Chapter 1/2.

Jaejoong…

He was the only person that my eyes lingered on. For almost four month I spent in my masters lectuers, I watched his every move. Each smile and each pout.

And believe it or not, I was lucky enough to be his friend too. At first I thought it was a great opportunity, but the closer I get to him the more I realize that he would be the death of me. Watching him for all this time, I realized one thing. My heart kind of start feeling weird every time I looked at him. Not to mention, each time I sat next to him, I was overjoyed that I nearly fainted. That little crush I had on him grew up to be something massive and uncontrollable, leaving me crying to my pillow every single night. I treasured them though. If it’s for Jae, even the tears are worth it.

He told me about his girlfriend, who had broken up with him more than four times and yet, yet he waited for that girl who crushed him over and over again.

He says that it’s his first love that he can’t let go of.

Is it that hard. She hurts you… and you don’t deserve that Jae… she doesn't deserve you.

He never realized or never noticed, how each of his word, how his love for her cut me so deep.

Sigh. 

I couldn’t do this anymore…

And today, I confessed.

I told him that I love him.

And all he did was smile.

I cornered him after lectures. Asking him if he could give me few minutes … and I let it out.

“I know it’s unreasonable to ask you this when I clearly know that you are straight and all. But, I really wish you would understand me.”

Most awkward beginning.

“You are my friend Yun, you can tell me anything.” He smiled. Reaching my arm and giving a little squeeze of encouragement.

Why don’t you get it Jae… closing my eyes I let the words out with the last bit of air in my lungs.

“I don’t just want to be your friend.”

He froze. My heart too.

“Yun…. I.. I have someone”

I know that already. Dammit, I know.

“Someone who hurts you over and over for no reason. Why  cant you just understand that she’s playing.”  

“yun… don’t talk to her like that”

“Just one day… that’s all I ask.. just one.”  Even I could hear the desperation in my voice.

“Give me a chance, and if you don’t like this, I’ll walk away, I will.. I promise. But don’t just push me away saying you can’t Jae. Not without giving me a chance.”

Unknowingly I had moved more closer to him, trapping him to the wall with my body and … and I could feel his hands on my cheeks, wiping away the wet ugly tears I didn’t even know I had.

“Yun”

“Just once” I sobbed to his hand.

And that’s how he agreed to be with me.

For a day.

As lovers.

Together.

I drove to his place next day evening, and for record I have never noticed that evenings can be this beautiful. I never saw the dark shades of orange that painted the sky. Or maybe I never tried to notice them. But now, everything seems beautiful.

I rolled down the window and let the wind play with my hair. I checked myself again in the mirror. I looked decent.

Few minutes later, I was in front of his apartment picking his bag… and him… leaving the reality behind us.

The ride was awfully quiet, and we both kept it like that. He was thinking, I could see from side how he bites his lip as he always did when something big is going on in his pretty little head.

And I know I’m being selfish here. But still, I want him in my life, and if its only for a day, m gonna make the best out of it.

“Let me take it, I took his backpack that carried his clothes. A little backpack,my heart sank knowing that he would only be with me for one day. “

“Thank you.

“Here. I passed him the keys to my apartment. His eyes looked at me with questions.

“Open it. i want you to open it…

“Why…

“Because I want my wife to open the door for me.

“Yun, I’m a man… and if we are going to be like a couple, shouldn’t it be man’s duty to always open the door for his wife.

“Well.. "

I settled his packpack on my back..

"you just said you are a man. And whatever, its sure is man’s duty to carry her over the threshold."

He gasped when I carried him in my arms, so light. And he adorablay hung on to me as I walked in to the living room.

“Wow”

"Mmmm."

“You have a nice place Yun… and you can put me down now. “

Don’t want to.

“Yun… “

“Ok ok but…”

“I need some time Yun.”

I immediately settled him on the sofa

“Sorry… I didn’t mean to..” I started.

“Hey stop it… we both agreed to do this… its just… I;m … can I take a shower. I had a rou