I KNOW ONE OF YOU DID IT.

I KNOW ONE OF YOU DID IT.

I KNOW ONE OF YOU DID IT.

It rings in his head on replay. He never knew that only a few words could make him feel like the whole world is falling due to destruction. He holds onto his chest as he is panting uncontrollably. He wishes this whole situation is just a dream. He hopes he fell asleep in Yuta’s car and he’s just dreaming about this. But this is too vivid to be a dream. The question of whether everything is a coincidence is answered: it’s not. Someone put those bloody scissors in Taeil’s bag, and someone definitely put the picture and note on Taeyong’s computer. The worst knowledge of all is that this picture and note was not emailed; they were physically put onto his computer, meaning that someone went into his apartment and typed the note.

As a result of this knowledge, Taeyong feels the need to vomit. His eyes are already watering as red forms in eyes like a virus spreading. He tries to avoid making eye contact with the picture on the screen because it will send him back to three years ago when he actually witnessed this event. He cannot even describe the feeling he had at that time because it was like all of his emotions were locked in a box. At the moment, he feels the exact same. He doesn’t know what to do, and he freezes. Questions form in his brain like a stampede, and the more the questions arise, the shakier he becomes.

I have to get out, he thinks immediately. All he can think about is running. It’s difficult though because he doesn’t know where to run to. He would go to Yuta’s house, but he’s probably sleeping in his messy room in which Taeyong has avoided for all his life. There’s no way he’s going to step in there no matter how desperate he is. Even if he wants to run, he’s afraid to go outside in the silent darkness. The person who put the picture and note on his computer could be out there waiting for him.

Taeyong has no escape. It would be insane and a miracle if he actually did have one. But he decides anywhere besides his own apartment is a Heaven. Without thinking, Taeyong stumbles off his spinning chair and reaches for the door knob in which one twist can lead him to an unpredictable future. Nevertheless, he walks out with trippy feet, not knowing if he can survive even a few more steps.

He’s going crazy.

The world is red. The feeling of guilt, betrayal, and confusion fills his black heart that is about to turn to ash. He doesn’t know if he should be taking his car or if he should walk around like a strange man about to blow up into pieces. If he drives his car, he’s bound to get into an accident because his mind is too boggled. Taeyong is doomed.

As a matter of fact, he feels . He feels exposed and ashamed and completely helpless. He has felt like this for so long, but all of these traits are finally shining under the stars in the night sky. Johnny was someone he knew and was closely associated with. No matter how desperate, there’s no way he can ever erase that fact. This is not something he can erase like something off a whiteboard.

The most painful part is Johnny was no friend to Taeyong. He was definitely not a friend.

Taeyong thinks and thinks before he can conclude a decision of where the hell he’s going and how he’s going to be safe. His decision is deranged, but it’s the only one he can think of. He walks down sidewalks and crosswalks before he can finally land at his desired destination. Even he thinks he’s going completely bonkers as to why his decision just happens to be here at this white, brick house. Usually the average person would stay in his or her home and remain there to hide, but Taeyong chooses the opposite. He wants to feel protected because his apartment is last place he wants to be.

As a result, he knocks on the door, still shaky and ready to fall onto his knees anytime soon. He feels horrible because it is the middle of the night. Taeyong will probably piss the guy off (at least that’s what he thinks). Taeyong feels completely hopeless. He looks like a mess. His black hair is ruffled and out-of-place, his eyes are watery and red, and he is panting like there is no tomorrow. Unfortunately, he already feels like there actually is no tomorrow for him. He hears a click which means the door is being opened. He’s a bit startled because the door opens way faster than he thought it would.

 “T-Taeyong?” A soft voice is heard once the door opens fully. It is pleasant to hear his voice and see his face. “What are you doing here?”

“Ten,” Taeyong speaks his name under his breath. Ten is surprised to see Taeyong at his front door in the middle of the night, especially after Yuta’s party that made Taeyong and him want to self-destruct. He eyes Taeyong and sees the teary-eyed guy who is shaking like crazy. At first, he thought Taeyong was shaking because it might’ve been cold outside, but the temperature is neutral, so something else must be triggering such a reaction. “I-I’m sorry. Did I wake you?”

