F I N A L E

Kyungsoo dreams; he pictures the past, captures the present and imagines the future. He is a born dreamer.

 

His daily routine, however, is disrupted when he turns sixteen. He still dreams, day and night building imaginary castles in the sky, but his little euphoria is no longer characterless.

 

Kyungsoo used to dream of birds and skies when the sun sets over the horizon and maybe the night skyline of Paris which he longed to visit. All of his daydreams are painted with non-living objects and articles. Never in a lifetime has a breathing being intruded his mind and Kyungsoo is beyond curious.

 

He first sees the intruder when he falls into the abyss of sleep after pulling an all-nighter for the finals. Kyungsoo unravels the stranger from the back. Uninvited, the tall male sits himself on the large boulder along the secluded shoreline.

 

It takes him a few moments before he swivels his head around to meet Kyungsoo in the eyes. It leaves the latter breathless. Full bloom lips, burnt sienna skin, toned arms and chiseled jaws, Kyungsoo finds himself lost in the depths of the dull obsidian black orbs. "Hey."

 

The tanned male's voice is shallow and subtle lulling Kyungsoo's conscious mind into a trance. "Ummn...Hi?" There is no formal introduction when the stranger grabs him by the wrist and runs towards the shore overseeing the cerulean ocean where waves dive and crash. "Call me Kai."

 

"Kyungsoo. Do Kyungsoo." The petite male exchanges shyly cheeks flaring up a bit. Kyungsoo can hear the soft laughter bubbling against the other's chest as they lay down on the meadows midst the dandelions and fireflies. The sun has long set into the west leaving the sky in the hands of twilight.

 

Kyungsoo is soon rocked to sleep with Kai's gentle breathing singing by his side compelling him to close his eyes once more. The last thing he can hear is the backwash of the tide against the white sand scattered along the bay. "Goodnight, Kyungsoo."

 

The next encounter is somewhere on the rooftop of an abandoned school building. Kai, the stranger, is donned in a leather jacket and a pair of black slacks with hair pushed back in a model style. Kyungsoo takes note of how his hair colour has evolved from a lustrous raven shade to a hue of chiffon avalanche.

 

"Looks like we'll be meeting each other often." The olive skin man muses as he puffs out dissipating strands of smoke. He seems like an addicted smoker trapped in chains of tobacco and nicotine.

 

"You should quit. It's bad for your health." Kyungsoo chides almost inaudibly albeit knowing it is none of his concern.

 

Within seconds, the cigarette is tossed on the ground before left as a stranded mess of ashes crumbling under the pressure of the heels of the combat boots. "Come, I wanna show you something."

 

With that, Kyungsoo finds himself in front of mirrors studded into the cramped walls of the studio. He stares into the faint outline of Kai's smirk as the latter breathes himself into life.

 

The starting steps of flawless footwork and smooth fluidity gradually thread the choreography into a state of defined perfection. Kai is no doubt ethereal.

 

To say Kyungsoo is unlikely impressed would be a suppressed lie. He is mesmerized and enthralled by every step of the dance.

 

Kai shuffles, twists and turns carving his beautiful body into meticulous artwork of movements. However, something about the way Kai illustrates himself sets him apart from others. He is human.

 

Kyungsoo has seen countless dance performances by famous artists on TV yet none of them has managed to achieve the aura Kai radiates. Kai dances like a human. A real human.

 

"How do you do that?" Kyungsoo asks out of curiosity when Kai comes down from his thrill and slumps down next to him leaning against the wall.

 

"What do you mean?" Kai probes him for more details and Kyungsoo complies rephrasing into a proper sentence. "The emotions. How? How did you dance them?"

 

"Instinct. Trust it and let it go." Kai answers nonchalantly and Kyungsoo cannot help but notice the way their shoulders are brushed against each other. The perks of being in confined space, he thinks. "Believe me, it works."

 

The different universes die and reincarnate and Kyungsoo himself arrives in each time acquainting Kai over and over again. This time, he drops by as a bar singer on a lonely Saturday night. Drunk singles fill the voids of the dingy bar as they sell their sorrowful stories on failed relationships and lack of company.

 

 

"Oceans apart,

day after day,

and I slowly go insane"

 

 

Kyungsoo tries to ignore the lustful stares of the clients as they coo and throw appalling winks in his direction.

 

Looking over the microphone where his saccharine voice is transmitted into, the fair male squints into the outlines of the dark and sees a familiar upturn of lips over the glass of vodka. "Kai."

 

 

"Wherever you go,

whatever you do,

I will be right here waiting for you,

whatever it takes,

or how my heart breaks,

I will be right here waiting for you..."

 

 

The taste of Kai's lips burns in the back of his mind, imprinted on his very heart. It is luring and pernicious; Kyungsoo knows he is risking his life over the line. He, however, does not mind.

