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A romantic comedy returns from commercial break. Kyuhyun is rolled up inside the blanket, munching on a bagel while intensively trying to understand what the American actors are saying without cheating by reading the subtitles. A man with white hair is hassling around a Christmas tree, raising a young boy to set the little star on top of it. The man embraces the boy, placing him back on the floor where he becomes greeted by a happy pack of cats and dogs. Everyone’s smiling and laughing.

Kyuhyun chuckles by himself. So corny. He wonders whether Americans really spend their Christmas like that: huge, white smiles on their faces, trying to squeeze the festive spirit out of all the lights and presents and food.

“Don’t you dare to buy me anything expensive.”

Kyuhyun murmured from inside the thick scarf on his neck to the phone. He pretended to be deathly serious even though he wasn’t. He couldn’t have been happier. He was walking back to the dorm, holding a small bag in his hand. His fingers were freezing from the cold outside but they would never let go of the precious thing they were holding inside of them right now. It might’ve not been the coolest, most expensive, most thought-through Christmas gift ever purchased but it was something and he was so very proud of it. It wasn’t snowing, there were no pretty Christmas lights around but he still felt like the Santa himself.

“Why would I reveal you anything beforehand? Kyuhyun, by definition, gifts should be surprises.”

Eunhyuk’s voice squealed from the other end of the phone.  Kyuhyun’s smile widens. Okay, it was confirmed now. It was obvious from the boy’s tone: Eunhyuk had already bought something bothersome and expensive and well-thought and Kyuhyun could never invent a gift so good. There was no way he could help it anymore...and he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to.

“Are you at the dorm, Hyuk?”

“Yes.”

“Are there others?”

“Yeah, Kibum and Donghae are down in the kitchen and Sungmin…”

Eunhyuk swallowed his words and suddenly held his breath in a thoughtful silence. Kyuhyun couldn’t help but hum happily by himself. He was already standing outside the dorm, grinning alone in the darkness in front of the house.

“Why are you asking this?”

“Stay in your room.”

“Why?”

Kyuhyun chuckled excitedly and glanced up. From the phone, he heard how Eunhyuk was humming by himself and soon the curtains were opened on the second floor.

“What is inside of that bag, Kyuhyun?”

Eunhyuk asked suspiciously, staring at the younger one through the window. Kyuhyun smirked back, hiding the bag behind his body. Then he hanged up the call, giving an evil smirk towards the dark figure in the window. Even though he couldn’t see Eunhyuk’s face, he could visualise what kind of a perfectly painful struggle he was in. Kyuhyun took a deep breath and ran inside, estimating the time he had to safely escape to his room and lock the door before Eunhyuk would have time to run the stairs down.

The commercials break in again. Kyuhyun sighs and calms down his pounding heart by reminding of how even that one sweet Christmas had been broken down to pieces. The insides of that bag never found themselves to Eunhyuk’s hands. It had been the first and last Christmas gift Kyuhyun had ever bought for his boyfriend. The Christmas spirit was a fictional invention by American movie makers.

A delicious cake advert on the TV reminds Kyuhyun of the time and of his hunger. He glances behind his shoulder, wiping the bagel crumbs from around his mouth to his sleeve. Donghae’s still gone: the man promised to be back by twelve but there is no sight of him. When he’d be back, they agreed to cook together.

There’s no reason to grief, Kyuhyun reminds himself quickly. I have to enjoy the Christmas with what I have, he nods determinedly - like to give himself a permission - and tiptoes in the kitchen to grab another bagel from Donghae’s fridge.

Just when Kyuhyun reaches the sofa again, a lousy theme park commercial changes to a familiar, annoying high tune. Even as a veteran idol, seeing oneself in the TV is just as confusing. Kyuhyun finds himself staring at his own eyes.

“This is like centuries old! How can they still - “

Yes, no doubt of that: in the horribly colourful Christmas jumper advertisement Kyuhyun witnesses himself smiling like a freak against a red background, pretending to have a good time with his groupmates. Leeteuk is wearing a cringeworthy pink sweater. There is such a cheesy close-up of Ryeowook’s face that Kyuhyun cannot help but spit out the piece of bagel from his mouth.

