“Hey.”

“…”

“I bought some food for you.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

She sat next to me and sprawled out, her left arm and leg on my lap. I squeezed her thigh and kissed her hand. She giggled.

“Sol?”

“Yes?"

I pat my lap. She giggles.

“Sure.”

She snuggled under my arm and placed her head on my chest. I sighed. She the TV and a random variety show plays. We watched in silence, only moving when we ran out of snacks. After she took the bowls to the kitchen and started cooking, I turned off the TV and walked towards her. She hummed to a familiar song while stirring whatever she had in the pot.

“What are you making?”

I grabbed her from behind and gave Sol a back hug, making her gasp and chuckle. We swayed silently.

But it was an empty silence.

He walked out of our room quietly. She was still asleep, the cool air touching her bare skin. She shivered, as he traced the line of her back. Then he covered her body quietly and changed before going outside, driving away. Not aware that she was still wide awake. Watching him leave. Crying.

“Who’s that?”

“Who’s what?”

She leaned over me curiously, peering into my phone. I push her out of the way and get off the bed.

“It’s nobody.”

“Good. Let’s continue.”

She leans towards my face, panting slightly. The moon shone on her wane face.

I sigh.

“I need to go.”

“Stay. You haven’t completed your full time yet.”

She clasped my hand weakly , but I push her aside.

“No, I need to leave.”

I buttoned my shirt back up and grabbed my wallet and phone. Then, I took a few bills out of my pocket and left it on the bedside.

“It was fun while it lasted. I guess.”

I winked and walked out of the room – leaving her there, covered in the white sheets. A smile gleamed in the darkness as she gripped the money earnestly.

I put my phone on the desktop and rolled onto my bed. I hear her wake. For about fifteen minutes she lied there, as still as a mouse. I stayed still too, waiting to see what she would do. Then, she finally got up, carefully to not wake me from my supposed slumber, and tiptoed towards my phone. I try to keep my breathing still as she scrolls through my text messages.

Then I hear a small, quiet sob. Followed by several more. Tears dropped onto the sheets over me, cold and wet.

I shivered under the blankets.

Quickly, she gets back into the bed and lies there once again, this time facing me. I keep pretending I’m asleep and wait for her to wake me up and start ridiculing me. But she only my cheek and kisses me before rolling over and snuggling under the blankets.

I sigh.

“Let’s break up.”

“Why?”

I knew the reason why.

“I’m tired of our relationship.”

Lies.

“Oh…”

“We don’t have the same old spark we used to have either.”

“…”

“I’m sorry.”

She wraps me in her embrace and kisses my cheek and lips once more before walking away, her guitar clunking noisily. I put my face into my hands and shake my head. The sun beat down on me, making my black hoodie heat up. I take it off and with only an undershirt, walk back home.

It is quiet and still. No laughter, no smiles, no love. It radiates loneliness – and she’s only been gone for thirty minutes. Sighing again, I plop onto the couch and turn on the TV. As the new announcer droned about the latest celebrity gossip, I thought about Sol. Our meeting in school, our blossoming friendships that turned into love once we had started to date. How cliché was that? But I scanned through our memories together, hoping for something special; our first date, first kiss, the first time we decided to give one another something irreplaceable.

Nothing.

Nothing stood out anymore.

Nothing changed.

It was still empty.

“Hey! Jungkook! Hey!”

I look outside and frown. Why are they here?

“Let’s go out! Have fun! Sol isn’t here right?”

I opened the door to let Taehyung and Hoseok, my two best friends, in.

“We broke up a few hours ago.”

They stopped.

“Wow, that was sudden.”

“Yup.”

They sat on the couch next to me, the mood becoming sullen.

“Um… Do you want to… Talk about it?” Hoseok asked. I threw a pillow at him.

“What are we? Girls? No! Let’s go out!”

I pumped my fist, but their faces told me that they weren't convinced.

“Hey man… I think we should just stay in today. I don’t think we should go out.”

“Why not?”

“Well… You just kind of ruined the mood and we’re supposed to be your best friends. We can’t just leave you like this… In an emotional wreck.”

“I haven’t even cried yet.”

“That’s the thing though,” Taehyung continued. “We’ve known each other ever since we were in high school so out of the little relationships we’ve known you had, somehow you always end up crying and then doing something really stupid that hurts someone else, so we’re going to try to not let that happen.”

Hoseok nodded vigorously, backing up Taehyung’s little hypothesis. I shook my head and sat back down.