 

Kai keeps his insanity sane when the sinful tongue across the seam of his flesh the air out of the warm cavern and Kyungsoo cannot help but moans in pleasure. The bitter taste of alcohol is mind consuming and addictive; Kyungsoo cannot seem to quit.

 

It is comforting how Kai's warmth engulfs him back into his dreamless sleep drowning in the sweet nothings whispered from the former's mouth. Kyungsoo wakes up with a sore bottom.

 

Unpleasant as it sounds, Kai discovers his little secret in their next rendezvous. "Disgusting, isn't it?" Kyungsoo stresses the words in broken sobs; Kai, to his relief, holds him near his chest cradling his head in his ginger hands. "No, they're beautiful."

 

Kyungsoo loves the way his body reacts under the other's lingering feather-like touches treating him as if he is the world's most fragile china. Kai traces every scars carved on Kyungsoo's alabaster skin where imperfections sketch themselves into ugly outlines. "Just don't do it again. Please."

 

He finds himself nodding to the stern syllabuses cascading out of the stranger's mouth. It feels warm soothing his cuts and wounds. Kai is his cure. He is sure.

 

It is not long the very next day Kyungsoo releases himself from his shell; pen knives and razor blades are dumped down the rubbish chute as Kyungsoo bids farewell to his past solace. He has Kai now. And nothing else matters anymore.

 

It is an another rainy afternoon in Seoul. The drizzling of monsoon rain plays an assuring melody in Kyungsoo's ears as the diminutive male scurries around the house in a loose cardigan with a pair of boxers on.

 

Kai has been missing for a few days now. Kyungsoo's dreams are no longer special as they used to be.

 

He decides to to take a short nap huddling himself close in his own arms beneath the cocoon of the blankets. He hopes to see Kai. There are a lot of things left unanswered.

 

So he does. Kai comes around in a casual wear with a red hoodie zipped up to his face with bangs wet and stuck onto his forehead and beneath it hides a hooded gaze. It is raining in the universe too. And Kyungsoo thinks it is too surreal.

 

"I've good news," Kyungsoo his chapped lips looking up at the younger male. Kai raises an eyebrow in demanding curiosity. Both no longer need words to convey their thinking. "Okay." Kai nods slowly lips smacking each other.

 

Kyungsoo pauses for a brief moment before he delivers his excitement. "I got into SM. Official trainee tomorrow." Kai stares at him for a while with intense eyes trailing down his features. "Good to know. Congrats."

 

Awkward, silence clouds in the air and Kyungsoo can smell tension building in the atmosphere. "Thanks." He is utterly crestfallen but plans not to say it out. It is a part of Kai's personality. He reassures but the doubts are surrounding and he unfortunately succumbs. "So how have you been?"

 

Heartbreaking message wiggles itself into Kyungsoo's memory and stretches the thorns out slowly. He glances at Kai only to see the boy with his head down refusing to look into his eyes. "You're leaving, huh?"

 

Kai nods faintly still not looking up. "Yeah." He has his hands in pockets and Kyungsoo refrains himself from searching for those warm fingers to lace his ones with. "For real?"

 

The male does not answer but envelopes him into a tight secure embrace hands circling his sensitive nape and wrapping around his slender waist and Kyungsoo decides to just nuzzle ever so close into the crook of Kai's neck. Farewell is inevitable; it hurts.

 

Heart scraped and eyes swollen, Kai seems to have forgotten to at least offer him a bandage. Kai has become his insanity and pain. He is no longer the healing source for Kyungsoo to take advantage of. "So long, Kai."

 

"Do Kyungsoo?" He wakes up to an air conditioned environment. The bespectacled lady calls on him again and Kyungsoo drags his way to the waiting area. "Here."

 

She is indeed annoyed but Kyungsoo cannot help it. He has just experienced a breakup and the agony is imminent as remnants. To think of it, Kai is not even his lover in the first place. Their relationship is anything but labelled. And their encounters are nothing but a dream.

 

He excuses himself to the washroom out of discomfort. The woman gives him a look of impatience but Kyungsoo is too occupied on his mind to care. "You've five minutes. The producers are waiting."

 

"Hey, easy there buddy."

 

Ears pricked, Kyungsoo gazes up. The thick voice rings in his mind and his stomach churns at the very sight of his savior.

 

"Thank god for not implanting your face onto the tiles." He jokes offering a hand to which Kyungsoo reluctantly grabs a hold of. "Jongin. Kim Jongin."

 

Full bloom lips, burnt sienna skin, toned arms and chiseled jaws, Kyungsoo finds himself lost in the depths of the dull obsidian black orbs. His smile is still dazzling as ever.

 

"Do Kyungsoo here." He introduces but somewhere in his mind, he knows.

 

Found you...

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I took for granted, all the times
That I thought would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me going crazy


I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me going crazy

Wherever you go,

whatever you do,

I will be right here waiting for you,

whatever it takes,

or how my heart breaks,

I will be right here waiting for you.."

 

 

 

 

缘分。。。你相信吗？

Do you believe in fate?