“Oh, no!” Ten denies wholeheartedly. The weird thing is that Ten reflects Taeyong’s face like a mirror: teary-eyed and broken. Taeyong wonders if Ten got the picture and note as well. “I couldn’t sleep.” Ten talks quietly and bitterly as he glances at the ground like he is uneasy, but he senses that Taeyong is in the same situation. A tight squeeze occurs in Taeyong’s heart as he sees the crushed Ten who is always cheerful 24/7. “What brings you here?” He offers Taeyong a smile, but Taeyong already knows it is false. After all the things that happened from the party, there is absolutely no way a smile can be formed naturally.

“I-I—“ Taeyong has always been awkward around Ten. Ever since middle school, seeing him from afar was the norm, and he intended for it to remain that way. He cannot believe how much he’s stuttering at the moment, but his speech can no longer be controlled. “There was—.” At this very moment, Taeyong begins to panick. Tears trickle down his cheeks, and he paces from left to right, trying to calm himself down. “Th-There was this— Johnny was—“ He wants to finish his sentences, but it feels impossible because of how much he’s crying.

“T-Taeyong!” It is now Ten’s turn to feel startled upon seeing Lee Taeyong, the most emotionless and hard-headed guy he’s ever met, become a broken mess. “Are you alright?” Ten immediately pulls the guy inside his home and sits him down on the beige living room couch. Taeyong holds onto his head while scrunching up his black hair, rocking back and forth like a little kid crying in a corner. All Ten hears is sobbing and sniffing which sends a sharp pain in his stomach. “Hey,” Ten whispers morosely like a mother taking care of her son. He gently sits next to Taeyong’s left, placing his hand on Taeyong’s back before asking, “Wh-What about Johnny?”

Taeyong sloppily wipes off his tears with his black sleeves while Ten pats his back softly. He’s utterly embarrassed that he’s showing Ten, of all people, the state he’s in. He honestly wishes the person was Yuta because Yuta has seen him in all the worst states possible, but the guy is probably sleeping his off and again, his bedroom is a legitimate trash can.

Despite the horrific note left on Taeyong’s computer, Taeyong does not know if telling Ten will benefit either one of them in any way. Ten is already exhausted from the party; Taeyong doesn’t want him to be any more exhausted by telling him about the note. He has no idea if it is a good idea to tell Ten.

The note said, “I know one of you did it,” which means Ten is suspected as well. It is wrong to Taeyong for even suspecting Ten. This guy is as sweet as a bag of cotton candy. But Taeyong keeps his mouth shut knowing that nothing will come out of it if he tells Ten. Something is holding him back, and he doesn’t know why. Telling Ten about the note will only scare the guy, not help him.

“I can’t stop thinking about him. It’s driving me insane,” Taeyong answers softly as he calms down a bit. “I can’t even sleep and I can’t even go into my own bathroom.” He covers his face with both hands, feeling like it is the end of the world. He’s a ticking time bomb, and he only has one second left.

“Hey,” Ten mutters again but with more care as he pats Taeyong’s back repeatedly. He realizes that he has no right to tell him that everything will be alright because it’s not—not in his world afterall. If someone told Ten that everything will be alright, he would probably punch them right on the nose. “I can’t either.” Taeyong lifts his head in order to look at Ten and gives him an expression of slight hurt. Out of the four, Ten was the closest to Johnny. He is most definitely the one who is hurting the most, but he keeps up his smile and works through every day. “I can’t sleep. Every single time I close my eyes, his face shows up.”

“What do we do, Ten? I can’t live like this anymore,” Taeyong pleads like Ten actually has an answer, but he knows just as much that Ten doesn’t. The atmosphere remains quiet for a few seconds before Ten decides that Taeyong needs rest even though it is nearly impossible. He grabs Taeyong’s left arm and stands up, pulling the guy along with him to his bedroom down the hallway behind them. Taeyong is astounded and just stares at Ten in confusion.

“Here, sit down. I know that you live alone, so you have no one with you most of the time. And I, too, also live alone for a lot of my days because my parents and sister are always out. So I know how you feel. I am always restless because of what happened three years ago. So, Taeyong, I know this is pretty impossible but do this for me.” Ten places his hands on Taeyong’s shoulders and makes him sit down on his bed. “For me, go to sleep. Think of it as you’re sleeping in my place.”

