Chocolate; Macaroons- Time Stops.

 

  It's already 4 in the morning. Early in the morning. I can feel the cold breeze behind my neck. There's no one here. At this playground. Well, who would be? Only the sounds of, maybe crickets, fill the atmosphere. I've waited for him since 12 a.m- 4 hours ago. But no sign of him can be seen.  I knew it.  Just like before, he won't come.  It's just me that's so stubborn to wait.   I slowly get up from the see-saw and look around me again for the last time, before I continue my walking home.   It's already months since I hadn't meet him. It's not that we couldn't, we just simply can't.How's he? I don't know. Does he hurts anywhere? I don't know too. I just don't know about him anymore. No matter how long I've waited for him, he just didn't turns up. 

 

***

  I wake up lazily from my bed. It's kinda refreshing to be able to sleep, even for couple hours. Literally, I didn't sleep much since these past months. I don't know if I've turned into insomniac. My eye bags are getting bigger, and the dark circles are getting worse. Even my family and other friends have been worrying about my health. But I couldn't care- I don't want to.   I walk towards my calendar that is placed on my study table. I pick it up and smile when I see the date that has been marked with red marker. It's his birthday. Jungkook's birthday. We've promise to go somewhere on his 18th birthday.    I check today's date and realise that it's only couple days away. I don't have anything yet for him. Perhaps I could get it today. I turn around to get my towel and then my eyes meet with the medium-sized board near my bed.    The board is full with pictures of me with my family, friends.. and him. I walk closer and touch the pictures of me and Jungkook. There are some from our outing, school and also from our childhood.    Yes, I've know him since we were 5. We were neighbors for 13 years...      

 

 

  13 years back then.      "Taehyungggg," I hear someone calls my name from downstairs. I bet it's mom. "Yes Momm," I stop playing with my toys and lazily get up.    "I'll be right back guys! Wait for me," I remind my little friends and close the door behind me before going downstairs. "Yes Mom?" I ask her when I reach the kitchen. "Here, take this. Give it to our new neighbor." My mom gives me a tupperware that is filled with rice cakes. Made by her.    "Ahh mom! Why don't you ask Hoseok hyung for that? I don't know the new neighbor. By the way, I'm still a small kid to do that, right mom?" I make a pity face and plead her.    "No, you have to make friends. For how long are you gonna friends with plastic? You're 5 already, do you want to grow lonely? Plus, you can always talk about your 'little friends' if you have real friends, since you complained about no one listening to your story." Mom try to persuade me.    I keep silent for a moment before finally nod. "That's my little honey! Now go. Remember, smileeee~" Mom demonstrates the smile in front of me. I just pull a forceful smile that makes her laughs.   I reach the tupperware and walk lazily to the front door. I wear my slippers and take peek to my next house. I can see two adults are helping the workers lifting their furnitures. But none of kids. I continue eyeing them until I feel hot breeze behind my neck.     "What you looking at..?"      "AAAAA!!!!" I scream a little- maybe not, after hearing a soft voice next to my ear.   "AAAAAAAAA!!!" But I don't understand why the small creature in front of me is screaming along.   We both then stared at each other for a moment before I finally speak up. "Why were you screaming?!" I ask him furiously. I think this kid is about my age based on his face.    "I don't know. I just follow you along. Hee~" He replies with a wide grin. Huh? What is wrong with him.    "You are weird.. Nah, by he way here you go. My mom asked me to give it to your family. Or, our new neighbor." I reach out my hand to give him the rice cakes without looking at his face.    He quickly opens it and amazed with the content. "Wow!!! Rice cakes!!! Nyummm," Without talking much more, he put two rice cakes in one time into his little mouth. I look at him in disbelief.   "Nyumm, mmoii naeimm ishh jjeunggkeeukk.. Whott ishh yorssh," He says with mouth full of rice cakes. Even his saliva is almost dripping. Bwuekkk. I grim in front of him.    "Huh? I didn't know that you learned alien language. Nevermind, I'll just go." I'm about to leave when he suddenly grabs my arm. I can see he tries hard to swallow those rice cakes in his mouth.    "Erkk.. Ermm.. Pheww. Finally! That is so delicious! Where did you get that? Your mom made it? Oh, by the way, I was telling you my name is Jungkook. And what's yours?" He then reach out his hand for hand shake.   At first, I was about to ignore him and just go back inside. But then I remember what my mom told me. "Erm, will you become my friend if I shake your hand and tell you my name?" I ask him shyly.    "Hah? Of course! Why not! Yeay!! Finally I've got a new friend!! Wait here, I'm going to tell my mom and dad about it. Then we can play together... *blablabla*"         End of flashback.  

 

 

  He didn't stop talking after that, only after his mom called him and thanked me for the rice cakes. After that day, I thought I'm going to be living hell with him bothering me. But I was wrong. My life became more bright and cheerful with him by my side. We were so close that even the girls were jealous with us.   But now he's not here with me. Perhaps if I wait for him a little more, he would turn up... right..?    

