Even at a young age, his father always reminded him that everything in life came with a price. That he must take responsibility for whatever he chooses to say or do. And that if he wants something but doesn't have anything in exchange for it, he has to work hard.

He was 7 years old then, not really understanding what his dad why trying to tell him. It was an age where all he wanted was to play soccer with his cousins and the children of their staff in the palace garden, read the mystery novels his uncle sent from London, and most of all, dance.

He's just turned 20, and he still wants to do those things, maybe even more now. But things have changed, and he learns that growing up and aging comes with a lot more responsibilities. Especially when you're a prince in line for the throne and the crown.

There are several moments in his life when he wishes to have been born normal, without any royal blood. And he thinks that maybe his life would’ve been a lot easier. He would’ve been free to do whatever he wanted. He would’ve been able to move around and not think about what other people would say. But he’d realize that he should be thankful for the life that was given to him instead.

But because he was a prince, he had to give up a lot of things he loved. There was one thing he fought for though, and it’s the thing he couldn't let go of - dancing.

It was definitely not an easy task to convince his parents that allowing him to pursue dancing and letting him study it in college won’t affect his mindset and disturb his focus and preparations for his indefinite coronation. But all the late nights of studying the inter-kingdom relationship manuals on top of his school work and dance rehearsals were all worth it, because he’s already in his 2nd year, and things seem to be going well enough. Or so he thought.

Before allowing him to go to local college, his parents laid out very specific conditions. And one of the many conditions his parents made him agree to was that he had to conceal his identity from the other students to avoid any unwanted situations security and risks. For Jongin, this meant having to find the perfect balance between being friendly and mysterious. So he involves himself in random conversations, he mostly listens and doesn’t participate much in the sharing. He has a couple of friends too, and they’re the people he spends lunch breaks with. But he keeps his distance still. He does his best to avoid any circumstances where he has to talk about his life, because he isn’t a good liar and as much as possible, he wants to avoid it. Because to him, once a person lies once, it slowly turns into a habit. And as much as possible, he wants to be an honest person, so at some point he can be an honest king. However, he couldn’t simply isolate himself, because being an outcast will also bring him unwanted attention. So far, there hasn’t been any major mishaps. There were times when he slipped up a bit (saying palace instead of house), but otherwise, things have been good.

There was another condition that made his life difficult though. His parents reminded him to avoid standing out at all costs. They specifically told him that he should not dance the way he dances in the makeshift dance room in the palace. Both his parents are very much aware that he is a very passionate dancer. When he was 10 years old, his private instructor had praised him generously, even going as far as saying that he danced better than most professionals. His parents let it pass then, but seeing that a professional and award-winning dancer had seen something in him meant that other people would take even more notice.

It’s a pain, if he were to be completely honest. Considering his competitive nature, the situations frustrates him a lot. He wants to be the best, but he’s not allowed to. Sure, he still manages to be praised, but it’s different. Very different, knowing that there’s so much more he can do.
Not a single person in the entire university has seen him dance the way he could. The way he should. The way he wants to. If he wanted to let off some of the energy, he goes to the basement of the performing arts building and locks himself in one of its mirrored rooms. It’s his safe haven in the university. When the intense feeling in his chest can’t wait ‘til he gets home, he goes there. It’s not that big of a room, and some parts of the floor are already damaged. But he feels safe somehow. Knowing that there is still a place in the university where he could be himself.

His class just finished, and his muscles ache from being too tense for the entire duration of the class, but he wants to see himself do the routine with more fervor. He wants to see himself dance the routine they way it supposed to be danced. Because the routine their instructor had taught, to Jongin at least, was one of the most beautiful ones he’s seen ever. It’s a solo routine, which has lyrical, jazz, and ballet touches. It’s a routine that banks on passion and emotion.

So he goes to his favorite place in the university, the abandoned basement dance room. Beside the dance room are two vocal rooms. But the basement is empty, as always. No one really dares to visit the basement practice rooms anymore, after the so-called accident that injured two students.

Jongin still frowns upon that incident though, knowing that it’s the reason why there’s a gaping hole on floorboards of the dance room. And the cause of the hole? Something entirely unrelated to dancing.

At least the culprits were decent enough to temporarily cover the hole with some plywood, but it’s highly unlikely for it to be fixed anytime soon.

