[title song: ka-ching! - exo cbx]
4k~

CHAPTER 7

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Flopson exclaims, with almost exaggerated vigor that has her rolling her eyes, even as he steps forward. Axe Man eyes him with a funny look, even as Jackson juts out his chin and gives his gang a hard look, his eyes dark. For a moment, maybe due to absolute hysteria caused by building panic, she thinks he looks kinda cool.

But then Axe Man laughs, the sound boisterous and loud, and turns to his biker gang fans as he jabs a thumb back at Jackson, as if to say get a load of this loser. The rest of them cackle and the sound echoes up and down the empty street.

“You think I don’t remember you, Jackson Wang?” Axe Man asks. And shivers run down her spine at the dark look that clouds Axe Man’s sleazy eyes. She blinks, rapidly, her heart beating in her chest, when Axe Man turns his gaze on her, “I certainly remember her.”

“Let us go.” Jackson’s voice is low, deep, and she’ll admit that if he ever spoke to her in that tone, she’d do whatever he was commanding. Jackson takes a step towards him just as Axe Man takes two more steps towards Jackson and her, until he’s just an arm’s length away.

And then Axe Man slowly, deliberately, pushes his leather jacket back just enough to reveal the glinting end of a gun, something she’s only seen in movies. Yoojin immediately squeaks out something incomprehensible, her blood running cold as she grabs at the back of Jackson Wang’s shirt, Enemy Number One be damned now he’ll be Shield Number One. Jackson Wang immediately yelps at her sudden grab and takes several steps back, making her stumble as she scurries back with him. He grabs at her arm as if he’s trying to use her as a shield, too, and she manages to throw him a disparaging glare, because not only is his cool guy image completely gone, but also what the hell, she will not be used as a human shield by him.

“Hey!” She hisses at Jackson Wang, smacking his back, her eyes pinned on the way Axe Man laughs loudly at them, mouth hanging open while his biker gang friends laugh along with him, gesturing at them with mocking amusement. Her eyes instantly zero in on how one of them is twirling a baseball bat. Where’d he even get that from? She figures he’d dug it up from within the depths of his pockets because men’s pockets are deeper than even mom purses. “What are you doing? You’re the guy, aren’t you supposed to protect us or something?”

(Don’t get her wrong, Yoojin’s one hundred percent against gender roles and stereotypes but she’s also keen on surviving and if Flopson has to go down first, then so be it.)

Jackson manages to give her a withering look, despite not really glancing back at her, as if he’s afraid that taking his eyes off the biker gang will have them killed instantly. Which may be true and she’s glad he’s taking precautions.

“Don’t get me wrong, I am one hundred percent the coolest, strongest man you’ll ever meet. But, Burger Girl,” He wildly gestures at Axe Man, who’s lips are moving as if he’s making a speech or something that Yoojin ignores completely in lieu of eyeing Flopson’s frantic hand movements, “He has a gun.”

She rolls his eyes. He seems to take offense at her gesture.

He straightens his arm and sticks his pointer finger and thumb out, waving them around wildly, as if to imitate a gun. She stares at him while he does it. “A gun.” He repeats in a loud whisper, like she hadn’t heard him the first time or seen the damn thing herself.

She watches from the corner of her eye as Axe Man raises both arms in a grand gesture, gun out and glinting against the sun. Axe Man seems to be shouting at the sky. She matches Flopson’s whispered tone, “I can see that.”

“Whatever.” He huffs. “Just say your prayers now.” He mutters, with utter resignation. She clutches at his shirt.

“This is not how I want to die.” She whispers in annoyance.

“Well,” He whispers back, “That . You can take it up with God in a few minutes.”

She glares at him.

“Hey!” Axe Man screams at them, cutting off her annoyed response and making her jump, latching on to Jackson Wang even more than before. The gun hangs from his fingers, pointed in their direction. “Are you guys even paying attention to me? What are you whispering about?”

She vaguely wonders if he’s ever had training with the thing because who the hell waves around a loaded gun like that.

She blinks, because Axe Man is staring at them, waiting for them to respond. She eyes the end of the barrel and mumbles, “Of course we were listening to you.”

“Oh, really?” He asks, raising a brow. “Then what’d I say?”

"Jackson can answer that." She smacks Jackson’s back. “Right, Jackson?”

Jackson barely conceals his yelp, hissing through his teeth as he mutters, “I don’t know what he said.”

“Then what are you good for?” She hisses back, glaring at him, only to have her glare returned with just as much intensity.

“I’m waiting!” Axe Man steps closer and closer and her hands shake so hard she has to dig her fingers into the top of Jackson Wang’s shoulders just to keep herself steady.

