´You know...´ Bang sighed as he looked at his childhood friend ´life doesnt go always as you want´. He wanted to comfort the younger, really wanted, but didnt make any movement to do so, he stayed on his spot just smiling sadly.

Both were in their shared room, one siting on the bed and other on a chair right in front of it.

´H-how can-can you say it like tha---´ Youngjae whined as he tried to breath but the tears that streamed down his cheeks werent stoping, nor did his cries. He tried to wipe them away with the palm of his hands but it was useless ´i c-cant´

Yongguks heart ached at the sight. This is the image he didnt want to see.. Those eyes should sparkle from excitement, those lips should be smiling showing pearly white teeth while lauhing. Right now they were red and puffy from crying and lips swollen from biting them, cheeks red and wet from tears.

´Jae.. I´ the older got up from the chair and put his hand on Youngjaes head, his fingers ruffling the hair very gently, trying to calm the boy down with this simple touch. Yongguk felt how the younger leaned into his hand, but the sobs only increased ´y-you pi-pity me...as always. im s-so weak and pathetic´

Youngjae looked up with his deer-like eyes and Bang flinched, his lips parting slightly. The expression was so sincere and broken at the same time, it send chills down his spine.

´I was so n-naive, right?´ Jae asked through deep breaths he took ´you w-warned me so many ti-times but i was so...so stuborn´ he lifted his one hand and put it on top of Bangs, that slid down now to cup the youngers cheek ´you always protected me...since we were little kids´

Yongguk started uncounsly to cares Jaes cheek with his thumb and listened to him.

´He was just using me....you warned me yet i...i-i was so ignorant. Now its my punishment´

Reaching for the boy, Yongguk took his face in both his hands and smiled ´but thats the beauty of life. You have up and downs, but it just makes you stronger and more experienced. I know it hurts....but it was your decision and you learned from it. Or didnt you?´

Jae snorted and bit again his s making it bleed slightly ´of course..i wont fall in love, never again´

The olders body froze from those words and eyes widened ´w-what?´

´Im so tired ....i-i feel like a total looser hyung´ the lost tears appeared again in Jaes eyes and he hugged himself ´i-it hurts so much! I-i dont want this feeling!!´ he lost strenght and collapsed on his back on the bed, covering his eyes with his arm.

There was silence in the whole apartment now, only loud noises of crying was heard and heavy breathing that belonged to Youngjae. The boy was so heartbroken that he let all his sorrow out all once.

The older fellt a huge stone in his troath, he couldnt swallow as his body started to tremble. There was no way this would end like this.

´y-you wont fall in love?´

Jae stayed hidden so he couldnt see the sad look the other gave him and nodded ´n-no. It hurts.... there is nothing like love. It doesnt exist´

Yongguks hands formed into fists and his brows furrowed ´dont say that. Please..´ he got closer to the bed and crawled on top of it on his knees.

Jae lifted his arm and noticed his hyung kneeling just inches away from him, but what caught his attention were those ...tears? Was Yongguk crying?! The younger sat up in the speed of light and got on his four closer just like a cat ´H-hyung? What-  Whats wrong?!´

Bang didnt waist time, he cupped the boys face again and pulled him against him, so that their foreheads were touching. Jaes cheeks turned crimson red as he felt the olders breath tickling his own skin. He noticed as well the faint pink blush on his tan skin.

´Y-Yongguk.. h-hyung?´

Yongguks eyes were closed, but he felt the boys stare on him. He just couldnt bear the situation anymore. Not to what it escalated. ´dont say it please...just dont´

Jae was confused and blinked numerous times ´what i--´

´that you dont believe in love´ his eyes opened and the younger gasped as he leaned so close their lips almost touched, but yet they didnt.

Youngjae felt like paralized, his body was like a statue, not able to move. He could have said something, he could throw the older away from him or even shout at him. Yet he didnt do any of it.

´What im confident to say is...´Bangs eyes were trapping him with what seemed like magic and Jae could only stare into them with his own wide ones ´that i believe in love´

Jaes lips parted and it caused to touch Yongguks gently, not kissing, that was not a kiss yet.

´Why?´ he asked in a whisper his eyes now falling down to Bangs lips, somehow he managed to calm himself down, as he was not a crying mess like before. This atmosphere felt so right and calming.

´Because i love you´

Those words came out so naturaly and immediately after the boys question. The answer was confident and sincere.

Jae felt it. The pain in his heart and his stomach. It was this feeling he was scared of. He said he didnt believe in love anymore, and yet here he was having butterflies in his stomach.

Yongguks arms sneaked to the youngers waist pulling him closer to him. He leaned in and gave Youngjae a gentle kiss, very gently moving his lips showing his feelings.

Jae wasnt resisting and slowly but for sure, he returned the kiss while new tears rolled down his cheeks. He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms arround the olders neck. Opening his mouth he gave out a whine and started to cry again into the kiss that deepened at this point. Yongguk pulled the boy onto his lap, legs on each side of his hips. One hand was on Jaes waist and the second on the back of his neck pulling him closer, if it was even possible.

