Live performance was today and I was nervous ... well actually, I was nervous after I had two shots of espresso (I found out about it after I drank it) Before the caffeine, the performance was the last thing on my mind. Like, I knew about it, it was today and all but I didn't care much about it.

I had it all under control but then BAM! my friend gives me caffeine and the demons in me are whispering to me saying how much I'm going to fail, that it's going to be a huge audience (it wasn't even), etc. And I had a nervous breakdown. I almost started crying in English class. I literally rushed out of the class to call a close female friend but she had class so I called Jake.

He immediately asked me if I had any sugar or caffeine in me (this boy knows me too well //tear) and I was quiet and he waas like, "//huge sigh. Okay, just imagine yourself in a grassy field."
Me: "How in the did I end up in a grassy field?"
Him: ", I don't know. You just did, now listen up. You're in a grassy field, its peaceful, sunny but you're not bothered by it --"
Me: "How in the ing hell did I end up in a grassy field? That's what I wanna know."
I'm pretty sure Jake facepalmed lol "Oh my god, would you just ing pay attention?!"
Me: "Okay okay ... But still--" and then I started panicking and then Jake started panicking and he was like, "Breathe in, now."
I do what he says and he's quiet and I ask him (while holding in my breath) "Can I let go now?"
"No."
Silence.
"Now?"
"No."
"I can't breathe though."
"Just shut up, oh my god woman."
I shut up and he finally tells me to let it out ... and I feel a tad bit better. Since I had to go back in class, Jake told me to picture myself in a grassy field and wonder how in the hell I ended up there since I wouldn't shut up about it lol

Now lets skip onto the live performance.

One of the actors didn't make it and like, we were all pissed at him, especially my friend (Brit) who's directing the film so she had to be the business woman.

Now here's the thing. We didn't get any criticism and ours was the shortest (which is good) while everybody else's was around 45 minutes long because we practiced beforehand. We got all our lines done. We knew what we had to do. Everything looked natural ... while the others' ... they had to read off of their scripts. So we were prepared and the others weren't.

At the end of performance, Brit introduced us to everyone and I am offically Irene Sommers! Yaaaaaay! LOL

When she said Irene Sommers, it sounded foreign (duh, I ain't used to it lol) but at the same time, I liked how it sounded ^O^

Oh right, during my part, I locked eyes with this guy I met/befriended and I almost smiled and so he had to quickly look away (Him: "Ooh plant!" <--exactly what he told me after the performance because there was a plant next to my partner lol). PHEW, almost messed up right there.

And oh, one of the actors (this badass, not in a bad way lol, chick in my acting class) wants to cast me in a film. Just that it's mature. There are drugs involved (not real drugs. I will be 'smoking' but it doesn't contain nicotine; they're herbs.) and well ... I do want to try it. Well, I want to step out of my comfort zone and try other characters but like this character is so into drugs and well ... like I said, the film is a mature area.

My character (forgot her name OTL) is 22 and she has a kid and has problems with her baby daddy. So my character is basically an unstabled bad-. I still haven't confirmed it because I want to see the script first :DD

Oh, and tomorrow ... I'm shooting a film with a classmate and my friend (Mel) lol lord am I busy and there are so many opportunities ^O^

At first it was going to be a horror film but my classmate is sorta like the jokester in the class so his ideas are a bit idiotic so it's like watching the "Scary Movie" series.

HALLOWEEEEEEEN. Queen Mary is canceled because my friend is working :( so we've stuck to trick-or-treating. While waiting for night-time to come, I'm doing a haunted house for an elementary school (FYEAH I GET TO SCARE LIL KIDS, I MEAN WHAT) with Mel. The haunted house is actually located in the school's basement and from what my friend has told me, it is ing creepy. So the 'sections' are: A room with dolls, all kinds, even porcelain dolls (dolls scare the ing hell out of me but at the same time, I'm so intrigued by them) ;; Bloody Mary (there is a ing girl's bathroom in the school's basement wtf) ;; Lab (mad scientist and the victim) ;; Clowns (gfdi why Mel ...) and that's all I can remember at the moment.

Oh right, I have decided to go as a badass vampire lol
Black clothes, red lipstick, thick black eyeliner and dat attitude (with the face).

My writing is jumbled as of now because I am so ing sleepy OTL

We will be filming near the beginning of November. The filming for the mature one will be in the middle of November and I don't even know if I'll be able to go to that EDM concert even tho I already paid my friend ._.

Oh, and I made two new friends :DD

Dat dude does not look ing 35 ... like wtf (its the hair ....) and dat girl does not look 21 (must be because she's Asian. OMG NOT BEING RACIST. I CAN'T SEEM TO FIGURE OUT AGES WHEN IT COMES TO ASIANS OTL)

EDIT:
THE NEW ROOMMATE ING SNORES. OH MY LAAAAAWD, WAE. THE LAST ROOMMATE THAT SNORED .... tbh she got kicked out ._.