Story Title: Crying and Begging

Author: corry_ss and chubbybaek

Status: Completed

Description: 

World always looks brighter when we were younger, but everything changes when we become adult. The laugh and happiness that I shared with them was the best time that I won't forget. I want to stay like that forever.

I guess, it's just a foolish wish.

If only I try to care more. I can see their crying and begging clearly.

Because, that's my only regret.

Jimin... Jungkook... it's not too late, right?

Description and Foreword: 3/5 

The description itself is quite interesting as it does capture the essence of what a lot of us think about. How we all savour our childhood and past, since ignorance is bliss - we were all happy then not knowing anything. There are a few grammatical issues here and there e.g. it shoudl start with The world, and when we are younger. Other than that it is quite a great way to introduce the story, as the story does go into detail about how the relaitonship between the three main characters changes as time goes by. 

Grammar and Punctuation: 3/5

Like stated above, there are a few grammatical mistakes here and there but it does not detract from the overall enjoyment of the story. I'd recommend you find a beta reader or re-read your story to correct any mistakes you find (as I find that more often than not, we make grammar mistakes from writing too quickly).

Character Development: 4/5

I liked how you showed a contrast in the relationship when the three characters were younger and their relationship in the present. I wish you could've gone more in depth about how Jimin tried to put more effort into "saving their relationship". It was a lovely story, as you get to see the thoughts of all three characters but more in depth logic about each charcter's actions would've immensely helped the story flow more :)

Story Plot: 4/5

I really loved the story idea - the idea of childhood friends growing apart but always having a special bond that holds them together. I liked how the story progressed as well as the idea of Jungkook being in a scandal. I wished the scandal and the events leading to him disappearing could've been focused on a bit more to make the story a bit more impactful. The ending killed me though, it was quite a surprise considering a lot of the one-shots I end up reading are very fluffy. It was a very realistic story, and I defintely enjoyed finding out the history between the 3 childhood friends. 

Writing Style: 4/5

I quite enjoyed your writing style it was straght to the point but still had some details to help the reader visualize the story. The epilogue was very well written, I especially liked how you began the chapter. The reason why I took away a mark was because of the ordering of each section in the story sometimes made it hard to keep up with.

Enjoyment: 4/5

Like I said earlier, it was a great read. As it is a one-shot (+ an epilogue) it was a quick one to read and it helped because in one way or another, readers are going to be able to relate to some aspect of the story. It was great being able to see the story from different character's points of view as well as it provided a more wholesome story. 

Total: 22/30