Axe Man keeps stepping forward, until he’s right in front of them, and she notices the way Jackson angles himself in front of her (though maybe that’s because she’s practically using him as a human shield). She watches, in horror, as Axe Man brings up the gun, until it’s pressed to Jackson Wang’s chest.

All she can think, right then and there, is that they’re really going to die. She’s going to die before getting a chance to prove her father wrong. She’s going to die with a viral video of her dancing in a burger suit as the only thing to remember her by (and knowing Baekhyun, they’re going to play it at her funeral for fun). She’s going to die. Oh, my god, she’s really going to die.

“I wouldn’t have to do this if you had just listened to me.” Axe Man tells them, his gun on Jackson while his eyes are pinned on her. She blinks, because he looks at her like he knows her somehow and it’s incredibly disconcerting.

“Dude.” Jackson mumbles, his hands up and his eyes wary, “Just put down the gun.”

“I mean,” Axe Man ignores Jackson, throwing his hands up, gun moving up. Jackson breathes out a sigh of relief, but then Axe Man starts waving it right in their faces as he speaks, clearly annoyed. “I can’t believe you didn’t even remember me! Even this remembered me.” He jabs his gun at Jackson Wang’s face and it misses his nose by a few centimeters.

Jackson glares, his head gearing back, neck clearly strained. “Hey! I am not an !”

“Yeah, you are. And a coward, too. I mean, now that I have a gun you’re too scared to threaten me, huh, ?”

Jackson glares, “I’m not stupid. That’s a ing gun, dude.”

“I know, .”

“Stop calling me .”

“No way, .”

“Okay.” Yoojin steps in before Jackson can reply, frowning at Axe Man over Jackson’s shoulder, her tone sarcastic as she eyes Axe Man, because she sure as hell has never seen him before that time at McDonald’s, yet here he is, accusing her of not remembering him. “Not that watching you two argue would be wildly entertaining, but I have one question: why the hell am I supposed to recognize you?”

“Don’t you remember Halloween night?”

She blinks, confused.

“She was wasted, man. Stop being a creep.” Jackson speaks up then, rolling his eyes, “And please just put the freaking gun down.”

“You said you’d listen to my mixtape and everything!”

“On…on Halloween?” Yoojin stumbles over her words, dread coursing through her veins for a moment.

She remembers Halloween, or at least remembers not remembering it. All she really remembers is drinking two cups of jungle juice and then everything just kind of out after that until she woke up the next morning in an ill-fitting Captain America costume in a different city’s park, a homeless guy trying to pry her purse out of her hands. It’s terrifying, the fact that she had lost hours of her memories, that she could have done something she can never take back and she’d never know unless someone else told her. She remembers swearing off jungle juice after that, too.

“Dude, she was totally wasted. Leave it alone.” Jackson mutters, slight irritation coloring his tone.

Axe Man frowns, waving the gun as he turns to look at her, “We were talking for so long and we were connecting so much. You said you were having fun and—”

“Oh, God, please stop.” Yoojin interrupts him, her skin crawling because clearly she did do something regretful, literally. Just the thought of apparently hooking up with this purple haired, Axe-wearing, biker gang member with an apparent tendency to wave a gun in innocent people’s faces makes her stomach churn; in fact, she hates the fact that he knows exactly what happened to her and she doesn’t even remember him. It makes her fingers clench at Jackson’s shoulders, digging into his shirt by accident.

(She thinks maybe she shouldn’t have deleted all those foreboding chain emails promising twenty five years of bad luck and misfortune if she didn’t forward the email to ten people in the next ten minutes back when she was thirteen because clearly those were real. What else would explain the string of bad experiences she’s been through since she was thirteen? Why else would she just so happen to hook up with a goddamn purple haired, Axe-wearing-possibly-Axe-wielding, biker gang member who’d eventually be the one murdering her in the bad part of town?)

“But—”

“Don’t worry, Yoojin.” Jackson speaks over him, cutting him off completely. Though his eyes are pinned on the gun in Axe Man’s hand still, his head is turned slightly sideways, towards her. His eyes skitter sideways, too, and there’s a small, genuine, almost comforting smile tugging at the corner of his lip. She freezes, in surprise, when he reaches back with one hand and brushes at her elbow with the back of his hand. The gesture is painstakingly gentle, comforting, and she doesn’t know what to do with it. “You seemed really drunk and he seemed like a creep so I got you out of there before anything happened.”

The relief is palpable in the atmosphere, her grip on his shoulders relaxing instantly. She barely registers Axe Man’s hey I’m not a creep! A wave of gratitude hits her like the ocean itself, but she tries not to let it show because it’s Flopson, for God’s sake.

She doesn’t know what to say to him, just hangs open and she’s sure she looks embarrassingly ridiculous.

But then she blinks, fully registering the meaning of his words, “We met before the Burger dance-off thing?”

Jackson shrugs, “Yeah.”

