“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud. 5 Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others. Love does not count up wrongs that have been done. 6 Love takes no pleasure in evil but rejoices over the truth. 7 Love patiently accepts all things. It always trusts, always hopes, and always endures”.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-6

Allie

           The sky was clear tonight, very different from yesterday. There’s not a cloud to be seen and the moon was bright and mysterious but that’s not what captured my attention, the stars did. They look like a billion fireflies trapped in space in a different array of colors sparkling in the night sky. I reached out my hand like I usually do and pretended to touch them as if by a miracle, their rays would reach me and give me strength. I knew that a million or even billions of miles away these smalls stars where actually massive balls of fire emitting intense heat. It was heat bright enough to reach a planet like ours.

            The wind blew against me and I pulled my legs closer to my chest and rested my chin on my knees just staring out into the moonlit night from the roof of our back porch. Our back porch was located just below my room with its roof easily accessible through my windows. This was my usual hangout every day after school just as soon as the sun set I would climb out of my bedroom window and sit on the roof with my checkered blanket wrapped around me and a book in hand. Tonight I had no blanket around me the night air didn’t feel cold like it used to.

            My eyes continued to take in the scenery of the surrounding I grew up in, mom’s yellow Soleil d’Or and red Bordeaux rose bushes grew next to our wooden white fence along with her plethora of other smaller sized flowers. Her garden was always immaculate like one of those high priced garden parks they have in the old towns of Europe. Beside the rose bushes grew our family’s oak tree, my great grandfather planted it before the depression now it stood near the house like an old baron looming over its subjects. My dad usually spends his afternoons reading company reports under the oak’s shade while my mom would sit by the porch swing drinking her ginger tea. Our garden was usually serene, within its tucked fences lined with roses only the hum of the birds feeding off the bird feeder could be heard. Occasionally the sound of cars passing by would disturb this peace inside our backyard since the road, heading to the beach, was just behind it.

            My gaze fell on the small pond that my dad made just a few years ago, the waters reflected the brick walls of our house. A thousand thoughts flashed through my brain, images of how the our house would look like in summer or what it would look like on Hallows Eve, my mom was always fond of decorations and holidays. So our house was always spick and span for a party. Without my mom’s creative touch our house was just like any other house in Springfield, almost all houses here had red brick or plank walls and shingled roofs. The architecture of the town was relatively Farmhouse and Southern in Style, with white columns lining the spacious front porches and large windows that let a lot of light into the rooms.

            I breathe in deep allowing the cold air to fill my lungs as my eyes scanned the ground below. The wind was blowing a little too strong for my liking and a few strands of my hair came loose from my ponytail, normally I would tuck it in but now I just let it be. I heard the creak of our trellis, filled with primroses, below and saw a young man climbing on to the roof.

            “Sorry I’m late.” I heard him say as he made his way towards me. In his hand he held his scruffy notebook that he never went without. Instead of answering I merely stared at him and his lopsided smile, at the back of my mind I could sense a hint of sadness behind it. Devon Sawyer why do always mess with my head?

            “So what have you been up to?” He casually asked me after he had settled himself beside me seating cross-legged. He leaned back resting his weight on his hands and gazed up at the stars. We stayed that way not saying anything for a few minutes before he broke the silence by whistling a song. I am familiar with the tune and soon enough I end up whistling along with him. When he finished the song he breathe in loudly and stretched out on the roof, lying down and resting his head on his arms.

            “It’s too quiet, the silence is killing me. My whole day has been too quiet actually.” He said as he continued to look up at the sky.

            “Well that’s shocking, you? Have a quiet day? Your one of the school charming’s, having a day without one girl fangirling over you is hard to believe.” I answered. Devon was part of the school varsity, he was good at sports particularly football which was actually hard to believe considering he had a small frame. Despite not having the same bulky exterior as his teammates D or Dev as the rest of the world calls him well except for me and his family, he is actually a very fast runner and his small structure makes it easier for him to evade the players from the other team. He has scored numerous home runs for our team which landed him a scholarship at a known university up in Arlington. Due to his popularity in the field a lot of girls swoon over him, of the majority are girls from the cheerleading squad and drama club.