“Why did you break up with her anyways?”

“I cheated on her.”

“Oh.”

“Why did you do that?”

I stayed silent for that. Why did I do that?

“I don’t know.”

“You’re really stupid.”

“I know.”

Hoseok pats me on the back before following Taehyung out the door. The door closes with a thud and I am alone again.

I wonder how she is? Has she eaten? Has she slept? Has she forgotten me? I know I haven’t.

I sit on a bench next to her apartment. It is around ten at night, but I know she won’t be home until around eleven. For some reason, that habit stayed with me. I know that I was being very creepy, but I just couldn’t help it. Old habits don’t die very quickly for me.

Laughter. I heard her laughter. Quickly, I hid behind a tree, where she wouldn’t see me. Sol was with a man. Another man. That’s not me. Of course it would never be me. What was I saying?

They went up until she reached the floor of her apartment. She chuckled as he waved to her and went back down the stairs. I sat outside still waiting. The man came out and whistled a song as he slowly strolled towards the main street. After he left, I kept sitting there, almost as if I was waiting.

Thirty minutes later, he was back, but this time he was running. He sprinted up the stairs and reached her door once more. I watched her embrace him, shoulder shaking and heaving. I ruffled my hair and left.

I lit my cigarette and put inhaled. I was back at my house, on the balcony. It had been such a long time since I last smoked. She had helped me snap out of it, but as I had said before, old habits don’t die very quickly.

“Jungkook!”

I looked down to see her waving at me. Why was she here?

“Hey! Don’t you know that smoking is bad for you?”

I nod and took another puff.

“Come down!”

I shrug, but decide to surprise her by going down. I drag my feet towards the stairs and reach the first floor before swinging open the door. She is still looking up, wondering where I went.

“What.”

She shrieked and I find it hard to keep a smile down.

“O-oh, you actually came down.”

“Yup.”

“…”

“…”

“How are you?”

God, I hate small talk.

“I’m fine.”

Suddenly, she snatches my cigarette and takes a puff. Surprised, I stand there. She calmly breathes out; the smoke is scattered in the wind. I frown and take back my own cigarette. I toss it onto the ground and stomp on the stick before throwing it far away.

“I though you said that cigarettes are bad for you.”

“Not if it isn’t a habit.”

“…”

“…”

“Why are you here?”

“I heard that you broke up with your girlfriend.”

How did she know?

“Who told you that?”

She kicked at a pebble listlessly.

“I have my connections.”

I groaned and ran my hands through my hair. She giggled at my discomfort.

“Come on! Cheer up! How long could you have been dating the girl if you had hooked up with me? A week? Two weeks? A month at tops?”

She grinned a lopsided grin. I hesitated, wondering whether or not to tell her. But if I did, maybe she would go away.

“Five years.”

“Five years?! Holy shi-”

She clamped her hand over . I smirked at her reaction.

“Aren’t I just cunning? Now, if that’s all, I think I’ll leave. Adieu.”

I saluted to her in an arrogant manner and turned around and started to walk back to my house. I felt her grab my hand.

“Wait.”

I groaned in annoyance and turned back around to see a trembling girl.

“I-I’m sorry.”

My eyes soften.

“Don’t worry. We had slowly drifted apart anyways.”

I kiss her hand.

“Maybe I’ll see you later Dal.”

I let go of her hand and tried to pretend that I hadn’t just lied to myself.

I had been a month since we had broken up. I still haven’t gotten over her. Is that wrong? I hoped not. I walked out of my house and started to stroll towards the main street. It was quiet, still quite early in the morning. Foggy and thick.

I entered the restaurant and sat down at my usual spot with her. A waitress handed me a menu, but I waved it away. I’ve been here too many times to not know what I was going to order.

“Hello Mr. Jeon, It’s nice to see you today.”’

The owner of this restaurant came over to greet me. I smiled at her.

“You too Mrs. Kim. I will have the usual.”

She nodded, but started to look around me confused.

“Where is your girlfriend?”

I stared at him and gave her a sad smile.

“Fate didn’t want us together.”

She clicked her tongue and nodded, adding that she was sorry. Then she left and I sat there, alone. I felt so lonely. I wish that I hadn’t cheated on her. Why did I do that? What had impelled me to do that? Maybe it was the fac-

“You’re food is ready. Please enjoy.”

I nod in thanks and pick up my chopsticks to eat when I hear a clang. People murmur and I turn to see what the commotion is about just to freeze. She’s here. Sol’s here. Why was she here?

