jiyong was in an absolute mess after the kiss. they cuddled right after, his lips were still tingly from the kiss and cheeks burning at the memory of his older friend’s tongue in his mouth. jiyong felt safe in seunghyun’s hold but  the tranquillity of the moment was suddenly interrupted by questions at the back of jiyong’s mind were begging to be answered. he was at war with himself whether he should open his mouth and ask or let seunghyun say something, anything, but seunghyun was quiet. the longer the silence went on, the harder it was for jiyong to breathe. so he made a lame excuse of needing to be home because of an errand his mother gave him.

seunghyun as dense as he could be knew what a poor constructed lie was and what was not but still let jiyong go, making himself believe he made his best friend feel uncomfortable. he tried to hide the sadness in his eyes when jiyong picked up his last item and shoved it in his bag.

and he felt as he if was punched in the gut when he saw jiyong’s crestfallen face as he said his goodbye.

***

it had been weeks since the incident in the choi’s residence, jiyong would still feel the tingling sensation on his lips whenever he caught a glimpse of his older friend. it would have been easier if he didn’t like the kiss, but he did, so much. he wallowed in so much self-pity and slight self-loathe for letting the kiss happen and ruining the friendship they just revived. neither of them sent a text message to the other and jiyong felt heavier each day. coming to a conclusion that he really ed up their friendship and that things were beyond repair, because who the kisses their best friend, right?! but seunghyun hyung kissed you too! jiyong decided to just push his feelings down to the deepest part of his soul and bury the memory into the farthest back of his mind. he had his studies to focus on and he was sure seunghyun did too. considering he was a graduating student.

on the last day of the school year, jiyong found himself dragging his body out of his examination room with his bag almost touching the floor and eyes about to drop from staying up late the past few nights. no matter how much he busied himself with his books, he could still feel the hollow in his chest that no amount of how self appreciation and happiness would be able to fill.

he was too tired to hold a proper conversation let alone walk without his knees wobbling. so when he made a turn to retrieve his remaining things from his locker, he barely registered that he bumped into someone. someone too familiar to him.

“sorr- ji?”

jiyong almost jumped. he knew that voice, and with slightly trembling body he looked up at the boy in front of him.

seunghyun.

“hey, you look sick! have you been sleeping?”

jiyong almost snorted and if he only had enough energy, he would be pushing seunghyun away but he missed the warmth only seunghyun could bring. before he could stop himself he dropped his bag and immediately wrapped his arms around the taller boy’s torso and held as tight as he could.

seunghyun stiffened at the sudden contact. he looked around when everyone began murmuring but passed by them without making any more commotion, getting out of the school as soon as they could to have a taste of their summer break was far more exciting than gossiping about two best friends hugging at the hallway.

he returned the hug almost tentatively and jiyong almost whimpered. they stayed there for a while before jiyong slowly pulled away and tried to run away but seunghyun was faster and managed to catch him by the arm.

“let me go.” seunghyun heard jiyong say coldly. he felt a shiver run down his spine at jiyong’s tone but he did not budge.

“seunghyun i said let me g-“

“no!”

jiyong looked up at seunghyun with teary eyes causing the older boy to loosen his grip. jiyong then yanked his arm away and hugged himself. he felt so small and helpless in front of seunghyun.

“i’m tired seunghyun. so tired. you always do this. one moment we’re okay and the next we’re not. you ignored me again. and do you know what was worse? you made me feel like nothing happened after you kissed me.”

jiyong wiped his own tears away and did not wait for any explanation, running away as fast as he could.

he cried himself to sleep that night, burying his tears and whimpers into his pillows.

he woke up the next morning to the sounds of a large truck pulling over and a person shouting instructions from across the street. he momentarily cursed himself for not closing his windows from the night before but he was too sad to get up and close his windows now so he pulled his blanket over his head instead. however when he heard mrs. choi called seunghyun’s name followed by instructions about putting his box into the truck, jiyong leapt from his bed and immediately stood by the window to see what was going on.

there in front of seunghyun’s house parked a moving truck and men loading mrs. choi’s couch into the truck. he watched in utter disbelief and horror as seunghyun got inside the back of the truck with a box in his hands.

he hurriedly ran out of his room and down the stairs, ignoring his parents calling out for him and asking why he was in a rush. he did not care if his hair was a mess, his eyes were puffy from crying the night before and if he was still wearing his pyjamas. all he could think of was seunghyun going away and the possibility of not seeing his best friend anymore.

he was standing right next to the truck and watching with wide eyes as more of the choi’s furniture were being loaded into the truck. he did not know he had been crying again until he felt warmth over his cheeks and fingers wiping his tears away.

“it’s too early for you to cry you know.”

seunghyun was smiling at him. it was the same smile seunghyun gave him when they were still in kindergarten, when jiyong gave him some of the cookies his mother made for them.

“b-but you’re leaving, and i messed up our friendship,” jiyong hiccupped, “we can’t hang out anymore. you jerk!”

he could not stop his tears and was very close to kicking or punching seunghyun for just laughing. laughing at him maybe.

“i’m staying.”

jiyong stopped crying and blinked at seunghyun.

“for two more weeks i mean, but still staying here.”

jiyong stood there in silence and slight awkwardness before he began slowly shifting.

“my mom found a job in daegu and it’s more convenient for her and noona, noona also found a good senior high school program for me there. i’m sorry you had to find out this way and i’m mostly sorry for not saying anything after we you know, kissed.” seunghyun looked away, his cheeks turning a bit rosy.

jiyong could feel another headache and he was very confused for any confrontations so he held his head and looked at seunghyun. he couldn’t find his voice let alone make his brain function properly.

seunghyun took this as his cue to continue. “i’m sorry for being a jerk but i’ll never be sorry for kissing you. i’d like to do it again, only if you allow me to of course but i would understand if you hate me right now and do not want to see me again.”

the younger boy slowly put his hands down and blinked at his suddenly nervous friend. it was rather adorable to watch seunghyun get this flustered because he usually do not.

“ji- please, please say something.” seunghyun said exasperatedly and jiyong could not help the giggle escaping his lips.

“i- i forgive you for being a jerk. but i don’t think i can forgive you for leaving me.”

seunghyun’s eyes widened and nodded in understanding. he was about to open his mouth to say something when he felt a pair of chapped lips on his and a beaming jiyong peering up at him.

“you said two weeks right? we still have two weeks. start making it up to me, okay? because i will seriously not forgive you the next time.” 

i'm so sorry if it took so long ;; my muse disappeared and it was very hard to write again, but today this happened. 

tell me what you think! thanks 

alsooo, i updated the tags :*