“Dude,” Yoojin leans back, eyes wide, “That’s vital information, Flopson.”

“I was totally drunk, I barely even remember what we talked about. All I remembered was your name and your smi—” Jackson coughs, “You really wanted to switch costumes.”

“Wait,” Yoojin’s eyes widen so big she feels like they’ll fall out of her head, “You’re Captain America?”

“And you were a y nurse apparently.”

Yoojin imagines Flopson in her y nurse costume and the imagery is so absurd, she can't help but laugh, “You actually agreed to it?”

“I make a great y nurse, Burger Girl. I have great legs, I mean have you seen these thighs?”

Axe Man looks down, nodding approvingly, “Wow. Thick thighs save lives, man.”

“Exactly!” Jackson grins and Yoojin watches in horror and confusion as Jackson and Axe Man fist bump like true bros.

Yoojin narrows her eyes then, frowning at where they’ve fist bumped (as if Axe Man isn’t still holding the gun). “Why didn’t you tell me? And why do you keep calling me ‘Burger Girl’ if you know my real name?”

“You didn’t seem like you remembered me and I didn’t think it was a big deal. At least until this creep showed up.” Jackson pauses before adding, with narrowed eyes and an accusing voice, “Why do I call you Burger Girl? Why do you keep calling me Flopson?”

“You have to admit, it’s clever.” Axe Man intercedes.

“Bro.” Jackson gasps and Axe Man holds his hands up in concession, as if to say sorry bro.

Yoojin nods, pointing her chin in Axe Man’s direction, “He’s not wrong.”

Jackson moves to respond, but then Axe Man interrupts, “Wait a second, why are we talking about this? I’m supposed to shoot you!”

“No, you’re bros.” Yoojin says, pointing between Jackson and Axe Man. “You can’t shoot a bro. Isn’t that against the bro code or something?”

Axe Man opens his mouth then closes it. Jackson nods, “Yeah, it is, bro.”

Axe Man glances back at his biker gang, although half of them have seemed to disappear into the bar across the street, leaving their empty bikes in the middle of the street. “Is it? Jaehyo?”

“Zico, who cares?” A pretty boy with a stoic expression says, his gaze pinned on his fingers.

Axe Man—Zico, apparently, though Yoojin likes Axe Man better—jabs his gun at Jackson and Yoojin, the gun poking Jackson on the cheek, “Jaehyo’s right! Who cares? If you were truly a bro, you’d know you’re not supposed to be here. Also bros don’t stop bros from hooking up with cute girls who were willing to listen to their mixtape without coercion or free food.”

“Please, don’t.” Yoojin squeaks, watching Axe Man Zico press at the safety of his gun, the clicking sound echoing all around them. Her heart bangs against her chest and she whimpers softly. She’s too young and too petty to die right now. She has too many people she needs to prove wrong and Axe Man Zico is going to take it all away from her.

Jackson reaches back and grabs her hand tight just as Axe Man Zico aims the gun, and—

“RING DING DONG DING DING DONG DING DING DING—”Click.

Yoojin jumps further into Jackson’s back, making him stumble forward. Axe Man Zico yelps, spinning on his heels, “Is that Ring Ding Dong? WHO the FUC—oh?”

Yoojin has her arms wrapped around Jackson like she’s a koala bear and he’s a tree, but Jackson doesn’t shake her off. She just hears a soft, “No ing way.”

Axe Man Zico turns visibly pale, almost ghostly white, but before he can say anything else, a voice projects across the street and Yoojin stares at the familiar boy on a bicycle in confusion.

She remembers him from the dance off, the kid holding the boom box during the Burger suit dance-off debacle (especially since he has the same boom box balanced precariously on the basket at the front of his four speed bike as if it’s a normal thing to do, which, for him, probably is). Clearly, he’s the one that blasted critically acclaimed single Ring Ding Dong in order to get their attention, which she’d like to applaud him for because now that song’s going to be stuck in her head for the next five years.

He’s a part of Team Burger King, she can already tell from the way Jackson is fidgeting in her arms while whispering, “What the hell does he think he’s doing? He’s going to die and Jaebum’s going to resurrect me just to kick my back into the grave. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.”

Boom Box Boy smiles brightly, a beautiful smile that she swears could cure cancer and incite world peace. His smile could literally make flowers grow and she’s seen Momo smile. The fact that she’s already dazed and confused and she’s only seen his smile from across the street means that this boy has a lethal weapon in his possession and apparently it works wonders on biker gangs, too. The missing half of Axe Man Zico’s biker gang lurk out of the tiny alleyways and that rundown looking bar, to-go bags with yellow smiley faces glinting back at her. They also look dazed by this smiling, boom box carrying, angel, and it’s quite a sight, seeing grown burly men that could rival Vin Diesel floored by a wispy, smiling boy with a red bike and an old, vintage boom box that seems too big for his small body.

