It doesn’t take Seunghyun long to realise that when he’s hung up on someone, everything’s different.

People become strange. Old things that he used to enjoy become boring. Staying at home and drinking wine now suddenly feels mundane. It’s as though each and every second he spends doing things that he previously enjoyed takes up the time he could have used to see Jiyong.

The one thing that becomes the most tiresome out of all is talking to people, and in particular, flirting.

Just because Seunghyun has suddenly realised his feelings, doesn’t mean that Jiyong knows about them. To Seunghyun it’s like the cataracts that had blinded him before are now removed. Gone. He can see the world with fresh eyes. Glassy film obstructing his vision no more.

However, although Seunghyun feels like a new man reborn, Jiyong hasn’t given him any indication that he knows of the transformation. To Seunghyun that was weird. His whole world has changed, things are different. How can’t Jiyong see?

But at the same time, Seunghyun realises that it’s also his own fault. He hasn’t made any move to tell him of his changed feelings, so why would Jiyong know?

All in all, he’s scared of Jiyong’s reaction. Sue him.

So, Seunghyun has to live his life despite the fact that Jiyong has no clue of his feelings. And, he has to remain the dutiful friend.

Apparently dutiful friend responsibilities included talking to girls. Seunghyun isn’t sure exactly where that fit on the scale of being a good friend, but all Jiyong has been telling him is to, ‘talk to ___, please? Okay hyung!’

“Hi.” Seunghyun smiles politely at the girl sitting next to him.

They’re at some club in some district that Seunghyun doesn’t often frequent. As soon as he entered the establishment, he and his friends were whisked away to the VIP tables without needing to say a word. Sometimes it’s handy to have celebrity status.

“Hi oppa,” the girl giggles, shyly looking at him through her pretty lashes.

“What’s your name?” Seunghyun asks for the lack of a better question. He takes a sip of his drink, bringing his attention back to the girl beside him.

It isn’t like she’s not hot. Because she is. Her long brown hair seeps past her uncovered shoulders, and Seunghyun briefly takes note of her even longer slender legs.

She’s hot. Really hot.

It’s just that she’s not Jiyong.

And that’s what makes things hard. Because even though Seunghyun likes her hair, his mind automatically gives him images of Jiyong when he had long hair. And when Seunghyun interestedly observes her legs, his mind filters images of Jiyong’s milky legs.

It’s like his head is telling him to not even try, because Jiyong is number one.

“I’m a big fan of you, oppa. I love your rap,” the girl tries once again when he fails to respond.

Seunghyun continues to smile politely at her, berating himself when he realises that he didn’t pay attention to her name.

“Thanks, I like rapping,” Seunghyun responds, taking another sip of his drink. “What about you, do you like rapping?”

The girl laughs at him like he’s told some outrageous joke. Seunghyun joins in with the laughter, albeit awkwardly because he didn’t mean for it to be a joke.

“Oh no, I’m a model,” she crosses her legs and Seunghyun’s drift towards the movement.

Jiyong has prettier legs.

“A model?” Seunghyun moves closer to her, cocking his head to the side. “Me too! We have so many things in common.”

“I know! I love oppa’s shoots. You always look so handsome,” she flicks her hair behind her shoulder, revealing her prominent collarbones.

Jiyong has prettier collarbones.

“You’re very handsome too,” Seunghyun replies and for a second the girl looks a bit surprised before she giggles at him.

Her hand reaches out towards him and her long manicured fingers pat him on the chest. Seunghyun stares at her fingers for a few seconds, trying to stop his mind from telling him things that he already knows.

But he fails to stop his brain from wandering.

Jiyong has prettier hands.

When Seunghyun takes another sip of his drink, he sighs. He doesn’t think he’s trying to be sarcastic on purpose, but the words just fall off his tongue somewhat bitterly. Whether or not it’s because he’s being forced to talk to this girl, he’s not sure.

He shoots a glance in the other direction, trying to find Jiyong and he wonders how long he has to stay with this girl. Honestly, he has no idea why Jiyong constantly throws girls at him. The past few times they have been out, Jiyong’s been telling him to talk to this girl or that girl. And although he’ll acquiesce to each and every demand without question, he’s starting to get a bit tired.

There’s something about talking to these girls that is just so boring. Not that the girls are boring themselves. Seunghyun knows they’re probably lovely girls, but it’s all the same to him. He says something, they giggle, the process repeats. It’s just dull. He’d rather sit at home and watch a movie, because really the only person he wants to talk to is Jiyong and yet Jiyong is the one forcing him to say hello.

When he eventually gets the guts to tell Jiyong that he doesn’t want to talk to girls, the other stops to think. Seunghyun awkwardly waits on the plushy couch, eyes roaming the expansive room.

