“And a one...and a two… and a three.. start.”

Hoon’s P.O.V-

I felt pathetic that I lost another friend. I should be used to this but.. I’m not. I walked back to my home and groaned at the number of cars in the driveway. Great... maybe it isn’t such a good idea to stay here. I pulled up my hood and reached into my pocket, pulling out one of my extra masks. I always had one with me.. just in case. Putting the mask on made me feel..safe. Alive in a way. It was late so everyone was asleep. It was just me. I had my headphones plugged in and was listening to an American song. I didn’t know where I would go. I didn’t care at the moment. In the end I found myself in the front gates of my school. How funny… I climbed over the gates and slightly scratched myself on the pointy bars. I always left my practice room open so getting into there wasn’t a problem for me. I didn’t have any bags or extra jackets with me so I used the one I had on as a pillow. I rested my body on the hard cold bench and stared at my reflection from the other mirror. How are you doing?... Are you mad at me?... I think you are… but this is the only way. Unknowingly, tears slowly dropped down from my eyes. As much as I tried to fall asleep, nothing would work. I angrily sat up and glared into my reflection. How ugly. I got up and started dancing. The song from earlier was on replay. It was called Gods and Monsters. I forget who the singer is.. but it speaks to me. Weird really… I never really feel much from songs. Not lately that is. My eyes were piercing the opposite ones as I competed with myself, trying to make the other mess up. Hours ended up passing and sweat was dripping down my face. I moved to the right but quickly froze from the insane pain in my head. My legs felt slightly weak and I fell back, into someone's arms. My eyes weakly looked up to see a handsome face. And then.. all black.

Seungcheol’s P.O.V-

We were all headed to the practice room since we had nothing better to do. Hyemi said she hadn’t seen Hoon all morning but I had a feeling he was just in the practice room, dancing like always. However when we opened the door, we didn’t see him dancing. He was passed out onto the floor, shirtless. I felt worried and quickly rushed over to make sure he was okay. His eyes slowly opened and I was met with his tired ones. He silently sat up and brought his hand up to the side of his head. Was he having a hangover? He didn’t speak but slightly looked around. It was as if he was trying to find someone. Before I could even speak, his phone rang. His hands slowly reached for it and he stared for a couple seconds. His eyes soon widened and he practically jumped up and ran out of the room to answer it. My eyes scanned the room, His shirt was neatly folded onto one of the chairs and there was no trace of anything else. Why did he stay the night here? I heard the door open and saw him walk in, looking a bit depressed. It must have been about his sister.. I felt the sudden urge to hug him.. but what would the guys say? I can’t have these kinds of feelings. I can’t do this to our group. We will finish up our lessons at the academy and I’ll forget about Hoon. That is just how things are going to end. His eyes looked dark as if he was lost. Confused even. “Is everything okay Hoon?” Before the boy could even answer, the door opened and his bandmates came in. “Hoonie! We should start making our way to the stage. Oh.. and someone wanted me to call you. It was a lady.” I noticed the slight confusion. It wasn’t his mother so who? Perhaps.. the lady from the cafe? Would she really come? Why? She was too old to be his girlfriend so.. who is she? The boy nodded nevertheless but still refused to speak. Something is wrong.. he hasn’t spoken a word all this time. We walked silently to the stage when the same lady from the cafe slowly walked up to Hoon. He looked completely shocked but quickly bowed. She smiled softly to him and slightly dragged him away.

Hoon’s P.O.V-

I didn’t have a clue what she was doing here. Did something happen with her?.. “Relax Hoon.. Not every time I see you means there is something wrong.” She chuckled at my slightly embarrassed expression. “She wanted me to record you singing actually. Since she isn’t here to cheer you on, she still wanted to see your performance.” I slightly frowned but it quickly disappeared. If she wanted that.. then I will do my best. “She would also like it if you came by to visit her. She has been missing you dearly these past few days.” I grinned at the thought of seeing her again. It feels like it has been forever. It’s been far too long. I nodded at the nurse and escorted her to the auditorium. I sat her down in the front row so she would have the perfect view. I then rushed backstage and could barely get my grin off. Everyone stared at me like I was someone entirely different but… she wanted to see me again. I was sure she would be angry… I promised I wouldn’t do this but she is still supporting me like this. I waited patiently for my turn before we headed onto our positions. When I got on stage, it was like she was the only one there. I couldn’t see Seventeen, Hyemi, BTOB, or any of the teachers. It was just her frail body, cheering me on softly.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ThIHWipCxT4