“Wh-What? How about you?” Taeyong questions, still a bit confused. He can’t possibly steal Ten’s bed. His face is all swollen from his crying which has him embarrassed.

“I’ll be here, don’t worry.” Ten smiles which sends warmth to Taeyong. “I know it’s difficult, but we’re all exhausted. You deserve an escape from reality, okay?” Ten is right. Taeyong needs rest more than anything. Ten pulls up the blanket and allows Taeyong’s legs to slip inside. Taeyong wants to reject such a request, but nothing comes out of his mouth. He just watches Ten try his best to tuck him in. “I’ll sit here until you fall asleep.” Ten plops onto the ground at the side of the bed as Taeyong lies awkwardly yet appreciatively.

Silence overcomes the room. Ten is definitely right. Taeyong is in need of sleep. It has been a while since the last time he’s ever felt this exhausted, and he even stays up at least three nights just working on his books. He’s never even felt this exhausted. Death can cause one’s world to blow up in flames.

“Hey, Ten?” Taeyong says in a soft voice as he eyes the back of Ten’s head. Ten sits on the left side of him, on the ground beside the bed, with his knees close to his chest. It is weird because these two were never close, but they knew each other. They acknowledged each other. But they never talked much—not until now.

“Hm?” Ten hums without looking behind him. If he looked behind, he would see Taeyong’s face staring at him with a wondering expression.

“What do you think it would be like if that hadn’t happened?” Taeyong’s question is complicated to answer but it is somewhat obvious. Ten has to think of the correct words before he opens his mouth. He takes a deep breath and plays with the carpet on the ground, feeling its texture and occupying himself with something else other than horrid thoughts.

“Johnny would be alive,” Ten answers sternly, his face serious yet full of despair. There is a slight pause in their conversation. “Hey, Taeyong?” Ten asks in the same tone as him when he called for his name.

“Hm?” Taeyong responds in the same way but more soft and near silent.

“Why did you avoid me during our high school years?” Ten inquires with uncertainty. He expects to hear words come out of Taeyong’s mouth, but he hears nothing. He waits a few more seconds before he can turn his head. “Taeyong?” He twists his head around only to see a sleeping Taeyong who looks peaceful yet still broken on the inside.

Ultimately, Ten stands on his feet and begins to take his leave, carefully and quietly shutting the door in order to not wake Taeyong. After he closes the door, a look of bitterness comes across his face, something irking him in the inside.

Everything is blurry, and the world takes a few seconds to clear up as Taeyong opens his eyes. It takes a few blinks, but reality becomes relevant. He sees that he is not on his computer desk or on his own bed and remembers everything that happened last night—especially the note. As much as he wishes it was a dream, the appearance of Ten’s bedroom tells him that it definitely was not a dream.

A sharp pain shoots inside Taeyong’s brain, making him hold his head with a groan. The stress is hurting him physically which has him frustrated. His heartbeat races from the note on his computer, but he tries to ignore it as he climbs off the bed and opens the door. The morning is bright which has him squinting his eyes as he walks down the hallway.

He seriously can’t believe his own self for actually coming to Ten’s house. He was having a mental breakdown, yes, but he still can’t believe it lead him to going to Ten’s house. Is he stupid, or is he stupid?

“Morning!” Ten’s voice slightly shocks the hell out of him as the guy’s face pops out from behind the wall at his right side. That radiant smile can make one melt like wax next to fire. “Well, actually, afternoon.”

“Good morn— wait. Did you just say afternoon?” Taeyong’s eyes are going to pop out of his face any time soon.

“Yes I did! You slept till 2 o’clock. I mean, it’s quite understandable because you came here at around 3-ish, and you were pretty restless,” Ten explains to Taeyong, making him want to punch his own self. Not only did he sleep for eleven hours, he even took Ten’s bed. He wants to punish himself like there’s nothing else to live for because this is Ten he’s talking about.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Taeyong sighs as he mentally curses at himself. “I’m really, really, really sorry. I must’ve caused you so much trouble! I-I—“

“Don’t worry about it! It’s nice to have some company once in a while,” Ten returns, having Taeyong feel slightly better. This is Ten’s talent: making people feel at ease. “I have to go dance soon, so I’ll drive you home.”