So Jongin just avoids it when he dances, careful not to lose himself too much and just end up injuring himself.

He sets his bag down on the corner of the room and takes out his mini speakers. Their instructor was kind enough to give out copies of the music they were using for the routine after the class. Jongin is always thankful for situations like these, especially since the music was arranged by their instructor himself.

He presses play and allows himself to be carried away. He remembers all the steps, matching the movements of his arms and legs to the beat and melody of the music.

It’s moments like these that make him fall in love with dancing even more. Because when he dances he forgets. He forgets his obligations. He forgets his responsibilities. He forgets about the crown. He forgets about who he is.

And even just for a while, he feels somewhat normal. As if he could actually pursue his dreams of performing on stage.

To him, that’s the magic of dance.

“Wow.”

Jongin snaps out of his daze when he hears an unfamiliar voice. He turns around and sees wide eyes peeking through the door. His heartbeat speeds up, because he’s never been in this situation before. He’s never been caught, because no one even bothers using the practice rooms in the basement since there are a lot of rooms in the building available.

The boy panics when their eyes meet, but he shows no intention of running away. Jongin’s initial instinct is to act cold and push the other person away, but something in his gut tells him otherwise.

And he listens.

“Um, hello?”

Jongin couldn’t believe it, but the boy’s eyes grow even wider. Seconds later, he bites his lips, and his gaze softens, turning into a look of adoration that catches Jongin off-guard.

“Hi, sorry for intruding. I was going to use the room beside this, but I heard music so I checked it out.”

Jongin raises his eyebrows, because as far as he knows, no one else uses the basement rooms. But apparently, there’s someone who, like him, is doing some hiding as well.

“I’ve never seen you here though?” he says, genuinely curious as to what the other boy was doing in the basement.

“I go here almost everyday, but I haven’t seen you at all either,” the boy replies, seemingly as shocked and curious as he is.

Jongin considers this new information, and his curiosity only grows further. He’s been practicing there secretly for a couple of months already, and never has he encountered anyone. That’s the reason why he chose the basement room in the first place. It’s the comfort of not worrying whether someone will see him.

“Really? I’ve been going here for about 3 months though,” he says, somehow feeling comfortable enough to divulge some personal information to the boy.

The boy smiles again, and it’s a smile that’s somewhat similar to a smirk, “I’ve been going here for almost year actually, so I guess we just never had the chance to run into each other until now?”

Jongin nods, but he’s quite amazed at how two people could be going to the same place for a couple of months, but never end up meeting.

“Okay, I should go then. Bye…”

“Jongin.”

“Okay, bye Jongin.”

“You’re not telling me your name?”

The boy pauses, seemingly pondering on whether he should give his name or not, but in the end, he says, "Kyungsoo, Do Kyungsoo.”

If there’s one thing that rivals Jongin’s love for dance, it’s his love for books. He likes fantasy and mystery novels in particular. However, despite being grateful that their son has a natural love for literature, his parents have been watching and meddling with his reading lists. They have limited him to one ‘leisure’ book every 3 months, but even the books he will choose are screened by their advisers beforehand. And they have deemed any fantasy novel inappropriate. And instead, they have given him piles of guide and philosophy books. He appreciates them, really. He especially loves the occasional novel that gets inserted in his parents’ assigned reading list.

But since he started college, there’s this series he’s been trying to finish in secret, borrowing the books from classmates and reading it in school.

“Hmm, I didn’t peg you as the Harry Potter type.”

He turns around and sees Kyungsoo leaning against the door frame. He’s wearing his glasses, and Jongin thinks that he looks like the Asian version of Harry Potter, only missing the scar on his forehead.

“What did you expect though?” he asks, genuinely curious as to what image he exudes.

“I’m not sure… I mean I just really didn’t think you were the reading type, actually.”

Jongin finds himself laughing at that, because it’s the same thing his classmate Sehun said when he asked if the other owned the second book in the Harry Potter series.

“Why do people always think that?” he says, putting down the book and inviting the other boy in.

Kyungsoo sits down about 2 feet away from him, still keeping his distance because it’s only the second time their seeing each other.