I was snapped out of it when the music started playing however even as I sang, I never broke eye contact from her. I grinned from time to time and could imagine her slightly rocking her head back and forth. I slightly winced at the intense pain in my head. It seemed Seventeen noticed because their faces only showed worry. I ignored it and kept singing. My eyes travelled to the back where I was met with the man from the night before. He looked so familiar. He wore all-black as well as a handsome smirk. I quickly ended the song and waited for the judges to make their decision. Of course, we passed. Once we were dismissed I practically sprinted to her. She patted my back and smiled. “You did very well. She will love it. I will see you there.” I couldn’t stop smiling. It honestly hurt. It has been ages since I last smiled so much. As she walked away, I felt my body becoming as light as air. “Hey Hoon, did something happen? You seem to be in a good mood.” Dino and his friends rushed over to me and slightly smiled. As much as I hated them and wanted to tell them to buzz off, the only thing I could do was smiled and nod. They too seemed shocked by my answer. I slightly waved to them and rushed out of the school. I had to get her something. It actually felt like a nice day. The sun was out and it finally felt warm against my skin. It was as if we were finally on the same side. I walked into one of the convenient stores and purchased some fresh roses as well as some books. My sister was a bit nerdy so she liked reading. When I left the shop, Seventeen was waiting to greet me. “Hey Hoon where are you going?” I ignored them and kept walking. They continued to walk after me so I decided to tell them. I turned to glare at them and spoke. “I’m going to my boyfriends house. Stop being so nosy and go away will you?” They all stared at me in pure shock. It wasn’t like I could tell them I was going to see my sister. Then they would want to tag along. It would be the same if I said I was going to see my girlfriend. I knew some of them were still babies when it came to guys dating other guys so I went with that route. No way they would want to come along. “Sounds fun! We would love to meet the person that is willing to put up with you. Please, lead the way.” I slightly glared at Seungcheol and sighed. It was useless to run.. they would just catch up.. but they can’t know. I’m already risking it with having Seungcheol know. In the end, they walked with me to the hospital. “Hoon why are we at the hospital? Is your boyfriend sick?” I noticed the look the members gave me. Especially Seungcheol. I guess it must have clicked in his mind. As we walked inside the building, the familiar scent hit me. I hated hospitals.. I hate them so much. I checked and and slowly walked to her room. I knocked softly on the door and could hear a faint answer. When I opened it, I was met with her adorable, excited eyes. “Hoon!!” I quickly calmed her down but she was on the verge of tears. I didn’t want her to strain her voice. She gave me a long hug before releasing me and staring blankly at the guys behind me. I saw as her face turned dark red and it caused me to chuckle. I pointed behind me to where the shocked boys stood. “They sort of followed me here. Sorry Minah.” She slowly nodded but then smiled. “Are you my brothers friends? I didn’t think he had any.” She spoke in a teasing tone so I smiled. When the idiots finally regained themselves they bowed and introduced themselves. “Minah I brought you something.” I reached into my bag and pulled out the flowers as well as the books. I enjoyed watching her eyes light up in glee. “Omo thanks oppa!” Her voice was still pretty weak and yet, I could hear the excitement. It was as if the others weren’t in the room with us. I felt comfortable. “Oppa.. I saw your performance. Why didn’t you tell me you sung that well?” I noticed the tint of sadness in her voice and immediately, my smile faltered. “A-Ah.. I wasn’t all that interested in singing.” I heard her slightly cough before she spoke again. “And now? Are you interested now?” I was slightly taken aback by her question. Was I? No… I couldn’t be. I smiled softly at her and reassured her I wasn’t. It seemed to work since I saw the small smile on her face. My mouth was pretty dry and rough so I decided to get a quick drink of water. I felt bad leaving her alone. Especially with them but.. I figured nothing too bad would happen.

