~CHAPTER NINE~

            It’s already 10:15 pm but Yoona can’t find sleep. She had tried counting sheep multiple times but will only get distracted because Yuri keeps coming back in her mind. And after she had experienced holding Yuri close to her when she brought her to the clinic, she realized that she likes to hold her always. She’s even hugging her pillow tight, imagining that it was Yuri that she was holding. Her desire for Yuri has become stronger than before and it is scaring her. She might not control her feelings for her in the future. Her feelings are overwhelming her again. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Is this still a simple crush or more than that?

‘I need to talk to someone.’ She thought.

So she stood up from her bed and made her way over to her dad’s study hoping that her dad is still awake. Thankfully he is, as she saw a small illuminating light coming from the room. She went to peep through the small opening of the door.

“Dad?” she softly called and gently pushed the door open.

“Yoong.” Her dad acknowledged and he stopped what he was doing. “What is it dear? Why are you still awake?”

“That’s the problem actually; I can’t sleep.” Yoona then went to sit on the chair beside her dad’s desk.

Her dad takes off his glasses and gave all his attention to his daughter. “Is something troubling you?”

Yoona just nodded as her answer and it worried her dad. “Oh, what is troubling you? Is it about school?”

Yoona shook her head and is pouting cutely. Will she tell her dad? But he said that he’ll support her all the way.

“Dad, I think I’m… in love.” She said not looking at her dad. Her dad just blinked and is not sure what to react to that. Yoona is starting to regret that she talked to her dad as he didn’t spoke. “Dad?” she looks at him this time. But her dad’s expression is unreadable but slowly, a smile is forming on his lips.

“Who’s the lucky guy that took my daughter’s heart?”

“Err…” Yoona looks away again and started squirming on her seat. “It’s… it’s a girl.” She bit her lip.

“Oh, does she like you too?” Her dad is happy that his daughter can open up this kind of matters to him. At least he can guide and support his daughter all the way.

“I don’t know but… dad, I am not really sure if… I am really in love or if what I feel for her is just a crush. I wanna know how to distinguish those two.” Yoona looks hopefully to her dad.

“Hmm…” her dad leaned on the backrest of his chair, thinking. “Honestly, it is hard to distinguish those two. But if what you’re feeling for her is just a crush, you’ll eventually feel turned off if she has shown you something negative about her, whether it’s physical, a habit or attitude. But if it’s more than that, you will still find yourself admiring her despite all of the negative things that you’ll learn about her.”

Yoona fell silent at what her dad had said to her. It’s deep and she found herself hoping that what she is feeling is not just a crush.

“You fell silent.” Her dad noticed.

“I was just thinking. What you said is deep, dad. I didn’t know you have that side.” Yoona tried to joke and her dad just chuckled.

“Of course…Sooner you’ll understand what I mean especially I have experienced it already. So what do you think is your feelings for her?”

“I’m not sure yet. But how can I figure it out?”

“Get to know her. Don’t rush things Yoong. Take time to know her and later, you’ll learn about how you feel for her. And by that, you can avoid feeling hurt. But I am not saying that you won’t feel hurt in the process because feeling hurt is a common thing when it comes to heart matters.”

Yoona nodded. She still can’t completely understand what her dad is saying but she will do what he advises since he has already experienced it.

“And also, when you love, always remember to love yourself. Never neglect yourself in the process of loving someone. It’s not romantic; it is a foolish thing to do to give all your love for someone and forgetting yourself.”

“Dad, I’m not even sure yet if this is love or if I only like her.”

“Even so, listen to me. I just want to let you know about those things. Dear, you’re already thinking on how you feel, so it can be serious. This is the first time you consulted me about how you feel towards your crush. Remember, when you’re still in middle-school? You told me that you’re crushing on... what’s his name?”

“Dad, just get to the point.” Yoona rests her chin on her hand that is resting on the armrest.

“Okay, what I’m trying to say is, you just told me that you have a crush on him and that’s it. You’re not worrying yourself on how you feel towards him.”

“I’m still young that time.”

“That’s the point Yoong; you’re still young until now. You’re just 16 and you’re already thinking about what you feel towards that girl.”

Yoona nodded and suddenly smiled as she thought of Yuri. “Thanks dad. I’ll take your advises.”

“You must, Yoong. You must.”

“Goodnight dad. Love you.” Then she stood up and gave her dad a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“Goodnight Yoong. I love you too. Go force yourself to sleep, its late now.”

“Okay, you too dad.” Then she made her way back to her room.

*

*

On the other hand, Yuri can’t sleep too. She has been thinking about Yoona and also on what Hyoyeon had said that it’s the first time Yoona has cared for someone at school, and it happens to be her. And Yoona even said to her that, letting her do things for her sake is enough.

But what does that mean? Is Yoona really just being friendly to her? Was that only her intention? And the foolish thing she did is sending a heart symbol to her. Thankfully, Yoong didn’t ask about it.

Yuri put a hand on her chest, Yoona is making her feel something but she’s not ready to acknowledge it.

Her feelings started developing, since she saw the true side of Yoona at the playground that Valentine’s Day and it’s only keeps on growing when Yoona helped her in Math, when she felt scared for Yoona’s safety from her obsessed admirers and it grew more when Yoona came for her aid and bravely brought her to the clinic without thinking about how others will react to it. Yuri is just denying it all along because she doesn’t want to think that she’s falling for Yoona because it will only mean heartbreaks in the end because she will just leave her. She has to be careful with her actions and not let her emotions take in. How she hopes that Yoona is just being friendly to her. But for now, she will keep her distance from Yoona. She is thinking that the developing feelings that she has for Yoona will die down if she won’t interact with Yoona for days.

*

After her talk with her dad, Yoona never had the guts to approach Yuri. Especially, it seems t