“I don’t know, you just don’t really feel like the type… Anyway, why are you reading that here? Shouldn’t you be heading home? It’s late.”

Jongin smiles at the concern, but him going home at 8 in the evening is normal. He gets picked up late because his parents wanted him to avoid the rush of the students, so if he has homework he does it at the library or at the basement room.

“I’ll be heading home in a while, don’t worry.”

Kyungsoo nods and picks up the Harry Potter book that Jongin put down earlier. It’s the 4th book, and Jongin thinks that it’s the best so far. And it’s really hard to fight the urge to bring the book home and risk being caught, because he just can’t find it in himself to put the book down.

“I’ve read the entire series, this one’s my favorite book.”

Jongin smiles, appreciating the fact that they’ve found something in common so easily. They settle into a peaceful and comfortable silence, that Kyungsoo breaks.

“Oh, I’ve never asked you, and I hope you don’t mind, but why do you go here?”

The question catches Jongin off-guard, because it came completely out of the blue. And it’s a question he doesn’t know how to answer, because there hasn’t been an encounter as close as this. It’s weird though. That he has fallen into a state of security. That he doesn’t feel the need to hide.

But of course he can’t compromise anything, so he answers, saying as much of the truth as possible without revealing anything.

“I just wanted to be alone, I guess? I found myself much more expressive when I’m alone, when no one’s watching me. And it’s just me and the music. How about you? Why here?”

The other boy smiles, and Jongin sees that it’s a smile that’s masking a lot of other guarded emotions .

"I'm actually not music major, so I can't really use the rooms upstairs..."

The confession shocks Jongin again, because he’s heard Kyungsoo sing through the thin walls of the practice rooms. His voice is amazing, very much so. And Jongin immediately assumed he’s one of the top music majors.

Kyungsoo notices his lack of response and continues, “I wanted to major in music, but my parents won’t fund my college education if I chose music. They said it’d be a useless degree if I want to get married to royalty. Which I don’t plan on doing, ‘cause why should I? I mean, all of them are stuck-up, horrible brats. Why would I hand over my life to one of them?”

Jongin cringes at the mention of the royalties, because even though it’s a known fact that there are several civilians who are opposed to still honoring royal families, he's never encountered anyone who has vocally shown their dislike.

The discomfort between the royal families and the masses was addressed years ago by the conduction of a selection process in lieu of inter-kingdom marriages. Thus giving civilians chances to be married to royalties.

This selection process is done every year. Prince and princess whose parents think that they cannot find someone worthy to be part of their royal families may choose to enlist their children. A thorough search is done, and among all those who submitted their papers, certain ones are chosen as matches for the royalties.

His parents personally want his future wife or husband to be someone from this selection process, saying that in the huge pool of applicants, he’ll eventually find someone that’s worthy to be his life partner.

But it’s something he does not support at all, because he wants to marry someone he loves. Someone he knows and understands. It’s true that some of the arrange marriages could lead to love, but it’s not always the case. And the marriage is more of business deal than a relationship. But he has obligations, and he made promises. Promises that he needs to keep.

The information Kyungsoo’s been dropping on him has left him quite speechless. Which is again noticed by the other, “Oh, sorry for ranting… I just can’t hold it back anymore, and I just feel comfortable saying it to you,” he says, blushing a bit at his confession.

Jongin finds it very endearing, pale cheeks brushed with a bit of pink. It’s funny how he doesn’t even mind that this boy dislikes what he is, where he comes from. There’s this sense of comfort that he feels from the other, and he’s never felt that with anyone else. It’s a new feeling, and it’s refreshing actually.

“It’s okay, uh- Thank you for trusting me.”

They smile at each other warmly, and Jongin knows it’s a start of a beautiful friendship.

Jongin doesn’t remember how it happens, but Kyungsoo has gradually made his way into Jongin’s life. Never has anyone gotten this close to him, the last time being when he was 11 years old. He’s lasted 9 long years without a confidant. Without a friend who he can be himself with. But he realizes that he hasn’t even completely showed himself even. Kyungsoo may know him, his little quirks and weird habits, but he doesn’t know that he’s a prince, who’ll sooner or later will have to rise to his father’s throne.