As they parted both were panting for air. Youngjae felt the world arround spining and he had to lean his head down on Bangs shoulder for support, closing his eyes.

Yongguk on the other hand felt scared after what he did, so he started to cares the others back with gentle ´J-jae i..im really sorry about what happened to you. I tried-I really tried to tolerate this relationships you had but...´ he hugged the boy tightly, burrying his head in the crock of his neck ´but i cant now ignore the fact that you are not happy´ he inhaled the oh so sweet scent that was Youngjae and sighed, waiting for a reaction to his confession.

Youngjae felt shiver on his whole body. The way Yongguk was holding him. He felt protected and warm. Honestly he liked this feeling.

´I-i ´ Jae turned his head to side and whispered directly into Bangs ear ´i never felt... in those relationships, there werent moments like how i felt with you´ he snuggled to the olders body and if Yongguk would compare it, it was like a cat purring trying to get attention.

´Each time you touched me, even if it was just a brush of fingers on my skin, my stomach started to hurt. I felt like i couldnt swallow a limp in my troath. I had goosebumps each time you hugged me or you smiled at me´ Jae closed his eyes and let his mind speak. Until now he didnt realize what it could be but this situation started to make sense. It was like the puzzle peaces were put together forming his needed answers.

Yongguks eyes were wide open as he listened to his dongsaengs words. ´Maybe...´Jae released himself slightly from the tight embrace and took Bangs face into his hands ´maybe you were the reason why my relationships ...´ he smiled sadly and Yongguk blinked. He had never seen this look in Youngjaes eyes and he was staring right at him with that expression.

What was it? Affection? Pity or was it really love like Bang hoped?

Jae looked at Yongguks plump lips and traced them gently with his finger finding them fascinating. They were childhood friends but they never got so intimate like they were right now. Yes, they hugged before but this was completely different.

The touch of Yongguk burned his skin, it was like he was set on fire. Just then remembered Jae the words his ex partners said to him.

´Im not the only one on your mind..´

´Your heart doesnt belong to me...not only me Jae´

´You cant expect me to stay with you when im not your world, when im the second one´

Until now the boy didnt get what all those words did mean, but now...he was realizing that his ex-lovers knew his feeling before he actually accepted them. They knew Yongguk was someone special.

The strange shivers he felt when Yongguk just touched him, or how his mind stopped working when he saw that dazzling gummy smile. Truthfully, Jae wasnt long without the older, it felt so natural that when they werent together, one of them found their way to the other.

The protecting behavior Yongguk had in Jaes presence was so natural and comforting, that he never realized how it would feel when the older wasnt there anymore.

What would he do if Bang would got a girlfriend? He havent seen his hyung with anyone till now. But right now he didnt want to think about it.

´Do you really l-love me hyung?´ Jae whispered and bit shyly his lip, but he didnt realize that his eyes lidded and he was practicaly staring at the olders lips without blinking.

Yongguk studied the boy on top of him and he could put 1 + 1 together. Youngjae must have realized his feelings as well. He was just scared to make a move.

So Bang gently touched Jaes chin and lifted his face up so ther eyes met ´i love you since we were kids. I cant think of anyone just you. I...feel really useless at how you are so sad and in pain from those broken relationships that i do---´

He was cut of as Youngjae connected their lips in a passionate kiss wrapping his arms again on the olders neck, not giving him any other choice than to kiss back. And Yongguk did. Their tongues tangled together in heated kisses like they would dissapear the next second.

Jae gave out a high pitched moan and Yongguk growled, the sound making the boys body heat up even more. He moved slightly on top of Bangs lap and that was when fingers burried into his waists skin.

´J-Jae—d-dont´ Yongguks deep voice was even deeper as Youngjae knew it. He was getting arroused very quickly from the innocent movements and from the presence that was Jae himself ´this is t-too soon for you´ he grabbed the youngers neck and pulled their foreheads together, both panting hard to catch air.

´i-i think´ Youngjae smiled as he was looking down at his hyung ´i think i love you too.´

Bang froze on the spot as his eyes widened, his lips parted forming an O.

´I think i have for a longer time...´Jae snuggled their noses together giving an eskimo kiss ´i just didnt realize it...im sorry----yaaaahhh!´ he squeleed almost like a girl when Yongguks whole body launched at him, trapping him underneath his whole weight.

´ahhh yaah! I-i cant bre-breaath!!´ the boy laughed and screamed at the same time, the older clinging to him like a huge heavy bear. But Bang was lauging too, or rather crying from happiness as he hugged Jae so tightly, showing his love.

´i-im so happy Youngjae!´ he whispered sensualy into the youngers ear, making him turn crimson red again ´i love you so much´

Jae gave up to struggle against the power Youngguk had and instead returned the hug, smiling in the proces as tears started to run down his cheeks.

This time, they were tears of a new found happiness. 

gif from: http://halboor.com/young-jae

*yay first chapter. :) i dont honestly know how often i will update because from january im having my last semster at school so it will be hell so im just warning you , but it will be one shots so i wont tease you with unfinished plot .) comments are veryyy welcomed :*