#Amber

I know this day would come. It’s the day when I finally had someone by my side for a lifetime. All of my doubt, fear, and everything went away as he stand and stay by my side. I’m glad I have him. I’ll never regret what I’ve choose.

I still remember the day we met, we spent time together, the struggle we went through with tears and pain, and now we’ve made it this far.

*flashback*

*sound of books fell*

“Sorry,”

“No, I’m the one who should be sorry. Are you okay?”

“I’m okay. Thank you so much,”

“You’re welcome. I have to go now. See you later,”

*end of flashback*

I don’t know if you remember it or not. But, that’s exactly the first time we met. You probably forget me the second time we met, ‘cause I’ve changed. I’m not a bookworm like the old times. I never have the courage to say that I fell in love with you at the first sight. Your smile, your eyes and everything attached to you. To be honest, I’m your secret admirer at that time. For some reason, I changed. Just to get closer with you, I tried to be approach you and your friend by showing my “new” image.

*flashback*

“Hmm, excuse me. May I sit here? There seems to be no free seats,”

“Sure, you may.”

“Thank you,”

“Are you new here? I’ve never seen someone like you here,”

“Yeah, we’ve never seen you before,”

“Ah, yes.”

“What is your name? I’m Kris,”

“I’m Amber. Nice to meet you, Kris”

“Nice to meet you too, Amber. Meet my friends!”

*end of flashback*

I was so happy and nervous at that time. I’m afraid your friend would look down on me. But, I was wrong. They accepted me just like you did. I’m glad I have friends now. We hang out together, play basketball together, and everything like couples do. Even though, I know you were never thought of me more than a best friend.

*flashback*

“Hey! You two! Just get together already,”

“Yeah, you looked so good together,”

*end of flashback*

I blushed. I still remembered it. But when I looked at you, you didn’t seem to feel the same. And what I’m afraid of became real. Your heart weren’t for me. You have a girlfriend, and I’m shocked even though I didn’t show it to you.

*flashback*

“I’m happy for you, Kris,”

“Thank you, Amber. You’re my best friend,”

“Please be happy,”

*end of flashback*

Did you know? At that time, I tried to hold back my tears. I run away from you right after I said that and cried for –maybe- a week. I know it’s too much, but I did. I just loved you too much. I guess seeing you be happy with another girl is not making me happy, but I have to.

All of our friends cheering on me, but that is just not enough. I tried to forget what I feel for you because I know I’m not mean to you. But am I really not mean to you?

You told me about your relationship with her, how you’re so close to each other and that you’re going to get engaged. I can’t accept it, but what can I do?

*flashback*

“Amber, guess what?” you said while showing your hand.

“Hmm, what is it?”

“I’m engaged.” You sure know how to stab me right in my heart whether it is your sweetness or the pain you gave to me without you knowing it.

“That’s great. I’m happy for you,”

“Thank you, Amb! When will you follow me?”

“I don’t know. I have someone in my heart, but I guess he’s not for me.”

“Hey! Cheer up, buddy! If he’s for you, then he’ll come to you,”

“Thank you, Kris,”

*end of flashback*

I decide to take my steps away from you. I left without a warning but a letter that I gave to Luhan. I said to him to give it to you, and to never tell you where I live. I think it’s the best way to keep you happy with your loved ones and keeping me from breaking apart.

*flashback*

“Do you really need to go?” Luhan asked.

“I need to if I want to be happy,”

“We’ll miss you here. Call us anytime, okay?”

“I’ll miss you guys and I will call you. Please, don’t tell him about me other than the letter.”

“May you find your happiness, Amb! We love you,”

*end of flashback*

And I live my hard life in Paris as a designer. Without thinking of going back and taking every risk to stay alive.  With all of my hard work, I finally success. Being alone sure is not what I hope to. But what else can I ask for? You probably already live your happy life out there with your loved ones. And I’m glad I buried my feel for you deep inside just for your happiness.

But, it’s not what it meant to be.

*flashback*

“May I meet the designer?”

“Yeah, it’s me. May I help you?” a cat got my tongue. It’s you.

“Amb… it’s me,” yeah, I know. It’s you, my long forgotten first love.

“Yeah, I know it’s you, Kris. May I help you, my best friend?” I tried to be professional.

“Can we talk somewhere more private?”

“Sorry, but I’m still working.”

“I’ll wait for you then.”

*end of flashback*

To my surprise, you did waiting for me. On that crazy rainy day, you wait for me outside. You know that I can’t ignore you. Seeing you after 3 years, it makes me happy.

*flashback*

“Why did you do this? You’ll get sick, you know?”

“I did this for you,”

“For me? Kris, your wife would looking for you now,”

“Forget it. I’ve been searching for you these past 3 years. I’m sorry, Amb.” You said as you hugged me.

“Sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong. Why did you feel sorry?”

“Sorry for not being someone you wish to, for not be there when you needed me, for not realizing that you gave your heart for me, for being so stupid by going with someone else and for not realizing that deep inside my heart, I love you more than anything,” I just stood there on your arms. I don’t know what to say.

*end of flashback*

I cried. Yes, I admit it. I don’t know what I’m feeling at that time. Happy, nervous, sad, and confuse mixed over.

*flashback*

“Amb, would you give me a chance?”

“Sorry Kris. But, you already have a wife. I don’t want to bother you and your family. Beside, my feeling towards you have gone a long time ago,”

“Amb, please..”

“Kris, please. You have your happy life, why bother searching for someone like me?”

“Because I love you, and I can’t have a happy life without you,”

“Kris, I can’t. How about your wife?”

“I’ve never married yet.”

“But you’re engaged, right?”

“She told me to chase after my true love and she is supporting me.”

“Is it because of my letter? I’m sorry for ruining your engagement, your happy life,”

“Amber, I’ve told you that my life is to be with you. You don’t need to be sorry,”

*end of flashback*

I just cried like I don’t care. I don’t what is happening.

On that rainy day, you said something I’ve dreamed about.

*flashback*

“Amber, please don’t cry.” you wiped away my tears.

“It just I can’t believe it.”

“You have to believe it that now I’m here,” you said and kneel.

“Kris?”

“Amber, would you be my one and only wife for the rest of my life?” I froze and then cried (again).

“Yes, I would.” You put the ring you brought to my finger.

“I love you, Amber” you hugged me and kissed me.

*end of flashback*

I don’t know how many times I cried that day. Just like a dream, you came to me and once again my feeling towards you became deeper than before.

And here I am today in white wedding gown, veil, and mixed feelings. Happy, nervous and excited comes along with Butterflies in my tummy.

“Honey, are you ready?” my mom entered.

“Yes, I’m ready mom.” I answered.

“Look at how beautiful you are. I can’t believe you’re getting married. I’m so happy,” my mom hugged me.

“Thanks for everything mom. I love you,” I said.

“I love you, honey,”

On my way to the altar, all eyes on me and there you are waiting for me. I can’t stop admiring your face, the one that going to be my one and only husband. Saying our promises to stay by each other side for any situation and not to leave until death told us apart.

“You may kiss your bride,” the Pastor said.

Our face was just an inch apart when you whispered something to me.

“I love you,” you kissed me and the guest gives applause.

“I love you too, Kris”

I’ve always loved you.

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Krisber forever!! Krisber Fighting!!