He’s still trying to figure out how to remedy that gap. But it’s so easy to forget when he’s with Kyungsoo. They started eating lunch together about a month ago, and they have shared so many little things about each other over the palatable cafeteria food. And today is no different.

“Hyung, do you think I’ll get to be a successful dancer?” he asks.

It’s a stupid question, he thinks. But he asks because he wants to know what the only person who’s seen him dance as passionately as he can think of his skills.

“What kind of question is that? Of course, I mean you still haven’t explained to me why you aren’t top of your class, but you’re definitely better than all of them. So yes, you will.”

He blushes at Kyungsoo’s words. The older boy has always been generous with his praise. Ever since they started practicing together, he’s heard nothing but good things from Kyungsoo. Those words, although repetitive, always make him giddy.

“Are you blushing, Jonginnie?”

He touches his cheeks to check, and they do feel very warm, “Yah! Hyung, why are you like this?”

Kyungsoo reaches across the table to pinch his cheeks, cooing at him as if he were a little kid, “Ah, so cute!”

His cheeks flare even more, and he’s never been like this. It’s only Kyungsoo who can turn him into a blushing mess of a teenage girl.
Kyungsoo doesn’t stop there, and he’s teased even more. And he doesn’t mind at all, because Kyungsoo seemed to be so happy. And Kyungsoo’s smile does things to him that he’s never felt before. So he wants to keep Kyungsoo happy as long as he could in anyway he can.

Ever since he was young, being called into his father’s study meant bad things. When he was 8, his father had called to inform him that his favorite tutor will no longer be teaching him, because she was getting married. When he was 12, his father brought him the bad news that his horse had died already. And now, he knows that they’re going to talk about the upcoming selection season, and he’s not yet ready for any of it.

If he was asked 4 months ago whether he was ready to chose the person he’s going to be with for the rest of his life through a very technical process, he would say yes and not think twice about it. Because it’s his duty. Sure there isn’t much power that comes with being a king nowadays, it’s only so much as a title, and the only thing they have power over are the relationships between kingdoms that help in trade and economy. It’s the camaraderie that they take care of. But he feels the weight of it all on his shoulders, and somehow he can’t help but feel passiveness.

He likes Kyungsoo, and there’s no denying that. But how can he admit his feelings, when the other doesn’t even know he’s part of the 1% of the population that Kyungsoo thinks so lowly of. Before, he was so scared of being found out because he would be withdrawn immediately from the university if news got out. Now, Kyungsoo finding out is what keeps him up at night.

He wants to be honest, but he doesn’t know where to start.

He waits for his father to show up with the bad news his well aware of.

“Son,” his father’s baritone voice fills the room, “have you thought about it? Joining this year?”

He’s right, his father called to talk him into joining the selection this year. His cousin, Junmyeon, had joined last year at 26 years old. An age older than what is prescribed. But his father is much more lenient than Jongin’s, allowing him to extend until his last years of eligibility. However, since their side of the family is much more adaptive to the system, despite having someone he loves, he had to enlist for the selection. But Junmyeon is very lucky, because despite the odds of the very intricate and elaborate screening system, he got to marry Jongdae, the boy he’s been dating since he was 18.

He nods curtly as a response, not trusting his voice which might say otherwise.

“Good, I’m glad. Your mother and I just want you to make the right decisions.”

He smiles tightly and bids his father a good night.

There are so many things he needs to think about. Because he can’t just give up like that.

So before he sleeps, he prays to the heavens, to whoever decides to listen to him, that he makes the he indeed makes the right decisions.

He wakes up that morning with a new resolve. While talking a bath he comes up with an a plan, one that he hopes will work out.

He’ll tell Kyungsoo everything. He’ll confess, and hopefully, Kyungsoo would want to enlist in the process and take the risk like Jongdae did. It sounds stupid, and probably selfish. But it’s his, their, best chance.

He leaves the house in a hurry, hoping that he’ll still catch Kyungsoo at the practice room. He’s always brought to school by his driver and a bodyguard, and due to his persistence, they have agreed to drop him off at the back gate of the university instead.

When the car halts near the gate, he immediately jumps off, heading to the performing arts building. He usually arrives in time to hear Kyungsoo practicing a new song, but now all he hears are muffled sobs.

“Hyung?”

He sees Kyungsoo in the corner, with his knees bunched up and his face streaked with tears. And his heart just breaks.

