"I love you," she said, the words slipping easily from her lips.

I blinked and was momentarily frozen.

"You know what I mean, don't try to make a joke from it," she whispered, her eyes still closed. A soft smile stole across her peaceful features.

I did know what she meant. She meant it in the way that she loved me as a dear, good friend, but nothing else. It was painful to hear those words. I would rather have had her tell me that she hated me with all the passion in the world. At least then she would be feeling some passion towards me. But love… this love… it just wasn't bearable.

"I love you too, Seulgi," I replied. My voice became so quiet I almost mouthed some of the words, but she still understood – "More than you'll ever know."

She opened her eyes and smiled up at me, then kissed me on the cheek. The song was over.

"Seulgi," I said firmly, my heart heavy, weighed down with too many emotions. "I have to go now."

She looked at me, surprised. "What, now? Why? Where?"

"I'm sorry. I can't stay any longer. Have a great honeymoon, okay?" I cringed inside. Their honeymoon – I didn't even want to think about what Kai and Seulgi would be doing the night they arrived at their destination. It tore me apart. "I love you," I said seriously. "I do. Call me the moment you guys get back. Tell Kai he'd better be there too when you call me so I can talk to him as well. Have fun." I kissed her ever so gently on her cheek. "You're his now. And he's yours. Just…just don't you two forget about me now, okay?" I reiterated.

"You guys are the best friends I've ever had. You…you make me laugh every day. Kai, he's loyal and good to me, and I love him like a brother. You two – deserve each other…you guys belong together." I swallowed, hard. "Have a good honeymoon, a good life. Goodbye." Goodbye, Seulgi. I love you. I'm in love with you and have been for the past four years. It just took too long for me to show it, and now it's too late. Goodbye.

"Wait, Lay, where are you going?" she said, perplexed when I pulled away. "Aren't you going to stay for the party afterwards? Remember, Kai made reservations to both you and Kai’s favorite restaurant. We were going to go out for dinner…remember?" she said, trailing off.

"I'm so sorry, Seulgi," I said. "You know I'd love to go. You know I would. But…I can't. I'm sorry. Call me, yeah? See you later."

I backed away and melted into the sea of dancers, invisible now to Seulgi. It was too dark to see anyone anyway. My heart ached and my head pounded – would it ever go away?

'Kai, he's loyal and good to me, and I love him like a brother.'

My own words repeated in my head, and it only strengthened my resolve and determination to let my bestfriend and Seulgi be married and happy. Kai was, to me, one of the greatest people I had ever known, and my best f