So I forgot to mention that this story will only be a one-shot. I hope I didn't kill your expectations with this story. ;_;

-------

The heavy downpour of rain was unrelenting; continuous big droplets falling from the dark intimidating clouds that loomed above the city. They were steady in drenching poor souls that unfortunately couldn't take cover on time or find available structure to protect them from getting wet. People were busy bustling here and there; umbrellas that were now thought of as something precious opened to specially serve as temporary shields. Shops were gladly opened up past closing time to accommodate strangers and possible customers; cars taking precaution while skidding on the slippery road outside. Children were at home drinking hot chocolate and everyone wished the rain to just stop.

A man clad in thin sweaters and jeans sat alone on a park bench; his clothes clinging unto his petite figure like second skin as the rain mercilessly downed upon him. His lack of warm and thick clothing or even an umbrella made him shiver due to the fact that he was now highly susceptible to the cold. The fringe of his hair was already sticking to his forehead; his make-up he spent hours working on long ruined.

The man's dark eyes blankly gazed around his surroundings. The park he was currently at was nearing to be almost isolated; a small almost sadistic satisfaction forming on the pit of his stomach once it registered in his mind that he'd be mostly alone in this dreary weather.

And he didn't mind being alone if it meant he could finally deal with the thoughts running wildly amok in his mind; if it meant he could lose a war with himself and break down without anyone seeing how pitiful he really was.

Ryeowook sighed deeply; exhaling every protective measure he had instilled within himself. He finally let go of the mask he always wore; crushed the high thick walls he carefully built around himself.

But he knew, he do knew from deep inside him, that once the rain stopped, he had to wear his mask once again; pretend to be someone he wasn't.

Ryeowook tried to smile; the smile bright and happy. However, not a minute had passed that the smile was already tunring into sad and just so fake that he slapped himself on the face just to stop it from growing into a grin so hollow and despairing. He decided he wouldn't smile for now; having already been tired from smiling in front of everyone just so that he could fool them that everything was okay and he was not already breaking and crumbling down to depression.

He tried to laugh; the laugh carefree and cheerful. Although, like he guessed what would happen, the laugh soon turned into something akin to a depreciating chuckle mixed with an almost maniacal chortle that he had to bite his lips hard so as to stop them from releasing any gut-wrenching laugh. He figured he wouldn't laugh for the time being, as he already wanted to take a break from laughing with everyone just to show them that he still had good things going on his life and that he was not already thinking on ending his life full of misfortunes and heartaches and painful calls for help.

And then, his smile so bright and his laugh so cheerful turned into series of choked hollow sobs.

It had always been like this. Ryeowook would always sit alone outside the pouring rain; would always sneak out without anyone noticing. Or maybe, as the only thing he had grown to believe in, no one just really cared whether he disappeared or not.

And that was why he would always cry. He would always cry out his sorrows along with the sky because he knew that if someone saw tears on his face without thinking it was the rain, they would tease and mock him for being weak and just plain pitiful.

But the truth was, the painstaking truth that kills him everytime, he was crying along with the rain because he was so damn afraid that everyone would just ignore him if they ever heard and saw him cry without the rain droplets covering up for him.

That was why Ryeowook was crying once again amidst this dark dreary weather. He was full of insecurities and fears that those were already taking him in a chokehold; putting him in a cage he knew he couldn't escape. No matter how hard he tried to call for help, he would always back down before he could even utter a desperate plea. And he knew that wasn't good, wasn't helpful, but what else could he do?

What else could he do when everything he knew was the reason he was like this in the first place?

What could he do when all he knew was that everyone, everyone he ever cared for and loved, didn't feel the same and would just let him rot and die? What could he do when all he knew was that no one would even help if he ever asked for mercy? What could he do when he knew no one would notice his sufferings and give him hope all because he was useless and couldn't do anything right?

Oh, that was right. He was useless.

Ryeowook would always ask himself why he couldn't do anything right. He would always wonder why the things he spent so much effort on couldn't amount to something of worth. He would wonder why he always made mistakes. He would ask why he was not as talented as everyone. He would always ask why his life had been like this.

He would always wonder why he was ever born in the first place.

Ryeowook would admit he was not perfect and that he was full of flaws. Hell, every human wasn't perfect and they were riddled with flaws from head to toe, too. But what he couldn't understand was why he subjected to so much hate and sneers and abandonment; why just because he couldn't be someone else everybody would just leave him to suffer on his own.

And, since the beginning up to this time, Ryeowook always wondered why he was ever accepted into Super Junior.

That was the biggest question he had ever asked himself since he first debuted. His co-members were everything people wanted to be; they were everything Super Junior needed and lived by. Leeteuk was a great leader to all of them and was the reason Super Junior was still staying strong; also a talented MC whenever needed.