“Hyung, what happened?”, he says, taking Kyungsoo into his arms.

“I- I- I’m engaged, Jongin. To someone I don’t even know, I’m sorry.”

Kyungsoo stops sobbing, but his tears don’t stop falling. And Jongin does all he can to prevent himself from crying as well.

Is it done? Are they done? Even though their feelings are unspoken, they both know it’s real. He’s not sure if it’s love, but it’s a start. A start of something that could be beautiful and everlasting.

But there’s one thing that stands in between them, and it’s their responsibilities.

Their duties to their parents and families.

Just when he thought that things could take a turn for the good, they go spiraling downward. And he’s not sure if it’s something he can remedy.

Luhan. His name is Luhan, and he’s the son of a future business partner. I met him today, and he’s nice. But it’s clear that both of us are just doing this out of obligation. Jongin, you how I feel right? I’m sorry. Really, I am.

Jongin reads the text message over and over again, as if the words will change if he keeps on rereading them. But they don’t. And it’s really going to happen. It’s not some bad dream he can just wake up from.

And the name, the name is a very familiar one. And if he’s right, then it’s a person he knows.

Luhan. Luhan was a senior who graduated a year ago. He was the dance co-captain during Jongin’s freshman year, together with Kim Minseok.

And Jongin clearly remembers that they were together, and there’s a chance they haven’t broken up, considering how serious their relationship was then.

So he decides to take a risk, he’ll look for Luhan. He’ll talk to him and try to convince him to not continue with the engagement.

He sends text messages to some of the seniors now, and they easily direct him to a coffee shop which is part of the chain that Luhan’s family owns.

He gets there easily, walking an entire 3 blocks to get to the cafe. The coffee shop is warm and cozy, and he sees Luhan immediately at the counter, passing on some drinks to the cashier.

“Good morning, how can I help you?”

Luhan’s face brightens up with recognition, “Jongin? Kim Jongin?”

It’s a relief Luhan still remembers him. It’ll be easier to talk to him that way.

“Hi, can I talk to you hyung?”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll be there in a minute.”

He sits at a high stool by the bar, and he waits for Luhan. He’s nerves are getting the best of him, and he’s sweating profusely. Because he hasn’t really talked to Luhan then, they were mere acquaintances.

“This is a surprise, but I assume this is about Kyungsoo?”

This catches him off-guard, because it meant that Kyungsoo talked about him to other people freely. Something that he himself hasn’t even had the courage to do.

“Hyung, please don’t- don’t marry him…”

Luhan gives him a sad smile, one that admits defeat, “You know I don’t want to… I haven’t even told Minseok. God, I don’t even know how to start. You’re very lucky, Jongin. Kyungsoo is very brave and strong.”

He knows he is, and he’s glad that other people see it too.

“I’ll do my best to delay it, and if you have a plan, then do it. Okay?”

He almost cries, because Luhan understands. They’re all just stuck, with responsibilities and duties they have to fulfill. He thanks Luhan and hugs him shameless, grateful that there’s someone who understands.

“Hyung, just join the selection. Please.”

Kyungsoo just gapes at him, not comprehending what he just said, “What? I think I’d rather marry Luhan hyung, than some prince”
It hits him hard, how Kyungsoo thinks so little of them. And he just had to say that now? When he’s on the verge of admitting everything.

“Look, hyung. I have something to tell you. Promise me you’ll try to understand, don’t get mad, okay?”

He takes a deep, because it’s now or never. He won’t have another chance, because time isn’t on their side. The selection and Kyungsoo’s engagement are happening in a week’s time.

Kyungsoo looks worried, but he nods nonetheless, urging Jongin to go on.

“I’m- I’m a prince, hyung. That’s why I’m asking you to join the selection, we can beat the odds right?”

Kyungsoo scoffs and rolls his eyes in disbelief, “Joking at a time like this? Jongin, just quit it.”

“Hyung, but I am! I live at that guarded house 5 blocks away from the school. And here’s a photo of my family.”

He shows Kyungsoo a recent family picture, and he sees a hint of recognition in Kyungsoo eyes.

“So you mean this whole time, you’ve been lying to me?”