“This is...horrendous... “

Kyuhyun chuckles, dropping on his knees on the floor after the bagel and observing the screen from close distance. He finds himself hiding behind his fingers as Donghae approaches the screen with such a cheesy smile on his face that there’s nothing to compare.  

And all of a sudden Eunhyuk’s face intrudes the entire screen. The man smiles, raises his hand and a lousy, yellow price tag appears on his hand. The familiar, squeaky voice fills the living room when Eunhyuk states out the slogan of the company they were advertising for. He laughs, and a close-up of Kyuhyun and Donghae running to him, hugging him floats in and -

The screen is turned off. Kyuhyun breathes out strongly and sets the remote control back on the table while trying to get the image out of his eyes. No. Just no. No Eunhyuk for now.

“Umm...good day, hyung.”

A wobbly voice states from the doorway. Kyuhyun turns around, getting up from the floor awkwardly and pretending he was acting like a normal person. He swallows the last piece of bagel from his mouth, glancing quickly at the messy pile of pillows and blankets he has left around the living room during his lonely hours.

“Good day, Sehun.”

Sehun is standing on the doorway in his winter coat and ugly beanie, glaring at Kyuhyun confusedly over the huge cardboard box he is holding in his hands. Kyuhyun gulps and hurries to help Sehun. They move the box to hide in the corner of the room - it gives out a suspicious jingle as it hits the floor.

“What is that?”

Kyuhyun asks curiously, trying to peek in just to realise the box is carefully sealed. Sehun smiles shyly, grabbing a blanket from the floor and throwing it over the box.

“It’s for Donghae. From me. For Christmas.”

“Do you think he won’t notice it with the blanket on?”

Kyuhyun cannot help but point out: the huge box isn’t exactly invisible against the white wall - especially with the multicoloured patterned blanket suspiciously thrown on it. But Sehun nods seriously, taking off his beanie and shuffling his hair with both hands.

“Paying attention to detail is not his novelty.”

Their eyes meet. Kyuhyun estimates the younger one’s face curiously, surprised of his ability to actually come up with something as mischievous about his boyfriend. Sehun almost cracks into a playful smile, and Kyuhyun is ready to re-evaluate his previous, rather dull impression of him. But in a snap of a finger Sehun suddenly becomes awkward again. It was like he’d suddenly woken up from a weird dream and realised the other person was actually there, standing in front of him in his scary pyjama pants and loose t-shirt messed up with bagel crumbles. Sehun gulps and is about to say something but backs off awkwardly, about to walk to the bedroom but turning on his heels and murmuring something hastily before disappearing in the kitchen. Kyuhyun never understood how after all the time they had spent around each other Sehun succeeded in failing socially. Every single time.

Kyuhyun walks back on the sofa, grabbing the rest of the blankets from the floor and throwing them over the gift box just in case. Now - at least - it looked like a messy pile of blankets.

There is no sight of Donghae - the man is almost good two hours late. He seems to have got stuck into Christmas traffic: the eve is tomorrow so it wouldn’t be unusual. Sehun and Kyuhyun are sitting on the sofa, side by side, absentmindedly following another Christmas-y romantic comedy. The empty bag of bagels lies guiltily between them, and Kyuhyun derives secret happiness from the fact he doesn’t have to claim to have eaten all of it alone.

“Are you kidding me? You’ve never tasted a bagel?”

Eunhyuk shaked his head, trying to hide his blush when Kyuhyun kept on staring at him like he’d just revealed he’s from another planet. He glanced at the piece of bread in his hands again, bringing it to his nose and laughing while shaking his head. Kyuhyun - who was too excited to even give a glance at his own bagel - cracked into a loud laughter.

“How is it even possible? In my family, we used to eat these not just on Christmas, but all around the year! Never? Really? How come?”

Eunhyuk shrugged his shoulders, smiling and stuffing the rest of the bagel in his mouth and munching it happily while Kyuhyun couldn’t get his eyes off of him. They were standing in middle of a crowded market place, waiting for their hyungs to come pick them up after finishing their schedules. They were supposed to wait inside the cafe nearby, but the delicious scent of warm, fresh food had lured them back to the cold December air.  Or, it had lured Kyuhyun, and Eunhyuk had had no heart to say no.

“We used to eat sponge ca - “

“Hyuk! Look!”