“Oh, you don’t have to. I’m totally fine with just walking—“

“Do you honestly think I’m going to let you walk home?” Ten eyes Taeyong, judging him which makes Taeyong feel extra stupid. Taeyong gives in and follows him out the door. Honestly, if Ten would’ve let him walk home, he wouldn’t walk to his apartment. He wants to avoid that place as long as he can. He doesn’t even want to see his computer because he’s afraid of that message.

Ten leads him to his black car and opens the passenger seat door like he’s some kind of master and Ten is his servant. Taeyong wants to erase himself from this world from his embarrassment. Ten shouldn’t be doing all these things for him, and Taeyong feels as if he’s taking advantage of the guy. Taeyong climbs onto the passenger’s seat, and Ten hops onto the driver’s seat. This has Taeyong wondering.

“If you have a car and can drive, why did Yuta pick you up? Couldn’t you have driven there yourself?” Taeyong asks a logical question that Ten sighs upon.

“Your best friend just happened to find me dancing with my crew and insisted that I come to his birthday party. He didn’t leave me a choice,” Ten explains with a tired tone because he completely regrets letting that happen. “You know Yuta. He’s always taking control. He’s been like that since high school.” Ten is reminded of the question that he asked to Taeyong last night but didn’t get an answer to about high school.

High school was probably the most memorable time of the four’s life. Many events happened there that they could never forget. It is like an irremovable stain, stuck to their lives forever.

Ten drives around town while questioning Taeyong the directions to his apartment, and soon enough, they arrive without any interruptions. Taeyong is still skeptical of everything. They are parked right outside of his apartment door, and Taeyong does not want to leave the car no matter what. But he does anyway, avoiding any difficulties in Ten’s schedule because of himself.

“Thank you, Ten. I don’t know how I can repay you.” Taeyong gives his proper appreciations before shutting the door. “I honestly feel awful for everything.”

“Don’t feel bad. If you need anything, just ask. Oh! Give me your cell phone number.” Ten reaches for his phone in his black sweater pocket and types in the passcode. He pokes around his phone through several apps and ends up onto the contact list, clicking the plus button in order to add a new contact. He hands the phone to Taeyong who is put on the spot. Taeyong punches in his phone number and hands the phone back to Ten who just smiles at him. “Have a good day.

And don’t get caught.”

Taeyong’s eyes widen before he questions the strange sentence, “Caught?” The shakiness returns and he steps back a little bit as he sees Ten’s straight face. He doesn’t understand. Caught? Caught from what? He can’t tell if Ten knows about the message or not. If he did, that means he would suspect the other three which includes him.

“Caught not resting, idiot,” Ten assures with a small chuckle that lifts heavy bricks off Taeyong’s shoulders. Taeyong gives an awkward, forced chuckle in order to lighten the atmosphere a little bit. His heartbeat slows down a bit, but he is still tense. In the end, Taeyong shuts the car door with his shaky hands, and Ten takes his leave.

Right after Ten drives away, Taeyong hears a distant slam of a car door and flinches a bit before looking to see who is angry enough to slam their own car door like that.

“Lee. Tae. Yong! What the is wrong with you?!” It’s Yuta, and he’s as angry as a raged ape that got her child stolen. Taeyong closes his eyes, ready to yell back at this dude who dares to raise his voice at him. “I called you like 300 hundred times, and you never picked up. Do you understand how worried I was?!” Yuta stomps over to Taeyong who is done with his friend’s crap. Sure it wasn’t completely Yuta’s fault, but Taeyong became completely exhausted because of yesterday’s events.

“Who are you? My mom?” Taeyong sasses the hell out of the guy whose jaw drops 90 degrees. “Why would you even call me over 300 hundred times?! If someone doesn’t pick up after the third call, it means he or she is busy, you !”

“Excuse me!” Yuta clicks his tongue before threatening to beat this guy up, but at this moment in his life, he’s completely used to Taeyong’s attitude towards him. “And who was that? Who dropped you off?”