Seungcheol’s P.O.V-

The whole time I stared at her with worry. None of us besides me knew the reason why she was there. Why Hoon is like this. She quietly stirred in her bed, fidgeting with her fingers. Dino sat next to her and smiled brightly. Before he could even speak, she did. “How long have you been friends with my brother? He… he had never mentioned any friends before..” I was a bit confused at the tone in her voice. Why say it like that? “We first ran into him in school and have pretty much been following him ever since then.” Dino awkwardly scratched the back of his head while chuckling softly. I saw her smile but her eyes.. they seemed rather odd. I was beginning to wonder where Hoon was. He said he was getting some water but.. he should have been back by now. Did something happen? I didn’t want to be rude to her and just get up and leave but. “So Minah what is your dream?” I slightly froze as Vernon leaned against the wall and smiled at her. I remembered the entire story Hoon had told me. It replayed in my mind. Why did we have to talk about this of all things?! “I have wanted to become a singer my whole life. I love everything about singing and admire you all so much.. You guys are so dedicated to your lives and dreams.” I was taken aback by her answer. She was nothing like Hoon. He was the complete opposite. “Wahhh you want to sing? Mind sharing?” I saw her eyes slightly widen at the request. Oh no.. Hoon didn’t want us coming along so I doubt he would want us hearing her story. I practically forced him to do so and I remember his voice cracking. I keep thinking about it. How sad and helpess he looked that night. “A-Ah… sorry but my voice is a bit sore right now. I would like it if you all sang instead! Just a little bit.” She grinned at how nervous we all became. But.. we did as asked. We all harmonized together and swayed along to the beat. She lightly clapped her hands to the beat while smiling softly. Her eyes kept throwing me off. I don’t know what they held. It was pitch black. Was she really enjoying it? Or did she despise us like Hoon? The boy finally came back inside with an awkward smile which made me slightly raise my eyebrow. Where the hell had he been the whole time? He sat down next to her and chatted with her while we all just sat. It was as if they both had forgotten we were even in the room.

Hoon’s P.O.V-

The door opened and a nurse came in. “Oh I’m sorry I didn’t realize you had company. I’m afraid we have to do some tests.” I knew what she meant. We had to leave. I looked at Minah who was smiling sadly yet still holding onto my hand. “I’ll visit very soon. Would you like me to bring something next time?” As I stood up, she thought. “Strawberry cake!” She grinned happily and it caused me to laugh. She had an adorable eye-smile which never failed to lift up my spirits. I promised her the cake and soon, we were out of the building. We were walking in silence. None of them spoke. That is.. until.. “Hoon… we never knew you had a sister. Why was she in the hospital? Is she okay?” I stopped walking and turned to face them with a rather kind expression. I could hear the worry in their voices and it actually sounded… genuine. “She is fine. She gets to leave soon.” My voice came out softer and kinder than usual so it obviously took them off guard. “Thanks for coming along. I could tell she enjoyed seeing you all. I should get home but I will see you at school okay?” Before they could even respond I quickly turned around and started walking home. My thoughts were cloudy. Nothing made sense anymore. I could hear nothing. Not even my own heart beat. When I finally got home, I walked past him and headed straight for my room, locking it. Once I heard the click, my body slowly slid down to the ground. I raised my eyes up to the dark sky and moon and let the tears flow down. “How.. how can this happen?” I ran my hand through my hair before letting go and sobbing quietly.