Kyuhyun interrupted and grabbed Eunhyuk’s arm excitedly, pointing at the colourful collection of fudges in the next booth. A group of middle-aged ladies a few metres apart from them started whispering curiously, and the words “idol” and “Super Junior” flew to their ears. Reluctantly, Eunhyuk unwrapped Kyuhyun’s fingers from around his arm and gave the ladies a wide smile.

“Kyu, we already had food from three different booths.”

Eunhyuk reminded patiently when following Kyuhyun closer to the fudges, not forgetting to bow humbly at the ladies who giggled and shyly disappeared in the crowd. Kyuhyun was too blind to even pay attention to such things: he was already listing the flavours he wanted to taste outloud and the man inside the booth was stuffing the little cubes inside a bag with a happy grin on his face.

“Please…?”

Kyuhyun mouthed when he felt Eunhyuk’s judging stare on his shoulder. He turned to look at the man, smiling so brightly and looking so excited that Eunhyuk couldn’t help but roll his eyes and start choosing flavours.

The fudges had ended up being the best damn fudges the two of them had ever tasted. Kyuhyun had tried to find that salesman again, without success. No fudge after that quite rose to that level.

Kyuhyun sighs impatiently. The commercials are breaking in again, and he wishes over everything that the same terrible jumper advert would not flash on the screen. It wasn’t something to be proud of in particular.

“What exactly is inside the box?”

Kyuhyun sighs out to break the uncomfortable silence that has lied over the room for way too long. He glances at Sehun, who has been scrolling down his Instagram feed for the entire time. The boy hums by himself, putting down his phone reluctantly when realising the older one is up for a conversation. A typical teenager, thinks Kyuhyun who is still struggling to find a way to like Sehun despite trying very hard to do so.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, hyung.”

Sehun lisps out very uncomfortably, glancing Kyuhyun from the corner of his eye. Kyuhyun raises his eyebrows, eager to hear an interesting story or a funny set of events but is disappointed to see how Sehun abandons the conversation for the sake of answering a message. Again.

“Is it Donghae?”

“Yes. He’s here in a minute.”

Both of them sigh in relief. Their quality time together would finally come to an end.

Donghae has been grocery shopping - now that he has guests he felt keen on preparing a very, very effortful dinner for the three of them. Despite Sehun’s efforts of telling Donghae that maybe, just maybe, they can save some of the numerous recipes Donghae came up while stuffing food in his cart for later but there was nothing to stop Donghae when he gets the apron wrapped around his waist.

“It’s nothing - and I have you two to help me.”

Sehun and Kyuhyun exchange quick, desperate glances, feeling sorry for each other.

They are all working in the kitchen with cheerful Christmas music playing on the background. Kyuhyun is alone sitting on a chair, peeling the potatoes, slowly dropping the ready ones inside a huge pan. The pile of potato skins on the table starts to look pretty impressive. Sehun, whose task was to chop the meat into pieces, is trying to fry them on the pan. When he drops the pieces in the seething hot butter, he gets some on his finger and gives out a pathetic little whine. Donghae hurries to embrace him from the other side of the room - on the immediate second he realises his little prince might have got hurt. Sehun pouts and gives his finger to Donghae’s worried hands.

A little drop of hot butter can’t hurt that much, Kyuhyun thinks annoyedly when dropping the last potato into the pan. It’s full now. He can’t stop observing how lovingly Donghae kisses Sehun’s finger, and grabs the boy’s waist protectively when he pours the rest of the pieces onto the pan. They’re speaking quietly, their words becoming mumbled under the Christmas music, but Donghae is looking up to Sehun very often, perhaps just to see his face. When Sehun says something, Donghae’s eyes widen as he looks at him and a cheesy smile escapes his lips - a smile that defeats even the cheesy smile he had in the horrible Christmas jumper advert - and he sighs happily when placing a quick kiss on Sehun's cheek. He's madly in love and it's so obvious. Kyuhyun smiles and shakes his head.

“You would never dare to kiss me in front of the hyungs, right?”

Kyuhyun whispered, hiding his face under the blanket and escaping from the tickles that Eunhyuk would eventually give him as a punishment for bringing up such ridiculous questions. But there were no tickles, just a deathly serious answer that echoed in the quiet bedroom.

“Of course I’d dare.”

