Chapter 31.

Mark felt better the next day and Jaemin insisted that he could walk - he wasn’t stabbed in the leg now was he?

Mark enjoyed the addition of Jaemin to the group. The other made a lot of jokes all the time and Mark was sure he was pretty intelligent. They had packed their bags and were heading towards the 1^st Clan. Renjun seemed a little anxious that morning, so Mark wasn’t surprised when the other walked by his side in the back as they started moving.

  “Doyoung talked to me about his dreams.” He spoke in a low voice. Jaehyun was walking ahead of them and Mark looked up while slowing down in his steps. Renjun did too until they were out of ear-reach. “I’m not going to comment on you and Haechan.” He said first, eyes on the group that was walking away from them. He seemed to trust that they’d catch up with them, Mark knew these woods and they wouldn’t get lost. Mark tried to rub away the heat creeping up his neck. “I had to stop Ten from going down the bridge. He didn’t know why. Thank me later.” Renjun added the last part when Mark opened his mouth to speak. Renjun spoke nonchalantly as if talking about these things didn’t affect him. Mark was sure he did that so he didn’t make Mark more embarrassed than he already was. “Now, Doyoung’s predictions seem to fit with some things I’ve seen in my dreams.”

Mark started limping his way down the bridge and Renjun followed him. “What parts?”

  “Well, I remember Haechan being angry. Very angry. I see Johnny throw his dagger and Ten grip onto his jacket but he’s pushed away.”

Mark tried not to succumb to the anger rising within him. “Why would Johnny hurt him?”

  “That’s what I saw, it stops there.” Renjun glanced at Mark. “It must be because of Jaehyun passing away,” – Renjun noticed Mark’s clenched fists. – “Or something similar. What if he wakes up like I did?”

Mark felt reassured. They’d all been so hopeless when Renjun passed. It had been a terrible time, but he was alive and walking with Mark. Suddenly Mark felt really grateful to walk with Renjun. “You’re right.” He admitted and ran a hand through his hair. “I’d rather he become Damned than dead.”
Renjun nodded. “It may be a curse, but we’re alive.”

Mark nodded and looked at Renjun who was ruffling his dark brown hair up. Yuta had cut it so Renjun’s bangs didn’t fall into his eyes. “We’re alive.” He repeated and the two of picked up speed.

They had to rest again before they’d get out of the 7^th Clan, and Mark thought he could talk with Haechan, when he noticed Jaehyun talking with the other. Mark felt as if his throat closed and suddenly, he decided he’d rather not. He ended up walking off alone, because somehow he felt guilt gnaw at his insides and he couldn’t understand the feeling. He heard a heartbeat near him and waited for Ten to catch up with him.

  “It’s dark and you’re not fully healed. Why are you walking off alone in the night?” The other asked as he caught up with Mark. The younger looked at Ten for a moment, his blue eyes glowing and he then walked past Ten to crawl up into a tree. Ten followed him after sighing deeply. “Mark.” He called as Mark reached the top where they could see the night sky and the little light the sun threw upon the sky in the west. Ten took seat on the branch beside Mark. Both of them inhaled deeply when the breeze blew past them. “You and Haechan.”

Mark gripped the branch tightly. “What about us?” He asked in a strained voice and he noticed out of the corner of his eye, how a smile took over Ten’s features.

  “You have something going on!” Ten said in triumph and Mark grimaced.

  “No!”

  “Yes!” Ten squealed and Mark leaned away from Ten’s grabbing hands.

  “Kun betrayed us and Taeyong did too, can we not-”

Ten’s smile immediately vanished. “Stop. You like him.” Ten stated but it sounded like a question so Mark answered with a nod. Ten hummed. “He likes you. Obviously.” Mark had to stifle a groan. Ten patted the back of Mark’s head. “Why are you acting like it’s such a bad thing?”

  “Because it’s scary.” Mark admitted and glanced at Ten. The other’s eyes twinkled as if the stars were collected in them, and not scattered on the sky above them. “Ever since… ever since I started feeling like this all my other emotions are stronger too. I get so angry and suddenly sad and then when I’m happy I cry?” Ten chuckled at the way Mark said the last part.