Then he laughs and Yoojin is truly floored. If she thought his smile was angelic, then his laughter had to be a loud, chorus of angels and he is the sun their entire universe revolves around. The boy’s smile has her waxing poetry and, from the looks of it, everyone else around them is just as stunned as she is.

“Zico! What are you doing?” He sounds so happy, she half expects a chorus of angels to sing after every sentence that leaves his mouth.

Axe Man Zico shakes his head and she blinks rapidly at his reaction. He’s pale beyond belief and he looks genuinely terrified of this Angel Boy. “N—nothing.”

The boy walks forward, rolling his bike along while his boom box teeters on the verge of falling out of the white bike basket. The entire biker gang steps back simultaneously. “You sure you’re not harassing my friends here?” Angel Boy tilts his head, his eyes wide and his expression cute and innocent. Somehow he’s still inciting fear in this biker gang. “You’re holding a gun.”

Axe Man Zico throws the gun. “No, I’m not. We’re just joking around. Ha-ha.” He glances at his friends and they all start to laugh, unnatural and fake and highly terrified. He holds out a fist for Jackson to bump and Jackson makes a face at him.

Angel Boy blinks owlishly. Then he shrugs, smiles, and says, “Okay, cool. Hey, Jackson, let’s go.” He looks directly at Axe Man Zico, “You mind if I take them with me?”

“No, of course not. Ha-ha, go ahead!” Axe Man Zico practically stutters, waving his hands.

Yoojin still has her arms wrapped around Jackson and he’s moving faster than she thinks he’s ever moved before, scrambling away from Axe Man Zico and his terrifying biker gang.

“By the way, the new mixtape was great, man.” Angel Boy calls over his shoulder, his smile disarming. Zico looks like he'll pee his pants in both fear and gratitude.

They start walking and it takes Yoojin a minute to realize she’s still practically clinging to Flopson Wang, Enemy Number One. She sheepishly disengages herself from his person, ignoring the heat on her face, and focuses on the boy with the bike.

“What just happened?” She asks aloud.

“My dad owns them.” Angel Boy says, shrugging as if he’s reading out of a textbook. “It’s no big deal.”

“No big deal?” Yoojin repeats because last time she checked, your father being the gang leader of a mid-sized college town is not no big deal. It’s at least worth a shocked look from said gang leader’s son.

“I thought you were joking about that.” Jackson mutters the same time she speaks, completely shocked.

Angel Boy glances between them, as if he’s trying to figure out who to respond to. And then he focuses on Jackson.

“Why would I joke about that?” Angel Boy frowns.

“I mean why would you just tell people about that?” Jackson asks.

“Because you guys are my friends and I didn’t want to lie to you.”

Yoojin blinks at Angel Boy’s wide eyes, slight pout, and absolutely genuine expression and she’s instantly endeared. She’s almost tempted to obnoxiously exclaim awwwww the same way Jongin does when he sees a dog anywhere in his vicinity.

Of course, Jackson Wang beats her to it. “Awwww, Youngjae.” Jackson squeals, practically pulling Angel Boy—Youngjae—into a chokehold. Instead of shoving him into the middle of the street like she would have done, the boy laughs, smacking Jackson as he lets Jackson smother him (acting like a true angel, really, because she would have fought him and his entire family).

Yoojin almost smiles at the sight. Almost.

~.~.~.~.~

“You guys missed out on some wild stuff.” Youngjae says, when North and South Main Street is right on the horizon. Yoojin didn’t think she’d ever be this happy to see McDonald’s.

Yoojin glances at Jackson, who gives her a pointed look because, unfortunately for her, he hasn’t managed to forget that she was the cause of the entire incident. She was half hoping the gun slinging Axe Man Zico would make him forget. “What happened?” She’s so exhausted she doesn’t even want to know.

“Jaebum wants a tournament. Winner takes all. Duel to the death. Burgercide.” Youngjae sounds ominous and the static emanating from his boom box only makes the atmosphere more menacing.

Jackson gives him a look, “Did you just say Burgercide?”

Youngjae nods solemnly. “Jaebum wants ketchup-blood.”

Yoojin sighs, grimacing at how gross and exhausted she feels, “Well, I need a shower.”

Jackson snorts. Yoojin blames exhaustion for the small smile she gives him and the small smile he gives back.

A/N: UM THIS IS LITERALLY A CRACKFIC but thank you thank you to everyone who is reading!!!

And there is the last member of got7, youngjae, a literal angel, every time he laughs an angel gets his wings, God cries, we all are saved, my crops are watered, the harvest is good. anyways, now it's time to get Lit, my kids. 

tell me what you thought! especially at my ty attempt at a mystery plot lol

xoxo