“I got it!” Jiyong says loudly, flicking his hand towards the table and grinning unsettlingly at his hyung. Seunghyun smiles back at him warily, unsure of his plans. “Be right back, hyung.”

Taking another sip of his drink, Seunghyun relaxes back on the chair. He drums his fingers on the table, throwing his legs out in spite. He knows that Jiyong’s going to find another girl, he can feel it in his bones. There was just something in Jiyong’s smile that told him that he wasn’t off the hook yet. When he tries to think about it, he has no idea why the other is doing it. Is he trying to set him up with someone? Because that’s the only reason he can think of.

When Jiyong comes back tugging a male companion, Seunghyun is confused.

Firstly, Seunghyun thought that Jiyong was trying to set him up. If so, why is he dragging a guy across the room?

His hand grips the glass of his cup and he tries to swallow the large lump down his throat.

How did Jiyong know? Is he really obvious? Can Jiyong just tell that he wants him and this is his way of letting him off easy.

Jiyong gently eases the boy in the seat next to Seunghyun, smiling brightly as he does so. Seunghyun absentmindedly drags his eyes across the other boy’s features, letting out a smile at the other’s nervous expression.

“Hyung, this is Jinho. Jinho this is Seunghyun,” Jiyong explains, a wide smile on his face. “Jinho is thinking of trying out at YG.”

The boy looks embarrassed at Jiyong’s aimless chatter, blushing deeply when Seunghyun rests his gaze on him.

He’s pretty, just like the girl he was with tonight. Jinho’s light brown eyes flitter downwards and Seunghyun casts a glance down to fully appreciate the boy’s lean figure. He’s really pretty.

When Jiyong catches his gaze and grins, Seunghyun rolls his eyes.

He’s pretty but he’s not Jiyong pretty.

However, apparently Jiyong doesn’t realise Seunghyun’s inner turmoil and quickly excuses himself. When Jiyong scuttles off to do whatever he does in clubs nowadays, Seunghyun sighs and turns his attention towards Jinho.

“Hi.”

“Hi uh, may I call you hyung?” Jinho asks, putting his hands together.

“Sure,” Seunghyun says, his eyes flittering over the dance floor. He finds Jiyong standing and talking to one of his Japanese friends that had come down for a visit. Seunghyun can’t help the smile that crosses his face when he sees how animated Jiyong is, all excited and bouncy.

“Thanks hyung. Um, Jiyong-hyung said that you like art?” Jinho asks from the side.

Seunghyun brings his attention back to him once again, his interest peaking slightly at the mention of his past-time hobby.

“Yeah, I do. Do you like art?” Seunghyun asks in return.

The other has a sheepish smile on his face. “Well, my sister is a curator so I’m forced to like it.”

Jinho starts to loosen up as he talks about his sister and the gallery she owns. When he gets past his nervousness, Seunghyun finds himself laughing at the other. Surprisingly, he finds himself having fun and enjoying the time with Jinho. They continue talking about different topics from art, to architecture to singing.

“So you want to join YG? For singing?” Seunghyun asks.

He’s facing Jinho, his left arm stretched over the glass table. Jinho smiles back at him and reaches an arm out, tentatively brushing a finger against Seunghyun’s thumb.

Out of everything, it’s this that brings Seunghyun’s attention away from Jinho to Jiyong. It takes him a few seconds but he eventually finds his best friend on the other side of the room. Unexpectedly he finds Jiyong staring straight at them with a confusing expression on his face. However, when he catches Seunghyun’s eye, the weird look changes to a large grin complete with two thumbs up.

“Hyung?” Jinho says softly.

Seunghyun blinks and removes his hand from the table. He claps his hands together and smiles apologetically at Jinho.

“Sorry, what were you saying?”

The other just continues to smile at him. “I know you like him.”

Seunghyun’s mouth drops open in surprise. “What?”

Jinho lets out a small giggle. “You’re so obvious, I’m surprised he doesn’t know.”

“I am?” Seunghyun breathes out a hesitant laugh.

, he didn’t know he was obvious. He thought he was keeping himself under control.

“In what ways?” Seunghyun asks, rubbing a hand over his arm self-consciously.

Jinho hums, moving a finger over to tap at his chin.

Seunghyun looks at him more closely, seeing if he can spot anything about the other. When he looks at him thoroughly, starting from his black fringe, all his mind is providing him with are the words: Jiyong is so pretty. Jiyong is gorgeous. Jiyong is smart. Jiyong is funny.

