First blog post and it is already starting on a rather negative side. What can I do? This is my current situation. :(

I don't know where my life is heading to and everyday I'm just going on in a rather robotic manner. What I've been told is that I'll feel more refreshed and energized after getting back to work from a holiday with well spent time at home with family and friends but no.. I'm feeling 10 times more depressed than before. I feel like just staying home and change my number or throw my phone away and dissapear from every person's life except my family.  I do not like what I'm doing nowadays. Yes it gives me salary but I'm just plain miserable. It's the job itself that I don't like but due to the factor of certain circumstances and me being afraid to get out of my comfort zone I'm still stuck here wanting to break something every single day. 

Yea people had been telling me 'hey! you're doing good balancing both your studies and work at the same time but I DO NOT like my job. Not anymore at least. No matter how noble I know it is but I clearly know this is not what I wana do. So what exactly I wana do? I have no idea and that makes the entire situation even more pathetic. Even for studies I'm just literally do it cause I need to. I need that cert. Each time I get home seeing my parents getting older isn't helping either. I wanted to badly to lessen their burden but at this moment I can't do it. Emotionally and physically I'm just buying time before I shut down.