            “Don’t believe me?” He asked with a smile. I shrugged my shoulders at him. It’s a surprise to some really how we became friends. He was the jock super popular type while I was the quiet nerdy type, to the eyes of some we weren’t on the same page to begin with. To others who don’t know me I was book-loving-Jesus-fearing type of girl who wouldn’t even dare to socialize with popular kids since they believe that people who go to church are allergic to extroverts. All that is a lie of course, yes I’m a God fearing girl but my life wasn’t just all about books and studies, I actually play sports namely volleyball and badminton and Naj is not the party going type.

            “I’m sure you did something horrible that’s why nobody bugged you.” I told him snickering. He continued to smile and stare at the night sky, I on the other hand waited for an explanation.

            “Well?” I asked him growing impatient.

            “Trina and I broke up.” He said calmly while I took in what he had said.

            “What?!!!” I yelled as soon as reality sunk in.

            “Are you crazy?!! She was the girl of your dreams you idiot! After all the hardships you went through just to make her your girl...” I ranted but I wasn’t able to finish what I was saying because as soon as I began raising my voice he got up and started walking away from.

            “D!” I called after him.

            “Thought I should let you know that Trina and I are over that’s why I came up here.” He answered before making his way down the porch roof using our garden trellis. I stared after him with mouth agape, sometimes I think that my best friend has an undiagnosed mental problem. The heck he threw away all his efforts for what? I snapped out of my daze when I realized that I forgot to ask him why he had broken up with Trina. I was about to call after him but he was already halfway through his bedroom window so it was no use calling after him. D and I lived next to each other, his bedroom was across from mine. His house was almost identical to mine minus the excessively large wrap around porches that my mother insisted we have. I watched as he disappeared into his room and heaved a heavy sigh. I sat back down again and watched as the stars hid behind clouds that creeped into the night. The darkening skies mirrored my turbulent emotions. Shouldn’t I be happy that they were over? I rolled my eyes at my own thoughts if I had been my old self I would have been happy but so many things had changed now. I love him that was a fact but in the state I am now, my love wouldn’t even matter.

            I felt something wet trickle through my cheeks, I’m not crying am I? Was it even possible for me to cry? Regrets filled my mind, maybe if I had been brave enough back then, if I had swallowed up my fear and told him straight on that I love him maybe things wouldn’t have turned out this way. I stared down at my clammy looking hands and pushed back a whimper threatening to fall. He was leaving for college, leaving this town, leaving me and no amount of crying or begging could ever stop him from going.

            My vision started to get hazy and I realized that rain had started to fall. The view disappeared beneath the heavy rainfall just like how my memories of him were starting to blur. I closed my eyes beneath the downpour and relived the memories I have of him, memories of us growing up and memories of me stuck forever as his best friend and never anything more.

9 years ago

            Two children sat under an oak tree by the backyard, they were seating on a checked cloth while eating peanut butter sandwiches and drinking lemonade. The summer heat falling directly on to the town below. They hid behind the shade of the ancient oak tree planted during the 1940’s by one of the children’s great-grandfather. There was a picnic basket beside them as well as an old ragdoll and a toy robot. They were happily talking about random stuff as they ate.

            “Hey A what do you want to be when you grow up?” one of the children who was a young boy of 6 asked his companion who happened to be a girl.

            “Me? I don’t know. How about you?” She asked him.

            “Me? I’ll be a businessman and own a large company! Then I’ll build a big house where you and I would live!” The boy answered excitedly.

            “Why would I live with you?” The girl asked as she stopped drinking her lemonade.

            “Cos I’m gonna marry you silly.” The boy answered.