No matter what Seunghyun does, his brain forces him to think about Jiyong. He can’t even force himself to look at Jinho without his mind sending him subconscious messages of all the reasons why he loves Jiyong.

“That’s it, that’s the look,” Jinho says suddenly, peering at him through long lashes. “Whenever you look at him, you’re gone. Totally besotted.”

Besotted. He’s besotted.

He’s obvious and besotted. Great.

If he’s just so obvious then Jiyong obviously knows.

And if Jiyong knows that means the only reason why he’s forcing him to speak to people is to pawn Seunghyun off to someone. He wants Seunghyun to find someone else to like.

These thoughts cause Seunghyun’s heart to pang in his chest. The fact that Jiyong has to indirectly tell him that he’s probably coming on a bit too strong, hurts. Why can’t Jiyong just tell him that he’s not interested? Is it to save Seunghyun’s feelings? But doesn’t he realise that Seunghyun is the kind of person that appreciates honesty? All he wants is people to be frank with him. Doesn’t Jiyong know that?

“What’s wrong?” Jinho asks, frowning.

Seunghyun opens his mouth to respond but instead closes it. He lets out a large sigh, trying to figure out how to explain what’s wrong.

“Are you worried that he doesn’t like you?”

“How did you know?” Seunghyun responds with a laugh, his lips widening despite himself. He’s surprised Jinho has managed to get to the crux of all Seunghyun’s issues tonight. Is he a face reader or something? A psychic? 

Jinho shrugs, leaning over and taking a sip of his cocktail. “Just seemed to be the logical conclusion when I saw how sad you looked.”

Seunghyun nods his head slowly. Okay, true. Maybe not a psychic then.

“I think he likes you,” Jinho leans over and says conversationally.

Seunghyun immediately wants to argue and say no, no he doesn’t but he stops himself. Jinho has been magic man tonight, where is he coming from when he says that?

“Why do you think so?” Seunghyun asks, still feeling down.

Jinho bites his lip, “Well, I don’t know. I can just tell. There’s something between you guys.”

He frowns and shakes his head.

“There’s always been something between us,” Seunghyun responds drearily, “Friendship.”

Jinho rolls his eyes. “Not that. Something romantic. I can tell.”

Reaching over to grab his glass, Seunghyun grumbles. “What are you? Clairvoyant?”

In reality, Seunghyun understands that Jinho has been nice. Extremely nice. And he’s been extremely perceptive, so perhaps he should take at least some heed to what the other is saying. But at the same time, Jiyong liking him makes no sense. If he likes him then why is he doing the things he does? Why is he making Seunghyun meet people for any other reason than wanting him to get with them? If Jiyong likes him, why isn’t Jiyong the one here with him!

So, Seunghyun tells Jinho just that, waiting to see if his paranormal ability can figure this mystery out. Jinho is a good listener, nodding his head at all the appropriate moments. He spends a few seconds after Seunghyun finishes his spiel, thinking the situation through.

“So, you see now? Why it doesn’t make sense?” Seunghyun says the words with a tad too much resentment and inwardly berates himself for doing so. There’s no need to be rude to the guy who wants to help him.

Jinho, a good sport, just nods sagely.

“I’m sure there’s something there, though. He looks at you like a fangirl looking at her favourite idol. That’s got to mean something.”

Who knows what that means, but it doesn’t mean he likes him the same way Seunghyun likes him.

“Go talk to him, see what you can gauge from him,” Jinho looks down at his phone. “I have to go now, but it was really nice meeting you, hyung. I hope you can figure it all out soon.”

Jinho leans over waiting for a hug and Seunghyun gives him just that.

“Thank you so much. I really enjoyed speaking with you.” Seunghyun says when he leans back.

Jinho smiles at him, reaching over to type his number in Seunghyun’s phone.

“I’ll call you sometime!” Seunghyun says to the other’s retreating figure.

Jinho turns back and laughs at him, “You better call to tell me that you got him.”

Seunghyun grins. “Fingers crossed.”  

The smile lasts on his face, and he picks up his drink once more. When he puts the glass back down, he sees Jiyong. His smile drops when he notices the look the other is wearing. It’s the same look from before. The weird one that Seunghyun didn’t know the meaning of.

Before Seunghyun has the time to ask what’s wrong, Jiyong turns to him.

“Did you enjoy your time with Jinho?”

Seunghyun instead continues to frown. There’s something wrong with Jiyong.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m just asking if you enjoyed your time with Jinho.” But Jiyong’s not daring to even looking him in the eyes. His gaze is fixed on the seat, not moving past the ratty material.

“I did…” Seunghyun says, he softens the tone of his voice. “What’s wrong Ji?”