Plus. She was with him.

Great, my life just got a whole lot better.

I stare at her. She stares back. The universe fades. Then it comes back. She murmurs something to her new friend and runs towards the bathroom. I don’t try to follow her.

“Hey, how are you?”

What’s the deal with this guy?

“Nothing much. Just broke up with the girl that you were with.”

“Oh. Are you going to try to follow her?”

“No.”

“Okay then.”

He sits in front of me. I frown.

“What’s your deal with her?”

He chuckles softly. I groan inwardly. Does he like her?

“Oh, just comforting her because of something you probably did.”

I shake my head and smirk.

“I can tell that you like her. Or are you dating?”

His smile falters for a second before coming back even brighter than before.

“So what? Why do you care so much? It doesn’t matter for you anymore. At least I’m there for her. You’re not part of her life anymore. You said it yourself. She wasn’t your fate. Just go.”

I scoff.

“Mrs. Kim! Wrap this up for me; I’m going to eat it at home. I lost my appetite.”

He smirks and I shake my head. I feel so frustrated and locked up. Was he dating her? Or did he just start to like her? I don’t know!

I let out a sigh.

“Just… Take care of her for me okay? Don’t hurt her the way I did.”

He frowned.

“Why do you care?”

“You’ll find out eventually. Besides that… Make Sol eat, okay? When she doesn’t she gets really cranky.”

He nods and I give him a weary smile before paying for the bill. The last thing I see is him smiling at her while she ate.

I sigh.

I need to get rid of the habit of walking around in the dark, alone.

Kicking at the rubble, I dragged my feet around the park, both hands in my pocket. It was a quiet night, everything silent – besides a few crickets at the most. I felt myself getting drowsy as the night grew longer, struggling to stay awake. Once it was midnight, I finally decided to go home. Before I did though, I decided to stop at a local convenient store for some instant food so that I could stay home for the next few days, just to lay low.

The doorbell tinkled when I walked in and the employee behind the desk nodded to me. I returned the same gesture and walked towards the instant food isle when I saw her. She turned around and saw me too. Her eyes widened. I raised my eyebrow. She was blocking the isle.

“O-oh, sorry didn’t see you there.”

She quickly got out of my way and quickly walked towards the register. I picked out a few snacks and also reached the register. I waited quietly, hearing the steady beep of the scanner on food.

“That will be twenty-two dollars and forty-nine cents ma’am.”

I watched Dal frantically check her pockets, clearly not having enough money. I sighed in frustration.

“Here.”

Her eyes widened.

“No, it’s fine. I have money.”

“No you don’t. Take it or leave.”

She is hesitant, but eventually snatches the few bills and pays the cashier before walking out. Shaking my head, I pay for my own food and also go outside to leave. There I see her stand, waiting for me.

“Here’s the change. Thanks.”

She turns around and practically runs away from me. I let a breath of air.

Maybe…

Maybe I should ask her to hang out.

Wait, what?! What was thinking?

I shook that thought out of my head and started walking away.

Towards the direction she went.

Crud.

Do I even have her number?

I check my phone.

I don’t.

What. The. Heck. Am. I. Doing.

I keep walking.

“Jungkook? What are you doing here?”

I turn around to see her munching on a bag of chips.

“Where did you come from?” I blurted out. Wow. That was smart.

“Heaven. Where everyone comes from, but doesn’t always go back to.”

She snorts and I frown.

“Was that a joke?”

“No.”

“Then why were you laughing?”

“Why do you refer to snorting as laughing?”

I shake my head, no snappish reply coming from my mouth.

“Where do you actually live?”

She pointed at the rundown building behind her.

“Right here.”

I stay silent.

She looks at me.

“What? Is there something wrong?”

“No, no…”

She frowns.

“Yes there is.”

I shake my head.

“There really isn’t. I just… Didn’t what I was supposed to expect.”

“Expect? Expect that the place that I live in is crap place full of ty people? Or what?”

She sneers and turns away from me. I grab her shoulder and turn her around.

“Wait.”

She throws my hand off her shoulder.

“God, I don’t want your pity party. I don’t care what you think. Just… Just leave me alone and don’t appear in front of me again!”

Her words come out as her eyes smart with tears.

Darn it.

I only wanted to hang out with her.

Sighing, I decide to take chances again and reach out to give her a hug. I feel her freeze up as soon as my arms are wrapped around her. I put my chin on top of her head and look up.

“You don’t have to keep stuff to yourself.”

That’s when she starts to cry.