“Why do you care?” Taeyong spats fire, knowing Yuta can be the nosiest best friend of all time. Yuta gives him silence as he shows an expression full of judgment. His arms are crossed as his tongue pokes the inside of his cheek, looking like there is some sort of sphere sticking out. “Fine! Ten! You happy?”

“Ten?! Oh, Taeyong be gettin’ it—“

“Shut up.” Taeyong knew that guy was going to !

“We’re leaving. Let’s go,” Yuta demands easily, walking behind Taeyong and then pushing his back hastily. Taeyong doesn’t even get a say and is pushed inside Yuta’s car. Yuta shuts the door and heads to the driver’s seat naturally.

“Where are we going this time?” Taeyong was set up yesterday to go to a place he never wanted to go back to in his entire life. If Yuta has another place up his sleeve, Taeyong swears he is going to slap the life out of the guy.

“Jung Jaehyun’s basketball game. He gave me a few tickets as a present and turns out it is today, so we’re going.” Taeyong takes a deep breath, about to curse at the guy, but he keeps it in. He realizes that he’s going somewhere else besides his own apartment which is completely necessary for him. He can’t go back there and if he were to go inside, he would want Yuta to go inside with him in order to have a sense that he’s not alone. “Oh!” Yuta is shocked. “You’re not opposing?”

“Just drive,” Taeyong concludes frustratingly. Yuta turns on some tunes on the radio and beings to sing awfully to them. Taeyong still wonders how they even became best friends. But he knows that Yuta is significant in his life. Yuta is always there for him and always has been since middle school.

It takes about thirty minutes to reach the gymnasium that the basketball game is occurring at. There are tons of cars which signals that these teams are quite popular and worthy of a watch. It takes a while to get in since it is so crowded, but the two manage to get in without serious difficulties. There is tons of talking which Taeyong is not fond of. He’s a quiet person, often staying in places where there are less people. It is quite rare for him to go to places like this which means there is a reason he’s there: he’s avoiding his home.

Taeyong follows Yuta who seems to be waving at someone with a brilliant smile that he hasn’t seen in years. He looks up to see who Yuta is smiling at and realizes the person is Hansol, Yuta’s chef at his restaurant that set up the surprise party. Great. Now Taeyong is the third wheel, but honestly, he has no problem with that. The two sit down at the edge of the row in order for an easy way to get out. But the worst part is that they have to move their legs in order for people to get to the middle of the aisle. This is what Taeyong hates the most: people everywhere!

Of course, Taeyong sits quietly while observing people without interest while Yuta and Hansol converse like lovebirds. He wishes this game can just happen immediately so he doesn’t have to sit there anymore. Luckily, they aren't seated far, so seeing the players’ faces are quite easy.

At that moment, Taeyong’s eyes are locked onto a guy climbing up the stairs in order to find a seat.

Moon Taeil.

He wonders what this guy is doing at this place. The average person who experiences such trauma from yesterday’s events should be staying home (although he should be saying that for himself, but he has his reasons). This guy probably suffered the most yesterday night. It’s crazy just seeing him in public. Right then, Taeil’s eyes lock onto Taeyong who is startled from the eye contact.

“Taeyong?—“ Taeil says his name with a surprised tone, but he is cut off once Taeyong grabs his wrist and pulls him onto the seat in front of him. Taeil looks just as shocked as Taeyong.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Taeyong shouts in the guy’s ear, trying to overcome the combination of voices in this entire room.

“I could ask you the same thing,” Taeil responds, still startled. “My friend is playing today. How about you?” He was definitely not expecting to see Taeyong here, of all places.

“I was dragged here.” Taeyong bumps his head to the right, using his head like a pointer finger. He is pointing to Yuta who just happens to see Taeil’s presence.

“Taeil! You’re here too?” Yuta shouts, trying to talk over the massive voices inside the gymnasium. It is like he is roaring at the top of his lungs. Taeil just nods with a small grin. “What time does the game start?”

“In like 5 minutes,” Hansol answers while looking at his phone for the time.

