Personal Message


The sky is so beautiful and I like to see it so much when I am still a child. It’s so mesmerize that I can stare at it for hours. I used to lay on my back in PE period, skipped it cause I hate it. No the PE class hate me. I am no athlete and I only can run so fast when my mom tried to make me eat carrot and tomato. Get it off me.. I always scream. I don’t care if I have to wear glasses and few years later I am found myself wearing glasses and it thickens every year.


Can I be a millionaire and get a Lasik one day?

Haha.. I hope so.

I hate boys too. I hate real boys. They are bullies for me. I am screaming and jumping when I know I will spent my whole five years of secondary school which for some of you consist as middle school  and high school in an all-girl high school. No boys and only dream boy only. By that time I like Bae Yong jun. Haha.. I become a girl that obsessed with guy I can’t get. I am weird thinking girl. I went through four years with her me keep changing my bias. Yeah throw shoes at me for that. It change from Bae yong Jun to Kwon sang woo and Yamada ryosuke. In the fouth year I am in love with Korean boy idol and it start with Yunho… to Yunjae, I met Kim hyun joong and Kim bum after that..

Its last year when I first found SHINee officially, I met them early but I avoid them in the first. Yeah.. SHINEE WORLD throw shoes at me for that. It just I have so much bias that I have to ditch my BYJ and KSW. I gave up YunhoJaejoong when my friend called dib on them.

It start when I noticed Taemin face in a magazine early last year. I am like saying this to my friend.

“He[taemin] had such a Dangerous smile. Its evil [I am a dramatic girl.. its just metaphor] and I can’t see it too long. This kind of smile would make a girl like melt like an ice cream in the microwave if I look at it too long. So dangerous”  And I flipped the magazine just to have me flipping to that page that I found myself gazing at so many times this years.

Its funny that few week later I ditch all my other bias for SHINee.. Mianhei Kim hyun Joong. I still like you but I am more into Shinee just because I googled for some sort of dance video and I stumbled across a Taemin video in a show dancing to Let me know by NLT music. I am charmed when I see his face dancing smoothly to the song and I kinda repeating the video for more few times. I am in love when I see him dancing. I had the feeling growing and when I recognize him and know he is Taemin. Its already too late me, you hear it. Its too late. I am mad in love with him and I cried to know he is younger a month than me. Mommmy.. why you let me out out so early can’t you just wait a month. I can’t call him oppa. Depressing.. urghhh.. its been like a year and three month after I fell in love with him.*sighed* it feel like I am more and more liking him. All I wanted in guy I can’t have. Cute, childlike, handsome, y, angel smile [iressitable..], tall, lanky [I hate too much muscle.], passionate in something [dancing] and plus he is a dancing machine.

Haha.. I feel so fool for trying to ignore that heart melting smile in the first time. I never had ever like a group. It mean I never like all the member in a group and now I like all the shinee member and not just Taemin. they are all just awesome by their difference and the character. They voice is good and I found myself founding many of my favourite song in their song. The unique voice is mesmerizing. I loves music and if I hate the song I would just say it even if it is Taemin.  I am charming more when my friends drag me watching hello baby with her. I am more stole by SHINee’s character in there, who cares if that isn’t their real character. even in AFF we found many created character for them.. that is them , the idol and that is what we fans do sometimes [not everyone okay..], imagining what is the real them.. nehh.. and still I believe they are real human too. A normal person that have right to do anything they want to do so I just gave my bless to Jonghyun when the dating issues come out and he is being attack by many critic and being bash cruelly.

What? *Don't look at me like that..*

He is a guy plus he is a human. He had heart and I am just broken too when I see him bowed himself apologising for what he done. For me he hasn’t doing anything wrong. I know its hurt when the people we laugh is in love with other but heart is not something that we can choose to do what we want. Yeah if that even if I have to face Taemin dating few years after this. It’s a reality and this just show he is a human and that time I probably can escape my own obsession and start to go for a really real man, a real man that share the mutual feelings as mine and not so boys.

The time passed as I met AFF when I am surfing for some SHinee fics. That I found few good Kpop lover that I enjoy friend and few I annoyed.. Mianhei… I didn’t do that in purpose.. I found AFF the as the spider web and I am just lured in and stucked until now.. as AFF becoming my second FB, besides no one around me is AFF, I think so but who knows, its maybe them whom i know also stucking in here pleasantly. By then it’s still a secret and besides it is safer surfing in here. No one knows our identity and I don’t care how much secret I leak inside here, knowing none of my friends would know it. It’s my alter ego. I have many good dongsaeng and unnies here and I am welcoming new friends everytime I logged in AFF. Whoops.. I had a cousin in here too but its okay that he know me as much as I know myself.. hehe I love you cuz.. mianhei for logging out. We just keep it as our secret.. neh I won’t let myself get punished only if you exposed me.

haha… I am typing so much.. its just when I am alone like what I am doing right and don’t have any stories or idea I just type what I want. Like I am chatting with someone, its okay. I just want to share a piece of my mind that I know I won’t share with real people around me. Nor did I want to shared my obsession with my mom. That is sucks.. haha..

So for the time being I am being loyal as a SHINee World as I pledge myself as one.

I am proud to be one even if I can’t talk Korean or shout oppa saranghae [its embarrassing beside I am keeping it for someone special that I haven’t found yet..

SHINee Fighting!!!


21 April 2011

04:35 AM



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Picture Credit: Hurmmmm.. I take a lot or I kinda kidnaped them from those girlfriend's tumblr.... its all pretty and I loves all of it..