Chapter 3

Beautiful Memories

"Hi!"       

Jonghyun stood almost stoned at the figure in front of him. Standing still in his position, his eyes followed the white blonde-haired man towards where he was. The man, then waving his hands in front of the brown-haired man bursts out laughing.

"Jonghyun-ah! HAHAHAHAHAHA-" Cutting off himself by laughing harder almost breathless.

"Hey! What's happening to you? Are you okay? Why are you staring at me like that? I-is there something on my face?" Kibum, now looking like a nervous child.

Just then, Jonghyun remembers that the man in front of him was afraid of bugs. Like a cartoon character, Jonghyun's imaginary light bulb lit up as he thinks of an idea. I got you now, Kim Kibum.

"K-Kibum...you're afraid of bugs, r-right?" Playing his little prank, Jonghyun eyes Kibum with pretend nervousness in his eyes.

"Why? I-is there one, Jonghyun?"

"Don’t move, okay?" Extending his forearm, Jonghyun brushes his fingers across Kibum's silky white-blonde hair. It was always so soft and smooth. As always. Jonghyun slightly getting off-guard on his prank realizes he’s been grasping on Kibum's hair. Unmoving.

"J-Jonghyun-ah..." Kibum whispers nervously, waking Jonghyun from his thoughts.

As if on cue, Jonghyun shouts and runs out of Kibum's sight. Kibum, however, looking stupid messing his hair up calls for Jonghyun asking if the non-existent bug on his hair was gone. After a few seconds of shouting and uselessly asking the person who now disappeared from his sight, Kibum realizes that nobody was answering him and sights Jonghyun running into a cafe looking back at him with an annoyed look painted on his face.

Kibum feeling sad, tries to remember where Jonghyun had gone and follows him slowly.

Panting heavily, Jonghyun entered the café he and his friends talked about. Without scanning the place, he heard familiar voices calling for his name. It was none other than his best friends, Lee Jinki and Kim Joonmyun. Showcasing his gummy smile, Jinki greets his best friend with a man hug while the shorter male returns the smile and hug like he wasn't panting because of running away from his little prank. Jinki draped his arm on Jonghyun and faced their other bestfriend who was as tall as the latter.

They said their greetings and some story telling which Jonghyun did mostly. They felt hunger sink in their bodies after a loud talk mostly filled with Jinki’s laugh. Joonmyun was the one who ordered and paid as well while Jinki excused himself to the comfort room which leaves Jonghyun alone in their table. He hears the chimes hung by the café door ring and what catches his attention was a familiar-looking figure seemingly walking to him. Jonghyun, trying not to act suspicious, runs to the comfort room and bumps into Jinki.

“Oh! Jonghyun-ah, why’d you leave our table?” Jinki puts his hand over the shorter’s shoulder stopping him from his tracks.

“I’m sorry Jinki hyung. I can’t hold it in anymore.” Jonghyun holds his stomach acting pained.

“Ah…are you okay?” Jonghyun sighs in relief in his thoughts knowing that his older friend didn’t suspect anything.

“Yes. I’m fine. I just really have to let this smelly thing out.”

“Okay. Take your time.” Chuckles.

“Yeah. Be back later.” Jonghyun immediately enters the comfort room and locking the door. He walks back and forth thinking of a way to avoid Kibum. After some minutes, he gives up. Why do I have to avoid him, though? It’s not like I did something wrong. Jonghyun thinks to himself pushing aside his little prank on Kibum. He goes out the comfort room and scans the café. Finding no sight of the white blonde-haired man, he continues to walk back to their table.

“Hi!” A familiar voice whispers to his ear.

“AH!” Startled, Jonghyun almost went out of his balance flapping his arms in the air.

“Do not do that, Kibum!” Jonghyun bursts out shouting at the voice’s owner.

“I’m sorry…” Kibum with sorry eyes, sways softly side to side with his hands held together behind him, looking like a child being scolded.

“What is it that you want? I thought I made it clear that I’m not gonna find your little boyfriend.” Jonghyun continues while walking back to their table and sitting down on the chair he left.

“Please, Jonghyun? You’re the only one that’s ever talked to me.”

“No. I don’t want to get involved in your little love life. Go ask the police if you want.” He sips his drink not noticing the confused look thrown at him by his friends across him.