  “When did you cry out of happiness?” He pried.

Mark knew he shouldn’t tell Ten because the other would bother him, but Ten deserved to smile like he did at the moment. He deserved it so much. “We kissed.”

Ten squealed. “YOU DID WHAT?!” He asked in disbelief, a stupid smile on his face. “Oh, my little Mark! How you’ve grown!” He cooed and Mark looked grumpy, but once again those butterflies danced around in his stomach. Ten copied the way Mark sat, elbow propped on his thigh and chin in his palm. “Was it good?”

Mark gave Ten a look. “I practically smashed my face against his. I’m such a failure.” Mark cried out and Ten laughed again.

  “Cute.” He said with a giggle. Mark chuckled. “You deserve it.” Ten then added and Mark shook his head. Ten nodded exaggeratedly. “You do.” He added. “If Haechan is like Johnny, it’s amazing you managed to make him discard his soldier demeanor.” Ten said and Mark noticed the smile slipping off Ten’s face. Mark turned his body towards Ten.

  “What did Johnny say? That time you spoke about?”

Ten glanced at him but he was looking straight forward. “Well… It was while you were gone.

  “I just wish there was someone in the world that I could count on. That would be by my side and that I could trust.” Ten said dreamily. Johnny was lying on his back. Ten was lying right beside him, for the first time both of them alone in the cave. Yet Ten had never felt so distant from Johnny. It was as if the other purposely separated them. Ten dared to eye Johnny. “I trust you.” He confessed and Johnny turned his head slightly, eyes meeting Ten’s. There wasn’t happiness in those eyes, only sadness.

  “I can’t be by your side, Ten. I’ve got a place to be and it’s with someone else.” Johnny said without looking away from Ten as if Johnny wanted himself to see Ten’s hopes shatter. Ten looked away and up at the ceiling. His lips turned into a thin line and it seemed as if his eyes looked everywhere else than at Johnny. There were some unfinished words in the air. Johnny kept looking at Ten because he wanted to continue talking, but he didn’t want to confuse the other. So the words were left unspoken, only for the stars to hear, and the stars keep their secrets.

  “I’ve got a place to be and it’s with someone else.” Ten repeated. “I thought he was in love with Jaehyun or something.”

Mark didn’t like the sound of that. “He’s not!” He said a little too soon and then sealed his lips shut. Ten startled at the way Mark had raised his voice. Mark chuckled and patted Ten’s leg to change the subject. “Johnny really is different now that we know his true identity.”

Ten nodded. “You’re right. He was so nice before and now he’s so stoic.” Ten imitated Johnny’s serious expression and squared up his shoulders to seem bigger. Mark laughed.

  “But the way he fights.” Mark added and Ten released a low groan and Mark eyed his brother.

  “Sorry, but it’s kind of hot.” Ten admitted and Mark spluttered and Ten couldn’t hold in his laughter as Mark choked on his own saliva.

  “Don’t say that again.” Mark pleaded.

  “Fine. I promise.” Ten smiled and Mark did too. Ten leaned closer and rested his head on Mark’s shoulder. Mark leaned into the other’s touch too and the two enjoyed that they felt at home.

Mark noticed Jaemin had chosen to sleep beside Jeno who was sharing a blanket with Renjun. Jisung was taking the first watch and he gave the two a smile when they arrived. “We’re leaving tomorrow.” He said with a pout and Mark nodded sadly.

  “We will return.” He promised Jisung and the younger’s eyes lit up. He nodded, looking as if he believed Mark, and Mark realized he now had to keep his promise.

Ten found his spot between Yuta and Johnny and Mark realized his was between Jaehyun and Haechan. Mark went on his knees, wincing and in the back of his head wishing he would be done healing by tomorrow. He was moving his blanket aside, eyeing Jaehyun who was lying on his back and Haechan who had his back turned to Mark. Mark sat frozen in the spot for a moment, but then he crawled beneath the blanket. The air around them was cold. Mark used his backpack as his pillow. He lied on his back, watching the leaves dance in the soft breeze. Jisung was sitting in a tree, lit up by the fire in the middle of their camp. Mark let his hand down to feel the wood beneath him. Lots of tourists often were scared by the fact that only a wooden floor separated them from such a fall. Mark though was used to the feeling and enjoyed being above ground. He wasn’t scared of falling.

