'It hurts and it shows.' Himchan thought. His eyes then drifted off and fell on her lips. 'And yet she smiles.' 

♦

 Naive things never caught Himchans' eye. He felt rather uncomfortable when she started to cry, and wished she hadn't done that in front of him. If he doesn't look worried, the crowd will think he's heartless.
He asks if she's alright, and she doesn't understand.
He pushes forward the album she placed in front of him after his signature had been signed; and his brows narrow when he notices a faint brush of light skin on her wrist, and a few more, along the length of her arm.
'You cut yourself?' He nearly asked out loud, and their eyes met. Himchan thought of her stupid. He never quite understood people who walked around looking for pain. His face turned sour. 
Then the line moved on; and she placed the album on Yongguks' hands next.
Zelo smiled and asked something in english. She replied too simply. "I'm fine."

♦

Himchan sighed, pulling out the phone from his pocket. He passed it over to the girl who was seated, alone in the hallway out to the parking lot, dabbing at her cheeks with her palms. Her eyes were bloodshot and Himchan worried about the tears upsetting her make-up. Her tears were crystal clear and it puzzled Himchan to think of a girl without makeup on. Her lips however, was touched very faintly with a soft pink color. 
She smiled when she realized he was trying to talk to her. Himchan felt stupid because he wanted to talk to her. He didn't quite see the point of it. Maybe he was trying to be polite. 
"Will you understand if I answer?" She asked. Himchan did, so he nodded. Her lips curled a bit more upwards, and Himchan wondered why she cared to smile so much. It didn't seem to suit her. 
"I'm sorry I started to tear up like that. It must have been uncomfortable." 
Himchan shook his head to motion 'No'. She wiped her wet cheeks again and gave them a pat. "I'm fine now. Thank you, Himchan." She lifted up the phone and held it for Himchan to take. So he did.
"You'd better leave before someone snaps a picture. I don't want to get you in trouble." She chuckled, picking up her bag. She waved goodbye, and repeated a mumble of a thank you. Himchan waited as she walked past him, and took a left turn from the door they faced. 

She was a weird one. 
She knew his name, too. Usually a foreigner fan who knew their names weren't this reserved. She didn't ask for a hug, didn't ask for a picture, and neither did she want to shake his hand.
'Maybe she was doing it for attention.' Himchan thought. He thought back to the gift she handed over to Youngjae and felt quite uncomfortable. 
'Maybe it's because she liked Youngjae and not me.'

♦

Himchan never really expected to see her again. Never did he expect her to talk to him again, either. He wanted her to go back to where ever she came from; but two weeks later she showed up with the CEO and was introduced as sort of choreography star that they will work with for their next music video. Soon enough he started to see her almost everyday. She was passionate about her work, but Himchan knew better behind that smile. He was surprised by how oblivious everyone was to her scars; that sometimes he thought he was thinking too much. She only managed to give everyone a shock when she showed up one day with her hair chopped short like a pixies. When Zelo asked why she got it cut so short; she replied in a chatter of english; which came in too fast for Himchan to understand. It was getting on his nerves how easy Zelo had it.

When he wanted to talk to her; he still passes his phone.