-Flashback-

When I left the room for some water, the only thing running through my head was her. She was smiling today. That is good. I wish she will be able to smile more often. I leaned down for the water but quickly froze at the intense pain in the side of my head. My hand shot up for it and I groaned a bit louder than I should have. “Hoon are you okay?” I turned around to see Minah’s regular nurse, staring at me with concern. “Y-Yeah I’m fine.” I didn’t want to get myself into more debt but she quickly shook her head and dragged me along with her. She pushed me into a smaller room and stared at me. “Sit” I did as told and watched her as she checked my blood pressure as well as check my eyes. “I will need you to remove your clothing and change into this. Don’t worry I won’t charge you anything for this. I just want to make sure everything is fine.” I knew how stubborn she was so it was no use refusing. As I changed I began to think about our relationship. She was there during the accident. She was just a rookie at the time but she was more prepared than the others. She took care of us even when her shift had ended. She treated us like family. She stood by my side even when I was at my worst. She comforted us when we cried. She replaced our parents comfort whenever there was a thunderstorm and we were scared. She barely left the hospital because of us… I slightly chuckled and placed my folded clothes on the chair. “Lay down. I’m going to take a quick X-RAY.” I still thought none of this was necessary but if it would make her feel better, I guess I could. I layed down and closed my eyes as the machine scanned over me. I slightly heard her gasp and quickly shot my eyes up. I sat up and froze when I saw her hand raised to , muffling her crying. “Noona what is is? What’s wrong?” I couldn’t even get another word out because she hugged me tightly. Not knowing what to do, I comforted her the same way she comforted us. Rubbing her back and softly humming. I heard her slightly chuckle though a sob before she pulled away from me. “Hoon… listen to me. If we act fast we can fix it.” What was she talking about? Fix what? “You have a large brain tumor. I think it may have formed due to the damage you received in the car crash.” I began zoning out of her words and stared in shock. What?.... “We need to get it out fast Hoon. It could be deadly.” I finally snapped back in and quickly shook my head, standing up and starting to change. “No. I am already in enough debt. Just worry about getting Minah better. And noona.” I rushed over to her and grabbed her shoulders. “You cannot mention this to anyone. Especially Minah. She must never know.” She kept crying so I hugged her and then left. I was gone far too long. When I reached the room, I was about to open the door when something stopped me. I looked into the window and saw as Minah smiled and clapped along to them singing. She absolutely cannot know. I don’t need to take her smile away again. Not again.

Seungcheol’s P.O.V-

I was laying in bed when I decided to call Hyemi. She was pretty chipper but when I told her I met Hoon's sister, she changed. She said she wanted to meet me. So we did. We were both sitting in the practice room in silence. I was about to speak but she quickly did. “His sister… I hate her.” I was shocked at her words. What? Why? “She.. she keeps torturing Hoon but he is too blind to see it. Please don’t tell him I said that.. he would never forgive me.” I was so confused but nodded and urged her to continue. “She obviously knows he loves singing. How could she not? And yet she still forces him to quit it for her. She has him convinced it is nothing but a stupid dream. That he shouldn’t sing again.” As she spoke I remember how she spoke with him. When she asked if he had changed his mind about singing. Her eyes… could she really be like that? “She practically has him as her slave. He would do anything for her… and she knows that. So if she can’t sing… why not make sure he doesn’t either? Hoon only sees her as an angel who deserves everything. But he isn’t looking when we are. She.. she isn’t a nice person at all. She is the total opposite of Hoon.” I told her about when Hoon had left us alone with her. When she asked how long we had been his friend. I told her about the tone in her voice. “She is jealous. She acts like she adores Hoon but really… she can’t stand him. She can’t stand the idea that her brother is friends with famous idols. She wants him to have nothing to do with anything that could relate to her dream. Once.. I went with Hoon to visit her. Everything was going well but soon I left him to go to the bathroom. When I came back, I guess the door got stuck so Hoon had to get up to help me. I guess she didn’t think anyone could see her but from my angle… I could see perfectly. I saw how her kind eyes turned to annoyance and hatred. She was practically sending daggers to his back. She rudely knocked a stuffed bear down and then  later claimed it fell. I couldn’t tell Hoon though. It’s not like he would believe her. She wouldn’t be capable of that stuff. I just… I feel so bad for him. He risks everything and works so damn hard for her. He loses sleep every night just to keep working to save money for her! And she treats him like !” I was surprised at how angry she sounded. Hyemi was never one to snap like this. If anyone else heard it they would call her crazy… but I believe it. Those eyes obviously aren’t the same ones Hoon is looking at. They’re too dark….

Authors note- OKAYYY SOOOO SORRY ABOUT THE LATE UPDATE. OMG. O.O Hahaha but I recently had surgery and was recovering so I literally had NO time to work. But here the chapter is! Sorry for any gramatical errors. Its 4:20 AM and I am beginning to start losing my s to give one by one. Lol jk jk jk but seriously I am exhausted so excuse any errors.