it’s a monday when baekhyun doesn’t return home. kyungsoo wakes up at three am after losing a battle to stay awake as he awaits his boyfriend’s safe return. he expects to find baekhyun snoozing on the couch, opting for the uncomfortable piece of furniture over their shared bed to avoid the risk of disturbing kyungsoo from his slumber. baekhyun’s always been considerate like that—or rather—had been.

kyungsoo finds himself alone, however, no boyfriend in sight. returning to the bedroom, he checks his phone; no missed calls, no text messages. his heart starts to race, pounding loudly in his chest, and his mind begins to conjure up the worst case scenarios. what if baekhyun’s been in a terrible accident? should he start ringing the local hospitals? how long would he have to wait before he filed an official missing person’s report with the police?

he paces around the apartment to distract himself from the horrors that plague his mind. feeling the weight of a countless unanswered questions consuming his body, kyungsoo finally sinks into the sofa, eyes glued to the front door and phone clutched tightly in his hand.

a screaming match ensues the moment baekhyun returns home.

“where have you been? why didn’t you call? what the , baekhyun?”

“out. and can this wait till tomorrow? i’m not exactly in the mood to answer twenty one questions, kyungsoo.”

“and whose fault is that? how did you think i felt when i was up all night, worried that you were lying dead in a gutter somewhere?”

“well, no one asked you stay up all night.”

it’s the first time they go to sleep, doors slammed shut and conflicts still unresolved.

but it isn’t the last.






it’s a tuesday when baekhyun staggers home at four in the morning, too drunk to function. kyungsoo—well accustomed to staying up all night at this point—hears baekhyun struggling to open the front door, keys jangling before hitting the ground with a thud. the room falls still and kyungsoo suspects that baekhyun has passed out right outside of their apartment. he almost jumps out of his skin when the silence is interrupted by the loud sound of baekhyun pounding at the door.

“kyungsoo-yah, open up!”

“sssh! be quiet, you’re being too loud! the neighbours will complain,” kyungsoo hisses as he quickly ushers the stumbling drunkard into the hallway.

“ the neighbours!”

“what’s gotten into you, baekhyun?”

“you know what? you can right off, too!”

kyungsoo gasps at the profanity hurled at him. despite the fights they’ve had over the years, baekhyun has never spoken to him in such a manner. at a loss for words, he leaves an empty bucket next to the semi-unconscious baekhyun on the sofa, shoes still on his feet.

kyungsoo wakes up the next morning with swollen, puffy eyes and a damp pillow. baekhyun, too preoccupied with nursing his hangover, doesn’t notice his boyfriend’s dishevelled state.

the events of the previous night go unmentioned.






it’s a wednesday when kyungsoo blows out the flickering wicks of the two melted puddles that will no doubt mark the polished wood of the dining room table. with a heavy sigh, he transfers the now cold food into tupperware boxes and when he closes the fridge door, he pretends he doesn’t see the day’s date circled on the calendar captioned with ‘our five year anniversary’.






it’s a thursday when kyungsoo first notices the unfamiliar scent on baekhyun’s shirt. he wants to ask if his boyfriend found someone else, but the question dies in his throat.

instead, kyungsoo leaves a pillow and blanket on the couch and returns to the bedroom, leaving the door firmly closed. baekhyun takes the hint and sets up camp in the living room without offering any signs of resistance. kyungsoo tosses and turns all night, desperately hoping that baekhyun would sneak back into the room, climbing onto the bed and wrapping his arms around kyungsoo as he whispers a string of sorry’s, i love you’s, and i miss you’s.

kyungsoo spends yet another night alone and baekhyun is already gone by the time he rises in the morning.






it’s a friday when kyungsoo finally confronts his boyfriend with trembling hands balled into fists. “who is he?”

“what are you talking about, kyungsoo? who’s who?”

“the one you’re ing behind my back.”

“what the ? there isn’t anybody else, why would you even think that?!”

“can you blame me, baekhyun?! we haven’t had in months! is it that far fetched to think that you’re getting it somewhere else?”

“don’t give me that, it’s not like i haven’t tried. you’re the one who shrugs me off, kyungsoo, not me.”

“how can i when all i can think about is you with another man. does he kiss you the same way i do? is he a better than i am? does he know i’m here waiting after you two are done ing?”

“kyungsoo, watch what you’re saying.”

“i hate that i think this about you but i can’t stop myself. we don’t talk anymore, how am i supposed to know how you feel? about me, about us. god, i can’t even remember the last time you said i love you.” kyungsoo chokes back a sob but his vision is already blurred by the tears forming in his eyes.

“you know i do.”

“do i?”

it’s kyungsoo who sleeps on the couch this time, if staring at the ceiling counts as sleep, that is.




it’s a saturday when everything changes. kyungsoo’s feeling tired but it has nothing to do with baekhyun or their relationship. he turns his head to the hallway when he hears the front door open.

“alright, let me have it,” baekhyun says with a heavy sigh, bracing himself for another long night. it’s practically a standard routine now—baekhyun returns home at an ungodly hour and they bicker until fatigue takes control of their bodies.

“i’m not going to nag at you for staying out late again.” kyungsoo gestures for baekhyun to take a seat and he takes a deep breath before continuing. “these past few months, all i’ve been doing is sitting around and waiting for you to come home. wondering what you’ve been up to, if you’ve been lying to me.”

“kyungsoo, how many times we’ve been through this?!” baekhyun rubs his face before releasing a loud roar that bounces off the walls.

“just let me finish. today was different. when i heard the key in the lock just now, i actually wished it wasn’t you returning home. i wished you were still gone for a little while longer. can you imagine thinking that about your own boyfriend?” kyungsoo laughs but it’s not one from joy. it’s sad, heartbreakingly so.

“kyungs—”

“i think it’s time we call it, baekhyun-ah,” kyungsoo interrupts and he observes a pained expression on baekhyun’s face that he’s never seen before.

“i know things have been rough lately and we’ve been fighting all the time, but aren’t we going to make up like we always do?”

“not this time, baek.”

“are you really giving up? calling it quits?”

kyungsoo notices baekhyun’s eyes are welling up with tears and his lips are quivering but he doesn’t let it affect his decision. “i don’t see any other way.”

“i don’t want this to end like this. five plus years we’ve been together, soo, and it’s done? just like that?” baekhyun asks, his voice barely recognisable and tears streaming down his face.

“then talk me out of it,” kyungsoo says, fully aware that the words are empty and baekhyun knows it too.

the conversation that they’re having is long overdue and there’s nothing that can be said that could mend their broken relationship, not anymore—it’s too late.

baekhyun opens his mouth before closing it again. five minutes pass before he speaks again. “i’m not cheating on you, kyungsoo. i’ve never cheated on you and i need you to know that. i’ve never even thought about anyone else.”

“i know,” kyungsoo says, looking into his boyfriend’s eyes, and he genuinely means it.

“but it doesn’t matter, does it?”

kyungsoo doesn’t answer; they sit in silence, words between them no longer necessary. the sun is out and the birds are chirping when kyungsoo and baekhyun finally crawl into their shared bed. they fall asleep in each other’s arms for the first time in who knows how long.

it’s also the last time.






it’s a sunday when kyungsoo returns home to his new apartment.

despite living alone, his bed is no longer empty, and neither is his heart.

kyungsoo sleeps peacefully that night.








a/n:
i would offer you guys a tissue but i kinda need them for myself tbh.