Jiyong gulps at that, his lip curling and getting caught behind his teeth. Seunghyun watches Jiyong as he bites down on the soft flesh, wondering what happened.

“I… didn’t realise you liked guys.”

Seunghyun’s eyebrows fly up at that.

“Then why did you bring Jinho?” Seunghyun asks.

“It was a joke at first,” Jiyong responds, his eyes still glued to the seat. “I didn’t realise you actually would like him. No wonder why you didn’t like all the girls.”

Seunghyun opens his mouth and then closes it. He’s ashamed to admit that he’s never told Jiyong about his like for men. At first he thought he just liked Jiyong but over time he realised that while Jiyong was the only one he wanted, his interest didn’t stop there.

“I’ve liked men for awhile,” Seunghyun returns, awkwardly rubbing the back of his arm. “But that’s not why I didn’t like the girls…”

He trails off when he realises that there’s only one way that sentence was going to end, and that’s with him proclaiming his love for Jiyong.

Jiyong lifts his head up and finally Seunghyun sees the eyes that has plagued him with many sleepless nights.

“Why didn’t you tell me you liked men?” Jiyong has seemed to have ignored his previous statement.

Seunghyun doesn’t know how to answer the question. Jiyong seems so sad that Seunghyun had never told him. His expression looks like Seunghyun’s broken his heart, why didn’t you tell me hyung when I told you.

“I’m sorry Jiyong,” Seunghyun’s helpless. He doesn’t know what to say to make Jiyong feel better.

“I don’t understand why you didn’t tell me, I just.” Jiyong lets out a shaky breath, his eyes filling up with tears. “I thought I didn’t have a chance…”

He says the last sentence so softly Seunghyun is sure he heard it wrong.

“What did you say?” He asks to make sure, his heartrate increasing.

Jiyong looks shocked to have been heard, and he quickly raises a palm up to wipe the tears that surfaced.

Reaching over, Seunghyun brings his thumb to Jiyong’s cheek, wiping a tear that he had missed. The other just positively melts under his palm and finally Seunghyun sees what Jinho has apparently been seeing. Jiyong eyes meet his gaze and he looks at Seunghyun like he can’t believe he’s there, like Seunghyun is his whole world, and it’s only now that he realises it. Jiyong’s eyes are filled with sadness and Seunghyun moves closer towards him, encroaching into his personal space. He brushes Jiyong’s soft cheeks, and coos when a flurry of tears pool once again at the corner of his eyes.

With haste, Seunghyun grabs Jiyong into a tight hug, burying his face in Jiyong’s neck.

“I love you, Jiyong. I’ve loved you for years. That’s why I’ve not been interested in any of these girls. Or guy.”

“You love me?!” Jiyong sounds so positively wrecked, like he never imagined that result. “I thought… but… I thought I had no chance.”

Seunghyun shakes his head, breathing in deeply, feeling the warmth of Jiyong’s slight frame.

“It’s been you. It’s always been you.”

He hears an astounded breath leave the other, and smiles to himself in fondness.

They continue to cuddle for a long moment before a thought reaches Seunghyun’s head. He leans back and stares at the other.

“Why were you forcing me to talk to all these girls?”

Jiyong blushes and laughs, moving his head down in embarrassment.

“Hey, no, tell me.” Seunghyun smiles encouragingly.

“I just… could tell that you didn’t like talking to them. And that you’d rather talk to me… so I did it because I wanted you to realise how much you liked talking to me instead…”

Seunghyun is stunned silent for a few seconds and then he lets out the loudest laugh. He can’t stop laughing at the lengths Jiyong has gone to ensure Seunghyun’s love for him and it takes him almost a minute to calm down. Jiyong continues to blush right next to him and Seunghyun sends him an affectionate look. He reaches out his thumb again and gently rubs Jiyong’s cute cheeks with fondness.

He loves Jiyong so much.

Seunghyun leans over to whisper in his ear, looking like he’s about to say something conspiratorial. But instead all he says is, “You’re beautiful, you’re funny, you’re everything I could ever want.”

And Jiyong just smiles his gummy smile and Seunghyun is once again shell shocked from just how gorgeous the other is.

Later, they kiss each other good night and although Seunghyun isn’t really into that mushy , he’s sure fireworks were going off in his head the whole time.

“Thanks Seunghyun,” Jiyong’s been smiling since the confession and Seunghyun promises to the best of his ability to never let that smile fade.

Jiyong jumps into the cab with a huge grin that Seunghyun matches, waving as the other closes the door. Seunghyun lets out a huge sigh, his chest feeling nice and heavy.

He pulls out his phone and dials in the number he received tonight.

“Jinho… You’ll never guess…”

~the end~