Jessica’s POV

“Jessica?”

That voice was too familiar to my liking that my heart started to beat faster than it should. I tried my best to be in denial of the voice but I can’t. It’s too painful that make it hard to forget what used to happen.

“Jessica, is that you?”

That voice again.

“Unnie,” Krystal whispered softly.

“It’s okay, Krys. I know it’s him,” I smiled, “Could you kindly guide me to him?”

“Are you sure, unnie? We could just go, you know?” Krystal asked while hesitating to guide me to him.

“Krystal, I’m sure. Come on, guide me,” I chuckled while looking for my stick to stand up.

Krystal then guided me to him and when we stopped, he greeted me, “Hi.”

I turned to Krystal and asked her to leave me with him for a while and Krystal obeyed but I could feel that she’s sitting at the table next to us. I ignored her and greeted him, ‘Hi’ as well.

We both sat down. I know by the sound of the chair.

There was a pure silence for the first couple of minutes before I decided to ask him, “How are you?”

He coughed and replied, “Uhhmmmm… Okay, I guess. I just got my vacation today.”

“I see,” I replied shortly.

“What about you? How are you?” he asked back.

“Never been better,” I smiled answering his question.

“I see,” he replied softly.

There’s another moment of silence before I intruded saying, “You must be curious of what happened after that, aren’t you?”

“Well… I don’t know how to start. I’m really sorry for what happened before, Jessica. I really do,” Soonkyu said.

He was sincere. I knew it. No, I could even felt the sincerity in his voice.

“It’s okay, it’s the past anyway. I’ve long forgotten about it and I’m okay with it,” I replied smiling, “Oh! I’d forgave you long time ago. It’s just that time never really were on our side to see each other.”

He laughed a little. I missed that laughter of his.

“What really happened after that? Do you mind?” he was slowly warming up to our conversation.

“You wouldn’t believe it even if I tell you about it,” I unconsciously pouted.

“What? You haven’t tell me anything, Jessica. Now come on. Tell me.”

“No, I don’t want to,” I .

“Hands down. I can’t force you to,” he laughed again a little.

“You’re no fun.”

“What? How could you say that? After years of not seeing each other and you said I’m no fun. Really, Jessica Jung?”

I laughed upon hearing him calling me like that. There were certain occasion of him calling me like that.

“I’m just joking, okay? You sure you’re ready to listen to my story? You know? After all these years,” I stopped.

“Yeah, I am,” he replied with his hand unconsciously holding mine and squeezed it lightly. 

I felt at ease at that moment. The feeling that used to ignite still lingered inside me.

“It’s all hard a day after that incident to be honest. I was at lost and didn’t know what to do,” I started.

He loosened his grip on my hand and slowly caressed it instead. He waited for me to continue.

“I thought it’s the end of my live after that,” I chuckled, “I didn’t eat for almost 3 weeks and I pushed everyone aside and isolated myself inside my room. Darkest moment of my live. One day, I thought of ending my live but thank god, Krystal came in time and snapped me back into reality. She’s furious like you don’t even know her at that moment anymore. She gave me a hard slap before we both slumped down and cried together. Then I realised. I realised I’d wasted time crying over things that can’t be change and I realised too that I should move on and so I did. Not to forget that, I’d made so many people worry over me and I pushed them aside just like that. It’s pretty hard to move on at first but eventually, it’s just like we’re restarting our life with the brand new chapter; without sorrow. There, you have my story.”

“You make it sounds like you’re creating the story, you know?” he said and laughed a little.

“You don’t believe my story?” I pouted.

“I didn’t say that though,” he teased.

“Right,” I smiled.

“Are you sure that’s all?” he asked once more.

“Why?”

“I’m curious about… you know… how should I say this?” he hesitated.

“My eyes?” I asked.

There’s a pause before he timidly said a yes.

“Knew it.”

He chuckled nervously.

“I’m not sure how to say this but I could definitely expect that you’re not going to believe what I’m about to say,” I teased.

“What? Come on~,” he puffed, “Seriously? What happened?”

“I donated my eyes to this one little girl,” I said calmly.

There’s no sound after.

“Soonkyu? You there?” I asked when I received no response after few minutes.

“Are you serious, Jessica Jung Sooyeon?” he asked again.

“I’m totally serious,” I replied a bit annoyed.

“You’re kidding, right?” he asked again to make sure.

“What? No! You’d think I bawled my eyes and get blinded by it because of what happened?” I sneered.

“I don’t believe this,” he said.

I heard the sound of his car and it seems like he’s moving. Actually he moved to sit beside me. He held both of my hands gently and whispered, “You’re not serious about it, right? I mean did you really donated your eyes to the kid? Why?”

I huffed, “I’m serious about it, Lee Soonkyu. I was really serious about it. Do you think I like to joke on something like this? If you don’t believe me, you could ask Krystal about what happened.”

I donated my eyes to that kid for a reason.

He let go of my hands and seems to turn to face Krystal and they talked about while leaving me in silence. I could hear them whispered before he finally get back to me and said, “I’m sorry. I’m really really sorry about it. I wish I could be there for you at that time.”

“It’s okay. What’s done is done anyway. Let’s not talk about it anymore,” I said.

“Right,” he agreed.

“Unnie, it’s about time to go now,” Krystal reminded me.

“Really? Give me a minute,” I said.

“It was nice talking to you again after a long time not seeing each other. Well now, not hearing each other is the right one,” I laughed.

He once again held my hands. This time, he squeezed it gently and caressed it. I could almost felt his breath near to my face. He stood so close to me and whispered, “Can we go out again?”

I didn’t answer him but hugged him instead and said, “Bye!”

He let go and I waited for Krystal to come up to me and we went out together. Just before we moved from the table, I managed to say, “Up to you to show your effort to me because remember what I said? I’ve forgiven you long time ago.”

I don’t want to say yes immediately because of what used to happen. I want to feel his effort this time if he’s being real and really can handle me at my worst for times to come.

Life isn’t about rainbow every day, it’s always about a war that we face every day to see if we can get through it no matter if it’s small or big. At the end of the day, we either be grateful or just curse about the luck we had that day, there’s no in between.

Just like love, if you can’t handle it then let it go because someone out there might need him more than I do. We’ll see how it goes after this.

Just as I was near to the door, I heard him shouted a yes. That goof! I smiled and went out with Krystal. It was unexpected but a good lovely day.

 

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Tada~! After a decade, here's the final part. 

I'm barely alive here. X_____X

I think it's kinda short and off but nyeh. hahaha

Happy Winter Break, everyone! :D

 

<3