***

 

  I walk pass my living room and go to the front door. "Where are you going, Taehyung-ah. Are you feeling well now? Do you hungry? I've made lunch." Mom asks me with full of concern.    "Never mind, it's okay Mom. I'm going out for a while. Jungkook's birthday is this Tuesday. Two days more left. I should find something for him now, before he sulks. You know that boy, haha." I let out a small chuckles after saying that. Mom only looks at me with a sympathy look. I smile bitterly and close the door.   I look at his house- next to my house before I continue my walk to the bus stop nearby. After 15 minutes of waiting, I get into the bus and go to the seat that I always sit with Jungkook. I choose to sit next to the window like Jungkook always did.    He never let me sit next to the window because he didn't want me to ignore him while looking outside the window. He usually will sit next to the window and make sure nothing to distract me from him. I smile remembering how he always talking non-stop with me no matter where we were. We always brighten up each other. If he finds me not in a good mood, he will do things to brighten up my mood. And so do I.   This is the first that I sit next to the window, after he's no longer here to prevent it. I look up at the bright and blue sky. I continue looking at it while my mind is drifting away towards Jungkook.      ***     I get off the bus when it arrived. I cross the street and reach in front of the shopping mall's entrance. I pull up my hoodie and walk in. I walk slowly while looking at my surroundings. Then I'm getting nearer with an ice cream shop. Then image of Jungkook and our classmates eating ice cream there after school makes me feel gloomy again. Yet, I still walk towards it and order two ice cream. One of it is Jungkook's favourite.    When I'm about to pay for it, someone nudges me. I turn my face to my left side and find Hyerim- Jungkook's girlfriend. "Hey.." She starts the conversation. I can see the sad look in her face. "Hey.. Alone?" I ask her. She just nods and we both keep silent after that.   After 5 minutes waiting, the cashier gives us our ice cream. "I remember how Jungkook loves this flavour.." She says while staring at the ice cream. "Yeah.. I ordered it too." I smile looking at our ice cream. "It's hard for me.. Very hard. If only I can find the chocolates, the only wish that I want to be granted is, Jungkook back. I want him back..." I can see she tries to hold her tears. Even my eyes are getting watery. I slowly pull her into my embrace and pat her back. "Me too.. Everything is gonna be alright.. He will come back." I whisper in her ears and ignore the stares from people near us. Even though I don't fully understand what she was saying about chocolates or something, but I still convince her that Jungkook will comeback.       ***     I walk alone with two cups of ice cream in my hand. Yes it's melting. But I just couldn't eat it.. When I reach third floor of the mall, I walk aimlessly until my eyes catch an image of a jacket displayed in one of the shops. I slowly walk towards it and remember that, that is the jacket that Jungkook wanted so bad. But he didn't have enough money back then to buy it. Neither did I.   Then I see the promoter puts a discount tag at the jacket. I walk inside the shop and place the cups of ice creams on the coffee table nearby. I touch the jacket and take it off from the mannequin. The promoter approaches me and explain about the discount. Her words sound like a foreign language. All that I think about right now is Jungkook, Jungkook's jacket, Jungkook's birthday and all about Jungkook.    "Sir? Are you listening?" The promoter asks and waves her hand in front of my face. That makes me snap back to reality. "Huh? Aa yes. I want this jacket." Without saying much, I follow her to make the payment. I even ask them to wrap it nicely with a birthday card written by me sticked to it.       ***     It's already 11.17 p.m. Another 43 minutes, then it's going to be 12.00 a.m- 1 September, Jungkook's birthday. I take the gift that I bought and go downstairs. I close the front door and go to Jungkook's house which is only on my right side.    I knocked for several times before someone opens it up. It's Jungkook's mom. "Hi, sorry to disturb you by this hour. But is Jungkook already home?" I ask her brightly but she replies it with a watery eyes. "N-no Taehyung-ah.."   "Oh... Never mind. I'll go first. But if he's back, can you please tell him that I'll wait for him at the mountain first." I then waves her goodbye before I go to the mountain.        ***     I look at my watch and find it's already 12.11 a.m. I'm late for 11 minutes. I hope Jungkook isn't here yet. I don't want him to wait. I find a spot to sit and then I place the present next to me. Sky is getting darker with no stars. As if it's about to rain. But the lights from those streets down there kinda lighten up this mellow night.    We promise to go here on Jungkook's birthday. He said, he wants to spend some times with his bestfriend looking at this beautiful scenery on his 18th birthday. I smile remembering that.    After minutes of waiting, my eyelids are getting heavier, and then everything goes black..       ***     I wake up from my nap when I feel something on my face. Then I realise that it's already raining. I quickly reach the present and hide it in my hoodie. I check my watch and find it's 2.23 a.m. I still don't get up, still sitting there while hugging my knees instead.  I hope the present wouldn't get wet.      Just, where are you Jungkook? Are you mad at me for not helping you that time? But I'm sorry. I was hurt too. Please come back, it's cold here...        Then I hear voices calling my name. But I'm too cold that even my lips aren't able to move properly. It keep stuttering.   After some moment, the voices are getting louder. Then I feel someone touches my shoulder and I can see a flashlight directed on me. "Oh my god Taehyung! Why are you here? Why did you do this??" I think it's my mom. She hugs me tight and I can hear her crying voice as she is so close to me. I couldn't hear what the others are saying as the rain sound plus my mom's are loud enough.    "No, it's okay mom, guys. I just come here to wait for Jungkook. We promised to be here on his 18th birthday, which is today. But I don't know what takes him so long! Oh yes!  Hoseok hyung," I slowly get up from my mom's embrace.    "Can you please hold it for a while. Because, you know, I'm already hell wet right now. I don't want that to be we-" I can't finish my words when I feel a hard pang on my left cheek. My head was turned to right as the force of the slap is to strong for me right now. I then slowly turn my he