Haechan turned around, releasing a small sound like a groan or whine and he was now facing Mark. Mark could feel the other’s breath on his cheek and smell his breath. Mark turned his head to look at the other. He felt so at ease with Haechan, that he didn’t feel scared. From what he had heard about love stories or the teenagers babbling in his village about heartbreak, Mark just couldn’t put those stories on Haechan. He trusted the other to know what Mark felt and there was respect. Mark wouldn’t trade that feeling with any of the passionate love-stories. Mark wanted to barf just at the thought of those.

Mark re-adjusted his position having one arm behind his head. Ten loved those stories. He wanted passion and drama. Which was what he got. Mark had hoped it would have turned out a little more different.

  “Mark.” Haechan spoke and Mark turned to look at Haechan who had opened his eyes. “Sleep.” Haechan commanded and Mark smiled.

  “Can’t.” He replied and noticed a smile tug at the corner of Haechan’s lips. Their faces were close. A sudden thought appeared in Mark’s head and Mark his lips. He removed his hand from beneath his head to scratch his nose. Haechan’s breathing was slow, he was close to falling back asleep. Mark eyed Jisung who was still looking up at the sky. Then he scooted closer and tilted his head to have better access. It was a softer kiss this time. Just a peck.
Mark lied his head back down on his bag and noticed that Haechan was now smiling. Eyes still closed. “Sneaky.” Haechan muttered. “Attacking when I’m half-asleep.”

Mark chuckled, earning Jisung’s attention and Mark turned quiet. Instead he used his left hand that was still in bindings to find Haechan’s and Haechan’s fingers laced with his. It was a loose hold but it was powerful. Mark knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep, because he was just so happy.

Haechan had fallen asleep and Mark had given up on trying. He lied awake and listened to the heartbeats around him when he noticed Jaehyun’s odd one amongst them all. Mark startled when Haechan turned around in his sleep, letting go of Mark’s hand. It left Mark able to turn around and face Jaehyun. Mark let his left hand run over Jaehyun’s chest and he felt Jaehyun’s heartbeat. It was doing that thing it often did when Jaehyun slept. Soon Jaehyun would wake up feeling light-headed and out of breath. This time it was just different. Jaehyun’s heart seemed weaker and every beat was harder than the other, as if it was losing strength. Mark took himself in sitting up and he ignored Jisung watching him as he swung a leg over Jaehyun’s body. He straddled the other and put his hands together. He wouldn’t hit hard like he did with Taeyong. He put his left palm on top of his right and found the right spot. Jaehyun’s body started to stir and Mark listened to Johnny’s heart which were close. He then pushed down on Jaehyun’s chest. Hoping he wouldn’t wake up the others. It took quite few steady pumps before Jaehyun woke up and Mark looked into Jaehyun’s wild eyes as he felt the commander grip onto his arms. Mark just continued until he was sure Jaehyun’s heart stopped curling over the beats. Tears were in Jaehyun’s eyes. Soft cries left his lips by every press. Jaehyun clutched onto Mark’s hands that was on his chest. Mark stopped and listened.

  “.” Jaehyun cursed in pain and Mark caressed the spot. He looked into Jaehyun’s wet eyes.

  “Your heart.”

Jaehyun nodded, eyes squeezed shut. Tears rolled down the sides of his face and into his hair. “I know.” He muttered and Mark swung his leg back and got beneath his blanket again. Jisung was used to this by now and went back to looking up at the sky. Jaehyun winced.

  “I’m sorry.” Mark spoke softly and it seemed as if it had deeper meaning. Jaehyun grew quiet. Both of them did. Mark closed his eyes and when Jaehyun finally fell back to sleep, Mark let himself to the same.

A/N:

Call me when Johnny and Winwin get the lines they deserve.

And where the was Kun?

Love,
Emma <3