's still a lot out there. Count that pretty Japanese guy on your experience."

When Ten left, Hansol thought maybe Taeyong was also like Yuta. But Ten was lucky to have him on his arms. Well, he couldn't argue on how friendly and open Ten could be so there was no problem for the latter making friends with anybody. That's what Hansol was lacking though, socialization.

Maybe he'll just take Ten's words as a reminder to himself. There's still a lot out there. There's still someone out there who's better than Yuta.

He leaned his back on his chair before shutting his eyes. Even though he regretted meeting up with Yuta, he also couldn't forget Yuta's beautiful face which reminded him of the city lights.

---

The day ended like the usual. Boring and lonely. When Hansol arrived at his apartment, he couldn't wait to take a shower before eating the dinner he bought on his way home. But before heading his way to the bathroom, he his laptop first and log in to the usual site.

He somehow felt excited upon typing the address of the site. But as soon as he was log in, his excitement died down when the only notification he wanted to see wasn't even there.

Fourth day and Yuta still wasn't replying. He shut his laptop in disappointment.

---

A week passed and the situation was still the same. Hansol would just shrug off the thought about it. Even the thought about the site he just wanted to forget everything for once in a while. He felt so hurt. He didn't know why but the impact brought a different kind of feeling like it was affecting his ego. Like reality was slapping him hard on how he was as a person.

He plopped his tired body on the mattress. For a few seconds, he stared at the white ceiling. His mind couldn't think of properly. He was tired from work and then again what happened a week ago suddenly flashback on his mind. What a bitter memory.

He sat up and he pushed his hair back while gently massaging his nape. He reached for his laptop on his bed side table. Out of nowhere, he log in again on the site and for once Hansol erased on his thoughts that maybe Yuta could be one of the notifications he will receive today.

But he was suddenly startled when he saw a message from the person whom he had been waiting to reply for almost a week already. He blinked twice in case he was just dreaming but he wasn't. It was really Yuta; cherryboy95, who messaged him. A smile was tugged on his lips as he opened the chat box.

Are you free tomorrow? I want to see you..same time and same place.

It wasn't a reply like what Hansol was expecting. It was just a simple invitation. Yuta wanted to see him. Well , he also wants to see the Japanese.

I'll see you, was his reply before he shut his laptop and he couldn't wait for the clock to strike at 12 indicating its Friday and he'll be seeing the Japanese again.

---

Friday came and Hansol never felt the time this slow. In every strike of the long hand just seemed to be so slow for Hansol. He couldn't wait to see him. So when the alarm rang, Hansol immediately cleaned his desk leaving all his unfinished work to be done by this weekend. He really needs to go.

"Whoa! Seems like you're in a hurry", Ten uttered once the younger saw him in the elevator. "I've never seen you this excited every time working hours end. Was there someone who's waiting for you at home?"

He glanced at Ten whose brows were wiggling and was waiting for his reply. Hansol couldn't help to give him a smile. He somehow couldn't hide his excitement.

"Aye, that smile", Ten commented and before the younger could continue the elevator door flung open and Hansol rushed to get out.

---

When he reached the hotel room where they first met he was surprised that it was all dark. The lights were out but the huge glass window was again displaying the beautiful view of the city lights. The curtain was slid to the side and when he followed the light reflected by the window he saw someone sitting on the floor whose gaze were too absorbed on watching the view not even bothered by his presence at all.

He shut the door silently. He waited for seconds for the person to notice him but it seemed like no effect at all. He walked closer to him. Even though it was dark he could still see him dressed in a black plaids with a white inner shirt and black jeans. Hansol find it cute when he saw the pink socks Yuta was wearing. 

"Yuta", he called and the Japanese slowly tore his gaze away from the window. Yuta was seemed to be stunned as he saw Hansol. Hansol cleared his throat. "Sorry to keep you waiting-", he was cut off when the Japanese stood up and ran for a hug.

"You're here now", Yuta whispered as he was hugging Hansol tightly.

Of course, Hansol was startled but later on, he slowly wrapped his arms around Yuta's waist and pulled him closer. Yuta smells like cherries that he couldn't help himself to take a sniff on the Japanese's hair.

"You smelled like a working man", Yuta uttered pulling away from the hug. "You sure are a very hardworking man."

He suddenly felt shy. He didn't know what was Yuta's point but all he could think of was that he may be smelling sweaty and bad.

"You don't smell bad", Yuta said surprising Hansol. It looked like Yuta was reading his mind. "You may think that I'm mocking you but I'm not. You smell good actually. Your scent, I like it."

"You smelled like cherries", Hansol commented despite of his shyness. Yuta just smiled at him and Hansol find it so bright.

"I'm happy you came", Yuta started as he sat again on the floor with his legs crossed. He patted his side for Hansol to join him. "I thought you will not come."

"Well, I wanted to see you too", Hansol said bluntly and later on, the both of them stared at each other. Hansol was the first one to break their stares as he realized the words he said. Clearing his voice he said, "I mean, yeah it's Friday so I think I need a time to relax and hangout." Though it was a clear nonsense reason to cover up what he said a while ago still he wanted to remain cool in front of Yuta.

The Japanese just smiled before silence took over the atmosphere. They dwell their eyes on the view in front of them. But Hansol, on the other hand, couldn't stop himself from thinking on asking Yuta about that morning. He wanted to ask the Japanese why he suddenly left without leaving a word to Hansol.

"Yuta?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"You're already asking me", he said then he chuckled.

"Sorry", Hansol was trying to find the right words to say. "Why did you.. why did you left that morning? Did I do something that made you feel bad? I'm- I'm really sorry if I offended you.. for rejecting you that night."

"Did you know that you're the first one who rejected me?" He asked making Hansol to f