            “Why would I marry you?” The girl asked.

             “That way we will always be together.” He replied happily.

            “Oh, I see.” The girl said giggling.

            Just then two women in floral dresses came out of the back door and called them.

            “Devon! Allie! Get inside now it’s time to go.” Said one the woman in a blue floral dress.

            “Bring the blanket and picnic basket you used.” Said the other in a yellow floral dress.

            “Ok mom.” Said the boy as he folded the blanket while the girl placed the plates and glass they used inside the picnic basket.  They hurriedly stood up when they heard the door closing and ran towards the back porch towards the house.

            I hugged my knees tighter towards me as the rain grew louder completely disregarding that I should go back inside my room now instead of sitting out here on the roof in the pouring rain. We were so young back then, D didn’t know what he was talking about, he didn’t know what getting married really meant. It was all a child’s fancy, an innocent child’s tale.

2 years ago

            I sat down in my usual spot under the oak tree, just like how I had seated under it ever since I was 6. I was reading the latest Nancy Drew novel that my dad had bought me when he went to Arlington. I was near the end of the book when someone pulled me by my shoulders and pulled me close to a tight hug.

            “A!” I heard Devon squeal like a child given a piece of Halloween chocolate.

            “What?!” I asked with a hint of irritation as I removed myself from his hug.

            “I’ve found the girl of my dreams!” He shouted happily.

            “Who?” I asked nonchalantly as I made a space for him to seat.

            “She is in my class.” He said happily. I gave him a questioning look.

            “The girl of my dreams has long hair, cute almond shaped eyes and a cute nose.” He went on.

            I had a hunch who the girl of his dreams were. He would always tell me that we would grow old together and have kids that wear shirts with polka dots.

            “Let me guess, it’s...” I began.

            “It’s Trina.” He confessed happily causing me to put down my book and look up at him.

            “Who?” I asked trying to check if I had misheard him.

            “You know, Trina Hanley from Ohio? The new girl in class.” He said as he took a seat beside me acting all giddy and love sick.

            It felt as though my mouth has gone dry from his words. I had always pictured what my life with him would be like, finishing high school, graduating from a college and get married and connect our houses together. It felt as though all the days we spent planning our future had suddenly disappeared into ashes. I felt so naïve and so utterly lost. Wasn’t he the one who made up countless plans about us growing old together? Building our lives around each other? Going to the same college up in Arlington, we even argued about what course we would be taking since he wanted our jobs to align with each other. He would be the engineer and I would be the architect, we would build our dream house together connecting our two separate houses in a large Victorian style glass house. He even went as far as picking out names for our future kids! Now it felt as though everything he had ever said to me was child’s play, it was as if he built me a house made of diamonds which later turned to glass as soon as the clock struck midnight.

            “A. Are you listening?” he asked me with a hint of irritation.

            I snapped out of my thoughts and hastily answered.

            “What, sorry I wasn’t listening.”

            “You should really stop daydreaming A, other people would think you’re weird.” He said causing me to stop my hands from inserting the bookmark in the page I was at. Since when had he ever thought that I was weird? My daydream never bothered him before.

            “Well me I wouldn’t mind since I’m your friend and I’m use to you being like that but Trina would think you’re a little weird.”

            Friend? Correction I’m not just any friend I’m your Best friend! I felt my blood boil with anger.

            “I have to go mom said we’re going out tonight.” I said as I stood up. I brushed the dry leaves off my skirt.

            “I don’t remember aunt Em making any plans for eating out.” He said in confusion.

            “It’s a spur of the moment dinner out.” I replied slinging my bag pack on my shoulder as fast as I could.

            “A? Did I say something wrong?” He asked but I merely walked away.

            “A?! Are you mad?” he yelled after me but I paid no heed and got inside the house not forgetting to lock the door knowing well enough that he would come into our house comfortably.

            I avoided him for a week, in class I wouldn’t talk to him even our moms got affected