It all happens so quickly.

Byulyi walks up to their apartment, unlocks and opens the door. She opens to call out for Yongsun but she sees something that instantly mutes her voice.

There is an extra pair of shoes, not Byulyi’s, haphazardly thrown next to Yongsun’s high heels.

Byulyi bolts in, heart thudding unbelievably loud, blood rushing to her ears as she stops in front of their bedroom. The door is closed.

She hears noises.

Byulyi recognises Yongsun’s breathy moans.

She feels something threatening to break inside her, holds onto the slight glimmer of hope that it’s not what she thinks it is. It’s not. It can’t be.

She hears another moan.

It’s not Yongsun’s.

Byulyi opens the door.

Her mind goes blank. Bitter bile rises to ; she feels like throwing up.

She sees Yongsun freeze in the throes of passion. Byulyi feels numb as she watches her girlfriend scramble away from the man above her and off the bed with shaky legs, stumbling over clothes strewn about, the way she mouths out a strangled ‘byulyi’ but no sound comes out.

So she runs away to the sound of her heart breaking, to the music of her bare feet thudding against concrete and Yongsun calling out for her.

She stands outside Hyejin’s house an hour later, soaked from the rain and feet aching, blisters forming.

Hyejin takes her in without a word, brings Byulyi into her home with open arms and warmth that helps to numb the pain, even a little. She tends to Byulyi’s wounds with the gentleness of a mother. Hyejin understands.

(Her heart hurts worse, but there isn’t any medicine to soothe that kind of pain so she keeps quiet, lets it fester in its wounds.)

Byulyi wakes up the next morning to 34 missed calls on her phone and more than a hundred unread messages.

All from Kim Yongsun.

[2:26 AM] Byul, I can explain, but I need you to come back. Where are you now? I’ll pick you up.

[2:45 AM] Byulyi please it’s raining

[3:01 AM] Where are you? Its 3am im worried for you please come back im sorry

[3: 33 AM] Are you hurt? Are you okay byul

[3:34 AM] At least text something back so I know that you’re alright

[4:40 AM] Byulyi I love you

[5:00 AM] I’m sorry please it was a mistake

[5:00 AM] I love you please come back

[5:02 AM] Don’t leave me.

Byulyi painstakingly reads through every single one of them. The messages get more frantic, more desperate as she scrolls through.

[7:18 AM] Byulyi, I know you’re upset and you have every right to be. I am so very sorry for what I’ve done to you. I understand that you need your space. I just want to let you know that I’ll always be here waiting for you to come home. I love you and I’ll do anything to make this right again. I’m sorry.

In all honesty, Byulyi wants to just go home and forget everything, like it was all just a nightmare,

‘Waiting for you to come home’

But now Byulyi’s not exactly sure where home is anymore.

Byulyi sits and waits as Hyejin prepares breakfast, nursing a mug of something (even my taste buds cant feel anything anymore, Hyejin, she murmurs bitterly) when Wheein barges in, panting and heaving.

She rushes past Hyejin and pulls Byulyi into her embrace, clutches her tight and doesn’t let go. Wheein tells her that everything is going to be all right.

Byulyi convinces herself to believe her. Hyejin joins their embrace.

They’re curled up on the sofa, Hyejin resting her head on Byulyi’s shoulder, mouth almost pressing against her neck and Wheein tucked underneath an arm, legs entangled with hers. Byulyi feels so protected and safe, feels something akin to fondness bubbling up when Wheein’s stomach growls and Hyejin pulls her closer.

“It’s my fault, I guess,” she says one day, as she watches Hyejin work her magic in the kitchen. Hyejin whips her head to look at her and Byulyi is taken aback by the fury in her eyes.

“Don’t you ever say that again,”

Hyejin grips her face, brings their faces close until their foreheads bump.

“I never want to hear those words again.” Byulyi closes her eyes, nods, and breathes out a quiet ‘okay’.

“-for the last time, what are you doing here?”

“…”

“No. I wont let you hurt her again.”

“…!”

“…Leave. Now.”

Byulyi wakes up to heated whispers at the front door. The door slams and she scrambles up and out their bedroom and sees Hyejin with her face in her hands, back against the front door. She has a sinking feeling about whom Hyejin was talking to and her suspicions are only cemented when the younger girl grips her hand and rests her head on her shoulder.

Her voice is weary.

“I will never let her hurt you again, unnie.”

Byulyi just nods and lets Hyejin play with her fingers.

*takes a deep breath*

pls dont hurt me