“I already did. They just passed by me as if I they didn’t even hear me.”

“Then-” Jonghyun was cut off when Jinki snaps his finger in front of his face.

“Jonghyun, who are you talking to?” Joonmyun asks curiosity very evident in his voice.

“Oh..sorry. Joonmyun-ah, Jinki hyung, Kibum here is asking me, more like begging actually, to find his boyfriend for him and I don’t want to and he’s very stubborn.” Taking a small sip, Jonghyun looks at his friends and receives laughs from them. Loud laughs, as if they were laughing at a crazy guy.

“Jonghyun-ah, are you drunk? Have you not already moved on from Kibum?” Jinki shakes his head, chuckling a little.

“Drunk? Hyung, I’m fine. Look, I think you are the drunk one. Kibum’s right here.” Jonghyun points at the empty space beside him.

“Jonghyun-ah, we get that you’re still jetlagged from your trip but it’s not funny to laugh at someone dead.” Jinki, looking more serious, munches on his cupcake and stops when it was Jonghyun’s turn to laugh.

“Hyung, I’m serious here. I’m not jetlagged anymore. I’m fine but I’m really serious. Kibum’s asking me to help him find his boyfriend and he’s here. Right beside me. Are you guys blind?”

“Jonghyun-ah, did you not know yet?” Jinki and Joonmyun looked at each other, worry overcoming their eyes.

“Know what?” Jonghyun asks, brows furrowed.

“You go tell him, Jinki hyung.” Joonmyun whispers softly.

“Jonghyun-ah, this gonna be hard to believe but believe us or not…” Sighs.

“Kibum’s dead, Jonghyun-ah. Just a year ago. He lies at the cemetery at the end of the town.”

Kibum’s dead.

Kibum is dead.

Kibum.

Is.

Dead.

Chuckles. Jinki and Joonmyun heard nothing but small chuckles from their brown-haired friend. They heard it stop when Jonghyun averts his gaze on Kibum’s ‘spot’ earlier. Jonghyun doesn’t see Kibum there.

Wait.

Hold on.

So…

So that’s why he kept disappearing.

What an idiot you are, Kim Jonghyun.

The three finished their meal in a quiet way and a gloomy aura after the sudden revelation that Kibum died. Jonghyun’s friends couldn’t help but glance at each other when Jonghyun spaces out which was all throughout their meal. They finished it after some time and bid their goodbyes. The two wanted to accompany Jonghyun to Kibum but he assured them that he doesn’t have any interest in going and that he was fine. He just wanted to rest so they let him be.

Two days later, Jonghyun finds himself by the gates of the cemetery where Kibum’s grave was buried. He asked for the exact location of his grave but his feet felt like it was made of lead. Even after thinking about it the whole night when he was told the news, Jonghyun couldn’t find himself believing it. He didn’t want to believe it too. He walked too slow passing by numerous tombs –some had flowers and candles while some were left with the grass growing and covering them. When he finally arrived at the stone plate where the name was engraved in gold, Jonghyun felt his knees go weak resulting to him halting and crouching down. There on the gray tombstone was Kibum’s name, his birthday, the day of his death, and a small quote saying the most beautiful message.

It read, “You left us beautiful memories, your love is still our guide, and though we cannot see you, you’re always by our side.”

Standing there motionless, Jonghyun felt a pang in his heart. The news of Kibum’s death was far worse than him having dropped out from college. Jonghyun turns to leave after an hour or two and sees a smiling Kibum by a tree. He went to the man and made his way by a small garden. Still smiling, Kibum followed his lead.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jonghyun suddenly turns to his follower.

“Tell you what, Jonghyun?” Eyes evident with somewhat a mix of curiosity and confusion.

“That…

“T-that you’re…” Sighs.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you’re dead? All this time I’ve been looking like an idiot talking to you and people don’t even see you and only I could. All this time I’ve been talking to your ghost, Kibum. Why didn’t you tell me that?” Jonghyun was breathless. Why is he here talking to the said ghost again?

“I’m dead? Oh my! How can I find him if I’m dead?” Golden caramel orbs now widened in shock and panic.

“What do you mean? Kibum this isn’t funny anymore.”