“Did you know Jaehyun is playing?” Taeyong shouts in Taeil’s ear, and Taeil gives his answer with his widened eyes, not needing to speak verbally. Coincidences keep happening and keep occurring. It is starting to drive everyone insane to the point of not wanting to step out of his or her houses anymore.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Taeil seriously does not want to be involved with the three others anymore. He made it his life’s goal to not see them ever again after high school, but now he is associated with them in so many ways. It is making him sick. As a result, he closes his eyes and sighs in desperation. He never intended to meet Taeyong and he definitely did not want to be at a game that Jaehyun is playing in.

“The game is about to start,” Yuta speaks, slapping Taeyong’s arm just to tell him.

Jaehyun warms up by stretching his legs, arms, and back. He looks like a complete mess because he couldn’t get the correct amount of sleep he should have gotten last night. He has dark circles under his eyes and he doesn’t look like he is thinking straight. Even his teammates ask him if he is alright. He just answers with a “yes” and puts an end to it with the spark of determination in his eyes. Winning is all he has left.

Winning is his only way of satisfaction, happiness, and accomplishment. It makes him feel good, and boy, does he need it now. He wants to win, but so many images have been popping in his mind after last night. He wonders if it is even possible to win at this moment in time. He’s restless.

“Yo, Jaehyun has been drinking tons of energy drinks and coffee. Do you think he is going to be alright? He looks like a mess,” One of his teammates, Kun, talks with the team captain, Chanyeol.  Chanyeol looks over at Jaehyun who is continuously stretching as he looks at the hoop.

“He’ll be fine.”

The game begins, and Jaehyun is constantly dribbling the basketball. He shoots messily, resulting in the basketball bouncing off the hoop. It is weird seeing that happen to Jaehyun; he’s the ace of the team. He missing a shot means something is up.

Kun shoots, and he scores perfectly fine earning the team a 2-pointer. Jaehyun shoots again but is blocked by the opposite team. Annoyance strikes Jaehyun because mistakes like this never happen to him. It is petty and stupid: making mistakes. Jaehyun is the ace. He should be making shots without even trying, but now he is a complete disaster.

All of his teammates are scoring while he scores only a few points. The team is at 25 right now to 30. Jaehyun is hoping for a comeback. The team sees his determination and frustration which is something neither new nor great. Jaehyun’s frustration along with determination often leads to difficulties. He’d go off on his own instead of depending on his teammates which made the team feel hopeless. Jaehyun takes the ball and throws it; it makes it through the hoop.

Now the score for the team is 27.

The lights turn completely off in the gymnasium, looking like it is a power outage.

“Oh my god! What’s going on?” Yuta questions, wondering what is going on. Taeyong and Taeil look around, seeing if something was done to the power. But no, something is strange. The score of Jaehyun’s team is still glowing red. Taeyong and Taeil’s eyes are so enlarged they can fall off.

27. The number of the cabin Johnny was murdered in.

The number is 27. It glows lone and silent, but it spoke to them in such a horrific way. It is the only thing lit up in the room. Jaehyun looks around in confusion, trying to eye his teammates in the darkness who are also confused from the sudden power outage. He cannot see a thing other than the number 27 on the scoreboard. A great shock comes over his body and the hairs on his arms and legs stand up from his fear. His breathing becomes rapid as his heartbeat accelerates to the maximum. The number is speaking to him like it has its own persona.

All he can hear is the confused voices around the gym, but the most vivid sound in the darkness was footsteps. The footsteps approach him steadily. Each footstep he hears, the more flared his nostrils become and the more his blood pressure rises.

His hands are grabbed and flipped up, palm facing up. He jumps a little from the sudden touch and is about to fall on his knees. He feels a round sphere-ish figure being placed onto his palms which makes his stomach twist in all directions. The footsteps begin to leave, each step becoming faint as they walk away from him. The lights are suddenly turned back on without further notice.

Jaehyun’s eyes have yet to adjust to the bright lights, but once they do, he sees an ordinary basketball in his hands.

But there is something on it—something terrible. He lets out a deep scream, dropping the basketball and stepping backwards, away from the damn thing. He falls backwards, pushing himself away from the basketball with his feet. This is insane. It is absolute insanity!

His breath is ripped away from his soul from the message written in black ink on the basketball.

I KNOW ONE OF YOU DID IT TO JOHNNY.

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