Eunhyuk claimed in a rather loud volume. He sounded almost hurt of being accused of cowardness. They both held their breaths for a while, listening around the dorm whether anyone seemed to have woken up. No sounds. Kyuhyun felt how Eunhyuk turned around under the sheets, staring at Kyuhyun in the dark. Too bad he couldn’t see anything - both because of the darkness and the blanket that was covering Kyuhyun’s entire body.

“Why wouldn’t I dare?”

“You never do.”

Kyuhyun whispered. He was smiling, he was saying these things just out of curiousity, but the words were nevertheless true. Eunhyuk was very, very careful. The opinion of others always climbed on top of his will to be affectionate towards his boyfriend. Everyone knew they were together, yet barely anyone saw them even touch each other. No one knew Eunhyuk sneaked into Kyuhyun’s room night after night. Why was it so difficult for Eunhyuk to admit their love to others?

All of a sudden the blanket was pulled from Kyuhyun’s body and the cold air floated in. Eunhyuk’s fingers were glued to his sides, under his shirt, and the merciless tickles were there. Kyuhyun stuffed his face in the pillow, trying not to giggle aloud and wake everyone up.

“Don’t say such things, Kyuhyun. Why are you saying such things?”

Eunhyuk leaned down to whisper in Kyuhyun’s ear, making him even ticklier. He chuckled when Kyuhyun made a weird squeal and let his fingers relax on the younger one’s sides, setting himself to lie behind him. Kyuhyun pulled Eunhyuk’s arms closer around himself, trying to find a comfortable sleeping position. He felt how Eunhyuk was still tense. He had been deeply affected by hearing those words.

“Don’t underestimate me.”

Eunhyuk finally whispered out one more time as a challenge, Kyuhyun nodding and turning into a satisfied smile. He fell asleep happily, knowing that tomorrow the hyungs would have a lot to endure on breakfast.

“The potatoes are ready”.

Kyuhyun clears his throat awkwardly when realising the cuddle moment between Donghae and Sehun would not face a natural end. Donghae turns around, looking confused like he’d wondered why there were more people in this house. Kyuhyun stands up, handing the pan to the man.

“I don’t know what to do with them. Can I have a quick break? My fingers are having a cramp.”

“T-thanks, Kyu. Of course. They’re lovely.”

Donghae mutters, looking up to Kyuhyun apologetically - he might have actually forgotten that the man was there. But Kyuhyun smiles at him warmly.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be gone by tomorrow and leave you lovebirds alone.”

“No, Kyu, you can stay as long as you want, I’ll - “

Kyuhyun gives Donghae a meaningful glance and pats his shoulder, making the other one stop his words. There was no way he would bother these two on Christmas: it was their first Christmas together and the first one was always the sweetest. And these two deserved it. Eventually, something would come up and the next Christmas wouldn’t be as sweet. Something always comes up. One year would be a long time - who knows if Sehun and Donghae would love each other a year from now? Kyuhyun couldn’t help but wonder what would become the end of this love story, what would turn it from a light romance novel to an ancient tragedy. Would Sehun get bored of Donghae? Would Donghae get enough of pampering the needy prince? Would one of them cheat on another? Would one of them start seeing things, becoming horribly jealous of everything the other one does and slowly making their lives a living hell?

“Victoria asked me to sing in this Christmas charity choir tomorrow night. I promised her I’d be coming.”

“Are you sure it’s fine? Because you can really stay here if you want.”

“No. I’m fine.”

Kyuhyun nods one more time. Donghae looks doubtful, he looks worried but he nods back.

As walking away from the kitchen, Kyuhyun cannot help but feel a tiny, tiny bit melancholic. As much as there have been fights, as many horrible Christmas nights he has cried alone in his bed before because of the very same person, this is the first Christmas he would actually spend on his own. There was no Victoria. Victoria was in China. Victoria was an excuse.

Kyuhyun stops and leans against the wall right after he’s out of sight. It feels like his heart is pounding slowly, like it’d be losing energy to keep on pumping anymore. It feels like his palms were sweaty, his head was dizzy and there’d be an endless hum in his ears. And he knew exactly that these were the symptoms of his ridiculous need to get back to the person that kept on hurting him.

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A/N: I just want to clear up one thing: I know nothing of Korean Christmas traditions xD Think of this as a misplaced description of the Finnish/British traditions I know of! :'D