“Jonghyun…please help me find him. I-it’s gonna be the last time.” Tears now actually start to fall. Jonghyun heaves a deep sigh and massages his temples for a while.

“Alright. Fine. I’ll do it.” He stares at Kibum for a while. It’s gonna be the last time.

“Really? You’re gonna do it? For real?” Eyes lit up like a child.

“Don’t make me change my mind, Kibum. I already said yes, didn’t I?

“Y-yeah. Let’s head to my apartment first.” Kibum started walking as he leads their way. Long after, they reached Kibum’s apartment and went up a few floors. Kibum’s place isn’t really big but it’s fitted for at least two persons to live. Kibum went straight to his room and started looking inside a cabinet.

“This is how I get into your room, huh?” Jonghyun whispers to himself. For so long since he’d known the other, he’s never been to his house or anything that came close to the word home.

“Huh?”

“Wha- No..nothing.” A shake of his head.

“Go look around, Jonghyun. There might be any trace of him.” Kibum ordered whilst he was looking through his things.

“I’ll look here.” Jonghyun crouched down in front of a small pile of boxes. He opened the boxes one by one and saw nothing but educational toys for kids making his brows furrow. After some time, he sees and grabs an identification card of a young man maybe in his mid-twenties.

S.M. Center. It read at the top part.

Choi Minho was the name of the owner.

“Why does he have this?” Jonghyun mumbled to himself but loud enough to make Kibum jerk his head up and turn to where Jonghyun was. Kibum gasps at the sight and sits beside the confused man.

“This is him! This is him, Jonghyun-ah. Wow! Thank you so much for helping me. You’re the best.” Holding his two thumbs up, Kibum’s eyes lit up. What startled Jonghyun was when the latter jumped into him making them fall on the bed. As usual, Kibum was smiling.

“Thank you so much, Jonghyun-ah!” Jonghyun felt the awkwardness sip through them so he pushes Kibum up, gently.

“A-alright…I’ve done my part. I’m gonna go now, Kibum. I have something else to do.” Jonghyun stood up leaving the room and the apartment.

“Hey! Jonghyun!” Kibum followed the said man grasping the I.D. tightly in his hands. With his fast ghostly legs, he managed to catch Jonghyun and extended both his arms, blocking the leaving man’s way.

“What is it now, Kibum?” the blocked man groaned at his path-blocker.

“I c-can’t meet him if I’m a ghost, right? He won’t see me. You have to talk to him for me. I have to say my goodbyes to him. I have to tell him I love him a-and…a-and that I’m gonna miss him.” Uncontrolled tears start to fall down a certain pair of caramel orbs and down to his reddened nose.

“I never said I’ll meet him, Kibum. I only agreed to find him not talk to him.” Eyes flaring up with anger and something else quite bitter.

“Please, Jonghyun. I have to at least say something to him before I leave.” Soft sobs were emitted from Kibum’s small lips.

“No.” Jonghyun strongly said. He pushed Kibum’s arms aside making the sobbing man flinch and hold his arms.

Mustering his voice, Kibum voiced out his heart.

“Are you that numb?! Are you that…loveless?! Have you ever been heartbroken? I guess not because you don’t even have a heart to start with. D-do you know how he would feel when I leave without saying my last words to him? Do you know how I would feel? You’re that numb, Jonghyun. You don’t even know how others feel. You don’t know because you don’t care. You never care.”

Stopping in his tracks, Jonghyun felt a pang of pain in his chest. So that was how Kibum saw him all those times.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’ve never been heartbroken and I don’t have a heart but it isn’t my fault I became like that, Kibum.” Jonghyun felt like crying because of Kibum’s outburst but he’d rather walk away and calm himself than spare a tear on the ghost.

Walking away, Jonghyun heard Kibum’s sobs from loud to faint until it was gone. He disappeared. Of course, he would always disappear. He was out of the building when Jonghyun decides to go home.

With a heavy heart, he heaves his deepest sigh of the day.

With hurt.

Here it is! I'm so excited and nervous or your reactions! I hope this passes your expectations. I was supposed to update this yesterday, November 3 (It was my birthday and this is my gift to you). I felt like I should be the one giving you a gift and...and..here's Evanesce. 

-Fade

*insert orchestra*

HI. I'M STILL ALIVE.

-EVNSC