“Hyung, I-”

“And you’re asking me to join the selection, even though you know there’s no guarantee that I’ll be matched with you! Ha- I don’t really know you, huh? But I allowed myself to fall for you. How stupid am I?”

There are tears falling down Kyungsoo’s eyes, and it’s hurts him knowing that it’s his fault.

“You know what Jongin, just forget it. You’re just like all of them.”

He grabs Kyungsoo’s wrist before he could complete walk away, and he pleads, with his eyes, with his words, “Hyung, please! I’m sorry, don’t-”

“No, Jongin. Just let me go!”

He does, and Kyungsoo leaves him there. And he knows he messed up, this time he doesn’t know how to fix this all.

In his 20 years of existence, he’s only asked his parents for one favor. And that’s to allow him to take up dance in the university. And now, he’s about to ask them for the biggest favor yet. That’s to allow him to forgo the selection and try to win Kyungsoo’s hand instead.
No matter how he looks at it, his plans look like they’re bound to fail.

Because his two older sisters went through the process, and they both are in very successful marriages. Because his parents were part of the council that decided on the selection process, and they are strong advocates of it. Will they let their only son forgo the process? Highly unlikely.

But he wants to take a chance. Because he’d rather take a risk than not do anything at all.

“Appa? Umma?”

His parents are already at the dinner table, having an animated conversation while waiting for the food to come. They’re a match made in heaven, Jongin thinks. Because they complement each other very well, and up to this day, they keep this silent but steady love that radiates around them.

“Jongin, come join us!”

His mother says, a warm smile brightening her face. People always say he got most of her features and his father’s built. The perfect mix of his parents.

He sits on his father’s left, in front of his mother. And he gathers as much courage as he can, “I don’t want to enlist this year…”
Silence fills the room, and there’s no more turning back.

“It’s okay, you can enlist next year,” his father says, missing his point entirely.

“No, appa, umma. I don’t want to undergo through the selection, ever.”

Before his parents can react violently, he continues, “There’s someone. And he’s everything I never thought I needed. He’s the first and probably the last person that will make me feel this way. He’s mean to me, and he teases me a lot. But I don’t care. And it’s amazing that I don’t care, right? I don’t want to marry any else, please don’t make me.”

His parents share a look, and his mother dons a huge smile on her face.

“Why would force you? It’s clear that you’ve found someone who matches you very well. You don’t need the selection to help you.”

His father clears his throat, a small smile on his lips, “I’m glad you’ve found someone, son. I hope you take care of him.”

They eat in a pleasant silence. He’s thankful that things worked out. And now there’s only one more thing he needs to do, patch things up with Kyungsoo and hope he’s not too late.

It’s 8 pm on a Sunday evening, but he knows Kyungsoo will be there. Because it’s where he hides and allows himself to let loose. Like him, Kyungsoo likes forgetting his responsibilities, and his escape is music.

His driver brings him to the university, and he’s right. Because he hears Kyungsoo singing a very sad tune that touches his heart and clenches it so tightly. He knows there’s a huge chance that Kyungsoo won’t want anything to do with him, but he’s not taking any chances. He’d rather be outright rejected, than regret for the rest of his life for letting the chance pass him by.

“Hyung…”

Kyungsoo turns around, and there’s a sad look on his face. A similar look of defeat that Luhan wore when they met days ago.

“What are you doing here, Jongin?”

“Please marry me.”

He says outright, and Kyungsoo looks affronted by the frankness. He didn’t want to prepare some speech, because he doesn’t want to use too much words. For his feelings are simple and clear.

“Marry you? You know I’m engaged right?”

“I talked to Luhan hyung, he told me he’ll help us. He’ll delay the engagement announcement, long enough for me to talk to your parents. Kyungsoo hyung, please. You don’t have to marry me now. I’ll court you, don’t worry. And I’ll wait, no matter how long you ask me to.”

There’s an unreadable look on Kyungsoo’s face, and all Jongin could do is hope that the other considers this. Because he realizes that they’re too young for marriage after all. And that if he wants to be with Kyungsoo, he has to work really hard to gain his trust and love.

“Okay,” Kyungsoo says, a smile on his face that tugs on Jongin’s heartstrings, “I’ll think about it.”

And that’s all Jongin needs to hear.